Self-Discovery Trek Pt. 03

He looked at me quizzically, then mildly perturbed, then hurt. "Are you kidding me? I would never have made it without you this last month. I'd be a vegetable and Melissa would be without a father and without a biological mother, although she had an adoptive mother in you."

That comment almost knocked me over.

"I want you as part of our lives forever. Tell me – did you read the codicil to Joyce's will?"

"No, I...well, I don't think so," I stuttered.

"You would have remembered it if you did. Someday – not now – I'll show it to you," he replied.

That night David and I slept together. No sex, just reveling in body contact with someone we loved who was an important part of Joyce's life.

_______________

There were things that I needed to clear up at home. Melissa would be released in seven-ten days, and I wanted to be there when she was and fulfil as many "motherly" duties as possible. David had gone back to work, but from discussions with his partners, as well as personal observation, I knew that his heart wasn't in it. I knew that it would take drastic action to snap him out of it.

On my trip home I had a heart-to-heart with myself. I was feeling guilty because I coveted David, and felt that that was disrespectful to my loving departed friend, Joyce. I wondered whether my devotion to Melissa and all of the arrangements I had made regarding Joyce's farewell were to assuage my guilt, to endear myself to David, or just out of loyalty to Joyce even in death. I honestly admitted that it was all of the above and that my preoccupation with my motives was counterproductive. While Candace would have agonized about it another few months, Amber put it out of her mind by the time that her plane touched down on the East Coast.

I cleared up everything that I needed to at home, including attending the only court appearance necessary to officially have my name changed to "Amber Joyce Wells," and returned to the West Coast the day before Melissa was released.

The first two weeks after Melissa's release Joyce's mother and I took care of her full time, helped by a part-time experienced nanny. Joyce's mother treated me like I was her own daughter, and Melissa's real mother – for which I was very grateful. After that David's mom visited for two weeks, and she treated me like I was her daughter-in-law and also Melissa's real mother.

I got very attached to that little girl, and she to me. She was doing great, too, and growing like a weed.

David was not doing as well. Except for his time with Melissa he seemed to be going through the motions. While he and I occasionally slept together when he was having a particularly hard day we never had sex. I can't tell you how agonizing that was for me.

I consulted with both a psychiatrist and a psychologist about my plan to get David back into the game. Both saw risks but agreed that it was the best course possible without the passage of years. So, when Melissa was five months old – and doing great – Joyce's and David's mothers, and the part-time nanny (Mrs. Smith), as well as Jack, the managing partner of David's law firm, were waiting in his condo when he arrived home.

"Moms; Mrs. Smith; Jack – what are you doing here?" was his startled inquiry when he walked into the room.

"You and I are hiking the majority of the Pacific Crest Trail that lies in Oregon, David. We leave tonight. The car is packed with our backpacks, the two grandmoms and Mrs. Smith have guaranteed great care for Melissa, and Jack has arranged for others to take over all of your cases in the roughly two weeks that we'll be gone," I authoritatively said with my arms crossed.

"I can't do that," he rebuked with a significant amount of irritation in his voice.

"Yes, you can," Jack shot back.

"Yes you can, and I'd love it if you would," Joyce's mom said, cradling Melissa, her favorite thing on earth.

"Yes you will," said David's mom, sounding like a drill sergeant. We had arranged for her to be the heavy. She had raised three active boys, and didn't take shit from anyone. "No woman will ever want you the way you are now. You need to get away and get your head clear, and your butt kicked, and Amber is just the person to do it. We'll feed you dinner and then you're on your way."

David was at a loss for words. He looked each of us in the eye, in turn. He seemed to be taken aback by the steely looks we returned.

"You sent me on a trek of self-discovery when I needed it most. Now you're going, but since we, and Melissa, don't have four months for you to get your act together I'm going along to facilitate," I said, softening my tone a little, but not much.

Just then the doorbell rang.

"Chinese carryout," David's mom chirped.

I answered the door, paid the delivery guy, and with Jack's help carried the obscene amount of food that we had ordered to the already set dining room table. We all chowed down, during the meal passing Melissa from one to the other, even including Jack, although he handled her like she was a live grenade.

David kept glancing at all of us, probably looking for some lack of resolve. When he didn't find it he seemed to shrug his shoulders, really packed the Gung Pow Chicken, fried rice, and Orange Beef away, and changed into an outfit similar to mine.

Just before we left I saw David talking to his and Joyce's mothers and putting a piece of paper in his wallet, while I went over final procedures with Mrs. Smith and Jack was graciously clearing the table and filling the dishwasher. Everyone said goodbye to us as we pulled out of the parking lot at about 8:30 in the all-wheel drive Jeep that I had purchased for the occasion and would later give to charity, and we were off.

David was quiet for the first fifteen minutes or so as I drove along. Then he turned to me and with a sly grin said, "You could have at least given me some warning, or some say in the matter, you know. You're a manipulative little bitch, aren't you?"

