Recovery Pt. 03

Thanks to everyone who has provided helpful and supportive comments, particularly to those who understand this is a love story, first and foremost.

Disclaimer: All persons involved in any sexual situation are 18 years of age or more. The following story is pure fantasy.

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I stood in the shower for 30 long minutes under the scalding water, letting it redden my skin. No matter how hot the water or how much time I stood there, I could not wash off my shame. Just a couple hours previous I had been so profoundly happy and excited and aroused I thought my life could not possibly get any better. Snuggled up, warm and eager, with a beautiful girl who was willing to let me touch her and kiss her and love her and now I stood, alone and cold in a hot shower, sad and scared and dreading what was to come next.

I had let my lust for my little sister rule over my common sense. It was true: I lusted after Dottie. I'm confident that every man who ever met her lusted after her. She was perfect. A perfect body, a perfectly gorgeous face, and a perfectly wonderful personality. Her eyes, her hair, her smile, her skin, her breasts, her legs, her cute little feet, her preposterously perfect butt- all were undeniably amazing. I hate that I do exactly what other men do- objectifying Dottie but truly it was difficult not to. But there was a big difference between what other men, including my friends, saw in my sister and what I saw. There was one patent truth, a truth I could no longer avoid or ignore.

I was in love with Dottie Harper.

I climbed out of the shower and toweled myself off. I plodded into my room to get dressed, my brain overwhelmed with anxiety. What was going to happen when Aunt Dorothy and Dottie got back from shopping? Aunt Dorothy was sure to be angry and disappointed, particularly at me. That was something that I'd never seen and dreaded experiencing for the first time. Not for something this big. My beloved aunt had witnessed Dottie and me cuddling in my bed in a most inappropriate manner. To be honest I'm not positive she was aware that I was naked nor that she saw us kiss.

And what a kiss! Earlier we had kissed passionately, getting our tongues tangled up with each other, our hormones running rampant. But the kiss this morning was one of affection, not lust. It was gentle and light. It was a kiss of love.

Of course, Aunt Dorothy wouldn't see it that way. Most rational people would consider what Dottie and I did a terrible perversion. Worse yet, the word that made me sick to consider: incest. In my mind incest was an act done by sweaty old men with poor, naïve nieces. Dark room groping between a step-father and step-daughter. A son jerking off over his sleeping mother. My experience with Dottie and my feelings toward her were definitely different, in my opinion. It was fueled by a long-felt lust, for sure. But it was more than that. It felt more pure.

But it was all for naught. Dottie and I had acted on our emotions and now all hell was going to break loose. My aunt was going to be angry and disappointed. And Uncle Paul would either come beat my ass or, far worse, disown and ignore me. I had a great relationship with Uncle Paul. He came over to watch baseball games with me all the time. He taught me how to throw a curveball and how to replace the brakes on my Cherokee.

What if it doesn't stop with Aunt Dorothy and Uncle Paul? Will my cousins find out? My friends? Oh God, my Grandma?

I had no answers, of course, only questions and fears. I sat in my desk chair and did what I usually do when I need to escape. I picked up my guitar. I plugged in my Rockman, put on the headphones and disappeared into my world of arpeggios. Concentrating on guitar always relaxed me and helped peel away the layer of shit the world threw at me. When my mom died, it was a thick-fingered cover of "Eruption" by Van Halen; with my dad, it was Joe Satriani. They were, of course, way out of my league but that didn't stop me from trying. It was a great mind-wipe and occasionally a physical workout. Today was "Black Star" by Yngwie Malmsteen. Not a chance but it was fun trying.

I glanced up to see Dottie leaning against the door frame. She was wearing tight gray leggings, matching her eyes, a blue/gray/white button-up shirt that fit so perfectly across her breasts and a fuzzy blue eternity scarf. Her feet were covered with an old pair of black Chuck Taylor's. Her soft hair was pulled back in a ponytail and as usual, she was wearing no makeup. And there was the smile. She was mesmerizing.

"You're really good," she said, pulling the scarf over her head.

"How would you know?" I asked, removing the headphones. "You can't hear anything."

She laughed softly. "I don't have to. I've heard you play before. And I can see it in your face." She walked in to stand in front of me. "I love that look of concentration when you're playing. It's passion."

