Serendipity Ch. 04

"Oh. That's nice I guess" I reply.

"I'll put it in the mini bar so it will be cold when we get back" he says. He comes over to me. Kisses me. "Let's get our boots on and go."

Since we've always headed to the riverfront, today we walk the opposite way. We come to a public market. We walk around to all the different little shops.

We buy some chocolate covered strawberries at the candy shop. We walk around for awhile longer and then stop for coffee.

"After today I'm not sure I can drink coffee" he says.

I look confused at him. "Why not?"

"You know coffee is always going to remind me of you. I make a pot every morning, I don't know if I'll be able to."

"Well that doesn't have to be a bad thing you know. It could give you good memories" I remind him.

He kisses me. "You're right. From now on it's all going to be good memories."

We stop at one last shop before we leave, The wine shop. He buys some outrageously expensive bottle of wine.

It's after four when we get back to the hotel. He sets the wine down on the coffee table. We both take our coats and boots off.

"So are we sitting in here? Going in the bedroom?" I ask him.

He walks over to me, wraps his arms around me. "Want to order pie again?" he asks teasing me.

"Wouldn't be the same. Let's sit out here and talk for awhile. Learn more about each other."

"We could do that. Drink the wine. Then the champagne. Get drunk and have sloppy sex on the sofa. Sloppy amazing sex" he says.

"I'll get the glasses" I say.

He pours us each a glass of wine. I take a sip.

"Wait. We need a toast" he says.

I smile. "Ok."

"Umm to what has been an amazing honeymoon. It couldn't have been any better" he says then taps his glass against mine.

Unless we were really married and this was a real honeymoon, I think. I refuse to think this crap tonight though. I will enjoy every last minute. Dwell on this stuff tomorrow.

"Oh hey, do me a favor" he says getting up. He gets his cell phone and hands it to me. "Put your number in there."

"Are you sure?"

He nods his head. "Yeah."

I think for a minute about handing his phone back to him and refusing. Or putting the wrong number in. But then I think, just maybe one day he'll be divorced, he'll call me and we can be together. And if he doesn't have any way to contact me, then it can't happen.

I hand it back to him after I'm finished.

"So. You're moving back to Illinois, any ideas what then?" he asks me.

"No idea. Get some dumb job probably. Something to make money so I can live somewhere."

"What about school? Any interest in going?" he asks.

"Not now. Maybe one day. Right now, honestly, I don't know what I want."

He looks at me. "Me either."

"When you go home, is anything going to change?" I ask him.

"No idea. She might look at my neck and throw me out. Or we'll keep going to counseling and things will work out and be great. Or we'll stay together and both be miserable the rest of our lives. And in all those scenarios, I don't see me ever being happy. Maybe she'll be happy though."

"Do you think you could be happy? What would make you live happily ever after?" I ask.

He pours himself another glass of wine, drinks all of it. "I don't know. Maybe nothing. What about you?"

"I don't know either."

"Let's quit the deep eternal life questions, focus on drinking and enjoying" he says.

I drink my second glass of wine, he drinks his third.

He fills our glasses one last time, drains the bottle.

"Should I get the champagne?" he asks.

"As much as I really feel like getting trashed tonight so I don't feel anything, I really want to remember every last detail. So maybe not now."

He sets his glass down on the table. Takes my glass from me and sets it down.

Smiles at me with that damned smile. That beautiful contagious smile. Not big enough to show the dimple, but still big enough to make me smile too.

I lean over and kiss him. On his perfect lips. We kiss. Kissing him makes my whole body tremble. He wraps his arms around me, pulls me closer. I put my arms around him.

He kisses my neck. "Want to stay here or go into the bedroom?"

As much as I think sex here on the sofa with him would be fun, I think I'd rather be in the bed. That way afterward we can lay there and snuggle. Maybe sleep in each other's arms for one last time.

"Let's get in bed. One last time."

"Yeah. One last time" he whispers.

He stands up and holds a hand out to me. I take it and follow him as he leads me to the bedroom.

When we get there we stand and kiss, like we did that first night.

He pulls at the bottom of my tee shirt, pulls it up. "Take this off. Take everything off."

I pull my shirt off over my head, drop it to the floor. My bra next. Then my jeans. I remember I still have socks on so I take them off too. When I'm standing there in just my underwear he kind of scowls at me.

