Secret Smiles and Three Little Words Pt. 25

He was thankful that he had a mother that was so unlike Marylyn in most instances. He thought of what his mother would have done to Marylyn had she gone after Alex in her presence. His mother would had held nothing back, he wasn't lying when he said she would have adored Alex. She would have, and because he loved her, that would have been enough for his mother to defend Alex as her own.

Alex came in in a robe that stopped mid-thigh. She knelt at the side of the bed in the submissive pose. He looked at her for a few seconds. Her desire to become a true submissive for him had him shaking his head. He saw her eyes and they were betraying her and her tears, as they were reddened and puffy. She was doing her best to keep them from him, but she shouldn't have bothered. If she truly understood his Dom, she wouldn't have tried.

"Come to bed Little One," he said softly.

"Dressed or undressed," she asked before she stood.

"Dressed," he told her.

She rose and pulled her robe off dropping it on the floor revealing herself in a spaghetti strap camisole top and matching silk bottoms. She got into bed under the covers and he guided her head to his stomach where she laid her cold wet hair on his skin causing him to flinch slightly.

"Sorry," she whispered.

"Just a little cold," he smiled as he began to stroke her hair.

"No," she whispered. "For embarrassing you."

"How did you do that?" He asked her.

"As a sub, I'm a reflection of my Dom," Alex admitted. "I should treat people the way you would treat them. I know there is no way you would have spoken to your mother like that, or anyone like that. I failed you."

"Where did you hear that?" Gavin asked her.

"When you had me on my quest," Alex said softly. "I was talking to Kelly and some of her friends that were also in the life...I found I wasn't doing anything like a submissive."

"Look at me," he demanded. She turned over and he hit the mute on the TV. "Explain."

"They were going over what a good submissive does," Alex shrugged. "I wasn't doing any of them!"

"Tell me what a good submissive does," Gavin said to her.

"Well, the first one which causes me to believe I'm doomed, is patience," Alex shrugged. This caused Gavin to chuckle with the way she said it. She smiled.

"What else did they tell you?" he asked her.

"Oh God! The list of what I'm not doing is endless!" Alex frowned looking up and shaking her head. "The two biggies I guess, is respect and grace."

"Respect and grace?" Gavin quizzed.

"I was told, how I treat others was a sign of my Dom, if I showed respect then it looked good upon you, if I was disrespectful then...," Alex let a lone tear fall. "And we won't even get into my lack of grace!"

Alex continued on with the list of things that were believed to be good qualities of a sub.

"Look," Gavin said with a shake of his head when she was finished. "Nobody can be all those things! It's impossible! If you did those things, you wouldn't be human, you would be a robot!"

Alex looked up at him confused.

"Alex," Gavin said sitting up to where she was kneeling in the submissive position in the bed. He stroked her face.

"Yes, you should strive to be all those things," Gavin admitted. "But you can't be that at all times! That isn't you."

"I want it to be me," Alex told him. "I want to be a great sub for you! I want to be something you are proud of!"

"Whoa! When have I ever said I wasn't proud to have you by my side?" Gavin asked her.

"The girls indicated I wasn't a true submissive," Alex pointed out.

Gavin let his head fall back as he thought about it. He lifted it slowly.

"Do you know why I violated my absolute and took you in?" Gavin asked her. She shook her head and shrugged at the same time. "It was because you did something for me that no other sub had done."

"What was that?" Alex asked him. "Piss you off?" This caused him to laugh.

"No," he smiled. "You challenged me. Not in an insubordinate way, but in like climbing a mountain way. You gave me a goal." The look she gave him told him she was not understanding. "That is what a Dom and sub should do for one another above all else, challenge each other!"

"Do you remember when you first sat at my table?" he asked her about their first night. "You sat there and told me you had absolutely no experience as a submissive, your one idea of it was a farce!" She nodded that she was following along.

"I'll admit, sitting there at that table I was thinking of all the delicious things I wanted to do to you, all of the fun I could have with your body," he admitted to her softly.

"Then the Dom in me said, this isn't your sub, this young lady would be unlike any sub you have had before," he told her. "The man in me wanted you for sexual gratification, purely physical. My Dom wanted you for the challenge. The emotional challenge. That challenge was to show you what this life really is, to guide you into becoming an excellent sub."

