Out of Love Ch. 02

Mark swallowed and turned and leaned on the bar. "I guess I can understand that. When Chloe explained the image you saw when you woke up, well, I'm just surprised any of us as still walking. I don't think I could have taken it without massive damage."

I chuckled a laugh with no humor in it "Oh, I 'm damaged alright. Just trying not to show it right now."

I took a drag.

"What do you want Mark? You need to get that off your chest so you can go back and analyze some more?"

"Actually, I came for that, and to warn you."

"Warn me about what?"

"Chloe took in a lodger."

"She what?" I said, putting down the bottle and giving him my attention.

"She had to make ends meet dude. She's a nurse, you aren't there anymore. She wanted to keep the house because of the memories in it. She had to let out a room to cover the rent."

"What the fuck? Where the fuck are you two in all this? Why isn't Jim bailing her out? He was doing that pretty good in other ways last time I saw him." I exploded. In an abstract way, I was quite interested in my own outraged reaction. I didn't know I cared any more. Evidently I did. Maybe Amy was on to something.

"She won't take anything from either one of us J. You know Chloe, once she gets an idea in her head. She feels that friendship with us has cost her enough, without it costing her more monetarily."

I stopped and considered what he said. It did ring true. If Chloe had remorse, and I was pretty sure she would given how she'd been last time I saw her, this is how she would react. She wouldn't cut off communication, but it would be carefully rationed.

"So she has a lodger. Much joy might it bring her." I said, trying to convince myself I didn't care.

"This guy... well, I'll be honest. He's one of my guys. He's an installer. Although when I recommended him, I had no idea he was.. well.."

"Was what?" I said.

"Well, we've had some complaints. Some of the women he's been on jobs for have complained that he's been leering at them, making suggestions. One even said he grabbed her ass. We had to pay out a lot to make that go away."

"Let me get this straight." I said, my voice rising a bit and me not caring. "First you fuck my wife, making me leave; now you've put some guy in her home that is potential rapist??"

Mark nodded unhappily. "We just discovered he'd got a rap sheet for assault, from 10 years ago. I can't fire him for that, but... you need to know. I don't know what you can do about this, but you need to know."

"Where the FUCK have you been during all this? Why haven't you done anything about it? You are usually the first in on something like this."

"I can't J. I'm his boss. I do anything and it's a lawsuit of managerial abuse waiting to happen. He already did it to the window installer place he used to work for. That manager got fired. My hands are tied. But now you are here, you can sort this out. She'll listen to you. She'll ask him to leave. She's too scared to now."

"She's what?" I almost shouted. This was NOT my Chloe. She was confident, didn't take crap and sometimes abrasive with it. She'd have had no problem telling some asshole to leave.

Mark turned to me again and said "J, things have changed a lot since you left. I don't know exactly what you said to her when you left, but she just crumpled man. She was like a balloon with the air let out. She's a shell of what she was. You say you are damaged -- from where I am sitting it's not a patch on how damaged she is. Go see her, you'll see."

I took a last swig of beer and set the bottle down.

"Mark, you are a piece of work, you know that? Some fucking friend you, to either of us." He looked abashed and looked down and I left the bar without looking back.

I immediately drove up to my old house and knocked on the door. The lights were on and her red Miata was in the driveway, so I knew she was home, but there was no reply. I knocked again, but still no reply, but I did see shadows moving. I walked around the side of the house, looking in through the window. The house looked basically the same, messier and there were some new items in the living room. I was checking them out and then I saw him wandering around. Mark was right, he was a piece of work. Wife beater Shirt, shorts, tattoos over the upper arms, unshaven, wild eyes and he'd obviously been drinking. I stepped back and he didn't see me. I saw him pick up another beer bottle -- there were plenty around the place -- take a swig and mismatch it, and bunch slopped over his shirt and face. He wiped it off with his hand and I heard him say "You can't lock yourself in the bathroom forever, Honey Babe. It's not like I want to rape anyone... I just want... company, you know? You know that. You can't stop going on about that fucking idiot ex-husband of yours. You need company too. We can be nice to each other. Wouldn't that be nice?"

If I thought I was angry before, I was fucking purple now. My ex-wife had locked herself in the bathroom in fear of this disgusting human being. I don't even know why I did what I did next, just that I had to. Whatever she'd done to me, no one deserved to live in fear. I went back around to the front of the house, and praying she'd not changed the locks, tried my old key in the front door. It worked and I thanked the gods.

Then I opened the door and right into a golf club leveled in my direction. Those old Ju-Jitsu reflexes sure do get slower, but they don't go away. I ducked just enough --t he club still hit me but it just nicked me on the top of my head. Just enough to piss me off even more but not enough to slow me down.

I walked in and he mumbled something about home invasion and tried another swing. I was expecting this and I stepping inside his swing, blocking his attempt with my right arm. I then leaned in and head butted him, hard. I felt his nose break and blood spray everywhere, and after he howled and put a hand up to face to comfort his nose, I took the left arm, twisted it a special way and popped his arm out of his socket. He howled again and this time I broke his right collar bone. All of this was eminently recoverable from, but right now he was 100% out of commission and not able to bother me while I dealt with Chloe.

Before I got to that though, I leaned down and grabbed his ear and twisted. He moaned again and shied back, not wanting me to hurt him again.

"Let me explain something to you. The idiot ex-husband is back. And you are gone. You ran into a door and hurt yourself. Fuck, you fell down stairs. I don't care. You are just gone. When I come downstairs again, you are gone or I hurt you and keep on hurting you. Do you understand?"

He nodded without saying anything, the bloody still dripping from his nose.