"What about those?" he asks.

"What about you? Are you taking anything off?"

"Not right now. Right now I want you to lay down. I want to find out what you like" he says.

I sigh. "I don't know about this. I might just feel too weird to relax."

"I want to make you feel good. I know you had an amazing orgasm that first night, but you haven't since then. I want to take care of you."

"Will it sound dumb to say I feel good when I make you feel good?" I ask him.

"No. But I do feel kind of guilty to get off every time, and you're not. I want you to be satisfied."

I kiss him hard on the lips. "Take your damn clothes off and get in bed with me."

I take my underwear off, get in bed and watch him. He looks at me and smiles. He takes his clothes off and gets in bed with me.

We start kissing right away. That intense kind of kissing where you feel like you can't get enough of the person. He's leaning into me, pushing me over to my back. I roll to my back. He's between my legs and inside of me as soon as I do.

I kiss his neck.

After four strokes he slightly laughs. "Fuck."

He lays next to me. "That sucked didn't it?"

I look at him. Is he seriously finished? I can't help but smile. "Yeah it did."

"I suck at fucking when I'm drunk" he says.

He picks up his phone, "Smile" he says and takes a picture of us laying there.

I hear my phone vibrate telling me I have a text. I look over at him.

"I wanted you to have it too. And now I know you gave me your real number."

I shake my head at him. Silly silly boy.

I roll over with my back to him so he'll snuggle into me, he does.

I wake up when he takes his arm off of me. I grab it and try to pull him back to bed with me.

He kisses my cheek. "Sorry. Too much wine."

I laugh. Fall back asleep.

When I wake up again I wonder how long I've been asleep since he's still not in bed. He can't still be in the bathroom.

I roll over to face his side of the bed. When I see a piece of paper on his pillow I feel like someone punched me in the stomach. Tears in my eyes already and I haven't even picked it up.

I sit up, pick up the piece of paper and read it.

I figured this was the best way to do this. I hate goodbyes and I know this one would be the hardest one ever for me.

I can't describe how wonderful this week has been. I hope it was the same for you.

I don't want to say goodbye, that seems so final, so how about, until next time?

I've made the arrangements for you to get home, just tell the concierge when you're ready to leave.

E

I look over to where our suitcases were. Mine is there, alone. There's nothing on the floor where our clothes had been scattered. I get up and unzip my suitcase to look in it. He packed my stuff.

I need to get dressed, go home. The thought of that makes me sad. I start to sit on the bed to think. Cry. There's clothes on the end of the bed. He laid clothes out for me to wear. Now I really want to cry.

I get dressed, get my suitcase and go down to the lobby.

They have a car waiting for me to take me home. The driver puts my suitcase in the trunk. The doorman holds the back door open for me. I get in and we drive away.

Final:

It's been a week. I sometimes think I dreamed the whole thing. I actually thought he might call, but I'm guessing not since I haven't heard anything.

I have one of the shirts I wore when I was with him. Haven't washed it. It smells like him.

I need to finish packing if I'm going to move back to Illinois. I'll miss Wisconsin. I haven't been here long, but I really like it here. There's nothing to keep me here now though. I know no one, I have no job, nothing here.

I'll probably move in with Michelle until I get a job and can get my own place. I feel bad taking over her living room, but I'd rather do that then to move home and have to listen to my mom remind me that she said it was not a good idea to move so far away for a man I didn't know much about.

The day drags on. I start to box some stuff but I didn't bring much when I moved here.

This is boring, I decide to go out for coffee.

I smile when I put my coat on. The coat he bought me. My fuzzy mittens he picked out. He said they were a perfect match to my green eyes.

I look at the picture on my phone. The only picture of us. Laying in bed, our heads next to each other. Smiling at the camera. I was so happy, I think he was too.

It's nice in the coffee shop. I sit and people watch. I get jealous though that everyone is with someone. I'm the only person sitting here alone. And of course coffee reminds me of him. If it wasn't for coffee and me dropping it, we would have never met.

When I finish my coffee I order a brownie to go. As long as I'm going to sit around and be sad, I'm going to enjoy myself while doing it.

I stop to get my mail before I go up to my apartment. There's a little box in my mailbox.

