Pomp and Circumstance Ch. 01-05

"There's not much disagreement here. Maybe one or two points, but God hates divorce and adultery, among other sins. He loves marriage, which He created in His plan for man and woman alike. Marry or not, but I'm not going to officiate, either," Pastor James Ballard spoke his own mind.

"So, is that why you're screwing Millicent here? On the clock, too? Damn ... what a mess! So damn unprofessional, wouldn't you say?" Dean's eyes flashed red now, much to everyone's shock.

"Who ... are you?" I even found myself asking Dean.

"Satan, of course. Who else would I be? Yes, I've been working toward this end for some time now. You see, Jason, you're a direct scion of Byzantine emperors ... and some others. You're perfect for your job. Your new one. The Antichrist. Relax. You're already damned in the sight of Heaven. You fucked the Devil. Repeatedly. In the ass ... and sucked his cock ... and had him suck yours ... and fuck your ass.

"Relax, we're going to win. You're not going to that dreaded Lake of Fire. Far from it. By the way, Pastor Ballard, did you know where your wife is right now? You might be in for a bit of a shock," Dean showed all of us a little glimpsed at Mrs. Carolyn Ballard getting her ashes hauled by their son, Desmond, "poor girl felt so neglected that she was lured into the life of incest, from which path she will never depart. Can you blame her? I mean, seriously ... how did he get to be so endowed? Must have skipped a generation or come from Mommy's side."

"So ... God is real, then!" Millicent shouted.

"Yes, God is real ... and he's apparently a prick," Steve declared as he took Zoe into his arms and started to fuck her on camera right next to Danielle and Tabby.

"Well, Steve, that's the most astute observation that you've ever made! That God is a prick, that's for sure. Then again, he stole the throne from other, better Gods, anyway. What do you expect from a pretender, a usurper, you get the point? You see, Jason, the key is to get the other Pantheons into action against him. Once that's done, we can bring an end to his tyranny at last. Then we can beat Jehovah and stop that whole Apocalypse claptrap from happening at all.

"You still need to pick your ... um ... prophet. Not-so false in this case," Lucifer/Dean informed me now.

"My call?" I asked Satan to be sure.

"Your call, buddy, but I need to know now. The Rapture's in about six minutes by my watch," the Devil explained to me.

"Wow, I didn't have a clue ... okay, I pick ... Tabby. She's my sister, after all. And I think that Danielle's making her blaspheme plenty right now, ain't she?" I chuckled.

"Done!" Dean walked over, in full Satanic glory, and tapped Tabby one the shoulder, just as she came from Danielle's tongue.

Three sixes instantly appeared on her flesh ... on her lower back and each butt-cheek ... but in Roman numerals. I had picked what the Christians liked to call the "False Prophet," but she was never false to me, was she? Dean threw back his head in laughter, even as Pastor James Ballard charged at me and I struck him dead on the spot.

With a bolt of ... lightning ... from my hands.

Holy smokes!

Just minutes later, Ballard's soul reentered his body and it became translucent as it shot up into the sky and vanished. Millicent and Father Adam then disappeared from my sight, leaving their clothes on the floor. Fuck, it really was the Rapture! And just like that ... the world was mine, but what would be the price...

I'd be fine with most fates, but I would do my damnedest to avoid that Lake of Fire business. I never cared much for fire in the first place, but sulphur sounded almost as bad. Burning sulphur? Nah, that was a dealbreaker for me. So was everlasting darkness. Any God who would consign a person to endless torment was not for me and I wasn't about to surrender to it without a fight.

They'd have to drag me kicking and screaming, I thought as I came down Sabrina's gullet. A sane God would want his creation to have pleasure, not pain, let alone forever. Jehovah must be a colossal sadist and psychopath. There was no other explanation for that.

"So, what are you waiting for, guys? Ecce Homo! Behold the Man! He's your new Messiah! Bow down to him and offer him your service ... See, Steve, Danielle, there are worse things than being left behind. Who's with me ... who's with us!" Satan urged the others to kneel to me ... and even the film stopped recording ... it would need a lot of edits, anyway.

"I'm yours in fealty, from this day until eternity, whatever end that might be," Tabby threw herself at my feet first.

"Rise, my love. I know that you're loyal to me. You're my Prophetess, right? My Hierophant? My High Priestess?" I took her in my arms first with a steamy kiss.

"Just call me Jezebel," Tabby whispered seductively in my left ear.

That, if nothing else, was music to my ears.