Someone to Watch Over Me

"I know, Bill," she said. "I know, and I am sure. What can I do to convince you of that?"

"I don't know," I said dully. "I don't know, but standing in the entryway isn't exactly the best place to discuss something that will completely change our lives. I'll make some tea and we'll sit down and talk it over, calmly and rationally. I'm not saying yes to the idea," I warned her. "Not until I'm totally convinced."

"OK" Annie said meekly. "... and why don't we change into something a bit less formal while we're at it?"

"Suits me fine," I said, giving her a last hug. "Meet you in the den in 15?" Annie and I find the den to be our favorite place to talk. It's as though the room invites you to have an open mind, which I got the feeling I was going to need this evening. I put on the tea kettle and then went upstairs to my bedroom to change. Annie's door was open and I could hear her moving around, changing clothes and putting things away. "Have I been that blind to her feelings?" I asked myself. "Was I so busy raising Annie, being her whole family to her, that I missed something she was trying to tell me for all these years?"

I was mulling this all over in my mind as I threw on some jeans and a denim shirt along with some old deck shoes - my normal weekend getup. I remembered how Annie didn't like these shoes, saying they "look so bad even Goodwill won't take them" and was just cinching up my belt when I heard the teakettle whistle in the kitchen. I hurried down the stairs to get the kettle off the burner. I was struck by a whim. I went into the dining room and got out the old Johnson Family silver tea service. Mom Johnson rarely used it except for special occasions, but if the bombshell that Annie had dropped on me didn't qualify as "special" then nothing would.

I measured out the Earl Grey into the teapot and poured the steaming water over it, filled the sugar bowl and poured milk in the cream pitcher. I was just setting two china cups on their saucers when I heard Annie coming down the stairs and walking into the den. "It's time," she called to me.

"I'm on my way," I called back and carried the tea service through the dining room and into the den.

*

Annie had seated herself in one of the two big leather wing chairs in the den, the one facing away from me. All I could see of her was her elbow when I came into the room with the tray. She was wearing a sweatshirt. As I came around the chair to set the tea service on the table between the two chairs in the den, I noticed she was an old pair of faded jeans and pink socks. Silently I breathed a sigh of relief. It was going to be hard enough to talk with her about her sexual desires for me, her romantic feelings for me, without the added distraction of sexy clothes.

"Grandmom's tea set," she giggled. "If I'd known you were going to get formal on me I wouldn't have suggested changing clothes." She was grinning at me. Her long blonde hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail. She looked a lot more like a little girl now than she had earlier.

*

As Annie poured the tea for us I thought back to years past when she would "make" me have a tea party with her and a couple of her dolls, and part of me wished for those simpler times when I was merely uncle to an innocent little girl. I took my cup from her dainty hand and sat back in my chair. The silence between us was deafening. I looked over the rim of my cup as I sipped. Annie was staring down at her cup, apparently lost in thought. Full of dread I leaned forward in my seat, elbows on knees, to face her.

Clearing my throat nervously, I looked deep into Annie's clear blue eyes. "Sweetie?" I said gently. "I don't know where to start this conversation ... I mean, well ..."

"I know, unk... I mean, Bill" She murmured. She was nervously toying with the handle of her cup. "I thought you knew how I felt. Guess I didn't make myself as obvious as I thought, huh?"

"Or maybe I'm just oblivious," I said. "But anyway, Annie... What's on your mind?"

Annie set her cup on the table and nervously twisted her hands together. "Do you remember that time when I was about nine and told you I was going to marry you?" I nodded, remembering how we'd all laughed it off as a little girl fantasy that she'd be sure to grow out of. "Well, I remember it too. Everyone thought I'd grow out of it, but I never did. I just kept it quiet so you and Mom and Dad and Aunt Laura wouldn't make fun of me, but I seriously always wanted you to be the man I married someday. ...and then, when they all died I just felt so guilty. I knew it wasn't because of me that it happened, but, but..." Annie broke into tears and it was several minutes before she regained her composure. I didn't interrupt. I was only supposed to listen.

