Run and Hide Pt. 03

Paul didn't say anything. He let the silence prompt Ace to continue.

"He was beautiful. He was wonderful when we were alone. I couldn't believe my luck when he turned my way that first night. He was everything I could have hoped for."

Paul stomach turned in disappointment.Hewanted to be everything for Ace, but what if he was still hung up on an ex?

"But he was also a Southern Baptist who loved his momma, and he's never ever going to come out of the closet." Paul saw pain flash across Ace's face, and it made his chest hurt. "It took me more than two years of hoping and disappointment to figure that out."

"You loved him," Paul said sadly.

Ace frowned. "I don't know if you can call it love when you're the only one in it. But I thought I did. Love him, that is. It felt like love."

"But he didn't?"

"If he loved me, he wouldn't have treated me that way," Ace said with a note of bitterness.

A bolt of anger shot through Paul. "What did he do to you?"

"It wasn't like he abused me or anything," Ace said. "Nothing dramatic like that. He was the perfect boyfriend in private then pretended he didn't know me when we saw each other in public."

Just like I did,Paul thought, deep guilt replacing his anger.

"I never got to meet his family, never brought his mom a Christmas present, never sat with him in a candlelit restaurant." Ace barked out a harsh laugh. "Here I am lecturing you on what makes a proper gay date-date, and I haven't had one in, well, almost forever." He turned to look at Paul. "You're already doing better than him, you know."

Paul felt hope rise in him. "How so?"

"Cameron would never have taken me to a ballgame. Never. And buying me cotton candy? Forget it." Ace slumped back into the couch cushions and closed his eyes.

Relief lapped at Paul's heart, but he didn't want to make any assumptions. "So, where does this leave me with you?" He was still genuinely worried that Ace would tell him goodbye once and for all. And Paul wouldn't blame him in the slightest, not after Ace had been burned by Paul's Atlanta twin.

Ace sighed deeply. "I'm trying very hard not to get hurt again." He tentatively reached over to take Paul's hand in his. "But I can't stay away from you, Paul. You've gotten in."

Paul let out the breath he'd been holding. "I love it in there. It feels like home in there."

Ace blinked sleepily at him. "Take me to bed, Paul."

And Paul did. He led Ace by the hand to his bedroom upstairs and slowly, reverently peeled the clothes from Ace's body and then his own.

They weren't rushed, weren't frantic and desperate. This wasn't a time to conquer; it was a time to savor and feast. Paul forced himself to slow down, to taste every inch and memorize the lines and delicious paths of his lover's body.

And when the teasing finally became too much, Paul gave in to the pulsing ache of his body and pressed slowly inside Ace.

It felt so right, so complete – he had to bite his cheek to stop himself from confessing his love at that moment. Ace wasn't the only one here who needed to protect his heart.

Afterward, they lay together in that post-orgasmic coma, their breaths pulled rough and wet from their lungs. Paul kept his hands always touching Ace somewhere, his skin like a steadying anchor.

"So," Ace said breathlessly. "Do I need to head home now? Escape before the sun rises?"

Paul tugged Ace close and tipped his head up so he could look into his eyes.

"I don't think you know," Paul rasped, "you can't possibly know, how much I'd give up, what I'd do, what I'm willing to sacrifice, just to be with you like this. To be able to touch you like this. To feel this way. God, the things you do to me."

In response, Ace curled closer, tucking his head against Paul's neck, and breathed deeply.

This is worth it,Paul thought. He didn't know how it was all going to fall out, but if the reward was even just one more night like this, it would be worth it.

*****

It turned into many more nights like that one over the next month. It was a month of increasingly bold baby steps – and the requisite stumbles – a month of hopeful gestures and of sweeter and hotter sex.

Friends and family took a back seat for a while as Ace and Paul learned how to be together. It wasn't just that they couldn't stop touching each other – though that certainly was the case. It was more basic than that, and so much more complex. They had to learn how to be friends and lovers at the same time. How to negotiate their needs and wants.

And it all happened in those damn baby steps.

But at least they were steps – small steps out of that closet. Steps like Paul's clothes mixing into Ace's laundry. Or simply the fact that they spent all their time at Ace's house, the place Paul fled from on that first morning after. Ace could smell Paul all over the house, and that – more than any remodeling project – was making his house feel like home.