I laughed also. "It's mostly exertion and pain. Painful because of how terrible it is."

"Don't sell yourself short, Peter. You have a real talent." She sat down on the edge of my bed. "Do you remember when we were little and you used to pull my hair out straight, not so much that it hurt, and pretend it was guitar strings? We were, what? Seven and eight? I never complained about it. I thought it was hilarious. I would've let you do that all day."

"Well, I'm mediocre at best. I think I was better when I was eight. Your hair was always in tune."

She just sat and smiled at me. I looked over at the doorway nervously. Dottie put her hand on my knee. "Calm down, Peter. If you're looking for Aunt Dorothy, she's already gone home."

I looked at Dottie with bewilderment. "She went home?" I leaned back in my chair. "I thought for sure I was a dead man. Why did she leave?"

"She told me that I needed to talk to you first and that she trusted me to do the right thing. She really is an amazing woman. Did you know she was in a movie? 'The Return of' something or other. Some B-movie horror thing from the 70's. She didn't have a speaking part but she said she can call herself a professional actor. She made $26. See? The two of you have something in common: you're both artists."

I held up my hand. "Wait, wait. You were caught in my bed by our aunt and you talked about 40-year-old horror movies?" I stared at her in disbelief.

"Well, that's not all we talked about, of course."

"And...?"

"Well, we talked about how cold it is in this house. She said it was okay to use the heater for the next couple days, until it heats up again. She said Uncle Paul won tickets to a Clippers game..."

"Dottie! Stop being coy!"

Her smile left her face for just an instant but returned in full glory. "I'm sorry, Peter. Yes, we talked extensively about what she saw when she came looking for me."

"And?" I prompted.

"She didn't know you were naked and of course she never saw me touching you or, thank God, saw how you made me cross-eyed for a minute. What she did see, however, was our kiss."

"Oh Dottie, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to get you in trouble." I ran my fingers through my hair. "I should have had more control. I should have stopped before things got as far as they did."

"Peter, I don't regret anything we did last night." She rubbed my knee lightly, sending delightful signals to my brain. "I wouldn't change anything, even if I could. I've never felt so close to anyone in my life. Seriously," she said, blowing a lock of hair out of her eyes, "if you knew how long I had wanted to kiss you, you'd be shocked."

"Me too, Dottie. It was amazing. But now everything is screwed up. Aunt Dorothy knows, which means soon Uncle Paul will know, then the twins and Carlie and Uncle Mike and Uncle Pat and Grandma. And if Carlie knows, by tomorrow everyone in your school will know. We'll be pariahs!"

"Calm down, Peter. Aunt Dorothy isn't going to say anything to anyone. You don't really think she would do something like that, do you?"

I slowly shook my head. "So what happened, then?"

"Well, the car ride to the store was a little uncomfortable, that's for sure. She just drove and I fiddled with the radio. She always lets me listen to my music when we're together, unlike someone else I know," she said, smiling at me. "Anyway, when we were in the parking lot at the store she just straight out asked me if we had had sex."

"Oh my God. What did you say?"

"What do you mean, what did I say? Obviously I said no. She said she saw me leaning into you and kissing you. She said it was apparent from the looks on both of our faces that it was no regular familial kiss."

"Dottie, I'm so sorry you had to go through this alone."

"No, it's okay. It's probably best that it was that way. At the time I was so terrified she was going to ask me the really tough questions because, you know, I'm a terrible liar. But she never did. She asked if it was mutual between the two of us. She just wanted to make sure there was no pressure. She told me to be careful. She told me to really think about what I'm doing. She told me to be smart and make good decisions. She also told me that she trusts you and she knows you'll do the right thing." She stood and walked closely to me. She slowly straddled my legs and put her arms over my shoulders. "But you know what she didn't tell me to do?"

I looked deeply into her entrancing eyes. "What?"