"Even before they died, I guess I was only 12, and really becoming aware of the changes in my body... I uhm..." Annie looked down into her lap, blushing. "I noticed that my panties would get all wet when you were around, especially when you hugged me. I guess it was along in there that I discovered how good touching myself felt. I used to lie in my bed almost every night, toying with my nipples, imagining it was your lips on them; playing with my pu... self... and dreaming it was your hand instead of mine."

I was shocked, to say the least. The idea that my innocent niece had such a vivid sexual imagination at such a young age was certainly an eye-opener. But on another level, my mind's eye could picture her slim form, just budding into womanhood, her own hands roaming over her body and... whew! I struggled to keep down the erection that wanted to begin a tent in my jeans.

Annie was still talking. She had moved on to the night we celebrated her sixteenth birthday and I had jokingly said something about "sweet sixteen and never been kissed" and then given her a peck on the lips. I think that's the only time I'd ever kissed her lips and I had thought it was only part of a little joke. Annie apparently put much deeper significance on it. "I wanted you to kiss me again, kiss me deeper, but you didn't," Annie sighed. "My panties were soaking when I went to bed that night. I think I was up half the night, recalling the feel of your lips on mine. Not long after that, Ethan Birdwell kissed me at a party, but it just didn't feel right. I mean, Ethan's a nice kid but he's not you and I just didn't feel anything, you know?"

"My friend Amy, she and I talk about sex and boys and stuff a lot - Relax. I've never mentioned you. ...well anyway, she'd found one of her mom's vibrators and she loaned it to me. She said it would 'put me right up on the ceiling' so I brought it home with me, and well, I've had Sex Ed and I knew enough about penises to know this vibrator was the same size and all as an erection. I closed my eyes and slowly pushed it inside me, dreaming that it was you sliding your, uhm, dick into me, taking my virginity."

"Oh. One more thing. Right after Christmas, I had Amy's mom find me a doctor who would put me on the pill, so we could be safe. I mean, I may want children later on but not yet."

Amy looked at me again hoping for some kind of response but all I could do was stare at her, my mouth open in shock.

"The point is, unk, er, I mean, Bill. First of all, I love you. I love you so much that I know I'd die without you, and I want you to love me. I mean, I know you do love me, but I want it to be something more. I want to be yours, Bill. Forever. I don't want to be just Annie Johnson all my life. I want to be Mrs. Billy Barnett."

I'm sure it seemed like forever before I spoke, and even then I hardly felt eloquent. "I had no idea, Annie. I mean, uhm, wow, this is a shock." It really was a shock to hear her confess that she'd been masturbating and fantasizing about me for years while planning this night for who-knows-how-long. It took me a little while to collect my thoughts.

"First of all, Annie," I said as calmly as I could. "You have to realize how much of a surprise this is for me." She nodded. "And that, in a lot of people's eyes, what you're suggesting is at least chancy ethics even if it's not exactly illegal or immoral - which I'm not so sure it might not be."

"I don't care about what other people think, Bill," Annie stated matter-of-factly. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I reassured her. "That will never change, Annie."

"It better not!"

"It won't," I promised. "No matter what we decide to do. However, since you've had all these years to think about this and I've only had ..." I glanced at my watch. " ...forty-three minutes, I'm not going to say yes or no just yet." Annie looked deflated. I'm sure in her star-struck fantasy I would just say yes and we'd skip dreamily off to bed, hand in hand, and live happily ever after.

"Can you give me a day, Annie?" I asked. "This is a big decision, after all."

"Oh, alright," she sighed, rising from her chair. "Twenty-four hours." She looked at the clock on the mantle and then back into my eyes. "I'll even give you a few extra minutes. Let's say you tell me your answer by midnight tomorrow?"

I agreed to that and Annie left the den. I was lost in my thoughts as she went up the stairs to her room. I tried to think this through logically at first. All the negative points seemed obvious. Annie was my niece. I had raised her since she was 13. I was her legal guardian. I was her uncle. We were family.

What were the positive points? She loves me and I love her. Technically we aren't even related and she was, legally, an adult now. And, moral or ethical considerations aside, here was a willing woman whom I adored and cherished who had just confessed to me that she was strongly attracted to me sexually ...

Logic seemed to say no, but there were the emotional issues, too. The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt Annie, but would it hurt her more to say no than it would hurt her if I were to indulge her in this fantasy of hers and it went horribly wrong?