It took a couple of weeks for Lola to give Paul full approval, and it took multiple bribes, of course. But then one Sunday afternoon as they were sprawled on the sofa and fruitlessly trying to stave off a nap, Lola leapt up onto Ace's hip and purposefully crawled over his body to get to Paul.

"Yeah, that's fair," Ace grumbled. "Took me months to win Lola over, and you get snuggles within two weeks."

Paul grinned that wide, melting grin at him as he stroked Lola's back. "Your cat's a good judge of character," he said.

Lola settled in next to Ace's head, which was resting on Paul's thighs, and Ace's ears were filled with the sound of contented purring.

Yeah, I'm with ya, babe,Ace thought.'That's what he makes me do, too.

The only other outsider they allowed in to this cocoon was the one who simply muscled her way in: Holly. Ace wished he could have split himself equally in two – half of him could continue spending all his free time with Paul, while the other half could weave Holly into his other friendships.

He spared a moment of guilt when he thought of how severely he was neglecting his friendship with Erik. But the moment dissolved as soon as he heard Paul slip into a snore-filled nap.

Holly was able to sneak away from Steven for a visit to Lawrence to meet Ace's house the next Thursday. Once inside the door, she took everything in with big eyes and instantly pronounced herself in love.

"Do you think I could convince Steven to go with that shade of purple for the bedroom?" she asked excitedly, analyzing the dining room walls with a calculating eye.

Ace looked at Paul for confirmation, and then they said in unison, "No."

"Speaking of the man," Ace said, "what did you tell Steven about tonight?"

"Oh," she said, waving away the thought like a gnat, "Steven thinks I'm off with the girls. If I'd told him I was visiting you, he'd want to come along, and then we'd have to make up some outlandish story about why Paul is here." She turned to Paul, who was lounging on the sofa. "You know, it would be so much easier if you could just –"

"I know, I know," Paul said impatiently. "It's on my list. I promise." He tugged Ace down to the seat next to him and tucked him under his arm. "Just let me enjoy this calm before the shit storm a little while longer."

Mmmm. Me too,Ace thought.

For all the steps Paul had made – a couple of shopping trips in Lawrence, dinner at a sports bar in Kansas City, one furtive trip back to Sparks – he and Ace were still essentially hiding from the world. Specifically, from Paul's world.

Ace was being patient. But his patience came with a big, blinking "don't forget" sign hanging over his head.

That night, the three friends ate Chinese food in the living room while Holly quizzed Ace about every bit of art and architecture in his house. Paul was content to let Lola walk all over him and occasionally offer bits of his lo mein to the cat's imperious requests.

When talk switched to Holly's wedding plans, Ace sat back and let Holly fret over the details in the way a bride was wont to. He looked over to Paul, who sent him a slow, almost sleepy smile that spread all over his face and to the depths of those grey-blue eyes. It hit Ace so hard that he almost choked on his tongue.

Ace was in love with this man.

Ho-ly crap.

It wasn't a grand gesture that brought this about. It wasn't a holiday or a rescue or a heartfelt speech. It was the sight of Paul leaning back on the sofa, Lola curled up on his lap, a smile that went all the way to his blood. He looked like he belonged in Ace's house – in Ace's life. He fit, almost effortlessly.

Ace loved him.

He wasn't ready to say it out loud yet. He'd been burned by that before. People tossed around those words too cavalierly, in his opinion. When he said "I love you," he wanted it to mean more than, "that was a very satisfying orgasm" or "thank you for doing what I wanted."

And, even though it was selfish and cowardly of him, he didn't really want to be the first to say it. A relationship was a delicate balance of power, especially between two men. As soon as he said the L-word, Ace would be the one waiting for validation, for reciprocation.

He'd been in that position before, and he didn't want to suffer in that ring of hell again.

Like Paul, he wanted to enjoy this comfortable calm for a while longer. Even if his heart was beating up a storm.

Chapter 11

It had been three weeks since Erik had seen Ace, that night he helped pick out a shirt for the big date. In that time, Erik had heard Ace's voice exactly once, when their first Sunday afternoon was canceled. He didn't even get to hear any good play-by-play after the date as he had expected. A few rushed texts with apologies and promises – that's all Ace had for him anymore.

Erik knew he should have been expecting this. A guy as hot as Ace couldn't stay single forever. But it was jarring how completely Ace had dismissed him once Paul had decided to act like a boyfriend. At the very least, Erik had thought he and Ace would talk about this new guy the way friends did.

He'd even driven by Ace's house a few times hoping he could just pop in, but that black Acura was almost always in the driveway.

