Rear Window Homage

'Jeff, I want to thank you for letting me do this, and for the way you have made me feel this evening. You have been fabulous.'

She stood and moved over to me, squatted beside the chair and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I could smell her perfume and as she moved back from the kiss she paused and we looked into each other's eyes. I felt my heart flip and suddenly this wild thought flashed into my head that all I had to do was move a little closer and kiss her, but I just coughed and said you're welcome and it had been an enjoyable pleasure. She dipped her head once more and pecked me again on the cheek. She wheeled me to the wet room and I was now getting much better at sorting this out by myself. I could feel myself healing now and the collar bone seemed to be getting much easier.

Paula wheeled me into the bedroom and helped me off with my t-shirt and then pulled off the sweat pants. Needless to say being put to bed by Paula was very different to being put to bed by Paul. I had a definite erection which Paula could not have failed to notice. She pulled the cover up and leant forward to give me one more kiss on the cheek.

'Thanks Jeff, you are wonderful, do you know that?'

She left the room leaving me to think about the sight of her small uncontained breasts through the vee of her dress as she had lent over me.

The next morning Paul woke me with the usual cup of coffee dressed in his work tunic and trousers. There was no sign of Paula from the previous evening. The first hurdle was to get washed. I was moving much more freely now and managed to walk from the chair to the stool. I still didn't trust myself to wash properly so Paul took the cloth. Something had changed after yesterday and the washing still felt as good as ever, but I felt no reaction as I had in previous days. All I could think of was that I wished it was Paula doing the washing.

We sat and drank coffee and watched what was happening outside the windows. The singer was practising and the guy in the office drew the blinds one more time.

'Paul, do you mind me asking you some questions about you?'

'No, if I'll answer what I can.'

'Do you prefer living as Paul or Paula?'

'Easy one,' he said, 'both. I like my professional life to be as Paul and my after work I like to become Paula. It would make it difficult to work as Paula unless I wanted to transition completely and I don't want to do that, at least not at the moment.'

'So you, still have, you know...'

He laughed, 'Yes, Jeff, I have a penis, and it still works, I think that was your next question.'

I turned red and said, 'I'm sorry.'

'Don't worry, I would not answer these questions for everyone, but I think I can trust you, so I will. I don't want to lose my penis; I enjoy it for giving and receiving pleasure.'

I went a deeper shade of red. Paul didn't seem to notice.

'Paul, if Paula wants to visit again she'll be perfectly welcome to, any time. I liked her company last night.'

This time, he can't have missed the blush that seemed to cover me.

He smiled and looked me in the eyes, 'Jeff, that's nice, I think she would like that a lot.'

Paula did indeed appear that night; she was dressed casually this time in tight jeans, a white fitted shirt and short boots. Her hair was in a pony tail but this time tied high on the head and with a bright red scrunchie holding it in place. Her makeup was light but still managed to highlight her eyes and those kissable lips. I couldn't now think of her lips without mentally adding the word kissable to them.

We had a nice evening, Paula cooked pasta and I had half a bottle of Chianti and Paula had a glass. Getting to bed was getting easier as well, I could now get onto the bed myself but Paula still had to slip off my sweat pants. She pulled up the covers and lent forwards to give me a kiss. It seemed natural for Paula to do this. This time though she hesitated for a heartbeat and then kissed me on the lips. The touch of her lips on mine was electrifying. She pulled back and anxiously scanned my face, fearing she had gone too far. I smiled up at her raised my head and kissed her on the lips.

I said 'G'night Paula,' and settled down happily.

'Goodnight Jeff, sweet dreams.'

In the morning I felt better than I had since before the accident. I managed to roll myself over and get from the bed to the wheelchair without falling over. Real progress I thought.

The next two days passed in the same way. Paul looked after me by day and Paula appeared in the evening. I was definitely making great strides and was getting more mobile. I was still heavily dependent on Paul though but I could see a time when I wouldn't need him as a carer and that made me feel miserable.

Lisa had texted that she was going to drop round the following evening and when I told Paul he seemed happy enough but there was something bothering him.

'What is it? I thought you liked Lisa, I even thought you fancied her.'

He laughed and said, 'I don't fancy her, but she is the kind of woman I would like to be, well not actually be, but she is so funny and beautiful and full of energy.'

I stared at him and said without thinking, 'If it was a choice between Paula and Lisa, I would choose Paula every time.'

