Rag Doll Ch. 03

I was happy to reassure her that from now on she'd be free from his pestering; I'd done better than putting the fear of God in him; I'd put the fear of me in there; I was a lot nearer and much more immediate, so I was confident he'd keep well away from my girl from now on; and if he didn't, well, I might be tempted to take him somewhere remote and, in a spirit of educational endeavour, beat seven shades of shit out of him...

We went back to Judy's place, mother had asked us to be gone until lunchtime, so we had a couple of hours to kill, and Ashley wanted to talk, somewhere more private than a mall or coffee-shop.

When we got inside, Ashley got right to it.

"Nick, you said to mom that you wanted to marry me. How serious were you?"

I looked into her fabulous dark green eyes.

"Princess, I do want to marry you, but not until you're absolutely certain you want to marry me. I know I kind of got backed into a corner by mum when I said it, but it doesn't change the fact that I meant it when I said it. There's only one life I want; a life with you, when you're ready. And, as I never got the chance earlier, I'll ask you now. Ashley Lowry, will you marry me one day?"

Ashley sat silently looking into my eyes, her lips moving slightly as she replayed everything I'd said. Judy fidgeted for a few seconds then blurted out "Say yes, you dumb bitch, or I'm taking him!"

Ashley burst out laughing, and dropped into my lap, pulling me close to her as she kissed me soundly.

"Yes Nicholas Davis, I will marry you! And now, I think I'd like to stand up for a little, my bum's sore, I wonder why?" she inquired archly, one eyebrow raised in query.

Judy raised an eyebrow at her words, grinned, and then laughed .

"Ashley Lowry, I never knew you were such a slut! And with your own brother, too! I was only teasing you about what I had said earlier. You actually let him put that pogo-stick of his in your ass? Oh my God! You're braver than I thought, I mean...!"

Ashley looked at her loftily.

"I love him Judy. I would do anything Nicky asked as long as it didn't involve jail-time or folk-dancing! You should try it sometime..."

Judy grinned again, even wider this time. "What, folk-dancing? OK, but I'd have to kill myself afterwards! And as for the other thing, are you offering me Nick as a try-out? The answer's yes!"

Ashley snorted and smiled sweetly."Now who's the slut, Judy 'I am a huge tramp' Nixon!"

I listened to this byplay with amusement, and a certain amount of embarrassment

"Hello, ladies," I interjected, "just wanted to remind you, I'm still sat right here! Ashley, sweetheart, does it really hurt that bad? I'm sorry Princess, if I'd known...!"

Ashley smiled brightly at me, a great big, phony 'Flight-Attendant' smile.

"No Nicky, it didn't hurt one bit. But if you want to gain some perspective, sort of see things from my point of view, I could always borrow one of Judy's extensive range of truly frightening dildo's and use it on you so you can feel just what I'm feeling right now!"

I blushed, deeply.

"Ah, no thank you, darling, I think I'll pass, if it's all the same to you, and I'm sorry, Princess, we don't have to do it again if it makes you feel like this. I don't want to force anything on you, ever!"

Ashley came round behind me and leaned down to hug me.

"It did hurt just a little, Nicky, but it hurt so good, you know what I mean? We will be doing it again, I like the idea of you forcing things into me, just give me a couple days!" she murmured, and gently nipped my earlobe.

Once again, I grinned so wide all that was holding the top of my head on was my ears! I slipped my arm around her waist and held her close to me, resting my head against her midriff, listening to her heartbeat.

Judy on her bed and looked at me quizzically.

"So Nick, are there any more like you back in England, maybe one I can snag, or are you a one-off?" she asked, a slight smile playing around her lips.

I scratched my head.

"I have two half-brothers; Robert's almost four years younger than me, and Richard's a year younger than him, and you definitely don't want to get mixed-up with those two poisonous little twerps!" I told her, remembering their whining and their attitudes to people, so much like my father's.

"Oh really? Do tell!" she prompted, so I gave her the matinee version.

"Richard and Robert are Barbara's sons, but they're nothing like her; my father made them into younger versions of himself, and I truly believe Barbara had no time for them; I never saw them show or give her any affection or appreciation, or respect; it's like he used her to give him sons, then took them away from her, and I think that's how she felt. But she had me, and I had her, and that was enough for us both. Can we stop talking about this now, please?" I begged her, near tears again, and Judy's little face showed concerned sympathy as Ashley hugged me close, hearing the sadness and guilt in my voice again.

