Prince Gyllen Ch. 13

Business in Gaul had concluded. Nothing else worthy of note occurred that had not already been chronicled beforehand, other than perhaps Gyllen being talked into having sex with a urine-steeped Min in a tucked away corner of the sandy shore.

Gyllen's milky flesh had refused to tan at all during his visit to the beach, though he noticed Min looked to be a somewhat deeper shade of green since they their leave. The Killer Kraken set sail once again due east over the next couple of days along the continent's coastline to the neighbouring country of Sachsen; a nation loosely ruled by a collective of smaller states and tribes. The pirate crew made port some time before noon in a trading town specified by the prince. Gyllen and Min disembarked before catching a cart ride heading further north for a couple gold pieces each (Gyllen paid for both). The prince and the goblin sat side-by-side on a stiff wooden bench, squashed shoulder-to-shoulder amongst their fellow passengers, varying from peasants to merchants. Soon after boarding, the hooves of the horse could be heard clopping and the wheels began to turn, the carriage creaking and rocking as it was pulled along the unstable dirt road.

It was hardly the most agreeable carriage ride the prince had been a part of in his royal career, having exclusively known more spacious coaches growing up which held a maximum of only four people at once, though Min seemed even less keen than him, as was clear by her folded-armed, pouting silence for the first few minutes into the journey while Gyllen's and an unknown farmer's elbows were accidentality nudging into her cheeks for the entirety of the trip from the wagon's constant wobbling.

"Gyl, I've been meanin' t' ask, but where the Hel are ya plannin' on takin' us this time?" She broke the silence, figuring some small talk with her companion would ease her annoyance and pass some of the time.

"Do you think I was just sitting around doing nothing for an entire month while you were preparing our vessel?" He rhetorically replied, his arms and legs uncomfortably cramped together from the lack of free space.

"'Course not! Ya came over like every other day for a sha-"

"Apart from that!" Gyllen interjected before Min could finish. "What I'm trying to say is, I was sending out letters requesting audiences with many esteemed individuals around the world: rulers, philosophers, artists and such. I thought they would make for fascinating experiences while we were travelling abroad. Some of them even replied!"

"Howja even get in touch with folk like that?"

"I have my connections, being a prince and all, even for one quite low on the royal hierarchy as I."

"So we're gonna go 'bout meetin' all these hoity-toity ponces then?"

"Well...um...not exactly..." Gyllen answered, abashed. "Most of the replies were rejections...however, a few were successful! We're heading to see one of those people now: a mage by the name and title of Zorya the Stupendous."

"Can't be that stupendous if I've never hearda 'em..." Min said. "I take it they're more famous locally?"

"Actually, they come from the Pavlova Empire further east, but they've recently taken a position as a professor at a university here in Sachsen for the time being, which is where we're heading now." Gyllen explained. "I'm surprised you don't at least know the name for as well-travelled as you are, Min. Zorya has built up a sizable reputation as both a wise scholar and powerful wizard over the years."

"Funnily enough, I don' keep up with who's who in the education industry." The goblin said. "Shit, man, I learned how t' thimblerig 'fore I learned how t' write me own name!"

"In any case, I thought it would be quite interesting to attend one of their lectures, or even have a chance to sit down and chat with them for a bit."

"Reeeal grand sense of adventure ya got there, Goldie..." Min rolled her red eyes before closing them. "Wake me up on the way back." She added, slumping where she sat and pretending to snore as vexatious as she was able.

Hours passed before the driver announced the wagon had reached Gyllen and Min's desired destination. Both of them anxiously hopped off the crowded cart, yet when Min surveyed the immediate environment, she could see nothing for miles around but plains, trees and hills, save for what resembled a stout, dingy, brick cube of a shed with a rusted iron door encircled by a crooked, gated, metal fence to the side of the path.

"Gyl, are you sure we got off at the right stop? I think even the middle of nowhere's got more goin' on than this joint." She asked the blond, more than perplexed.

"I'm quite positive, Min... or at least I was..." The prince replied, equally puzzled. He turned back to the coachman, catching them just before they were about to depart. "Excuse me, driver, but which direction is the college from here?"