"She never told me I couldn't do this." She leaned forward and kissed me. It was a deep, soulful kiss, one that tingled from my toes to my head, making the rest of the world and all its cares slip away for a moment. That kind of therapy was much more powerful than any guitar could provide. I reached around and pulled her in tight to me while she nibbled on my lips. I let my mouth trail down to her neck and kissed it gently. Her hair smelled amazing and was making me feel pretty giddy and light-headed. I dropped my hands down and cupped her butt, eliciting a gasp from Dottie. She began to grind herself on my rapidly growing erection. Her thin yoga pants allowed her butt cheeks to grip and pull on my aching cock in a perfectly rhythmic way.

"Did you plan your wardrobe today just for this purpose?" I asked between my sounds of pleasure.

She smiled brightly. "That would've been very presumptuous of me, don't you think?" She never stopped her stroking. "I planned it for how you might like me to look today. I like how my butt looks in these pants." She reached back and put her hands over mine and squeezed. "I can tell you do, too."

"I won't remove them until you tell me to. It's one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. After this." I reached up and put my hands on either side of her face and ran my fingers through her hair. I planted another kiss on her full lips and let my tongue explore inside her welcoming mouth.

When I pulled back she said, "God, Peter, I love the way you make me feel. I'm sure no one else will ever make me feel the way you do."

No one else? I hoped my brief change of expression didn't betray my thoughts. Of course, Peter, you idiot. Did you think you were going to be the only one and this was going to be forever?

I reached up and began slowly unbuttoning her shirt. I got three buttons undone, enough for a considerable amount of her impressive cleavage to come into view, pushed between the two cups of her lacy pink demi-bra. I leaned her back slightly and planted lingering kisses on the tops of both breasts. Looking down I could see her nipples were just as hard as my cock.

Dottie giggled. "As awesome as this feels, Peter, the groceries aren't going to put themselves away." She began buttoning her shirt back up. "I could do this all day but then the steaks would probably go bad on the counter. Can we continue this later?" She climbed off me.

I stood and straightened out my clothing. "Of course, anytime. All the time." A thought worked its way into my head. "Does Aunt Dorothy want me to go talk with her?"

"She said you can go talk to her when you are ready. She was really cool about everything." She looked thoughtful. "This will sound really weird. She didn't actually say it directly but I think she kind of expected us to get into that situation. I think she looks at it as us comforting each other after all the crap we've been through the last couple years. I told her the truth, that last night was the first time we had ever kissed."

I grabbed her hand and pulled her to me. "I have to ask you: is that what this is, comfort?"

Dottie laughed. "Oh no, Peter, although that is probably part of it. What I really want is to do all kinds of really nasty things to your beautiful body, things that would probably make even you blush. I want to get really familiar with this big guy," she said squeezing my dick hard through my sweats. She leaned her head against my chest. "If you want to know the truth, I want to fuck the hell out of you." That was a little startling; Dottie rarely swore. She stood on her tippy-toes and kissed me gently. "But what I want right now is for you to come help me put away the groceries." She turned and walked out of my room. I followed her out.

As she started down the stairs she turned her head and asked, "Are you looking at my ass?"

"Yes," I replied honestly.

"Good," she said rubbing her hands down her butt, "then I did pick my clothes correctly."

We walked into the kitchen and began unloading. Dottie grabbed a head of broccoli and a bag of carrots and put them in the crisper. She bent over and pretended to struggle with the drawer, wiggling her butt back and forth. She turned her head back to me. "Are you going to just stare at my butt or are you going to help me?"

"Can't I do both?" I asked. "I like broccoli but I love your butt." I walked behind her and rubbed my hands up and down her firm bounciness. I hooked my fingers in the top of her yoga pants and shimmied them slowly down, putting her ass covered by sheer pink bikini panties on display. "Perfect," I said squatting down. I palmed and massaged her butt with both hands. "I think a new rule in this house should be that you walk around in just your panties all the time. I just can't believe how perfect your butt looks. It takes my breath away." I leaned forward and planted a firm kiss on her right cheek.

Dottie giggled. "You did say last night that I had the most kissable butt in the world."

"And I meant it! I plan on spending as much time and attention as I can on your ass." I gently kissed both cheeks, making her growl and shiver.

She stood up quickly and pulled her pants up. She looked down at me. "If this goes on any longer I'm going to rape you on the kitchen floor."

"That sounds glorious." I hitched my fingers back into the waist of her pants. She pulled quickly away, laughing.

"No, no, bad boy! We have to finish putting away the groceries!"