It was a sorry statement about Erik's social life that the absence of one friend left him essentially alone. He couldn't even make himself seek out distractions in Kansas City – that was still Richard's territory. It was a ridiculous, self-imposed rule, but one that Erik never broke.

So he threw himself into his work and found himself still in the university's public relations office after dark on a Thursday night. In theory, he was there to supervise his Web team on a project that needed to be presented in the morning. But, really, he didn't want to be at home alone with nothing to do but stew.

Erik glanced at the clock. Nine on a Thursday night. Maybe Ace would be home alone? Surely they took nights off from each other?

He picked up his phone but hesitated on the dial button. What if they were in the middle of something? What if Ace answered the phone all out of breath and obviously mid-fuck?

Three weeks,he reminded himself.You exist too.He pressed the button.

"What now?" Ace immediately growled.

Erik flinched. "Um, you're busy then?" he asked in a small voice.

"Erik," Ace sighed. "So sorry. Thought it was someone else."

Erik frowned. "If it's the someone I think it is, he should be working in the room next to me right now, not bugging my best friend."

"My best friend should definitely tell him that, right, best friend?" Ace said.

"You chickenshit. He seems impervious to your cunning policy of ignoring him. It's not my job to do pest control for you."

Erik could hear voices in the background – and not just that deep rumbling tone of the boyfriend.

"Am I interrupting?" he asked.

"Ah," Ace hesitated. "Not really, no. I've got some time. Haven't talked to you in a while."

No shit,Erik thought bitterly.Whose fault is that?

"Actually, that's kind of why –" Erik started. A woman's voice broke in loudly in the background.

"Hey sweetie, what's your wireless password?"

"One sec," Ace said to Erik. "No wire hangers exclamation mark, all one word," he called out to the woman.

Erik chuckled despite himself. "I thought you said that one was too gay even for you."

"I decided it was subtle enough on the gay reference quotient."

"So who was that just now?" Erik asked.

"That would be Holly," Ace said. "Paul's soon-to-be sister-in-law."

"She broke through the firewall, huh?" Erik said.

"She is hard to stop," Ace said warmly. "You'd love her."

Ruthless, irrational jealousy started whispering in Erik's head. Not only did Paul take away Ace from him, but now Ace was getting his friendship fix elsewhere too. Erik was being doubly replaced.

"Oh yeah?" Erik asked, his throat tight, trying desperately to mask his hurt.

"Yeah, we'll have to figure out a time to all get together," Ace said. "She loves playing matchmaker. I might have to sic her on you."

"Great," Erik said with false brightness.Wow, absolutely the last thing I want right now."So, the reason I called. Can you pull yourself away from your hot chiropractor for a night so we can catch up over dinner?"

Ace paused, obviously weighing his options.Come on, don't make me beg,Erik thought.

"Um, of course, yeah," Ace said. "What works for you?"

"Tomorrow night?" Erik said tentatively. "I know it's a traditional date night, but it will leave you the rest of the weekend to crawl back into the boyfriend cocoon."

"Yeah," Ace said slowly. "Let me check with Paul real quick."

Erik heard only the muffled conversation from his end. Tanner popped his head in the door to Erik's office, and Erik silently motioned for him to wait.

"I think Friday will work," Ace said, returning to the phone. "Pick me up around six?"

Erik let out a breath. "Six will be great. And thank Paul for me – for letting you out for a night."

"Har har."

"See you tomorrow." Erik hung up and waved Tanner in. "Well,thattoo entirely too much effort," he grumbled.

Tanner plopped down into one of the guest chairs. "Trouble with Ace?"

"Same thing happens every time," Erik sighed deeply. "Your friend meets someone, and then disappears from the face of the Earth. Gotta move mountains to pry them apart."

Tanner leaned forward. "Oh? Ace met someone?"

"Can't blame him, really," Erik said, mostly to himself. "Super hot guy. If I'd known he was on the menu ..."

"And his name is Paul?" Tanner said casually.

A warning bell sounded in Erik's subconscious. He looked up and found Tanner eager to hear more.

"Um, yeah," Erik said.

"Yeah, I overheard you talking." Tanner put on an appropriately sympathetic face. "Sounds like Ace dumped you for this hot Paul guy."

"No, no," Erik said quickly. "We were never – I mean, it's not like we-"

"No, I get it. It feels like you're losing him, doesn't it? It actually explains a lot," Tanner murmured.