I thought about the kinds of boys Annie had dated. There weren't many. Most of them were boys that I thought were suitable for her, though - they seemed mature and level-headed, respectful. Most of them were college-bound and already had some goal in mind like being a doctor or an engineer. It struck me, strangely, that they all seemed to resemble each other. Tall, slender, dark-haired and clean cut. Some of them might have even passed as sons of mine, they looked so much like me.

As for me? I hadn't seriously dated at all. Working and raising Annie took most of my time and energy. Those few social engagements when I "had" to have a date I had usually managed to find one, though I never bedded any of them. Interestingly enough, these women bore a strange resemblance to my late wife - petite, blonde, blue-eyed, small-breasted women. Women who were built just like Annie.

If there was a message in that, I chose to ignore it for the time being. Looking at the clock, I realized I had been reasoning this out for almost two hours. I recalled something that Mom Johnson always said. "Sometimes the best way to think about something is to stop thinking for a while and get some sleep."

"You're right, Mom" I said out loud. I carried the tea set back to the kitchen, then wearily stumbled off to bed.

I fell asleep quickly, but my whole night's sleep was tortured by dreams, but I can't recall any of them but the last. I only know I dreamed. The only one vivid enough to remember was the one that awakened me. I was back in the church where Laura and I got married, and the preacher was saying "Do you take this woman to be your lawful wedded wife, to love, honor and cherish above all others so long as you both shall live?"

I said, "I do," as the tiny hand of the bride beside me squeezed my hand. When I looked up, though, the preacher had somehow been replaced by the smiling face of Dad Johnson. I looked around. The maid of honor wasn't Laura's friend Kathy - it was Laura herself! She smiled sweetly at me. The preacher, or Dad Johnson, or whoever he was, cleared his throat. "I told you to kiss the bride son. I suggest you get to it." With trembling fingers I lifted the veil over the bride's head, revealing Annie's bright blue eyes. I leaned down to kiss her.

I bolted upright in bed, covered with sweat and shaking. The covers had been kicked off the bed. The pillows were scattered. I checked the clock. It was almost noon. Twelve hours to go, but I knew what my answer would be.

I showered and shaved, threw on some jeans and a polo shirt. I peeked into Annie's room to see if she was there but she wasn't. I found a note on the board in the kitchen where Annie and I leave messages for each other.

Bill - I'm out with Julie Will be home by midnight. Can't wait! Love you! Annie *

Less than twelve hours! I headed for the mall for a quick shopping trip and my plan formed itself in my head as I went along. I wanted to show her what my answer was rather than put it into words.

I headed for one of the major department stores first where I found a silk robe for myself. Soft and sensual, but still masculine looking. Next I sought out a candle store and bought a basketful of candles all in the same scent - roses - a favorite of Annie's. After that I bought several dozen roses, all of them red, the color of passion and love. Mom Johnson had left plenty of vases and I began to think of how they hadn't been used nearly enough in the past 5 years.

I was mentally checking off things as I went through the mall: flowers, candles, robe, a stop for some chocolate covered strawberries took care of everything I could get at the mall. Just one more stop to go.

The final stop was probably not entirely necessary, but I wasn't taking any chances. Annie was, after all, mostly a virgin and I wanted to make sure her first time with me was comfortable and gentle. The lubricant I picked up at the adult book and novelty store was just a bit of insurance.

Then it was home again, where I spent most of the afternoon working off my nervous energy arranging the house, especially my bedroom, for what would happen when Annie returned. I filled the bedroom with vases of roses and candles all around. Then I showered and shaved, put on the silk robe and anxiously waited for midnight. When the time was closer, I lit the candles in the bedroom, then slipped downstairs to wait in the den, leaving just one lamp on between the two wing chairs.

I heard her key in the lock and my heart rate instantly doubled. Since the light in the den was the only light on in the house, she headed toward it. I almost gasped as she entered. She looked so beautiful, standing in the doorway. It wasn't how she was dressed - that was just a short skirt with a t-shirt with sandals. There was just a glow about her. Maybe it was the new light I was seeing her in and the decision I was going to announce to her. I could see her nervousness as she looked toward where I was sitting.