"Vhat do you mean? It ist right over there, Mein Herr." The shabby rein-holder responded in his native inflections, nodding in the direction of the nearby shanty. "Entschuldige but I really must be making tracks. They should be able to ansver any questions you haf inside. Lebewohl!" And with that, the carriage continued its gradual journey before the nonplussed prince could fathom any further questions on the driver's nonsensical remarks.

"Is he havin' a laugh?" The goblin chuckled. "I never went t' college but even I can tell ya that shed would barely pass for an outhouse, never mind a soddin' school!"

"Well, unless you've got a better idea, we might as well check anyway while we're here." Gyllen said, swinging the gate open as it squeaked on its hinges. "Perhaps the exterior is a deliberate deception..."

"What? Like there's a ladder inside goin' down int' a secret underground base or somethin'? Alright then, I'll humour ya." The goblin lazily followed the prince to the outbuilding's door with hands in her pockets. The blond stood with his grip on the handle, but he was hesitant to pull it lest he ended up embarrassing himself with such a wildly incorrect assumption. "After you then, Prince Pussy." Min egged him on, standing by his hip. Gyllen sighed but he opened the ancient-looking door regardless, yet what lay on the other side utterly stunned the pair speechless.

Instead of a small, dark interior, the door opened into a beautiful, boundless garden full of exotic flowers in front of a large, three-storied building of symmetrical architecture and multicoloured masonry with large, round windows of varying diameters scattered about its walls with no logical pattern. Four pointed towers rose from the four corners of the structure with a further six spires arranged in a hexagonal motif reaching out from the roof and even higher into the sky. The construction consisted of bright white, blue, yellow, green and red materials that seemed to shimmer in the light of a pale sun hanging aloft within a cloudless sky. Several smaller, curvilinear hovels and annexes made from similar substances were interspersed about the grounds, making the whole unreal scene resemble a humble, if queer, village which was domineered by a single, colossal chateau.

Dotted about the yard were people of widely differing species: mainly humans with a noticeable number of elves and the odd gnome or two, amongst a scarce number of miscellaneous races, nearly all outfitted in cloaks and robes of differing dyes and styles. Some were leisurely strolling about the grounds or darting in and out of the buildings, others were chatting amongst themselves and a few were seated on the grass and benches, reading through thick books or paper scrolls.

"See, Min, I told you!" Gyllen triumphantly stated as he walked through the doorway and into the fantastical landscape. "Welcome to Ūwilazala Academy! The world's premier institution for sorcerous studies!" He said with all the puffed-up bravado of a tour guide.

"Oohwahwah...?" Min struggled to pronounce the atypical name as she came up behind the prince.

"Ūwilazala." Gyllen repeated with emphasised enunciation as the two made their way closer to the main edifice. "You know, Silfr, my sister, studied here for a time."

"Silfr...is that the really creepy one nobody likes?"

"Why, I wasn't aware you've met her." Gyllen joked, just as they were passing underneath the open archivolted entryway and into a receptionist lobby that appeared to be carved entirely from polished oak. "Now...the only problem is who do I ask to meet our host...?" He pondered, scouting around to see if he could locate a secretary, or the nearest equivalent, to assist them.

"Tsarevich Gyllen of Snjórland, I am presuming?" A nearby voice then called out to him from out of the blue. Gyllen and Min both looked in the direction it had come from to see they were being approached by a positively beaming human possessing a highly androgynous, yet beautiful, set of features. The first thing to catch both pairs of eyes was the hair on the stranger's head; it was a bizarre turquoise tint, unnatural for a human, styled short and smart at the front but large and spiked at the back, with a single beaded dreadlock twirling down the entirety of the left-hand side of their face. Their eyebrows were thin, matching the shade of their hair, and their cheeks, lips, eyelids and long eyelashes were subtly coloured with glittery, white cosmetics.

Had it not been for their accented speech confirming them to be male, both the prince and the goblin would have had a difficult time deciphering the individual's gender from image alone, though they both may have been more inclined to assume they were female from the make-up, softer face and gentle eyes: narrow and burning a strange amber colour. They were a little above Gyllen's height and appeared to between his and Min's age range. Their entire body below the neck was draped in a flamboyant, violet, felt cloak lengthy enough to be skimming against the floor, embroidered with many five-pointed stars in yellow stitching and trimmed with white fur around the sleeves, collar, hem and central break. In their left hand, they carried a silver staff topped with a perfect sapphire orb and six sets of interlocking hoops that jangled harmoniously at the slightest motion.

