Show Me Yours

Jimmy tried tapping out before he came. He tapped my shoulder, "I'm going to cum," he said. I didn't stop. Why should I? I wanted him to cum inside my mouth. I had done it to him at least a dozen times, he should be allowed to do it to me, too. "I mean it," he said, trying to squirm away. There was no where for him to go and it quickly became too late for him to try moving away. He came and I'll admit it, I was instantly hooked. Maybe it was because of all the times I had aimed my cock at my mouth, I don't know, but something in me knew this was something I wanted to do again and again.

And that's precisely what we did, that night and for the rest of that summer after high school.

College was a different experience. Though I had been good at track in high school, I wasn't good enough for the college team. It didn't matter. Being a jock didn't feel as important in college as it had in high school. And there were women, lots of women. Women in every shape, size and color. If I had been concerned that blowing Jimmy had made me gay, my freshman year proved otherwise. I dated, a lot and getting pussy was the least of my concerns. Funny thing is, I don't remember ever being concerned about being slightly gay or bisexual or whatever.

Sometimes, when I had my dorm room to myself, I would still curl up in a ball, jerk-off in my face and think about sucking Jimmy. I did that a lot during my first year at college and I couldn't wait to go home and see Jimmy again. Except, somewhere after the summer had ended, Jimmy had lost interest in me. Jimmy had a boyfriend. I mean, a real boyfriend. He had come out as gay and suddenly, it felt strange having him as a friend. I guess I'm shallow, I don't know. Here's how I thought about it at the time and how I still think about it: Jimmy was like an ex-girlfriend. If you're not getting it from her anymore, why stay friends with her?

Summer came and went. I returned to school and a new roommate, Todd. Until then, I had never questioned my sexuality. I was straight. I knew I was straight. Never mind that I had jerked off and sucked Jimmy more times than I ever counted. I had also fucked twice as much pussy. Hell, more than that! If I were to add up all the sex I had with Jimmy and compare it to all the sex I had had with multiple women, I'm sure I would have wound up straighter than gay.

It was during our first couple weeks back in college that Todd came out to me. "My family doesn't know. Hell, most of my friends back home don't know. But I do," he told me. Until then, I hadn't thought about it. Todd felt like a regular guy. He was into sports. He liked action movies. He drank beer whenever we scored it. He told dirty jokes and worked out regularly.

"How do you know?" I asked. It felt like a stupid question, but he shrugged off the stupidity of it.

"Girls don't do anything for me," he explained. "I mean, I didn't want to be gay. I tried being straight. I used to try jerking off to straight porn, but I always found myself watching the guy and being jealous of the girl."

"What about lesbian porn?"

"Ew," he said, laughing.

"Have you, you know, been with a guy?"

"A couple," he admitted. "And it felt good. It felt right, you know? I mean, how do you know you're straight."

"I don't," I said, coming face-to-face for the first time with my sexual identity.

Todd stared at me for a long beat. His brown eyes searched my face for a hint of a prank being played before he felt convinced enough to ask, "What's that mean?"

"It means, I've done, um, stuff with another guy."

"Circle jerks at camp don't count."

"Do blowjobs?" I asked. That got his attention.

"Giving or receiving?"

"Both," I admitted and he gave me a big, pretty smile that showed gleaming white teeth in neat rows from wearing braces as a teen.

"Then welcome to the family." We toasted our commonness before that bond was broken by his next question. "So, do you do women, too?"

"Yeah," I said without thinking much about it. Jimmy never seemed to care, why should Todd?

"Aw, that's too bad," he said. I didn't understand. For whatever reason, it mattered to Todd and that confused me. He asked if I would date a girl who went both ways. Of course, I would. Hell, at the time, I even thought I would enjoy it! Then he asked if I would date a guy who went both ways.

"I'm not sure I want to date a guy," I said.

"And that's why I don't do bi-guys," he said. "You're fickle. You don't know what you want."

"Maybe I just haven't found what I want yet."

"And when you do, she'll wear a skirt without a dick inside of it."

That felt true. Like most guys, I had never given much thought to getting married. If a woman mentioned it, I would change the topic. Still, I had always assumed that when the time came, I would find a woman and settle down. That's what people do, isn't it?