It seemed as though her eyes flicked from me, sitting (I hoped casually) in my wing chair, to the rose lying on the table beside me, then back to my face. I could see the nervousness turning to happiness as she took in the signs that added up to the answer she was hoping for. We gazed deeply into each others' eyes for a moment, then she came over and gently sat in my lap. It was like an electrical current passed between us when her soft form settled on me. She smiled shyly at me and then leaned in to kiss me softly.

It started out softly, at least. Then, as if by unspoken agreement, our mouths opened and our tongues searched each other out. The passion was instantly unleashed. Our arms wrapped around each other, my hands began stroking her slender body, first her back and sides, then searching out the swell of her hips and the fleshy globes of her buttocks and down along her thigh. As my hand came back up her thigh, it automatically slid beneath her short skirt. Suddenly I realized that Annie was wearing a thong. She shifted her hips as my hand traveled under her, and suddenly my fingers felt the moist warmth of her virgin slit, feeling the wetness of her through the small strip of cloth. Soon my fingers slipped under the tiny thong and found the source of all that moisture

Annie moaned as my fingers explored her secret recesses, then broke our kiss. I could see in her eyes that it was almost as if she was forcing herself to push away. As she rose from my lap I could see that her nipples were poking through the thin bra and light tank top she wore. Looking to her face I could see the desire burning in her eyes.

"Not here," she whispered. "Not this way. Come upstairs with me"

Taking my hand she pulled me up from my chair and led me to my bedroom. I could hear her sharp intake of breath when she caught sight of the candles and roses filling the bedroom. She sighed "That's so sweet"

Her eyes were bright as she turned to me - whether those were tears of joy or the brightness of lust, I couldn't tell. She looked up at me with an almost shy smile and stepped into my arms, burying her face against my chest. I could feel her trembling.

"Are you nervous?" I whispered. I could feel her nod her head. I kissed her hair gently and suggested that we didn't have to do this if she was scared.

She pushed away from me almost violently. "No," she scowled. "I've waited for this night for years - and this last day of waiting has almost killed me. I want this to happen more than anything."

With that statement, she started fumbling with the button at the side of her skirt.

I gently took her hands away from her waistband, then I lifted the hem of her t-shirt. Annie bit her lower lip nervously, but lifted her arms as I pulled the shirt over her head, exposing a shiny, pale pink metallic-fleck bra. It had a front clasp that I fumbled with briefly. When it fell aside I was blessed with the vision of Annie's small breasts, barely the size of peach halves, each capped with very pale, small nipples. In a relaxed state they may have been the size of nickels, but they were hard right then, very hard, and pulled up into nubs like little cherry pits.

Resisting the urge to immediately suck those delightful buttons into my mouth, I concentrated instead on the button and zipper at the side of her skirt. It fell away exposing the thong which matched the bra. I pulled her to me, her warm skin under my hands which almost automatically reached to her buttocks. Taking one cheek of her little round bottom in each hand, I kissed her deeply, feeling her hard nipples pressing into my chest with only the thin layer of my silk robe between us. I was sure she felt the erection that was throbbing against her belly, and soon she reached between and tentatively grasped at it.

Breaking our kiss, I slipped the thumbs of both hands under the thong and eased it down over her hips. Annie giggled as the string of it stuck momentarily before it popped free from between her cheeks. Bending down as I lowered the tiny garment, I could see it was soaked at the crotch. The heady, heavenly aroma of her arousal greeted my nostrils. Soon the thong was down to her ankles and she stepped free of it just as I got my first view of the thatch of fine reddish-golden curls covering her mound. I kissed her flat belly just above the curls, then stood up again.

I led her to the bed and she kicked off her sandals and lay down on her side to watch me. When I dropped my robe from my shoulders, she looked nervously at the erection jutting from my loins. "It's bigger than my vibrator" she says in awe. I'm not huge, but I'm sure that, to her inexperienced eyes, a real penis in full erection was very imposing.

I lay next to her. On our sides we held each other and kissed deeply, then I rolled her onto her back, slipping between her thighs, supporting my weight on my elbows. I slid down slightly and started feasting on her nipples.