That doesn't sound promising.

"Look, Tanner," Erik began. But he stopped himself. What should he clean up Ace's mess with this student? Erik didn't need to doallthe heavy lifting in this friendship.

"Um," Erik shook his head and continued, "so, what did you need?"

"Oh, right. Need you to check my pages and make sure they're good to go."

"Of course. I'll be right there."

Tanner headed back to his computer station, and Erik missed the calculating grin on the younger man's face.

*****

"Tanner Caldwell? Doctor Z is ready for you."

Tanner stood and ran his hand through his hair. He had been able to get a last-minute appointment with Dr. Paul McDonnell after laying on the charm with the perky secretary.

Bat those eyes all you want, sweet cheeks. I don't go for breast meat.

"Thanks, babe," he winked at the blonde chick at the desk. She giggled, and Tanner fought the urge to roll his eyes. Man, chicks were so easy. It was almost a waste that he couldn't use his superior sexual power on such easy prey.

Then he caught a glimpse of his intended prey.

Well, not really a waste.

Tanner had heard most of his boss's side of a phone call with Ace, and it had been very useful. He put "chiropractor" together with the name "Paul" and came up with Dr. Z, the dude most of his intramural frat buddies went to see when they jacked up their backs.

Tanner had no idea that Dr. Sex on a Stick played for his team. It was almost enough of a temptation for him to abandon his plans with Ace.

Almost.

Just thinking of the two of them together gave Tanner half a stiffy, and he started envisioning threesomes, sucking and fucking until they all passed out.

Tanner wasn't prepared for how delicious his competition was. All that dark hair, tanned skin, sexy beard. Damn. Initially, he'd wanted to size him up and figure out how to steal Ace away from him. Now, though, he'd be happy with either guy as a consolation prize.

"Mr. Caldwell?" Dr. Z's deep, smooth voice brought Tanner back to the present. "Let's see what we can do for you today."

"Oh, I've got some ideas," Tanner cooed, and the doc gave a little start as he shut the office door behind them. "I assume I need to take this off?" Tanner asked sweetly, fingering his shirt buttons.

Paul cleared his throat and checked his chart. "You said the pain is in your lower back?"

Tanner pasted on a grimace. "Yeah, it's been like this for a couple of days. My Delta buddies said you were the guy to see."

"Okay." Paul put down his chart. "Go ahead and take off your shirt and climb up here on your stomach, please."

Tanner slid into place and made sure to wiggle his tight butt more than strictly necessary.

Dr. Z began examining his lower back, touching Tanner's bare skin with his fingertips.

"I don't suppose an appointment with you comes with a happy ending, does it, doc?" Tanner grinned.

He heard Paul clear his throat. "Sorry to disappoint, Mr. Caldwell," Paul said dryly. "All I can offer is a slight spinal adjustment."

"What a shame. A hot doc like you? You could really pick up some business," Tanner purred, wiggling his butt again. "I'd be happy to spread the wuuuuuh!"

Paul abruptly applied pressure to Tanner's spine, rendering his patient temporarily nonverbal.

"How does that feel?"

"Good," Tanner grunted breathlessly. "I think?" he squeaked.

"Did that take care of the pain you were feeling?"

"Uh, can you do some more maybe? A little lower?" Tanner readjusted his head and neck. "The top of my ass, really. That would be great." He moved his hand to his shorts to show the good doc exactly where he wanted those hands.

"That won't be necessary," Paul said quickly. He lightly probed that area, testing for signs of problems. Tanner let himself enjoy the feeling for a moment. But then it was time to step up his game plan.

"So, I hear we have a friend in common," he said casually.

"Mmmm?" Paul said, distracted. "One of the Deltas who referred you?"

"No, I was thinking of someone a lot closer – to both of us. Ace Hoffman."

Paul dug sharply into another muscle, and Tanner grunted at the sensation.

"Oh?" Paul said, his voice a touch higher than normal.

"Yeah, I do some Web work for him. And other things."

Paul's hands stilled. "He, uh," Paul cleared his throat again. "He said we knew each other?"

Tanner smirked. "Well, you do, don't you?" He craned his head around. "I hear you know each other really well, actually."

Paul's face was carefully screened to neutral, so Tanner resettled himself face down. "You know, since we're on the subject, I'm surprised my Delta bros didn't tell me about you. I mean, they aren't all gay or anything, but I've taught them how to spot the signs."