Except gay people. They don't find a mate of the opposite sex, do they? But that doesn't mean they don't want to fall in love and set-up housekeeping as a partnership. I didn't get that at the time. I didn't get much, except I thought Todd was hot and I wanted him, even if he didn't want me.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" I asked. He didn't. He said he didn't risk having one with his situation back home. He grew up with that "old time religion" being bible-thumped into him whether it fit or not. While he had learned better, his friends and family hadn't. His pain was easy to see.

Todd and I were roommates, not lovers. Anyone who has had to live in communal living knows that sometimes you have a roommate and sometimes you have a roommate that becomes a friend, too. Todd and I became friends. Maybe not the best of friends, but we joked around. We would watch sports together, drink together and all that other "guy" stuff. He dated around. Nothing serious. Todd had a knack for lusting after straight guys. I kept dating, too, though I didn't talk much about my dates.

I'll admit guys are funny. I tried to explain it once to a girlfriend. She didn't get it. Guys love differences. The tallest guy is always called something like "Stringbean." The fattest guy in the room gets called "Slim." Someone with a reputation for having a big dick gets called "Horse." We all do it. It wasn't any different in our room of two. Todd would accuse me of being gay and I would tell him, "You know, you're the straightest gay guy I know," as I made fun of his lack of fashion sense.

I don't think it was a secret how I lusted after Todd. Sure, it wasn't going to happen, I knew it wouldn't. Todd might lust after straight guys, but he wanted a straight guy to go gay for him, permanently gay. He didn't want a confused guy like me. Confused was his way of teasing me about my sexuality. I didn't care. It was all in good fun.

Sometimes, I missed Jimmy. Okay, that's not true. I missed being with another guy. Meeting Todd made me realize there was more guy fun out there than I had considered. Worse, knowing Todd made me want some dick more than when I was with Jimmy. It got to where I couldn't stop thinking about it. More than once, Todd would catch me watching gay porn on my computer. "Really dude?" he'd laugh. "You trying to tease me or are you still confused?"

"Maybe both," I began saying."How did things ever happen between you and Jimmy?" Todd asked. I told him the story. "So, he seduced you with straight porn?" I nodded. I hadn't thought about it that way, but Todd was right. "So, you think those vids are still online?"

"Probably," I said, keeping it low key. I knew they were. I fired up my browser, surfed to the website Jimmy used to use and began playing one of the vids.

"It would be hotter if that was me in the middle," Todd grinned, rolling his desk chair closer and watching with me.

"Jimmy used to point out the dicks," I said and tried my hand at talking up the guys. "Yeah, baby, take that big dick. Doesn't that feel good in your mouth? Oh, you like sucking big dick, don't you?"

"And that got you hard?"

"Still works," I said, rubbing the lump inside my boxer briefs. It was late on a lazy Saturday morning and neither of us had dressed. We watched until the end of that vid when it occurred to me why Todd was interested. "You're hoping to seduce some straight guy, aren't you?"

"Maybe," he admitted with a rakish grin. "Are there more like that one?"

"Lots more," I said, starting the next one. I watched without providing a commentary.

"He has a nice cock," Todd mentioned as the girl on screen bobbed her head up and down a fatter dick.

I accused him of being a size queen before pointing out how he can't talk directly about the dicks. "You have to say it more like, 'Oh yeah, baby, suck that fat prick. You know you like it.' You have to keep the focus on her as much as the guy."

Todd nodded. "Would you get hard?"

"We were eighteen, we both got hard."

"Yeah, but you're rubbing yourself. Did you do that with Jimmy, too?"

"At some point, we did," I said, unclear remembering when we started doing that. "We were usually drunk, too."

"Who pulled it out first?"

"He did," I lied, skipping over how things really went down. "He said something like, 'Man, I'm so fucking horny,' and stuck his hand inside his shorts." I demonstrated. That was sort of true. "Then, a bit later, he said something like, 'I can't stand this,' and whipped it out." I demonstrated my lie, pushing my boxer shorts down my thighs and displaying my hard-on. I caught Todd checking me out and I felt an excited jolt surge through me.

"No shit," Todd said, chuckling. "What did you do?"

"At first, nothing, except I was drunk and really hard." I was off Jimmy's script. "He said something like, 'I showed you mine,' or something." That felt lame. I glanced at Todd. He looked like he was still buying it except he wasn't doing anything. I pulled up my shorts.

"You don't have to do that," he mumbled.

"You have to do it with me," I said, smiled and added, "That's how Jimmy did me, too. He said he wasn't going to be the only one jerking off and if I didn't want to do it, too, that was cool, but then he wasn't going to do it, either."

