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"Wow."
I'm shaking my head, half in disbelief and half in admiration.
Sadie has this smug little "aren't I clever?" grin on her face. She's looking utterly adorable. "Pretty neat, huh?" she says.
It is.
I quiz her hard on the details and she has all the answers. The wicked little bitch has really thought this thing through. Yep, it all sounds crazily feasible. It's sick and it's risky but I'm up for it.
"So, million dollar question ... when?" I ask her.
She thinks for a moment. "Saturday."
"This Saturday?"
"Yeah."
"Ok, what time?"
"Come at midnight."
"Ok."
"Wanna run through it with me again?" Sadie asks. "No mistakes, right?"
"Yes, I think I'd better."
So we do. We game it out a few more times, refine and develop until it's what you'd definitely call a plan.
Then I have to get going. There's only just enough time for a quick shag on the couch before she drives me back. She slips a loose skirt on for the trip and leaves her knickers off so I can tickle her leaking fanny as we cruise along.
"Ok, sugar, Saturday," she says, as I'm getting out of the car.
"Saturday," I grin.
She winks at me and drives off.
Once or twice over the rest of the week I think about backing out. But I haven't.
Which is why I find myself here now, man in the mask, crouched in the bushes outside their place at midnight on Saturday.
I'm kitted out in black and I'm tooled up. In the bag there's cuffs and a knife - a long sharp one. There's a few other things too.
I'm excited as hell but also nervous. Ok, she's run me through it a hundred times (they'll be in bed; there's a ladder out back; she'll have carelessly left the bathroom window unlocked; she'll have accidentally switched the alarm off; I make sure to keep my face covered until after I've thrown Frank in the closet; Frank won't involve the cops if I scare him enough, if I tell him I'll come back and kill them both if he does) but still, this is not something you do every day.
Sadie reckons it'll be a piece of cake but I'm not so sure. Is it really gonna work?
Let's find out, shall we?
Couple of deep breaths, a swig from the flask, and I'm ready to roll.
- COMMENTS
Anonymous9 months agoThe composition is good, the dialogue sounds like it should when two egomaniacs bond over narcissistic, nihilistic behavior; sequencing of the plot development proceeds in a logical fashion, and...with the personalities firmly established, the sadistic plan for torturing the husband is also logically the next step in the two MCs' amoral lives.
Checked "Like It" but really didn't. Kept expecting that the sexual intimacy would turn their lives into something more--make them into real people, actually become erotic rather than rote sex. But the writer's intent (as stated from the beginning) focused on the depth of their self-absorption, and giving credit where it is due, fully accomplished that goal.
Kudos on your writing skill. But your plot sucks. You have the ability--please write something with more substance.
MLJ