"Every sub I have owned had those qualities they told you about," Gavin continued. "But you had a spirt none of them had, that is why it is so important to me that you don't lose who you are. That's the challenge, to keep you who you are, but keep you as my sub. I wouldn't want it any other way!"

"Strive for those things, but know, you won't be that person all the time," Gavin shrugged. "And that is ok, we all fail, I fail as a Dom, but I always try to be better."

"Funny," Alex frowned. "When they described the perfect Dom, you had every one of those qualities!"

"I've been in this life for years," Gavin pointed out. "I wasn't like this in the beginning. I had some of the traits, sure, but I had to work on them. Just like you have to! Do not let your setbacks become all you see. You have made great strides...see? As a Dom I have failed you."

"How do you figure?" Alex snapped.

"I wasn't complimenting your progress, letting you know that you were doing well!" Gavin told her. "As a Dom I'm supposed to tell you those things. Like when you came in here just now, you went into the submissive position. I didn't tell you 'good girl' for that! I should have, to let you know that you are doing a great job. No, I took it for granted. Not exactly good Dom behavior. That's because every other sub I have owned had already mastered that, you are a novice, but you are so perfect that I forget you are a novice."

"Oh yes, my Alexandria," Gavin smiled kissing her lips. "You are a challenge, you have challenged me to be a better Dom, and just like you, I'm trying to improve. If you had never come along, I never would have been forced to improve. See that is the key, to challenge one another to be better. It's not just in the BDSM world, it's in the vanilla world as well, we should challenge each other as a couple, as lovers, as friends and as humans."

"Thank you Sir," she smiled as she kissed his lips. She pushed him back to the bed and laid her head on his stomach again. Returning to the simple pleasure of his hands in her hair.

"Have you ever noticed," Gavin said softly. "That it is easier to give respect to a total stranger than to people we know?"

She tilted her head to look at him.

"Take me for example," Gavin told her. "I open doors for perfect strangers, manners yes, but it's also respect, given freely because that is the way I was raised." She nodded that she understood what he was saying.

"My guess is that you lack of respect for your mother is well earned," Gavin told her. "She earned that for her lack of respect for the things you believe in. Your art, yourself, your friends...your father." Alex nodded and turned back to the TV. Gavin understood her completely. He also washed away her guilt from the day.

"There is one thing I want you to consider though," he continued.

"What is that," she asked.

"You still need to respect your mother," he told her.

"Because she gave birth to me?" Alex asked.

"No," Gavin told her firmly. "Because of your father. If you respect him, you must respect her."

"Why?" Alex fired at him.

"Because he loves her," Gavin explained. "You are disrespecting him if you don't at least act cordially to her. This is the woman he loves, she may have lost the respect, but he obviously hasn't, so if you respect him, show him, by treating her the way he would want her treated."

"I pity anyone who knows me that treats you with anything less the utmost respect! The wrath that would rain down on them would make them regret even being born," he said solemnly.

***

Gavin pulled up along the road, there was cars parked in the driveway unlike the day before.

"Looks like the rest of the sisters are here," Alex frowned.

She was dreading going in after the day before. Most of the time when she and her mother fought there was time in between seeing each other again. Sometimes it was years! It all depended on how awful the fight was.

"Are you ready?" Gavin asked her softly.

She sat looking at the door, she didn't want to go in. She wanted to go back to Chicago and spend the holidays with Gavin. Alone. This was such a monumental mistake. She wouldn't be surprised that Gavin didn't pull a Lena and refuse to come back for the way her family acted.

She saw a little face pressed to the window and that made her smile. Little Nora was peering out.

"Seems like the advance scout has spotted us," Gavin pointed out.

"Nothing gets past Nora," Alex grinned. "We had better go in, otherwise she will be out here, barefoot in the snow!"

"Ok," he smiled.

He walked around the car and just as he got her door opened the front door to the house opened.

"Aunt Alex!" the little girl screamed as she ran out of the house leaving the front door standing wide open.

"Absolutely not!" Alex barked at her. "You go back in before you get pneumonia!"

Nora disregarded her command and came out in a full sprint.

"Oh, so it's a family trait," Gavin deadpanned noticing the little girl did not slow down, let alone adhere to the command.