"Hell yeah –I had two good teachers; the Burns couple I believe their name was," I sneered. "Now that you're through whining like a petulant little girl, if you'd like to see where we're going get the map out of the glove compartment."

______________

The scenery on the Pacific Crest Trail – particularly the roughly one hundred miles of it that I had laid out – was breathtaking. It was a little brisk at night, and of course – being Oregon – was occasionally wet, but we were making good progress. David seemed to visibly relax by the third day. That night, as we were finishing up a simple dinner in front of a campfire he kept staring at me.

"What are you staring at, dipshit?" I politely inquired.

"I'm just wondering how long I'm going to be able to resist fucking you," he snickered.

"What makes you think that I'll let you?" I responded with a sneer on my face.

"What makes you think that I'll give you a choice," he shot back.

"What makes you think that I won't cut of your balls in the middle of the night?" I smugly replied.

"Because I gave you the best sex you've ever had," he retorted with a superior grin.

"I was lying to Joyce when I told her that because I knew that you were eavesdropping and I just wanted to build you up because I know how sexually insecure you are," I countered. I had to adjust my shorts a little to accommodate the emerging wetness in my crotch.

David bounced up, grabbed me by the shoulders, lifted me up, and gave me an out-of-this-world kiss. I couldn't help but throw my arms around him.

He gently, but definitively, undid my pants while engaging me in a second passion-filled lip lock, then turned me around, walked me over by and then bent me over a fallen tree, and unceremoniously shoved his cock up my expectant pussy. He fucked the shit out of me as I held onto the fallen tree for dear life, groaning and swearing as his beautiful cock pounded in and out of my swollen, leaky cunt.

As my second mammoth orgasm hit me I could feel him tensing up and about to unload in me. I thought "This is only the fourth time that this guy has fucked me and it will be the third time that I pass out. Oh well...."

When I regained awareness and he pulled his dick out of me I swooned as he blew up just one air mattress, we lay on it face to face, and we covered ourselves with our blankets.

For the next ten days we fucked as often as our sore sex organs would let us, no matter what the weather, the time of day or night, position, or location. It culminated with us doing The Wheelbarrow, hard on one's hands in the wilderness, but oh, oh so satisfying!

The night before the end of that part of the trial that we were going to hike, as we finished dinner, David nonchalantly said "Well I guess that we have to get married."

"How romantic! Why is that, dipshit?" I inquired between bites.

"Well, Joyce's mother told me that if I didn't come back from our trek engaged that I was a damn fool. My mom wasn't so polite – she said come back engaged or she'll smack me upside the head."

"What makes you think that I have any interest in marrying you?" I shot back, still trying to be blasé.

"Because you start shaking, scream, and go limp every time that I fuck you," he replied, also trying to act blasé.

"Sex isn't everything," I responded.

"Well, there's another reason. You're obligated to by your sisterhood."

"What the hell does that mean, David?" I was no longer trying to act casual.

He reached into his wallet and pulled out a folded piece of paper and handed it to me.

"Codicil to the Last Will and Testament of Joyce D. Burns

I give the love of my life and my male soul mate David E. Burns to the best friend that a woman could ever have in life, and my female soul mate, Candace Wells Pingree; and vice-versa; along with my engagement and wedding rings. If you two don't live happily ever after I'll come back and haunt you. Just one caveat – David, don't you ever love her more than you did me."

I started sobbing uncontrollably, and dropped my plate on the ground. David sat next to me and held me in his arms. He was crying too, only not as hard as I was. When I finally started to recover, he got down on one knee, held out Joyce's engagement ring, and said "The former Candace Wells Pingree, now Amber Joyce Wells, will you do me the great honor of agreeing to marry me and adopt my daughter and bear me other children?"

Guess what my answer was.

________________

There is no use having money if you don't use it. I had already endowed a full scholarship in Joyce's name at my alma mater to be awarded to the woman with the most potential for good works. I asked Alisha and Cybil – my young friends from my trek of self-discovery – to help me make the choice of the first candidate and to help in the presentation of the full scholarship to the deserving young woman. She was a statuesque black girl from a housing project in Detroit with a glint in her eye and a kick ass personality.

Today was an even bigger day than the scholarship presentation. My four and a half year old daughter Melissa, my toddler David, Jr., the baby growing in my belly, and my husband David, were accompanying my fat preggo ass, and all of our family members, to the dedication of the Joyce D. Burns Memorial Park and Recreation Center. We had already been using the playground equipment every Saturday for the last few months, but the Rec Center had not been completed until last week, so that there had been no formal dedication yet.

As I finished my dedication speech and looked out on the crowd of happy young faces, of all shapes, sizes, and colors, and their giddy parents, I stopped for a moment. I squeezed the Joyce diamond hanging around my neck, motioned for my husband to join me, and yelled "Joyce says, let the fun begin!"