Pet Peeve

So, I will admit, when I first came to Literotica, I was looking for the goods. You know, DA GOOOODZ. Porn, smut, licentious lit! Dirty, sweaty sex served up in the sweet package of a short story. Cheap thrills that last only as long as fingers fly. And did I find that? Hell yes! In spades! But much to my amazement, I also found, lo and behold! Real writers. All the more shocking for an erotic site, real writers of NON-erotica. Gasp! Who knew?

This was not just dirty dabblers, submitting messy fucks of a quality no better than the juvenile scratching on a restroom wall. I found writers of characters that live and breathe. Tellers of tales that walk off the page and whisper their story directly into your ear, touching your heart and leaving their imprint there. I have read stories that have made me tremble, made me cry. Stories that made me break my readers silence and laugh or groan or shout out loud. Stories that excited both my mind and body. Stories that resonate in a way that I know I will never forget them . However...we come now to my pet peeve. The reason for this rant.

Countless times now, I have been on the edge of my seat shivering with the excitement a reader feels when they come across a true gem. Heart beating faster than normal...back of my mind mumbling...oh geez, oh man, oh boy, oh whiz, this is fanfreakintastic, perfection personified, this story is... what... what... whaaatttttt.... INCOMPLETE??!!! When a few more clicks of the mouse confirms my worst fears ,that this is not just a case of a bit of a delay before the next chapter, YEARS have gone by. This story that so caught me and sucked me in...is most definitely going to remain, unfinished. The inevitable tantrum commences. What sin did I commit to be sent to reader hell? Am I a criminal and this is my punishment? Can I sue? For this is surely cruel and unusual punishment! Someone get me the yellow pages, I need a lawyer, ASAP!

Aww, crap! See this?! See what you did?! You got my eye twitching ...again! I have developed facial ticks, people! Facial ticks! (Slaps hand over offending eye and continues) Dear , God, I have been reduced to a one eyed, one handed typing, leg twitching like a crack head in need of a fix, FREAK! I am so marking this down on my list of "What Literotica has done to me". My lawyer might want to see it some day. But I digress.

Let me tell you, I am well and truly sick of being cruelly pimp slapped back to reality by a hand in the shape of a chapter left dangling. I think my husband is also well and truly sick of being witness to the grand purple hissy fit thrown after . I'm a big girl now, I can handle delayed gratification. By all means, tease and torment...make us wait a delicious moment for the next installment of a story that is well worth the wait. But this rant has turned into a plea, ONLY do this with stories that are finished. One never knows, their muse may decide to hibernate at a most inopportune time. Characters may stop talking to the writer, answering with only silence as the writer begs for more. Computers shit the bed, and perhaps due to low balances in bank accounts, take longer than anticipated to fix. By the time the author is back, fingers ready and raring to go, they begin to tap away only to find...the story has died inside them. Words written are hollow or just don't come at all. Been there, done that, didn't buy the t-shirt.

So I am shaming myself in begging, pleading. Getting my knees dirty as I kneel with clasped hands of supplication. Feed us the chapters slowly if that is what you wish, anticipation can make completion so much sweeter. But make sure the story is a finished one before you start to tell it to us. I and my beleaguered husband would be most grateful. As will my nervous computer, who has heard me say one too many times " I swear to God, if this happens one more time, I am chucking this thing out the window!". Thank you to all those who read this to the end. I feel much better. Do you not find crazy rants liberating? I'm off for a smoke and a stiff drink to celebrate this purge. Anyone care to join me?

*FYI- I have smartened up and now check to see if a story is complete....but from time to time, some still slip past me, D'oh!*