Raw Ch. 08

"The same house where I went for the dungeon party?"

"Yes. We had private parties on the weekends, which I didn't always participate in because I had returned to bouncing at the club. It helped make ends meet, but it was no longer enough. I was in my late twenties, and I wanted to settle down. I needed a change. So I found a job at a high school teaching math and moved to Wheaton.

"I had wanted to stay fresh in the scene, but that was hard outside of the city not knowing anyone. I had been going with Jesse to the private club in Chicago where we took you. I hadn't been in awhile, but I got a letter from Jesse that he was going back to France, and I was free to crash at his place if I was ever in the city. I took him up on that offer many times just so I could visit my old stomping grounds."

"That was very nice of him." And that was very hard for me to say sincerely. 'Nice' and 'Jesse' were two words I wouldn't normally use in the same sentence. But I couldn't tell Malcolm that. And I cringed internally at that thought. I guess there was a secret I was keeping from him.

"I met a lady there, at the club, and she had been looking for a dominant partner. It was platonic at first, and she'd said she wanted it that way. Nurturing each other in our own roles. But eventually, nature took its own course. I wanted it to be more than just in the scene. I wanted to see her more, to develop a relationship outside of the club or Jesse's basement. To see if we could be more than just a kinky couple going through the motions. That's when she said was engaged to be married."

Ouch! I imagined my grimace reflected Malcolm's as he rubbed his hand over his face and sighed. And I thought men could be indifferent to women's feelings.

"He was out of the country on business, and she was basically using me to keep in shape—her words not mine—for when he returned since he was also a Dom. I ended it and never saw her again. By that time, I'd met your brother. I refused to find another partner for myself. Instead, I took Drake under my wing. This worked out wonderfully when he hooked up with Daphne, whom I'd already known. Drake needed someone to care for, and Daphne needed special care.

"I had known her previous partner, a real ass and a sad example of a dominant male. From those I knew within his circle in the scene, her ex moved out to California. He lost his temper on the set for a kinky porno film and broke a woman's arm and jaw. While he was serving his time, a couple of inmates found out and beat him up. They broke his arm and jaw, too. Karma."

I stared into my empty glass, shocked that I'd drunk it all without realizing it. But I was even more surprised that Malcolm had opened up like a window on the first day of spring. I'd imagined he'd spent one summer abroad and picked up the desire to be a Dom online like I had. How wrong I'd been.

Malcolm glanced at his watch and chugged the rest of his beer. "We should get going."

I felt a little weary with all of the information he'd unloaded onto me. But I'd asked for it. And I was glad that I knew now. Granted, I had no idea the price I'd have to pay for it—both on this trip and in the future—but it was better this way. No more secrets. Except having to tell him about my experience with Jesse. But there was no need to burden him with that this weekend.

I gathered my coat, scarf, and purse and followed him out of the tavern, waving my thanks to the bartender who seemed happy to have had some patrons this late at night.

We were walking up the ramp to the plane when I remembered a question I had thought of during Malcolm's storytelling.

"Your lady friend, the one who took you to France? What was her name?"

He stopped at the door to the plane and let me enter first. "Her name? It was Juliet."

~ H