The mailman probably stuck it in the wrong box. I look at the name and address, it's mine. I turn the box over, no return address. Weird.

I take it and the rest of my mail, bills of course, up to my apartment.

I toss the bills in the basket on the counter. I really need to sort through them soon and see which ones I can pay.

I sit on the sofa and set the box on the coffee table in front of me. I just look at the box. What could it be? Who is it from? Probably some stupid free sample from somewhere.

I get my brownie out, break off a piece and stick it in my mouth.

I pick up the box and shake it. Nothing. And it's so light I'm starting to think it's empty. I'm never going to know until I open it, so I guess I should.

I eat another piece of brownie first.

I unwrap the paper around the box. It's just a plain white box. I open it. There's a small box in it. A box like jewelry comes in. There's also a folded up piece of paper in the bottom of the box.

I take the jewelry box out and open it. Inside is a little container like you get out of a gumball machine. Inside is a ring. A cheap little plastic ring with a fake green jewel in it. Strange. Who would send this to me and why?

I unfold the paper.

I realized I never gave you a ring before our honeymoon. If we're married I want you to have a ring. I knew you wouldn't want a big diamond or gold ring so I wasn't sure what to get. Then I saw this and knew it was perfect. Green like your eyes.

I miss you.

E

Tears run down my cheeks. I miss him too. I slide the ring on my finger, he's right, it's perfect.

I have to talk to someone about all of this. I need to tell someone. I haven't told anyone. I felt horrible about having an affair with a married man. But for those few days I felt special. I felt like someone loved me for who I am. I felt more loved in those days than I ever felt for the guy I moved here with.

I call Michelle, I start crying again as soon as she answers.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?" she asks.

I sniffle and try to get some words out. "I fell in love and it will never work."

"When did this happen? And with who? Why can't it work?" she asks.

"Thanksgiving when I was stuck here. I met a guy at the airport. I spent that whole week and weekend that I was supposed to be home, at a hotel with him" I explain.

"That's who I kept hearing that day you called? On Black Friday."

"Yeah. That was him. He just had woken up. He came and found me talking to you" I say.

"Ok so why can't it work? Does he not live there? You know long distance relationships can work if both people want it to" she says.

"He lives in Florida, but that's not the problem. He's married."

"Oh. Well. That's not like you at all. Why did you stay with him if you knew he was married?" she asks.

"I don't know. It all fell into place perfectly. If he wasn't married I would think I had met my soul mate."

"So he's married, like really married? Not separated or anything?"

"Nope, he's married. He went home to her. I feel empty, how stupid is that?"

"It's not stupid. What did you think would happen? Did you think he would leave his wife?" she asks.

"Honestly, I never thought about anything while we were together except what was going on that minute. And then we each went our separate ways, and of course I cried. I was just starting to get over him and then I got a package in the mail from him today and all the feelings came back."

"What did he send you?" she asks.

"A ring. It's actually a cute story. He had booked a hotel room already, and it was a honeymoon suite. He says he likes to book them because you get complimentary champagne and stuff. We pretended we were married and on our honeymoon. So today I get a package in the mail. I open it and there's a little jewelry box in it. I open the jewelry box and there's a gumball machine container in it, and in it was a cheap little ring from a gumball machine. He said it was perfect for me, and it is."

"Ok so now what do you want to happen?" she asks.

"I don't know. I guess nothing. I don't want to get hopeful because when we were together and he called his wife a few times he told her he loved her, so I guess I was a weekend thing. He told me he had never done it before, but I will never know if he has or not."

"Yeah. And really would you want to be with a man who has no problem cheating? If he did it to her he would do it with you too" she says.

I sigh. "I know you're right, but at the time it was perfect."

"So throw the ring away, forget about him. When are you planning on coming back? He won't have your address so you won't get anything else in the mail from him. Does he have your phone number?" she asks.

"Yeah. But he hasn't called. It's been a week. I think if he was going to call he would have by now."

"Throw the ring away. Just concentrate on packing and moving back. Starting over. Everything will work out. I'll make sure it does. You know I love you and want you to be happy, with him you're only going to get your heart broken, even worse than it already is" she tells me. I know she's right.

I look at the ring. I can't just throw it away. I know he picked it out just for me. Even if I never hear from him again it's so nice to know he's still thinking about me.