Paul stood stock still and said very carefully, 'Jeff, be careful what you say. You should only say things you really mean.'

I looked him n the eyes and said, 'I mean it, and I will show you, why doesn't Paula meet Lisa tomorrow night?'

'You can't be serious, Jeff.'

'I am serious, I would be proud to be seen with Paula, anywhere, with anyone.' I was talking wildly but I knew I meant it.

Paul looked long and hard at me and said, 'OK, but I warn you Jeff, you have more to lose than me.'

Later that night after we had finished dinner at the table, and Paula was about to clear away, I reached over and took her hand. She looked at my hand holding hers and then back to me.

'Jeff, please be sensible. You can't mean this.'

'I pulled her over towards me, 'Paula, will you please kiss me?'

She hesitated and then dropped my hand and ran to her room. If I could have I would have kicked myself. You stupid, lame brained idiot, numb skull, jackass, fool. I called myself every name under the sun.

I managed to get myself to the toilet and then into bed by myself. I would have cheered if it weren't for what had happened earlier.

I had turned the lights off and had settled down when I heard the door open and a chink of light flashed as the door was closed. I felt the covers lifted and Paula slipped in beside me. Oh my God, I thought, this is it.

'Jeff, do you still want that kiss?'

'Oh yes, I do.'

She covered my lips with hers and she pushed her tongue past my lips. I kissed her back and her hands went round my head and we mashed our lips together. She broke the kiss, sat up straight and lifted off her short nightdress and placed my hands on her breasts. They felt small but the nipples hardened immediately under my touch. She bent down to kiss me again and my tongue this time pushed past her lips. Tongues fought a duel as I continued to play with her nipples.

She moaned as I tweaked her nipple and that caused her to raise up the bed and she pushed her right nipple into my mouth. I swirled my tongue around the now granite hard nipple and nipped it with my teeth. She moaned and transferred the other nipple to my mouth. I gave it the same treatment and she sought out my nipples and rolled and tweaked them between her fingers. I moaned this time and I felt her nip the nipple with her fingernails. She raised herself up and I could sense her looking down at me.

'Are you sure you want this, Jeff? You know what I am and what I've got don't you?'

I answered by pulling her down into a long and deep kiss.

She broke off and said to me, 'I guess I'm going to have to do all the work here.'

She sighed and then said, 'Jeff, do you know how porcupines make love?'

'No,' I said, thoroughly confused.

'Very, very carefully.' She replied.

I laughed and then stopped as I felt her mouth envelop my rigid cock.

She was a Phd at cocksucking and she took her time; licking, sucking, nipping and stroking my cock and balls, taking me high and then bringing me back down before she finally brought me off. She kept her lips wrapped around me as I climaxed into her mouth. She gagged once and then she must have swallowed. She sucked me dry and then came up the bed to kiss me. I could taste the saltiness of my cum left on her lips.

She slipped out of the bed, said, 'I'll be back, don't go anywhere.'

She must have gone to the bathroom because when she returned she smelled of toothpaste. She came back to bed and lay down beside me. I wanted to reach out and cuddle her but at the moment that was beyond me. I found her hand and brought it up to my lips and kissed it.

I whispered, 'that was awesome, Paula'

She reached out her hand, touched my face and stroked it with her fingers. I nuzzled into it and kissed her fingers.

She said, 'We'll have to talk in the morning, Jeff.'

With that we just lay together and her breathing became slower and she dropped off to sleep. I followed soon after.

I awoke to find myself alone in the bed and for a moment I wondered if the events of last night had been a dream. I smelt coffee brewing and with a rush realised that last night had been real. I had slept with Paula in the literal sense of the word if not the other sense. We had kissed and she had sucked my cock. I went red at the thought of it. Did that mean I was gay? Well I had slept with Paula, not Paul. Even I realised that was a distinction without a difference. I shook my head and thought, 'You know I don't give a damn.'

Paul knocked as he always did and came in with coffee.

'Morning, Jeff, how are you?'

I grunted something. I told you I am not human without coffee.

'Ok. When you've had coffee, can you get yourself out of bed and into the chair?'

'OK, slavedriver.'

'Let me know and I'll come back to collect you.'

How could either of us just not say anything about last night? Are we going to pretend it never happened? Was it just a one night stand? I decided to play it by ear and see what would happen. I did get myself out of bed and wheeled myself off to the wet room. I had got myself out of the chair and on to the stool, when I saw Paul leaning against the door.

