Real Story of Mrs Claus & the Elves


Forgetting about himself and his reputation, how could he disappoint all of those children for 2 hours, an hour, okay, 15 minutes, more realistically 3 minutes of orgasmic bliss with a woman, no doubt, someone else's wife? He couldn't be a home wrecker. It wouldn't be worth it. He could never do that to the children. He could never ruin his beloved Christmas. Besides, but for his own hand, in his condition, he could never get and maintain an erection long enough and hard enough to satisfy any woman's pussy.

* * * * *

He could write a book of all the things he's seen when unexpectedly coming down someone's chimney. Knowing that it's Christmas and he'd be visiting, the least that people could do is to have a chimney sweep clean their chimney. Albeit just once a year, covered in soot from head to toe, his dry cleaning bill is a nuisance expense.

With their children upstairs asleep in their beds, he couldn't count the number of times he's seen a woman in her revealing, sexy nightgown. He couldn't count the number of times that he saw a man and a woman, a man and a man, and a woman and a woman naked while having sex in front of the Christmas tree. If that wasn't embarrassing enough for him and, perhaps for them too, then there were those times that he caught wives cheating on their husbands while their spouses were working on Christmas Eve.

How dare they cheat on their spouses? How could they do that to their children? How could they violate Christmas with adulterous sex? Immediately, only leaving their children in the good list, he crossed them out on his good girl list and wrote their mothers on the bad girl list.

Bribing him with money, bribing him with sex, and bribing him with cookies, he's seen lots of naked women who had bigger tits and better bodies than Mary having sex with men who weren't their husbands. Yet, in the way that he saved himself only for his wife, he was hoping that she'd save herself only for him. Alas, it's all ruined now. Nothing is the same. With his wife wanting other men, younger men, albeit elves, and with his wife forsaking him because he can no longer get and maintain an erection, he felt like such a loser.

"The elves! Those frigging, little elves! It's all about those damn, sneaky Elves! Sons of bitches, dirty frigging bastards. How dare they lust over my wife? How dare she lust over them?"

He's not stupid. He's not blind. He's seen how she looks at them and touches their little heads, their little shoulders, and their small arms. He's seen how she slaps them on their asses when they've had a good day with toy production. He's seen her rubbing their knees and they're thighs when sitting together with them on their tea break. He's even seen her holding hands with them. What else has she already done with the elves that he doesn't know? Has she already fucked them? Has she already sucked them? Have they already seen his wife naked? How dare they? How dare she?

* * * * *

In the way that he knows the names of his reindeer, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Blitzen, and Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer, she knows the elves all by name when he can't tell one from the other. Abraham, Bartholomew, Charlie, Daniel, Frank, George, Henry, Mark, Paul, Ralph, Tom, and Walter, the elves all look the same to him. Seriously, why would any woman in her right mind what to have sex with an elf? In his line of work, no doubt, if he put the word out, she could have sex with any celebrity. Brad Pitt or George Clooney would, no doubt, love to bed Mrs. Claus while knowing that she was just a whisper away to them receiving their Christmas wishes whatever those may be.

"They're elves, God damn it, just elves. They're frigging, little elves. They're here to work, not to have sex, especially with my wife. They don't deserve to have sex. Let them go find nymphs to have sex with when not working and on the clock."

Undressing her with their beady, little eyes, he sees how they look at her. Perhaps because her sexy ass is nearly at their eye level, he's seen them staring at her round, firm ass as if her cheeks were two big rump roasts and they were hungry to eat her. He's watch them wiggle their little fingers for her to lean her ear down to their mouths. As if they have private jokes, he's watched them laughing while looking over at him.

"Ho! Ho! Ho! What's so fucking funny? You're just a fucking elf," said Santa not loud enough for his elves to hear. "How's that for funny?"

Granted, he's been unable to be a man of late. Somehow the old pole just won't go north anymore, if you know what I mean. Moreover the old pole is more the south pole than the north pole and no longer a stiff pole but more of a bent twig. A shocking eye opener to see, he's seen the elves in the shower. A happy lot and no wonder why, all of them have bigger poles than he does. Rumored that black men have the biggest cocks, it's the elves that can claim that manly title even though they really aren't human. The elves are packing wood, a virtual Christmas tree trunk in their velvet pants and hardwood that goes all the way down their leg to their shoes. Is it any wonder why elves wear pointy toed shoes?

* * * * *

Diagnosed with diabetes and high blood pressure, the prescription medication that his doctor put him on to save his life makes sexual matters even worse for him. With the blood pressure and drugs for diabetes that he takes, inhibiting his erections, the doctor prescribed Cialis before prescribing Andro-gel, a testosterone supplement. Now he takes both Cialis and Andro-gel whenever the mood strikes Mrs. Claus which seemingly is all the time.

"Fuck me Santa. Fuck me. Fuck me Santa. Fuck me."

The woman is insatiable. She's turned into such a sexy slut and now that she wants an elven gangbang, she's become a wicked whore. Yet, in his failed attempts to sexually satisfy his wife, perhaps he's doing something wrong. While the Andro-gel helps him look younger and feel more energetic, as if he could hit a homerun over the Green Monster and right out of Fenway Park, the Cialis doesn't work.