"And you really wanted to jerk-off, didn't you?"

"Yeah," I sighed. I sure as shit wanted to jerk-off, right that moment, with Todd. "Damn, she loves that cum," I said, nodding at the mouthful of creamy white goo coating the actress's tongue she displayed for the camera before swallowing. I kept rubbing my prick before asking Todd, "Are we going to do this?"

"Do what?"

"Man, it's as if you were in the room with us! That's the same thing I said to him!" I know, I was making it up as I went along, but this wasn't about Jimmy anymore. "Are we going to jerk-off or not?"

"You can if you want to," he said with a shrug and a confused looking grin. Could he guess what was happening?

"Yeah, I said the same thing." I forced my hand away from my hard cock straining against the stretchy fabric of my boxer briefs and stared at the video playing until it ended. It was difficult keeping my hands away from my hard cock, but I managed it. Trust me, I saw how many times Todd checked to see if I was still hard. When the vid ended, I clicked my home button and went back to surfing sport stories.

"That's it?" Todd asked.

"What? Did you expect me to jerk-off in front of you?"

"You want to, don't you?"

"Who is he?" I asked.

"It is that obvious?" Todd asked, laughing. He told me about the guy in one of his classes, a straight guy, a guy he hoped to seduce. "So, when things happened with Jimmy, you were drunk, didn't care and jerked off with him, didn't you?"

"Something like that," I said, unwilling to play along if he wasn't going to play, too.

"That's hot," he said. "Thanks." He rolled his chair back in front of his desk, leaving me hard, aching and needy.

Ten minutes passed and my need never left me. "You're a dick," I said, heading back to the x-rated video site.

"Sorry," he said. The big smile on his face made it clear he didn't feel that way.

I started a new vid and watched for a few minutes before I pulled off my boxer briefs. Todd glanced over at me, smiled and rolled his eyes. "No control."

"Fuck you," I said and went about my business. I toyed with my cock and balls, nursing my thrill instead of quickly taking care of business. I could have gotten off quickly. I was excited enough to rub one out in record time. Instead, I pulled off my shirt and took my time. Todd kept glancing in my direction. I'd say I didn't care except that would be another lie. I did care. I liked him checking me out and I wanted him to keep doing it. A droplet of pre-cum oozed from my cock head. I scooped it up with a fingertip and tasted it. I missed that taste.

"Did Jimmy do that, too?"

"Taste his pre-cum?" I asked without looking at Todd. "Nah, we were too excited. There was no pre-cum involved. We just jerked off and came."

"OK," Todd said and it looked as if he finding it difficult to keep his eyes on his computer instead of on me. I kept up my tease as long as I could, which wasn't much longer. I was too hard, too excited. I needed an orgasm and knew it was a waste of time to hold back. I pulled harder and faster on my swollen cock until nature took its course. I came, splashing my cumshot into my left hand and coating my palm. After the last shiver finished surging through me, I licked my palm clean. "Cumslut," Todd said with a tiny laugh.

I scooped up a last drop clinging to my peehole and swallowed that, too. Standing, I stretched while facing Todd. "It's the best part of waking up," I said, rubbing my balls. I was still hard. Hell, I should be, I had just orgasmed and guys don't go soft immediately, though it was more than that for me. I'm able to stay hard after my first orgasm, I've always been able to do that. I had never thought much about it because that's just the way I'm made. Girls seemed to like it because I would have an orgasm and keep going until I had a second orgasm. Jimmy had liked it, too. "Guess I'll take a shower," I said, picking up a towel and heading into the bathroom. I wore the towel around my shoulders and left my hard-on on display.

I got dressed after my shower. I wasn't heading anywhere and I dressed for hanging out in the room, in shorts, no underwear and another t-shirt. Todd still sat his computer, writing something. About ten minutes later, he asked me, "Did Jimmy ever touch you that first time?"

"No," I admitted, playing it straight about my past gay experiences. "We jerked off together. We did that several times before he finally touched me."

"You have to get him naked and horny first. Getting drunk might help, too."That evening, Todd returned to the dorm room with beer and a friend in tow. Brent was skinny and looked like a hipster. I wasn't impressed. Todd could do better. I drank one beer with them while figuring out how to give them some privacy and not letting on that I was pissed off. I wished Todd had warned me about bringing home a friend. I made a comment about needing to leave soon when Todd surprised me. "You should stay," he said. I'm sure I looked as confused as I felt. "We're not going to do anything except hang-out and drink beer."