'Aren't you going to help?'

'Looks like you're doing a fierce job yourself. Do you need any help?'

'No, probably not.'

'Give me a call if you do.'

I managed well today and wheeled myself out to the living room where Paul had laid breakfast. We ate in silence and then both of us began to speak at the same time. We laughed and that broke the tension.

'You first,' said Paul.

'Lisa,' I said. Paul smiled, 'Yes, your lovely ex who is visiting tonight.'

'Will you be Paul, or Paula?'

'Who would you like me to be?'

I thought for a moment and I knew I should say, Paul.

'Paula,' I said.

'OK but Paula will need a bit more time to compete with a Grace Kelly lookalike if that's OK?'

I laughed and said, 'That's fine, but don't tell her you think she's a Grace Kelly clone, because she is unbearable enough as it is.'

Paul took himself off to get ready at 5 o'clock with Lisa due at 7. I amused myself by looking out the window and reading a bit.

At 6.45, Paula opened her bedroom door and shouted, 'Here I come, ready or not.'

She walked out and my heart skipped a beat. This time she had done her hair like Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's and was wearing another black dress, sleeveless but with a high neck line and a flared skirt together with the black heels she had worn the first night. She wore a single string of pearls around her neck and a silver bracelet on her wrist. I was blown away.

She twirled round and the skirt filled out, 'Will I do?'

'Oh yes, you'll do alright.'

At that moment the intercom buzzed and I wheeled over to let Lisa in. She blew in through the door like a yacht in full sail and stated talking straight away.

I held up my hand for her to stop.

'Lisa, I would like you to meet my new carer.' I motioned to Paula, who stood up from the chair and walked across to Lisa and shook her hand. 'Pleased to meet you Lisa, I have heard so much about you from Jeff.'

Lisa smiled and said, 'Likewise. I'm sorry, I didn't catch you name.'

'It's Paula.'

'Oh hi Paula, that's a coincidence Jeff's last carer was called Paul. What happened to hi...' Lisa stopped dead and stared closely at Paula.

'Oh fucking hell,' she said, 'It can't be can it? Oh shit, it is, you're Paul.' She sat down, looking shocked. 'What the fuck is going on?'

'Lisa,' I said, 'I always told you that you sounded like a truck driver, you still do.'

'Screw that,' she said, 'I need to know what's going on. And I need a drink, a stiff one.'

Paula went to fetch a gin and tonic and brought me a large Scotch. Lisa took a huge gulp and looked at me and then Paula.

'My Christ, Paula, you are gorgeous. You look fabulous.' Lisa was recovering fast. 'You are one big bastard, Jeff for pulling this on me, I will never forgive you. Now, will one of you tell me what the fuck is going on?'

I told Lisa about discovering Paul's secret and Paula told her about growing up and how she became Paula. Lisa was rapt and for once kept quiet for the whole of the story. She sighed and leant back in her chair.

'Paula, that's one hell of a story, you must have been through some rough times.' She nodded her head towards me and said, 'and this old bastard over here didn't mind?'

'No, Jeff has been wonderful. I offered to resign but Jeff said no, he wanted me to stay. He suggested he meet Paula and then he agreed to let me be Paula when I want. I'm Paul during the day as his carer and then I can be Paula in the evening.'

Lisa looked at me over the top of her glass and raised her eyebrows at me. I ignored her but knew she wouldn't let it go.

Paula excused herself and headed to the kitchen.

'Well, well, well, what a tangled web we weave. And are you two, you know, dirty dancing? I mean together?' Lisa was never subtle.

'God, no. I mean it's totally professional and I guess we're friends but that's it, you dirty minded witch.' Even as I said it, I didn't think she believed it.

'I can tell you, I know a whole host of red blooded men who wouldn't hesitate to fuck her brains out given half a chance.'

I said to Lisa, 'Can I trust you on this, this has to be between us, I mean.'

'Oh sure, I'll only tell Paolo, and naturally it'll be on my Facebook page later tonight.'

She saw my face and said, 'Oh, don't wet your pants; I will keep your secret. Anyway, I can't tell Paolo because he would be first in line to have a go at her.'

Second, actually. But I said that in my head.

Lisa said, 'You know he, she whatever looks like Audrey bloody Hepburn? She's gorgeous.'

I smiled and said softly, 'She thinks you look like Grace Kelly, but I shouldn't have told you that.'

