Razor Ch. 10

A few hours of rest and a simple meal of soup and toast later we were sitting in the kitchen again, side by side, my shoulder softly brushing his arm.

"Why did you come back?" I whispered and looked at him as he pushed his hands through his hair, clearly either nervous or frustrated.

"You're going to think I'm mad, but you've been sort of stuck inside of me for a while now... and to tell you the truth I could feel it, in here." he said softly and pointed to his chest and then to his head "You were afraid, in danger. And I turned back, running, fast."

I didn't know what to say. Another strange mental or spiritual connection, another close save.

"Thank you!" I whispered to him and to whatever or whoever more was out there, who kept sending people to save me and who tried to teach me lessons about life and myself, some of which I was reluctantly beginning to understand.

He stood up, pulled me into his arms and held me, that new fragile me, close. And I breathed him in and slowly realized that he was also, as he had said it, inside of me. He looked, smelled, sounded and felt just right. He didn't calm me, but I was no longer sure I needed calming. He got me thinking in new paths by gently nudging me with a soft word here and there, gently enough that I almost didn't notice. Somehow it seemed like he got me, that he could follow the roads my thoughts travelled.

"I've got a song for you, you know." he said in a whisper and pulled me with him into the living room and down into the big, hardly ever used sofa. He made sure I landed in his lap where he cradled me close again and then he started singing.

"I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever

I'll be there for you through it all

Even if saving you sends me to heaven"

"My guardian angel" I whispered when he ended with a last sigh against my short hair.

I pushed myself up and turned around so I could look him in the eyes properly, finally ending up straddling him. I put my hands on his shoulders and slowly took him in, my every sense concentrated on his being. He was tired but filled with energy; soft, golden energy. Perhaps I would tell him someday that he really was a golden boy.

"I've got a song for you too." I whispered before I started singing, my eyes fully focused on his face and his eyes.

"When I was younger I saw my daddy cry

And curse at the wind.

He broke his own heart and I watched

As he tried to reassemble it.

And my momma swore

That she would never let herself forget.

And that was the day that I promised

I'd never sing of love if it does not exist.

But darling,

You are the only exception.

You are the only exception.

You are the only exception.

You are the only exception."

I whispered the last sentence and then I leaned in and kissed him, softly, gently and lovingly. The heat that spread in my body seemed to originate from my heart this time and I knew that my words were true. He was the exception. He was what dreams were made of. He was my lust, my love and my life.

"I love you, Simon." I whispered softly in his ear.

It seemed that the world shook then, as if my words started a shift in some delicate universal balance, but I realized it was my rock, my heart, my Simon that shook from the feelings he held inside.

"I love you too Mary," he whispered "more than you will ever know."

My mind spent a couple of seconds analyzing the possibility of creating a formula to calculate the amount of love a person held for another person and then I heard Simon laugh softly.

"Don't overthink it." he whispered "Just feel it, breathe it, live it!"

And then he kissed me until there were no thoughts left in my mind except one. Love lifts us up where we belong.