I stood and sighed. I began emptying bags and putting things away. Aunt Dorothy was always a great resource for Dottie and me, as we didn't have a whole lot of knowledge about how to shop for groceries. We had both recently learned quite a bit about cooking meals, something we never really had to worry about when Mom was around.

After we finished putting the groceries away Dottie leaned against the counter and asked, "So what's your plan for the rest of the day?"

I walked over to her and pulled her in tight to my chest, enveloping her in a big hug. She sighed contentedly. I said, "Well, I wish that I could spend all day with you, maybe enjoy some quality bonding time but unfortunately I have my Biology final tomorrow and I have got to study for it. I seem to have skipped a few hours study time last night, somehow." She grinned at me.

"I'm a biology master! I can help you study!" She clapped her hands together quickly and quietly.

"I'm sure if we spent more time together we could get plenty of practice studying biology but none that will actually help me with my test tomorrow. But I have to get a good grade. It's really important to me."

"We can do it in public, study that is," she smiled knowingly. "If that will make you feel better. I could really help you with it, you know this. Plus I really want to spend time with you." She hugged me tighter. "Plus, maybe we can talk about what the heck is going on here. I mean, if you want."

"Okay, that would be great." I extricated myself from her embrace. "Right now, I really need to take a quick nap. I didn't get much sleep last night."

"Me either," she said tilting her head up to kiss me, "but I'm glad."

"Me, too."

"Can I join you?" she asked, fluttering her eyelashes.

"Of course. But just sleep!" I said, wagging my finger.

"Yes, dear." She smiled. "You can trust me."

I growled at her and picked her up in my arms, causing her to squeak adorably. One arm under her shoulders and one behind her knees, I carried her up the stairs. She weighed next to nothing. It was like carrying an armload of towels and pillow cases. Soft, curvy, sensual pillowcases that smell really, really good.

I layed her down on the bed. She propped up on her elbows and asked, "I'm saying this strictly for my own comfort and not intended as any kind of seduction or duplicitous act." She popped open the top button of her shirt. "Can I take my shirt off?" She opened a second button. "It's really uncomfortable to sleep in one of these kinds of shirts."

"Yes." I sat down next to her. "Let me help you." I popped open all her buttons without losing eye contact with her and tossed her shirt on the floor. It was very difficult to not look down. I'd wanted to see her breasts for so long. After a moment, I could wait no longer. They were fantastic.

She reached behind her to undo her bra but I grabbed her arms to stop her. She looked up at me and said softly, "I'm sorry, Peter." I reached around her and quickly popped open her bra and tossed it on the floor. "Oh. You can do that quicker than I can."

"I couldn't wait." I took in her magnificent breasts. They were large for her small frame, round and full. There was no sag to them, the wonder of an 18-year-old's total disregard for gravity. There were no tan lines; the long, cold Ohio winter had seen to that. The small areola and nipples fit perfectly on my tiny sister. Her nipples were twisted into little knots. Dottie was obviously seriously aroused.

"You can touch them if you want." She leaned in for a quick peck. "Please touch them, Peter."

I ran my hand around her right breast, lifting it lightly. I ran my thumb over her nipple and pinched it, just a bit, and Dottie gasped quietly. I met her gaze and was astounded to see my love and lust mirrored in her eyes. I leaned forward and planted a kiss on both breasts, then swirled my tongue around a nipple. I sucked it lightly into my mouth and nibbled gently. Dottie began to breathe quicker and moan softly. I popped her nipple from my mouth and gave it a long lick. "My god, they're perfect." I looked back up into her eyes. "Why are you letting me do this? You can have anyone you could want. I mean, literally, anyone. Why your troll of a brother?"

Dottie was still a little breathless. "I think you know the answer to that question, Peter. First of all, troll? You're the most handsome man I've ever met. And you make me feel things I've never felt before. I mean even when you're not touching me. Touching me is good, though. Feel free to continue."

I gave her a long, lingering kiss. "Let's get some sleep. I have to study today. I mean it."

She lay down and turned her back to me. Without looking she reached back and wiggled her fingers at me. I lay down behind her and cuddled up, spooning closely. Naturally my ever-present erection pushed its way between her butt cheeks.