Nora split them as she leapt into Alex's arms with a squeal. Gavin shucked his coat and draped it over her to protect her from the single digit cold.

"I've missed you!" Nora blurted. "Can I have your colors from your room and your paints? Can I have the horse picture? And the one with the butterflies?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Alex beamed hugging the girl. "Slow down!"

"Another family trait," Gavin teased. Alex glanced at him for his teasing.

"Who is that?" Nora asked looking at him for the first time.

"This is my boyfriend," Alex said proudly.

"You have a boyfriend?" Nora asked.

"Well don't sound so surprised!" Alex laughed as she spun Nora in a circle making her laugh.

"His name is Gavin," Alex said when she was done spinning. She looked up to see Livy on the porch.

"She has been dying to see you," Livy called out. "Her favorite aunt!"

Alex started to carry the little girl in, pulling Gavin's coat tighter around her to protect her from the cold.

"I have a boyfriend too!" Nora whispered in her ear. "His name is Greggory, but don't tell mom!"

"Our secret!" Alex whispered back kissing her cheek which brought a kiss in return.

"Hi Gavin," Livy laughed as he came up the steps. "Sorry for the attack of the munchkin!"

"No problem at all," Gavin assured her. "I haven't seen Alex smile like that in a while, so it's worth it."

Alex set her down on the floor as soon as they were inside.

"I can't believe you came out without a coat!" Alex finally took the time to chastise her. "You could have gotten sick."

"Aunt Alex! I had my boots on!" Nora said like that was all she needed to fend off any illness.

"Not good enough!" Alex warned her dropping to her knees to warm Nora up with her rubbing of the little girl's arms. "Is it Dr. Steward?"

"No, it really isn't," Gavin agreed. "It's like walking in sub-zero wind chills from the train! In a sleet!"

"Not helping," Alex pointed out what he was getting at.

"Wasn't trying to," Gavin said firmly.

"Never going to live that one down am I?" Alex asked snuggling her niece.

"No," he said plainly.

"You are a doctor?" Nora asked him. He nodded. "You must be really smart!"

"Some people think so, but some people treat me like I'm dumb!" Gavin pointed to Alex who had her back to him so she didn't see it.

"You think Gavin is dumb?" Nora asked her.

"What?" Alex coughed out, she looked behind her at him.

"Ask her, when she had pneumonia, who was trying to convince me that I didn't know how sick she was?" Gavin teased.

"Don't listen to him," Alex tried. "He just likes to give me a hard time!"

"You should spank him then!" Nora suggested with a smile. "Daddy says that's what bad boys and girls get!"

Gavin barked out a laugh which he covered and looked to Alex.

"Oh please don't," Gavin said dryly. Alex blushed red and didn't look back.

"Merry Christmas!" Al called out to her when he came into the hallway. Alex went to him and hugged him tightly.

"Merry Christmas," she said within his embrace. "I'm sorry for last night." She whispered while he still held her. "I will behave today, I promise! For you!"

"You are my little girl," Al smiled pulling back. "You never have to apologize to me!"

"Yes I do," Alex said. "I love you."

"I love you," Al said kissing her cheek. "C'mon in the kids have been dying to open the gifts!"

Alex coming into the living room brought out another round of semi hugs from her sisters and their children and husbands. Gavin was introduced and all had the same lifted eyebrows look of pleasant surprise. Alex clutched his hand with one hand, and held Nora on her hip with the other.

Nora refused to be put down and every time her mother would try, Alex would shoo her away.

"So let's get to it!" Al called out from the living room where the tree was.

The kids needed no other encouragement as they ran to the room. Gavin followed Alex in as she talked with Nora about the gifts she got at her father's the night before.

While Gavin sat on the couch, Alex sat at his feet with Nora. The kids tore into the gifts opening them in a frenzy. Alex watched with pride as her nieces and nephews opened her gifts. Each and every one of them looked shocked at the gifts they had been presented with. Each looked to her in pleasured thank yous.

"Oh my God!" her eldest nephew gasped as he looked into his box.

"Trevor!" his mother immediately admonished his blasphemy.

"An autographed Sid the Kid jersey?" Trevor gasped pulling it out reverently.

