Queen Yavara Ch. 54

"A conspiracy."

"What do our spies say about Lord Huntiata?"

"Not much, Your Highness. He never leaves his home."

"Lord Feractian?"

"Never leaves his home."

"Lady Jonias?"

"Never... leaves... her... home."

"Quite the lot of introverts, these infamously-gregarious nobles are, aren't they?!" I snapped, "Damn it, Jonathan, I lean on you for these kinds of things!"

"I'm sorry, Your Highness!"

"Don't apologize; fix it! Knock on every door! Find out where they are meeting, and burn the rats out!" I plucked another cherry, and split it between my teeth, "They'll strike soon. They know they don't have much time."

YAVARA

I flew over Alkandra in the dead of night. Even the bitter winter cold didn't cease the revelry of beasts, who churned through the streets below like insects upon a carcass. I didn't know why I thought of them like that, but I did. The entire city looked like an ant hill, and Castle Alkandra sat atop it all, a gothic shadow that towered above the dark skyscrapers. The stairs leading to it were higher than the roof of any building, and the main doors let out an ominous crimson glow that bathed the city below it in infernal reds.

Instead of flying directly to my tower window, I decided to enter the castle through the main doors. The steps were festooned with the drunk and the drugged, many of whom were in some stage of mindless intercourse. When they saw me, they smiled, but their gaze didn't show any kind of affection; only a glossy awareness of me, and a dark desire. The dim moonlight reflected off their eyes and teeth, giving their grins a demonic glow from their shadowed faces. I could become one with the darkness. Maybe then I would feel some kind of belonging.

I slept with the lowlifes on the steps of the castle. They passed my body around and penetrated me in every hole. I could see their silhouettes against the pale moon, and I could make out the shine of their eyes, but they were otherwise featureless to me. Just darkness, like the night itself was defiling me. I moaned and cried, trapped between muscular bodies, pinned by overbearing weight, pierced by hard organs. Their drunk stink infected my nostrils and coated my flesh, sullying me until I was as filthy as they were. I tasted their delicious foulness, swallowed their meat in my throat, and bucked and heaved in a sinuous dance as my rectum and pussy were filled violently. My flesh was coated with fluids, my hair was matted with it, and the space between my thighs oozed decadently. I descended so far into the primal and carnal void that language left me, and my cries of delight were wordless pleas that all could understand. I almost lost myself in that abyss. For a beautiful moment, I was almost gone. Then the sun rose.

The dawn light crested the eastern horizon. It illuminated the tops of the towers and the entire face of the castle, revealing all the creatures that sinned upon its steps. Like roaches exposed from beneath an upturned rock, the beasts of the night scurried back into the shadows below. I felt no compunction to follow them. I stayed in the light, and endured the sobering reality. It wasn't that I was ashamed of what I'd done, for there was nothing wrong with indulging in animalistic sex with strangers, but it was a very poor substitute for love.

In moments like these, when high emotions and sensations faded from the mind and flesh, the soul counterbalanced the peaks with a depression. I felt it now, a hollowness that ate at me. I felt it quite a lot lately. It was in these moments that two souls could reach out to each other and span the valley of depression, allowing them to cross to the plateau on the other side. I looked beside me. The steps were newly made and uncracked, built of intricately-cut flagstone that made a maze between the pieces. It wasn't the craftsmanship that I was noticing, but what was missing there. Who was missing there. I imagined Elena lying next to me, her body as besmirched as mine was. She was shielding her eyes from the sun and groaning in discontent. Then her eyes connected with mine, and we shared a tired little smile. She would reach out, and I would take her hand, and we would walk exhaustedly up the steps together, and find a soft surface in the dark to replenish ourselves in.

I stared at the empty spot. It didn't have to be Elena. Though I missed her and ached for her every waking moment, this numbness wasn't the void she left in me. It was something else. That person who was missing could've been anyone. It could've been Prestira, Brock or Patricia, but they were where Elena was. Where were Zander, Certiok and the hybrids? Weren't they supposed to be with me? Why was it that they seemed to avoid me at every turn? It was as if I was perpetually behind them in a candlelit hallway. The illumination showed their shadows around the corner, and the stones echoed with their laughter, but when I rounded the corner to join them, there was nothing there.

The hollowness within me grew, caverning out pieces of me until I felt it just beneath my flesh. It was strange; though the emptiness consumed me, it weighed so, so much. I could hardly bring myself to sit upright, but I did. I stood up, turned toward the castle, and walked through the doors alone. I needed to rest. The victorious horde would arrive today, and it would be unbefitting for them to be greeted by a queen who was so defeated. Before I could walk through the threshold, something in my periphery stopped me. In the early morning light, I saw a lone figure racing down the causeway. He was a centaur, a scout by the looks of it. He was galloping at full-tilt.

End of Part Fifteen.