"Um, yes, that's me." Gyllen answered the person who knew his name, though failed to recognise their face himself. He certainly would have had trouble forgetting someone with a hairdo like that! "Sorry, but...who are you?"

"Are you forgetting the sending of your letter with lovely handwriting? I am Zorya. I am believing you were seeking meeting with I, da?" The personage answered.

"Oh, beg my pardon, Sir Zorya!" Gyllen hastily bowed in respect. "I wasn't clear on your appearance."

"That is being very alright, child." Zorya laughed. "I change presentation with mood all of the time anyway so nobody bother to be keeping track." Gyllen was unsure by what was meant by the vague statement though Min interjected before he had the chance to ask.

"So you're Zorya?" She said, eyeing up the youthful mage. "The way Goldie here was goin' on about ya, I was expectin' some old guy in a long beard and pointy hat. Can't say I'm complainin', mind~"

"Min, stop flirting and show some respect!" Gyllen growled down to his goblin companion.

"I'm jus' sayin' 'hello'!" Min rebutted.

"Is that what it was when we first met?" The prince whispered under his breath.

"It is being fine. I grow weary of formality very fast. Your little friend's inelegant attitude is very refreshing to I." Zorya said without dropping their smile.

"Uh, thanks?" Min replied to the backhanded compliment.

"But how did you know it was me? Or even that we would be here at this moment? I don't recall specifying the time we expected to arrive in the letter." Gyllen asked.

"Oh, very simple. I read position of stars and planets to foretell your arriving. I even also scry with crystal ball and drew cards just to be on safe side." The sorcerer explained.

"Of course...simple..." Gyllen commented, not sure what kind of answer he was expecting.

"Hang on! Are we ignorin' the bleedin' obvious here?" Min said. "How the Hel did ya fit all this into that tiny hut?"

"I am assuming you are referring to entrance, da?" Zorya inquired. "You are seeing, we are not actually inside hut, but rather manufactured pocket dimension separate from regular plane of existence. That door simply is acting as point of access to move between them. Making sense?" The blue-haired mage was only greeted by blank, bewildered stares from the two guests. "...in layman's terms, it is magic door."

"Ooooh! Well, why didn' ya say?" Min exclaimed, now better enlightened. "Why bother with all that hocus pocus though?"

"It is being merely façade to deter would-be trespassers." Zorya answered.

"Our cabbie seemed to know what it was pretty easily." The goblin went on. "Not like there's really anything else out there that stands out."

"Hmm...you are making valid point." The wizard admitted. "I shall bring it up during next council meeting."

"Guess smart doesn' equal common sense, eh, Goldie?" Min made an aside to the blond.

"G-getting back on track, Mr. Zorya..." Gyllen stammered, his mind only recovering from the sudden blast of quantum terminology. "I was hoping we would be able to attend one of your lectures whilst we were visiting."

"Of course! In fact, I was just on my way to give talk on transmutation at this moment. Feel free to be accompanying me there." The professor insisted. "I can be giving you full tour afterwards."

"Oh! We'd be delighted." Gyllen twinkled.

"Oi! Don' lump me in with you, ya dork." The goblin snapped.

"I will be looking for volunteers to assist me in demonstration too." Zorya added. "I am believing you two are being ideal for it, assuming you are willing?"

"Why, it would be an honour, sir!" The prince accepted without qualm.

"Yeah, sure, guess I migh' as well..." Min grudgingly agreed. "Gods know I won' be payin' attention anyway..."

"Horosho!" Zorya gleefully exclaimed.

The celebrity wizard chaperoned the duo through twisting, multi-branched, windowless corridors of irrational, labyrinthian geography, up small, steep ramps and down minor, sharp slopes. Both Gyllen and Min knew they would have had a stressful time finding their way through the establishment on their own, however Zorya seemed confident enough as to where they were heading, making the visitors thankful for meeting the mage when they did.

After an extensive march, the three arrived at and entered the appointed lecture hall. Inside, rows of long desks were stacked high in stepped tiers on one side of the room, designed to hold at least a hundred students but only a sparse dozen or so were in attendance, chattering amongst themselves. On the other end of the room, a semi-circular section of the floor was raised to act as a podium, with a small table placed atop it holding several random items and a large blackboard mounted on the wall behind. Overall, it was an amazingly ordinary classroom compared to the eccentric ordeal required to reach it.