I buried my face in Ashley's midriff and mopped my eyes on her shirt, and Judy reached out and touched my knee.

"I'm sorry Nicky, I didn't think..." she whispered, while I wondered how long this hurt was going to keep pulling me down, how long it would be before I could think of her without turning into a quivering wreck; I wasn't indulging myself, wallowing in my guilt and loss, I was sure of that. Ashley had been on the right track; I just hadn't worked out a way to forgive myself yet, nor did I think I'd earned it, not yet.

I got myself back under control, and apologised to Judy for making her feel uncomfortable in her own home. She came over and hugged me where I sat and said "Nicky, it's OK to mourn, and it's OK to cry, you loved her, and it's only been a few days. Any time you need to cry for her, you should." I hugged her back and thanked her for being there for me as well.

Ashley decided at that point that it was more or less lunchtime, so we should be going, and Judy offered to drop us back. As we walked down the stairs I saw an Olde-English silver Bristol car pull into the driveway, and Dr. Nixon got out. He saw us and waved, and stood waiting for us by that stunning car.

"Hello Ashley, Nick, how are you feeling?" he asked. I told him I felt fine, and that I was free if he wanted to discuss last night at all, but he claimed he was too busy, and that he'd drop by later to check me over. I was only half listening to him; my attention was riveted on that beautiful hand-built aluminium-bodied car, and he noticed my rapt gaze.

"Like her, Nick? He asked me, and I could only nod. "Where did you find a 408 in America?"I asked him softly, my attention still fixed on the car, and he sounded impressed.

"You know what it is?" and I nodded; this car was an English classic and a schoolboy fantasy to drive, and I'd only ever seen one, in the National Motor Museum at Beaulieu Abbey in Hampshire, a mecca for motor-heads the world over.

"She's a 1964 Bristol 408 with the Chrysler of Canada 5.2 litre engine, they only made 83, and you've got one, oh my God!" was all I could say, "I can't believe you drive her around, what if she gets pranged? Is there anyone here who even knows how to shape aluminium body panels for her?"

Dr. Nixon grinned. "Nope, which is why I only drive her after the rush-hour is over; while the Range Rover's off the road, she's my only transport, and the only way I'll be seen in Judy's Prius is after I'm dead, so I have to go careful; I shudder to think what it would cost to fabricate duplicate body panels from scratch! I know about this marque and this model, so normally she only comes out when I can't resist her any more."

"I found her twenty years ago in a car lot in Raleigh, North Carolina, the bodywork and suspension were fine, but the engine and gearbox and torque converter were shot, and the interior was tattered; the dealer didn't know and didn't care what she was, which is why I was able to snap her up. It took me nearly ten years to put her back in shape, and there she is! Want to sit in her?"

I grinned and nodded, and he opened the door for me. The car was an import from England, so right-hand drive, and the sumptuous Connolly leather and beautifully restored and polished walnut interior was more like a gentleman's club than the interior of a car. In its day, this car, hand-built by craftsmen, had been competing with Rolls Royce and Bentley for quality, comfort and prestige, and it still showed; it oozed style and elegance.

I caught Ashley's expression, and eventually managed to tear myself away, reluctantly, and braced myself for questions about Ashley and myself, but none came, so I decided to make the first move.

"Dr. Nixon, I need to have a word with you, is there somewhere we can talk for a few minutes, please? Alone?

He looked at me and nodded, motioning me to follow him into the house while Ashley and Judy stood outside, whispering together as they leaned against Judy's despised Prius. When we got inside, Dr. Nixon motioned me to take a seat.

"So Nick, what can I do for you?" he asked.

"Dr. Nixon, Ashley says you know I'm her brother, well, half-brother. I expect you're wondering what kind of relationship we have?"

He looked at me for a moment, then leaned back in his seat and smiled slightly.

