Penis Pump Posts Profits for Paul


"Just curious, but how much are you charging for these pumps?"

"Retail is $59.99. Any amount less than that and men will think that they're junk. In order to give my product more credibility, I wanted to stay away from the $19.99 television marketing price of buy one and get one free."

"Good idea," said Joe. "So, lemme ask you this. If I'm standing there naked, how do I use to penis pump at the Nude Day party?"

"That's easy. Just excuse yourself to use the bathroom and take your bathing suit with you," said Paul.

"Then, what's the difference in using the pump over my hand?"

"The pump will maintain a harder erection longer. Your erection done with your hand, will only last, a few minutes after you stop stroking yourself. With my penis pump, you're good for, at least 30 minutes, sometimes longer, depending upon the person. Having pumped myself for so long, my pumps last more than an hour."

"I can't wait to try it, Paul. I can't wait for Nude Day," said Joe.

"Happy Nude Day," said Paul.

"Happy Nude Day," said Joe.

A few weeks later, Nude Day, Joe attended the Nude Day party with his wife and his plastic, perfect, personal, penis pump. A big hit at the party, he was a big hit with his mother-in-law the week before, when she gave him a blowjob, and a week later, with his wife's friend, Vivian, when she fucked him silly. Now, no longer sadly depressed, Joe is constantly and continually smiling.

With his cock now so big and so hard, always at the ready, and with so many women who want him, and so little time, constrained by his wife and under the always watchful and jealous eye of his mother-in-law, one night Joe was returning home from the VFW with his sleeping wife and drunken mother-in-law. He parked his car on the train tracks and watching from a safe distance, his wife and mother-in-law never knew what hit them, when the express train demolished their car. Blaming Paul and Paul's plastic, perfect, personal, penis pump for his troubles, the jury and judge didn't think that a penis pump was an adequate defense and sentenced Joe to life in jail. Wishing he had never heard of Paul's plastic, perfect, personal, penis pump, many of the men in prison were glad that they did.

"Just let me pump my cock up a little bigger and a little harder," said Big Bubba. "Okay, Joe, I'm ready for you. Bend over, bitch."


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