He's read the box and he's seen the commercials. He faithful rubs his Andro-gel over his shoulders daily and takes the Cialis whenever Mrs. Claus is feeling especially randy. Just as in the commercials, he has the elves set two bathtubs outside in the cold. Averting his eyes while she removes her robe to climb in her tub naked, she watches him climb in his tub naked but nothing ever happens. Maybe the drugs don't work or maybe his libido is too far gone south that his pole will never go north again.

"Hey! You elves get back to work. Get away from those windows. Give Mrs. Claus some privacy."

God damn elves always watching her removing her robe to climb in the bathtub naked. He can't count how many times they'd seen her naked. With the elves always watching her from the workshop when they're in their respective bathtubs outside in the snow, it makes him wonder if Mary is deliberately flashing them. Maybe, too cold outside, they should move the bathtubs indoors. Yeah, being that it's so cold here, maybe the bathtubs need to be indoors for the Cialis to work. Now that he thinks of it, there's never any snow in the Cialis commercials.

* * * * *

Relenting to her wish, giving his wife what she so wanted and what she so needed, Santa caved.

"Okay Mary. I'm giving you your Christmas wish. You may have adulterous sex with the elves," he said to his wife. "Merry Christmas. Ho! Ho! Ho!"

Now every time he uttered Ho, Ho, Ho! He couldn't but think of his wife being a ho, ho, ho."

"Oh thank you Nick. Thank you, thank you, and thank you," she said she said giving him a big, wet kiss. I'm so very happy. I can't wait to fuck and suck all of my little men."

"I do have one condition," said Santa.

"What? Anything. Ask me anything and I'll agree to it. What's your condition Santa?" As if he was one of the elves, she gave him a naughty look. "I bet I know what it is," she said.

"I bet you don't," he said.

"You want to have sex with my mother, don't you? You've always been sexually attracted to your mother-in-law, haven't you? You want to fuck Betty White. Ever since my father, George Burns died, you've always wanted Betty White to suck you," she said with a big smile as if pleased with herself that she believed she was correct in knowing what Santa so wanted as his one condition and what he so wanted for Christmas.

"Sorry Mary. No. Just because your mother is a movie star, a big TV celebrity, and has big breasts, I've never been sexually attracted to her. I'd never have sex with your mother," he said. "Being that she's your mother and your blood, that's just nasty."

"Then, what's your condition?" She looked at him with curiosity.

He looked at her looking at him.

"Well, um..."

"C'mon Santa. Out with it," said Mary. "Tell me. What's your condition? Let's hear it."

"I want to watch," he said turning as red as his red suit.

"You want to watch? Watch what?"

"I want to be in the bedroom with you and the elves while they kiss you, touch you, feel you, fondle you, caress you, and strip you naked. I want to watch the elves fucking you while you suck them," he said. "Don't worry, I'll sit quietly in the corner. I won't make a sound."

"Seriously?" Mary looked at her husband as if seeing him for the first time. "You want to watch me sucking and fucking the elves?"

"Yes," he said with his face turning as red as his suspenders.

"And it won't upset you to watch the elves gangbang me?"

"No, not at all," said Santa.

"And it won't upset you to watch the elves giving me a cum bath?"

"On the contrary, I'd love to see your hair, face, and big breasts covered by elven cum," said Santa.

"Santa, you dirty old man. I never knew you had that in you," said Mary with her own version of Santa's laugh, "Ha! Ha! Ha!"

"It would be exciting to watch the elves having their sexual way with your naked body," said Santa.

"Okay, I can agree to that," she said, "but I have a condition of my own."

"And what's that?"

Santa looked at his wife with sexual excitement knowing that she was about to pull a twelve men train. Albeit little men in stature but huge in penis size, watching his wife being gangbanged and given a cum bath would be a sexy sight to see.

"I want you to videotape it all so that we can watch the sexual orgy in the privacy of our bedroom later and give you pillow talk while I suck your cock," she said giving him a sexy look. "Ha! Ha! Ha!"

"Okay," said Santa. Maybe after watching the video of Mrs. Claus with the elves, maybe after some hot pillow talk about how she felt doing what to which elf, and maybe after she sucked his cock, he'd reinstate her on the good girl list, the very good girl list, indeed. "Yes, I agree to that."

That night, 'twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring except for the elves. With stockings hung by the chimney in hopes that St. Nick would soon be there, instead, Santa watched his wife gangbanged in his big bed by twelve elves with room to spare. Masturbating, masturbating, and masturbating, Santa watched his wife being gangbanged while masturbating himself. Licking her pussy and banging his wife, she had a great Christmas with twelve horny elves.

Abraham, Bartholomew, Charlie, Daniel, Frank, George, Henry, Mark, Paul, Ralph, Tom, and Walter stripped naked and climbed over Mrs. Claus as if she was a smaller version of Gulliver in Gulliver's Travels. Going from one to the other and to another, Mrs. Claus jerked them, sucked them, and fucked them while they licked, sucked her, and banged her.

"Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night."


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