tagHumor & SatirePornship Troopers

Pornship Troopers


Gen waited until she couldn’t take the gee-forces any longer before twitching her exo-hand and starting the crash jel. The progress bar was creeping toward zero, and had just passed the sun symbol. In ten minuets, they’d be hitting the ground, and the natives of this planet wouldn’t know what hit them.

“Yi, yi, yi, yi, yi,” came over the com link.

The other girls were trying to pump themselves up. They all knew how important a find this planet was, and the attack lords had only given them three days.

“Just think of it, girls, a planet full of free range men. We’ll be rich!”

Three days. Millions of unguarded men, and only three days. Why couldn’t they have found this planet sooner? Before they had space travel, planetary defense, nukes and missiles? They could have taken their time and rounded up every one of those hairy little critters. Too late. They discovered them too late. They were too advanced. They had to hit and run, and be hightailing it off this rock in three days.

Even the crash jel couldn’t keep her from getting the wind knocked out of her when they hit the denser part of the atmosphere. Outside her cocoon, the attack ship was giving its life to shed velocity. Each layer of the ships skin was slogging off, turning molten before vaporizing, and shedding speed with every fused atom.

The natives would be looking up at the sky now, marveling at the sheets of fire as fifty attack ships became five hundred pods, with a scavenger girl in every one.

“Web in ten…nine…eight…seven…” the web would deploy at zero, and they’d hit the ground at plus ten.

Her pod shattered on impact, shedding enough inertia in its destruction to only draw an ‘oof’ from Gen as her exo-suit absorbed most of what was left. Gen scanned for threats, as the debris sizzled around her, but the web had done its job.

“They’re all over the place,” an excited voice cried.

“I’ve got two already.”

Some kind of car was screeching back and forth in the web. It was metal, but the metal was paper-thin. Gen ripped the entire top off with a single swipe of her top claw, and cursed when she saw the two inside.

“Shit! Females.”

She hit gold in the next car, two young, healthy males. She ran for the next car as she stuffed them into her bag.

“Come quick. I’ve found some kind of holding pen. Biggest thing I’ve ever seen. I have thousands of them here, no tens of thousands. They’re running all over the place. I can’t catch them all by myself!

Orders were coming in fast. Huge mobs of men were concentrated along the beach. Three huge pens had been discovered, each with over ten thousand. Bags were piling up, and every one of them was dangerously over stuffed.

“Watch out, some of the males are armed.”

“The males?”

“Yes, the males! They’re just pellet guns, but they pack a hell of a punch. I’ll bet they’re leaving dents all over my suit,” Yanik said.

“Take the damn things away from them before they hit something,” Gen said.

“What the hell do you think I’m doing?” Yanik said. “Oh no, oh hell.”

“What is it?”

“They hit something, alarms all over the place. Wait, let me see.”

Gen checked her OHV screen, and started heading for Yanik’s position.

“They got my hydraulics, I can’t control anything, I’m going down, I’m going down on my back. Help! Somebody help me. They’re climbing all over my suit and they have those pellet guns.”

“Close your emergency shield. I’m coming as fast as I can, but I’m two clicks away,” Gen said, checking her OHV. No one else was even close.

“I can’t! Nothing works! For Gods sake hurry, they’ve found the latch! It’s opening! Heeelp!”

Gen damped all her governors and pushed her exo beyond its specs as Yanik’s screams echoed in her ears. She was crying for Yanik to hold on, but she knew she wouldn’t get there in time.

Bill let go with a blood curdling rebel yell when the cop’s shotgun blast sent the metal monster crashing to the ground. Half the guys tore into the thing, making sure it would never get up again, the other half started hacking at the huge sack full of captured men. They weren’t having much luck with the sack, but Bill had spotted a latch, and the metal monster was opening.

“Kill that mother fucker.”

“What is it?’

Bill froze when he saw the alien invader. It was a girl. A damn good-looking girl. She was franticly getting her arms out of the machines control straps, with her big blue eyes staring up at him with terror.

“Come on, you,” Bill said gruffly, reaching down his hand.

She squealed, spun around, and finding nowhere to hide, covered her head with her hands. Bill was treated to a perfect view of a perfect ass, with a perfectly hairless pussy right below.

“Would you look at that,” a guy said over Bill’s shoulder.

Bill didn’t need the suggestion. He was looking at the most flawless piece of tail he’d ever seen. The pucker of her ass hole looked more like a tan line than a little brown round. A single, thin line broke the puffy crescent of her pussy, and there wasn’t a hint of a blemish, or even a hair, anywhere.

They all looked in reverent silence at the alien’s rear.

“Hang on, I’m almost there,” Gen yelled into her mike. “Are you still there? Say something.”

“They aren’t doing anything,” Yanik whispered. “They’re just standing there, staring.”

Gen could see the downed exo, and she was right, they were all just staring. “What are they staring at?” Gen said, almost in firing range.

“My ass. They’re all just staring at my ass, like they’ve never seen one before.”

Gen slowed her exo, and almost giggled at the absurdity of sneaking up on the men in a two-ton exo-suit. She was right on top of them before one that was facing her looked up. She fired her goop-gun, and got all of them, except the one that had looked up. He dove into Yanik’s exo unit.

“Got them,” Gen said, scooping the whole mess into her bag, “except the one with you. He doesn’t have a gun, does he?”

“No,” Yanik said. She was grunting, and Gen could hear a lot of crashing around.

“Is everything all right?” Gen peeked into Yanik’s open exo.

“Yeah, just give me a minute,” Yanik said.