"Actually, no, I think I guessed after yesterday. What do you want me to say? That I disapprove? Speaking as a medical professional, of course I have an opinion, and that opinion is loaded against you. What you're doing is illegal, and by rights I should report you, but, as you've not stated outright what you're doing, technically I'm still unaware, let's leave it that way. My personal opinion is immaterial. However, there's the issue of children. The children of incest have a better than fair chance of inheriting recessive genetic traits that may well end up expressing themselves down through their own families."

"I can't in all honesty condone what you're doing, if only for the sake of the children you may have, and the burden you could conceivably impose on them. However, I think you're both old enough to understand what you're doing and it's not my place to offer opinion on what you do as consenting adults. My medical opinion you've just heard, anything else is not relevant."

I nodded, waiting for him to continue.

"Ashley looks to be happy, for the first time in a long time. I know what happened to her, Judy keeps me fully up-to-date, and my concern for her was always that she'd never really addressed what happened to her, or found an outlet to express her feelings about it. I do see a difference in her now, so perhaps now she's found that outlet in you, which is no bad thing."

"That you're half-siblings is always going to be a matter of concern, for the reasons I mentioned earlier, but that's for the two of you to resolve. I see far more bizarre and outlandish goings-on in some of the more...rural areas of the state, believe me! Your relationship hardly raises a tick on the Weird-O-Meter compared to what I've seen out in the wilds of this great state. I guess what I'm really saying is that your affairs are yours, it's not my place to judge, and I'm not going to."

"I would however urge you to carefully consider what you're doing if the subject of children raises its head. Close monitoring of any pregnancy will be a must, and early testing to ensure no genetic anomalies are being expressed is highly indicated. I would recommend you both come and talk to me before you do embark on a pregnancy, just so we all know where this could go, and if you do go ahead, I would definitely urge an amniocentesis and periodic MRI scans. The clinic where I work has advanced pre-natal care facilities and I can make them available to you if and when you need them. There is a good chance that your children will be unaffected, but there's also a definite possibility that they could, it's a coin-toss, so think carefully."

"As you are currently under my care, any conversations I have with you, or confidences you ask me to keep are covered by privilege, so I can't and won't discuss this with anyone without your express consent. I hope I've opened your eyes to the possible consequences of your relationship with Ashley. Personally, I hope you and Ashley succeed; I like her a lot, and she needs the kind of stability a strong relationship can offer."

He smiled and stood up.

"Now I think we've left Ashley alone too long out there with Judy, never a good idea! Shall we rejoin them?"

We left together, my mind at ease now. Judy's dad was a regular human-type person when he wasn't wearing his 'Dr. Nixon' hat. He'd given me some food for thought, while clearly stating his intention to stay out of our business, so I could put Ashley's fears to bed too. There was no more reason to hide the truth from mother, but the rest of the community certainly didn't need to know.

As I was climbing into the car a thought struck me, and I looked for Dr. Nixon again.

"Dr. Nixon, as I'm here, are you sure you don't want to check me over again, or..."

He actually blushed. "Actually, Nick, I'm really quite busy, but I'll be over this evening, if you could let your mother know I'll be there about Seven o'clock or thereabouts...!"

I thanked him, watching him still blushing furiously, and told him I'd look forward to his visit, and with that we pulled away.

Judy was grinning like a chimp, so I asked her what had got her so happy.

"He's so full of it, he's not busy, he's not working today, he'll be in his study watching 'Rocket Monkeys' on Nickelodeon all afternoon! He just wants to make sure he has another chance to meet up with your mom!"

When we arrived back home, Ashley dragged Judy in with her, much against her will; mother had really put the wind up her, and she didn't relish spending any time anywhere near her just now, but Ashley insisted; she wanted her oldest friend with her right now, and Judy gave in.

Lunch wasn't strained or particularly atmospheric; mother was friendly and gracious, spooking Judy even further; she sat on the edge of her seat the whole time. I didn't know what she thought, that mother was suddenly going to reach over and stab her with a fork, or gouge her eye out with a spoon or something, but she was visibly relieved when lunch was over and we cleared-up and returned to the living room. Judy noted where mother sat, then chose the furthest point from her; I had to hide a grin, poor Judy really was spooked bad!

Mother composed herself, obviously gathering her thoughts, and began.

"Nicky, Ashley, I've been thinking about what happened this morning, about the two of you, and I need you both to tell me where this is going, what you think the future holds. Ashley?"