'Huumph,' she said, normally a good sign from Lisa, 'but that doesn't make you James Stewart.'

'Paula, I'm coming through to help,' yelled Lisa as she walked into the kitchen.

Help, as in interrogate, I thought.

The evening went extremely well. Lisa seemed to take a real shine to Paula and before we knew it, Lisa was grabbing her coat.

'Got to go see if Paolo has been force feeding the babies pasta again.' She said as she headed for the door. She bent down to kiss me and whispered, 'Better keep your door locked tonight. Or maybe it's already too late.'

'Witch,' I hissed back.

Lisa kissed Paula on both cheeks and sailed out of the door.

I needed a Scotch to recover as Paula and I sat and chatted about Lisa. Paula really liked her and especially so when I told her that Lisa thought she looked like Audrey Hepburn. I was in the wheelchair and Paula was on the sofa, her legs tucked up beneath her. It felt really comfortable just sitting with Paula like this at the end of a lovely evening. I finished my drink and wheeled myself off to the toilet. Next big challenge I thought, what happens tonight?

I came back out and Paula was clearing away. I wheeled over to her and told her to leave those until the morning. I asked if she could wheel me into the bedroom. She did so and then turned to leave.

'Where are you going?' I asked.

'To my bedroom, of course.'

'Better stay here,' I said, 'it will save me having to wheel myself over to your bedroom.'

She smiled slowly, unzipped the dress and let it drop to the floor to reveal just a tiny white bra and knickers. She reached behind her back and unclipped the bra freeing her small but perfect looking breasts. I could see a bulge in the front of her knickers and I shivered at the thought of what that contained. What have I let myself in for, I thought, but my cock began to grow at the sight of Paula's nearly naked body.

I was still in the wheelchair and she began to dance closer, her body moving and gyrating slowly and sinuously to some imaginary music. She put her hands on the arms of the chair and brought her breasts close to my face. I reached out for them but teasingly she moved away again and then dipped back into me so my mouth could just touch a nipple. I flicked out my tongue to brush the nipple and she then pushed it right into my mouth and I sucked it until it grew hard. Moving away again she turned round and brought her bum up close, wiggling it right up to my face.

Spinning around she dipped the other nipple into my face and allowed me to lick that one until it must have been painfully hard. She stood up, her hips grinding from side to side and slid her hands across her belly and up to her breasts, rubbing and kneading them. I heard myself make a sound from somewhere in the back of my throat.

By this time I had a positively painful erection. She dropped to her knees and reached out to slowly ease down the sweat pants I was wearing to let me cock spring free. She looked up at me and slowly leant forward to take me in her mouth, all the while keeping her eyes locked on mine. This was even more spectacular than last night as I could see exactly what she was doing. Her mouth and tongue sucked and licked my cock and balls so expertly that it was not long before I was ready to climax.

She sensed I was close and held me back a little and then accelerated her pace until I could bear it no longer. 'I'm coming, I'm coming.' I managed to blurt out before my hips bucked and I unloaded into her mouth. She looked up at me as she sucked everything into her mouth, swallowed, then licked her lip to clean the last of the cum that had spilled from her mouth.

Paula slowly stood up and I saw that she was aroused because her cock was pushing out over the top of her knickers. I felt a rush of blood through my head and I somehow felt compelled to reach out my hand to touch her. She looked down and said, 'Are you sure?'

I nodded, my tongue too dry to say anything. Paula slipped down the front of her knickers and her cock stood out proudly from her groin, the purple head glistening with pre cum. My fingers brushed the shaft and I jumped as it twitched. It felt soft and warm and hard all at the same time; so much like my own, yet so different. I gently began to stroke it, circling the shaft with my fingers and she began to rock her hips back and forwards so that it slid through my fingers.

I looked up and there was a look of pure bliss on her face as I started to move my hand in time with her thrusts, and I could feel it getting harder as she pushed through my hand. I was mesmerised by the sight of her cock, with its glistening purple head and slit staring at me, daring me to go the next step.

My mind was reeling at what I was doing and as if entranced I moved forward and my tongue flicked out to touch the head that was so close to me. Paula jumped a little as she felt my tongue and I heard a little gasp from her as she realised what was happening. I looked up to see her eyes locked on mine, pleading with me to keep going. I had crossed so many lines already that I thought another would not matter and I opened my lips and took the head of her cock into my mouth.