The blond and the redhead helped themselves to a pair of empty seats down in the front row as the revered scholar took centre stage on the platform. The pupils silenced themselves immediately once their teacher made his wordless presence visible. Once salutations had been pleasantly made, Zorya got their afternoon class under way. Some simple spells the academic exhibited included taking a gold goblet from the nearby table and turning it silver or changing a steel sword's solid, upright stability to a flaccid consistency akin to that of a wet noodle via prolonged incantations supplemented by quick waves of the stave. Each spell was accompanied by a long formula chalked up on the blackboard in esoteric script and symbols that were completely undecipherable to the two visitors, though the frantic scribbling of quills on paper could be heard as the undergraduates copied them down. To the prince, the whole display has the air of a conjurer's show at the funfair rather than a talk at a respected university, but he was still nevertheless fascinated.

"And now we shall be moving onto main subject of today's lesson." Zorya announced. "To be better illustrating this, two visitors to school have offered kindly to assist me. Tsarevich Gyllen and Gospozha Min, would you please be joining me in front now?" Gyllen perked up upon hearing his name called and nudged his goblin friend awake from a boredom-induced nap. The prince enthusiastically strode onto the stage while Min sleepily followed with a shamble and a yawn.

"So what ya needin' us to do, prof?" Min asked as she wiped some drool from the corner of her lips with the back of her wrist.

"Just be standing here and relaxing. I shall be doing majority of work." Zorya answered and indicated a spot beside him before turning his focus back onto the pupils. "Up until this point, I have been showing charms exclusively upon inanimate objects, simple rearrangings in composition, but now I will demonstrate the hugely more complex transmutings on living, sentient beings! Be watching carefully now..."

"Wait, what?" Gyllen's keen smile vanished as he flashed a concerned look to the blue-haired mage, regretting that he did not ask for details before consenting to the proposition forthwith.

"Gyl, what kinda mess didja get us into?" Min berated the boy, now fully lucid and alert.

"Oh, it is being quite harmless." Zorya attempted to reassure the duo. "But you may be experiencing...odd sensations."

"If I get stuck with five arms and three legs, I'm shovin' that rod so far up yer arse, ye'll be firing lightning bolts out yer piehole!" The redhead threatened the host.

"P-please cease your worrying." The wizard stammered. "Any and all alterations shall be temporary."

"I suppose we might as well go on..." Gyllen nervously stated.

"Alright then...do yer worst." Min turned her head away from the mage in a huff.

"I will begin with something easy." Zorya pointed his index finger towards Gyllen's head and a small beam of green light fired from the tip. The beam touched his long, golden locks and an emerald colour quickly spread from the point of impact, completely turning his hair a lime hue in a matter of seconds. Mild chuckles could be heard coming from the pupils, but they were nearly drowned out by Min's uncontrollable cackle at the prince's impromptu dye job. Gyllen took a few strands of his long tresses into his digits and held them out before his eyes to find out what everybody else was finding so comical.

"Oh, gods!" He exclaimed in shock. "Green is not my colour! How ghastly!"

"Oi! Is there somethin' wrong wi' green?" The goblin said, her laughter coming to a sudden halt, misinterpreting the prince's comment.

"N-no, Min! I didn't mean it like th-" The former blond tried to excuse himself though shrunk at the goblin's dirty, crimson-eyed glare. "...er...Mr. Zorya! Do you have any spells to use on my friend here?" Gyllen asked the sorcerer, seeking a way to swiftly abort the attempted explanation.

"Hmm...perhaps this one would be proving intriguing..." Zorya aimed an open palm in the orange-haired woman's direction. A soft, white glow emanated from the hand and engulfed the goblin. Min gasped and clenched her eyes shut, as though she was being put under some sort of malevolent hex. She then experienced an uncanny feeling, best recounted as though her stubby limbs were being pulled and stretched by an invisible force. The feeling shortly ceased, and she could hear awed exclamations being made from the onlookers, including Gyllen. She opened one eye, dreading to see what deformed shape she may had been morphed into. At first, it seemed like everything else in the room had lost a few feet in height, but when she raised her second eyelid and looked down upon herself, she saw that she had actually grown taller instead!