Gen started laughing when she saw what was going on inside the exo unit. Yanik was almost upside down, and one of her arms was tangle in her restraining strap. To make matters worse, the man was fighting her.

“I’ll spank you, if you’re that desperate,” Gen chortled.

“He’s stronger than hell,” Yanik said.

“Sure,” Gen said, sarcastically.

Yanik finally got her arm free of the restraining strap, and Gen’s mouth dropped as she watched the battle continue. She really was having a hard time subduing the man. Gen thought it was over when Yanik got a grip on one of his wrists, but he was able to twist his arm free.

“Amazing,” Gen said.

“This sucks,” Yanik said. “I’m getting all sweaty.”

“Don’t break anything. We can get a lot for one that strong.”

“I’m going to break his fucking neck if he doesn’t get his knee out of my…, hold on, I think I’ve got him.”

Gen could see that it was over. Yanik had gotten her legs around his middle, and his face was turning red, as both his hands were on her legs, trying to pry them apart. Now it was just a simple matter of forcing his arms behind his back and putting him in a slavers hold.

“That was exciting,” Gen said, as Yanik dragged him out of the exo.

“Can you believe it? He’s still fighting,” Yanik said.

“I can see that.”

“Oh my gosh, I don’t believe it.”

“What?” Gen said.

“He’s got an erection.” Yanik was displaying the evidence by holding his pants around his penis. “You’re not going to believe the size of this thing.”

Fascinated, Gen watched as Yanik worked his pants down with her free hand. He was huge.

“I want to keep this one,” Yanik said.

“Either I get a turn, or I’m leaving you out here,” Gen said, drooling.

“If they’re all like this…” Yanik said.

“We’re going to each own our own planet,” Gen finished.

The next day the entire attack party was back in space. Not because of any great threat from the blue/green planet, but because their transports were full.

Yanik had thanked her profusely for coming to her rescue, and brought the one she’d captured to Gen’s room.

“I’ve been all day on a new raider suit,” she said, “and I’m worn out. They were trying to make me take one of those purple ones, you know, the ones with the yellow slouches. Can you imagine? I wouldn’t be caught dead in that outfit. Anyway, I thought you might like to see what I was talking about with these males. This is the one I captured.”

Bill had given up trying to act macho with the alien girl. She had looked normal down in that huge robot suit, but as he soon found out, looks can be deceiving. All of these alien girls stood seven foot plus, and they were stronger than hell.

They had stuck a needle into his neck before tossing him into a large cell on the ship, and they all started talking English as soon as they pulled it out.

“Do you understand me?”


“Get in there.”

Now the babe who’d kicked his ass was giving him to the girl who had come to save her.

“I’m Gen,” she said, dragging him into the room.

“”Bill,” he said, extending his hand, “Bill Barksdale.”

She wrinkled her nose in distaste, “No, I don’t like that. Squirmy sounds better, and it describes you too. Hi, squirmy.”

She took his wrist, instead of his hand, and dragged him to the bed.

“Do you want to take your clothes off? I might break them.”

“What? You’re going to let me fuck you?”

“That’s a funny way of putting it,” she said as she shed her clothes.

Bill was undressing as fast as he could, but he was still trying to pull his pants off over his shoes when she was done. She had a bald beaver too, and Bill could the glistening evidence that she was excited.

“Look at you,” she said, frozen in amazement. She recovered quickly and grabbed him behind the balls.

“Easy!” he yelped, grabbing her wrist and trying to double up.

She had him up off the floor, and pulled him down on top of her as she launched herself onto the bed. She was jamming his cock into her with feverish urgency.

“Let go!” Bill said. His yell was somewhat muffled by her large breasts. He was using both hands to try and pry her hand off his equipment.

“Behave,” she said, giving him a sharp swat on the rump, “I have to pinch it off so it won’t go down.”

“It won’t go down,” he hollered, twisting his face out of the suffocating boob. He got her pinkie pried up and was twisting it back.

“Right,” she said.

She roughly pulled his hands out, and somehow got both of his arms behind his back, “Relax, this won’t take long.”

‘Long’ was a relative term. On Earth, fucking for an hour and a half straight would normally be considered ‘long.’ For Gen, it was a ‘quickie.’

They both started to cum at the same time. Bill couldn’t shoot his load, because she had him ‘pinched off,’ and she was so excited by the size of his dick that she didn’t even try to prolong her orgasm. She kept bouncing him between her legs, and marveled at how long it took before his arms and legs started flopping around limply.

“Are they as good as they look?” Yanik said, coming in with another girl.

“Fantastic,” Gen said.

“I’m going to go get one,” Yanik said, excited.

“You can have this one,” Gen said, sitting up. “I’m done.”

Sweat dripped off every part of Bill’s body as he weakly pulled on the alien girls wrist.

“You’re kidding! Already? He must be…, Look at the size of his cock! It’s even bigger.”

“No!!!” Bill moaned as they made the exchange. Yanik’s hand had replaced Gen’s, ‘pinching him off,’ and not a drop of fluid moved in or out of his dick in the exchange.

“Are you going to get one?” Gen asked Yanik’s friend.

“Can’t, the pens are empty.”

“They’ve taken all of them?” Gen asked.

“Every single one. And there are four or five waiting for each one.”

“I’ll admit they’re good, but that means that almost everyone is using them at the same time. How’s that possible?” Gen said.

“We’ve translated something called a web site. Touch any of those blue words and read the story that pops up,” she said, handing her an intercept reader.

“Aw, fuck,” Bill moaned as he saw the blue letters at the top of the thin, flat screen she was holding. “Why the hell did they have to find Literotica?”

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