Ashley glanced at me, and started.

"Mom, we didn't mean for this to happen, and Nicky didn't set out to seduce me, as you put it; if anything, I jumped him, and he gave me umpteen chances to back out and not have to be doing this someday. I saw him, and I saw my future, I can't put it any other way. I love him, and I will marry him; he's already asked me, and I've accepted. Oh, we're not getting married tomorrow, Nick wants to get a job first, get settled-in, but eventually we will get married, have our own home, babies, everything."

"Mom, I know you think this is wrong, but it feels right to me, Nicky makes me feel happy all the way through, I believe in him, and I believe he's sincere when he tells me he loves me."

Mother nodded all through this, then cocked an eyebrow at me.

"And you, Nicky, what do you have to say?"

I swallowed, and took-up where Ashley left off.

"I love Ashley, mum, I think I loved her from the first time I actually saw at her, and when I did, it was like something clicked-on in my head, and I knew she was the one. I don't want to break up this family, and we don't have to; like you said, we can't be your kids in here and a couple out there, so we'll be one thing all the time, just Ashley and Nick, a couple, but you'll always be my mum, and we're still going to be your children, that will never change."

"I want to marry Ashley, I know from deep down inside that she's the one I want, and I promise I'll always make her day end with a smile; I won't promise we won't fight, I can't do that, but I do promise we'll never end the day in anger. That's one thing I learned from Barbara; even when I made her mad enough to send me to my room, she still came and wished me goodnight and told me she still loved me, and I would tell her I was sorry."

"Life's too short, mum, and you may not ever get the chance to say sorry, so I always say it first. I'm sorry, mum, for not telling you sooner, and I apologise for hurting you, but I love Ashley, and I want her to be my wife; I know it seems too short a time, but it isn't, not for me; I knew from the moment I saw her, and nothing's going to change that. I will always love her, and I will never make her cry, I swear to you."

Mother looked at me, and back to Ashley, then down at her hands folded in her lap.

"This is not what I dreamed for you Ashley. I had so much planned for you. I know that things happened to take all that away, and I learned to live with what I could salvage, but I never thought I'd be giving you away to my son, but..."

"But mom, you said....!" burst out Ashley, but mother held her hand up to silence her.

"No, baby, let me finish. What I was going to say was, I'm glad for you, because you're happy, at last. Your happiness is the only thing I've ever wanted. All I wanted was for us to be a strong, close-knit family, but I didn't want it at any price, including breaking your heart or driving you away because of what I thought was right or wrong. You love Nicky, and I can see that he loves you. He's an honest, compassionate, loving young man; he'll be a strong arm for you to lean on."

"My children need to be happy; too much has happened to them already in their short lives for me to take that away from them, and either I fight against this because of what people say is wrong, and lose them, or I accept it because it's right for my children. I have to accept that you both are together, that you love each other, and that you want to make a life together. If you're both happy together, I don't dare come between you and risk losing both of you. I lost my little boy for so long, I can't lose him again just when I've got him back."

"So this is what we'll have to do. You'll both live here, my daughter and her fiancé, we'll turn Nicky's room into your room, we'll move some things around to give you a bit more room in there. What I said earlier, about being...together, in front of me, forget that; if you can't be together and be in love in your own home, why bother living there? And Nicky, please, just keep calling me mum; as far as the world knows or cares, you're my son-in-law to-be, so it'll seem normal. In due course, you may decide to get a place of your own, get married and have a family, I'll be there for you both then as well. Did I miss anything?"

I looked on in open-mouthed astonishment. Mother had just given me the biggest, most desired gift of all, Ashley, without batting an eyelid. Ashley was in a similar state; we'd expected hostility, some backtracking and negotiation, but this, this was just...incredible. Ashley was the first to move, hugging her mom tightly, tears on her cheeks while mother smiled indulgently, even though I could see in her eyes what this decision was really costing her. I hung back until Ashley let me near mother, but I gave up waiting and squeezed them both, mother again grinning as I bear-hugged my family.

"Nick...Nick...can't breathe"! laughed mother, and I released them, un-squashing Ashley in the process, who grinned and jabbed me with her elbow as payback for nearly flattening her.