"You sure?" I asked.

"Hey, do you remember how to hook-up your laptop to the TV?" he asked, handing me another beer. That's when I noticed the box of beer they had brought back to the room was half empty and I guessed they had gotten a head start on me.

"We gonna watch some porn?" Brent asked, slurring his speech a bit as it came out as, "We gonna watsh shome porn?" Todd assured him we were. "OK, I gotta pee first." Brent went into the bathroom. At least he wasn't staggering.

"Help me," Todd whispered as soon as Brent was gone. "If we do it, maybe he'll do it, too."

"Do what?" I asked, still playing catch-up.

"Jerk-off? Maybe more?"

"He's going to think we're both gay."

"So?" he asked, grinning at me. "You're half-gay, right?" And that's when Brent came back from the bathroom.

We had rearranged our room from the standard layout for the sophomore dorms. Todd's bed was against the wall with the window to it. There was a nightstand and then my bed was against the side wall, forming a L-shape of our beds. Across from my bed is where we had put our desks. Between our desks, within easy reach, sat our dorm room sized refrigerator that doubled as a TV stand for Todd's flat screen. I ran a HDMI cable between my laptop and the TV.

"What kind of porn are we going to watch?" I asked, though I had a good idea.

"Play one of those vids you showed me this morning," Todd said, tossing his pillows from his bed to mine. The three of us sat across my bed with our backs against the wall and using it like a big couch. Todd sat close to his bed and the nightstand. Brent sat between us and I sat at the foot of my bed where I had shoved the other nightstand. There was plenty of room between us. I loaded up the queue for website so I wouldn't have to keep getting up and turned off the overhead light before starting the show.

"Da-amn," Brent said as the first video started. The website didn't play around. The videos started right at the "good" parts. "Look at that bitch!"

"I know, man," I said, leading off the commentary. "She loves that dick, don't she?"

"Yeah she does," Brent said and tugged at the front of his shorts. No way was he already hard, was he? I glanced and guessed he was only making room for future growth.

"Look at how she's swallowing that fat dick," Todd added. I smiled and nodded. I don't know if he saw my reaction, but he had gotten it just right. "Yeah, she loves that cum, don't she?" he added as the first prick exploded inside her mouth.

"I like how she keeps tugging on two more dicks while she's swallow that first one," I pointed out.

"Is she gonna suck off all five of them?" Brent asked.

"Hell yeah," Todd said.

"Damn, that's a lot of dick."

"Yeah it is," I said and I felt myself getting hard again. These damn videos always did that to me. I could guess how Pavlov's dogs must have felt when they heard a ringing bell. How many times had Jimmy and I watched either these videos or ones just like them? I couldn't guess. How many more times had I jerked off, dreaming about being the chick in the center? I tugged at my shorts. Not expecting Todd bringing back company, I was still dressed for comfort by going commando inside my shorts. No way would I be able to hide the bulge inside my shorts.

"Damn, dude," Brent laughed, noticing. "Problem?"

"We watched an hour of these damn vids this morning," I said with a shrug. I pulled at the front of my shorts as if trying to rearrange things. My shorts were too loose fitting. There was no rearranging that would hide or disguise my condition. My hard-on tented my shorts and after a couple more beers and half a dozen more videos of hard cocks getting sucked by pretty girls, I didn't care.

My cock ached as if that morning's orgasm had never happened. My growing beer buzz wasn't helping. I knew Todd was using me to seduce Brent. At first, I didn't care. Around the time I popped the top of beer number three, I started resenting the idea. How fair was this to me? Todd was using my past experiences and my favorite jerk-off videos. And, he was using me, too.

I had tried pressuring Todd into jerking off with me that morning. It hadn't worked, but I had tried. Now, Todd was using that idea to pressure Brent into jerking off and maybe more. Brent was drunk and clueless. I was working on getting drunk, but I was far from clueless. Get the straight guy drunk and horny, get naked around him and see what happens. More than likely, Brent would get naked, too.

Todd wanted my help getting Brent into a compromising situation. Fine, I thought as I emptied beer number three into me and a new thought occurred to me. If Todd wanted my help getting Brent naked and hard, then Todd would have to play along. Wouldn't that put Todd in a compromising situation, too?