"If I hear about you harassing another woman, I will be back." His eyes widened at that. "Oh yes, I know all about it. It stops or you'll have no idea when I'll be back. But I will. And I won't take it easy on you next time."

He gurgled something about "Absolutely not" and struggled to get up. I walked towards the stairs and gave it no more thought. I had absolutely assaulted him, intimidated him and put the fear of god into him, an although it was in a good cause, sometimes what I am capable of when driven to it makes even me afraid of myself.

I went out the stairs to the bathroom. I knew which one she'd be in. I was angry and not thinking and instead of doing the smart thing and calling out and letting her know I was here -- god alone knows what she thought was happening downstairs -- I just kicked the damn door open and for the second time that night, walked into a stick attempting to smack my head open.

This time it was the bar rail from the towel holder in the bathroom. It didn't hurt that much but I felt it open a gash. I did grab it and twist it out of Chloe's grasp but by then she had realized who I was.

"OH MY GOD" she shrieked. "J!!! Oh god oh god oh god." She literally collapsed into my arms.

"Is he here? Is he gone?" she wanted to know, shaking and not letting go of me.

"It's ok" I said, stroking her hair, "I asked him to leave. He's gone."

"I can't.. oh my god, you are here. Oh my god. He was so... I didn't'... I just... J, thank god you are here...."

She was just sobbing in my arms. I wanted to make it better for her, but I could still only see her eyes closed in orgasm, as Jim slapped his cock into her. A lot of the anger was gone, but the hurt was still there. As much as I loved her, and I realized I still did, I couldn't be here. It was all still too fresh.

I gathered Chloe up in my arms and took her down stairs, to show her he was gone. True to my word, he was. The front door was still open and there was a trail of blood, but he was gone. I closed and locked the front door.

I sat her down and went and got a tequila shot for her and made her take it. She didn't take her eyes off me the whole time.

She was silent but still shaking. As I gave her the shot she reached up to me and drew me down. I thought she was going to try and kiss me, but she wanted to look at the gash in my head. She took the shot, drowned it in one and then said, "I need to clean that."

She got up, took my hand and took me into the downstairs bathroom. I saw my self in the mirror and I did look a scary sight. The gash in my head had bled down the side, and I was covered in blood on my T-shirt where I had blown out the lodgers nose and it had exploded. I had a nice bruise on my forehead from that too.

Chloe took a towel, wet it and started dabbing at me. I never took my eyes off her as she performed the nurse's duties she was so competent in. She finished, stepped back and said, "I think you'll get away with this. If we were in the ER I'd recommend stitches, but I think in this case it'll be un-necessary. There's going to be a little scaring, but it'll only show up when you get sunburnt, and we both know you never do, don't we?"

She gave me a sympathetic smile and my heart just about exploded right there.

She then sank down next to me, as I sat on the toilet and reached out her arms around my neck.

"I've missed you so much. So much. I just couldn't.... I.... didn't... Oh J..."

She was shaking, crying, happy and just unsure. I let her sit there for a moment, and then gently untangled her from me and stood up.

"Chloe..." I began.

She looked down at the floor and said in a quiet, defeated voice "I know. You won't stay. I know. I don't deserve that anyway."

"Lets go into the living room, we can't talk in here." I said.

I picked her up and we walked back into the living room. She sat on the couch and I on the chair and we looked at each other.

"J" she started, hesitantly, "I know I fucked up. We all fucked up. We've talked about it and we all understand how messed it up it must have been for you. We have no excuse -- we had the stories we built in our minds but, it was just justification for the moment. I don't know what to say, I am so desperately sorry. Is there....is there any hope."

I looked at her and was silent for a while, wondering what I could say. Even the hesitation was enough for her. She looked down and said, "I get it. I just... I just need you to know you were the best thing that ever happened to me. I miss you with every fiber of my being and I'll never be complete or right without you. But I understand."

"Chloe," I said, "You will always be my world. The other half of my heart. But, still, all I see if Jim fucking you. It's just not something I can get out of my head. Every time I look at you, I'd resent you and feel humiliated. I'm not here to be a dick. I'm sorry I was so angry last time, but I don't think you can really blame me."

She looked up briefly and smiled and shook her head. "I deserved it, and worse. And it's nothing I haven't said to myself. We all understand that we fucked up and let the evening get away from us. We should have waited; we should have gotten your take on it. I dunno... we just...." She looked away again.

"Look Chloe, I didn't realize you were in such straights financially. I can help a bit you know. So you won't have to take in lodgers. I mean - it didn't work out here, did it?"

She looked back at me, some hope in her eyes. "I know. I can't believe I did that. I just... had to. I couldn't afford it. To start with, it was nice having someone around, but he just got more and more of a slob and more and more belligerent. He still owes me the last months rent."

"OK, well, no more lodgers, ok?" I said gently. She nodded and bit her lip. She obviously wanted to ask me something.

"J... I.... there has been no one else for me. I will admit I tried again with Jim and Kathy and Mark and Wendy but it... just felt wrong and forced without you. I just had to do something to stop hurting though. Have you....?" The question was now out there.

I just looked at her for a second, nodded and then stood up. It was time to go. I didn't want to get into Amy -- she'd been hurt enough for one night. As I left, Chloe stood at the door watching me leave, and a more miserable human being I don't think I've ever seen. And then I remembered myself in the mirror that night, and amended that thought.

As I left, driving back to Portland, I wondered what I had learned from the evening, and what the future was to bring. I did make a call to Mark and told him the events of the evening, and I recommended that he get over there with Wendy to talk to Chloe and be there for her. I made it clear we were not 'friends', and that I knew of the extra activities they'd tried, but I was calling on behalf of Chloe. She would need them right now. He said "Ah" and left it at that and I ended the call.