Self Comfort

Ginger yelled back as if she were an experienced stripper disrupted in the middle of her act, " Whatever you say, Mommy ", this while holding her gaze on me but by then I had taken two steps backwards and was preparing to make my exit. I couldn't help admitting to myself, I just wasn't ready for sex yet, whatever that was.

But Ginger told me not to move. "Show me your penis Johny". I said "What for?"

She said "I want to see it." and she came up to me and pulled it out of my pants and underwear and I let her because I had this feeling, like something was growing in my gut, a wave of that warm honey feeling and a hardness in the cock. "Play with yourself Johny"" She said, and I said "How?". "Like this Johny" and she wrapped her little fist around my twitching penis and then she moved her little hand up and down the shaft. I moved her hand away and did the same.

Suddenly I was all alone with my feelings. They rose up in my gut like a balloon in the water. I burst my first orgasm all over Gingers face. "Wow, Johny" she said as she wiped the sticky liquid out of her mouth and nose, "you really got a cold" she said.

I didn't go directly home. I took a walk, going no where in particular, just exploring the apartment complex in which I lived.

There were all sorts of people here. I walked by the two story buildings and tried to see where I could, what the houses looked like within, behind the curtains that hung across the windows and gliding doors of the cheap rented flats. I always felt somewhat envious of these other people, there seemed to be something more normal about them than I felt about my own life. It was almost as if they were real people and I was some kind of imposter. I did not know why I felt this way, I had no idea. I did not connect this feeling with the fact the I was always a newcomer, that I had moved so many times in my short life no place seemed like home. These other people looked like they belonged where they were, while I had not lived anywhere long enough to feel I belonged there. Just when I was beginning to feel at home, we had moved again.

One of the families that lived on the first floor was cooking on the patio. I wasn't really hungry, but the smell of the barbecue caught my attention and I stood at a distance, watching the comings and goings of the people there. There was a mother, who was not pretty like my mother. This woman was short and chubby and she wore her hair in a bun that was stuck on top of her head. There were two children who were older than I, they seemed so mature they must be at least in college. They lay sprawled on the patio furniture reading comic books and a hairy dog lay lazily between them. The boy was reading Batman and the girl was reading Archie.

The father stood by the barbecue and watched over the cooking meat, while the mother went back and forth with things she set on the big wooden table.

I stood not twenty feet from them but they didn't seem to notice me and I wondered if I was invisible. In my mind I imagined that they called me over and invited me to eat with them. Later I would go inside and watch television. The girl would be very nice to me and the boy would take me with him to meet all his mature friends and I would do all sorts of mature things like hanging out at the Mall at the arcade.When we came home his mother would wash us with warm towels, she would stick her finger up my tight ass hole to clean it real well before she stuck her sons cock up in it. I would be sucking on her husbands big fat piece of fuck meat as he licked his daughters asshole, too. I started seeing things in my mind's eye, stuff I never saw before. My cock was getting so stiff it hurt.

It was the family’s dog that first noticed me. The dog raised a long eared shaggy head and looked at me straight in the eye.The dogs penis was hard and I backed off.

I stared back at the dog and the dog barked twice. I started walking home. I had that feeling again, like a lump in my throat.

When I got home my mother was waiting for me alone in my room. She looked very upset but not at me. She was drunk and talking strange. She said "what did you say to Ginger" and I said Ginger taught me how to feel good. "What?", she said. "How"

I took my cock out and started rubbing it. "Like this." I said. My mother said "stop, I told you not to do that.", but I didn't care any more. "Here you go", I said, and shot a quick load of cum right into my mommie's eye.

And you know what, I didn't go blind. But she did.