"You still play, right?" Alex asked basking in his response. He nodded. "Still wearing his number?" He nodded again as he stared at the black and gold hockey jersey.

"You should thank Gavin," Alex smiled at him. "He is the one that got his autograph on it."

"You met Sidney Crosby?" Trevor asked moving closer to Gavin.

"Yeah," Gavin shrugged. "I know most of the Blackhawks, some are patients of mine. I had asked them if they would get it autographed for you, but they told me to come down to the United Center and get it. Sid had a bad chest cold, so I gave him something for it, got a lot of ribbing for it because he went out and had two goals and an assist! They said I wasn't allowed to treat opponents until after the game!" Gavin laughed causing Trevor to laugh with him.

"What's he like?" Trevor asked.

"Good guy, funny," Gavin told him with a shrug. "A guy to look up to for sure."

"Wow! You met Sid the Kid!" Trevor couldn't believe it. "Thanks Aunt Alex!" He said hugging her. "This is by far the greatest Christmas ever!" He gently put the jersey on and sat down.

"Princess dresses!" Nora shrieked above all the commotion. "Belle's dress! Ariel! Anna and Elsa!" Nora abandoned them all to jump into Alex's arms.

"How did you know?" Nora asked her.

"I had a little elf tell me," Alex smiled looking at Livy.

"I said one," Livy pointed out. "Not all of them!"

"I couldn't decide which princess she would be, so I got them all so she could be them all!" Alex said accepting Nora's loving kiss.

"Go give this one to Grandpa!" Alex whispered handing Nora an envelope after she put on one of her dresses.

Nora went over and handed the envelope to Al who bowed to her royal highness as he took it.

"Alex, I told you not to bother," Al warned her.

"I don't live under your roof anymore," Alex smiled defiantly.

"Gavin," Al looked to him for help.

"No way, she's way too mean for me to tangle with!" Gavin laughed.

Al opened his envelop.

"Oh Sweetheart! This must have cost you a fortune!" Al said pulling his Steeler tickets out. "Fifty yard line lower bowl?"

"Just repaying you for all the games you took us to!" Alex told him, her heart floating at his response.

"We never got these type of seats!" Al gasped.

"It's time," Alex smiled.

Gavin patted her on her shoulder for a job well done and Alex took his hand and kissed it lovingly.

"Gavin?" Nora called out. "Should I give Alex her gift from you?"

"Sure," Gavin smiled at her as she picked up the small box.

Nora ran to her and jumped in her lap, then handed her the box.

"Want to help me?" Alex asked her. Nora began to help unwrap the paper. Alex stopped when she saw the blue felt jewelry box.

"Maybe he got you a wedding ring!" Nora said as she saw the box.

"Easy now!" Gavin warned with a laugh.

"This is too big for an engagement ring!" Alex smiled kissing her niece for bringing it up. The Cartier label had her frowning at the cost of what was inside. The name alone reminded her of the jewelry counter lady who said that some watches ran in the tens of thousands.

Nora helped her gently open the box.

"OH MY GOSH!" Nora gasped. "Are those real diamonds?" Nora asked turning to him. Gavin smiled and winked at her.

"Jesus," Alex gasped as she looked at it. The watch diamonds sparkled in the light streaming in from the window. The diamonds encircled the watch face and went down the band. "Gavin!"

"Merry Christmas," he said to her as she moved up to kiss him.

"I don't want to hear one thing about what I got you!" she threatened. "It doesn't come close to this!"

"We'll see," Gavin said after staring at her for a few seconds.

"Kiss her!" Nora suggested. "You have to kiss a girl after you give her diamonds!"

"Well," Gavin smiled. "I don't want to break protocol!" They kissed gently as Nora squealed.

Nora then ran back to the tree and tried to lift Gavin's gift while Alex blushed at the way Gavin was looking at her.

"Gavin!" Nora complained. "Yours must be tools! This is really heavy like tools!"

"Tools?" Gavin smiled as Alex closed her eyes.

He nearly laughed out loud, he had already told her he knew nothing of mechanics. So tools was most definitely not in the box. He looked to Alex to watch her close her eyes regretfully.

This was the moment she had been dreading for weeks now. It seemed like such a good idea at the time, but that was before the pneumonia, before the fight, before the commitment to be a proper submissive. This could be very bad!