Song and Emotion

[Author's note: This was written while the piano-only version of Sarah McLachlan's "Possession" played on repeat. I suggest listening to this song while reading this if you'd like to get the "mood" that I had while writing it. It is truly an amazing and passionate song.]

...imagine, if you will, our first moment of touch. Imagine only the music and Sarah McLachlan's haunting voice, and with that, see what I see, feel what I feel...

For so long, there have been so many miles between us, so many hours in the dark with only words or the occasional voice on the phone as our means of communication. These were the memories we had created together: days and weeks had come and gone and every moment we could spend together, there we were, the night our companion, our solitude the guide that led us away from that lonely wilderness to this moment, this instant, where we would forever put away the solitude and the nights of imagined touch...at this moment, our love would be satisfied.

I see you come into the room and a smile lights up my face as I see you -- really, truly see you, alive and warm and breathing, here in the same room with me.

For a moment all I can do is stare.

As I let my eyes take in your beautiful form, the only thought that goes through my mind is that you are achingly beautiful, so beautiful to me that it makes my heart ache with longing and deepest desire. Through the soft glow from the candles I have placed all over the room, bathing everything in suffuse, flickering light...you see me. Our eyes meet, the moment of recognition hits us both like being struck by lightning...and we're moving together, almost running until you hop up into my welcoming arms...and I finally feel your arms around my neck, the rounded curves of your bottom in my hands holding you to me, your legs around my thighs...and I feel the salty wetness of tears from us both as you rain your sweet butterfly kisses all over my face...my feet already moving us around and around, making slow circles around the room until I feel the touch of the mattress on the backs of my legs...and holding you tightly, tightly to me, my precious only love, I fall backwards onto the soft waiting cushion of the bed until I look up into the cascade of your lustrous, perfect curls. For a moment -- for a moment, love -- I am lost in the wonder that is you.

In the next heartbeat, you are pushing your body against mine, holding me down as your mouth descends on mine, and we share that first, hot kiss, fueled by such love and nights of needing each other close while we were far apart.

This kiss is not gentle.

No, this is a kiss that has been denied for far, far too long, and it crashes into us like a storm assaulting the shore -- terrible in its intensity, searing in its heat, and perfection in its expression of love.

Both our faces shine in the candle-glow with the tears of release and joy that we have both cried, but there is nothing else in the world but our kiss...that ends only when we breathlessly pull ourselves apart, only enough to breathe. And for a few moments, all we can do is wordlessly watch each other try to catch the breath that our kiss has taken away.

Thoughts race through our minds, silent acknowledgement of the past -- the pain, betrayal and loss we'd both endured, the lies we'd been told...all of those things are washed away in that moment by the onrushing wave of emotions that suddenly flood us with the memories of how we were brought together, each one of us finding within the other the completion and the true love we had sought for so long. It was more than amazing; it was our own modern-day miracle.

Then even thought is overwhelmed and cast asunder by the joy of discovering each other in the flesh.

Our hands move desperately, fingers working buttons then casting away our now-useless clothes like any other barrier that would have denied us our life together. What follows are blurry moments of frenzied undressing, uncaring that we tear each other clothes in the mad rush to feel each other naked --to feel our bodies pressed together, skin on skin -- until at last we are gloriously naked before each other. For a moment our eyes roam over the other, seeing our objects of desire for the first time. But this only lasts for a moment, for in the next we are pressed together, rolling one on top of the other, hands and fingers touching and caressing and touching and feeling, bodies smashed against each other in a desperate attempt to be the one being we really are.

Finally, we find ourselves in just the right spot...you lay upon the mattress, your thighs around my waist as we both reach down to take possession of my cock, solid and burning hot to the touch. You guide me to your treasures, the soft folds of your sex, glistening with the wetness of your essence and I press the head of my cock against your clit, our hands working in symphony, pressing, pulling, tugging, stroking until I push myself down, parting your folds with the swollen head. I gasp out loud as I feel the heat pouring from within you. You're so hot, baby, you're hot like a furnace and I crave your searing, clutching embrace...it takes only a heartbeat for our eyes to lock together as I find your hands with mine then hold them down on either side of you as I raise up with my thighs...

...and then in the next instant I am sliding home, finally home, inside of you. We both scream as the sensation threatens to take away our sanity. There are no words to describe the feeling of being inside you, your incredible wetness allows me entrance but your tight clutching embrace would keep me out if not for the force I pour into our first, joining thrust. An eternity later our bodies collide with the slap of wet skin hitting wet skin and we are one, joined, finally, one being, one soul and one breath between us.

All pretense of thought or restraint is swallowed by our desire, our need, our craving for each other, to drive each other beyond the limits of endurance. Swamped by love, emotion and sensation, we begin to move, I rocking back with my hips with your legs clamped around me our mouths come together in a searing kiss that -- intense though it is -- pales in comparison to the relentless onslaught we force our bodies through. We pull apart, my cock sliding from inside you and the cool air of the room feels frigid, icy compared to the molten heat of your grasping walls. I barely make it back far enough to feel your lips caress the back of my cockhead, only to plunge back into you with a wild, powerful thrust. Again our bodies collide and seemingly bounce apart. In this way we find our perfect rhythm without even trying, and to that rhythm we move, I pummeling your tender clutching pussy with my bone-hard cock, you squeezing and milking my cock each time I am inside you, holding me in only to release me at just the right instant.

Ah, my god, we tear into each other with almost furious motion...I hear your voice crying out, rising up, exultantly screaming my name as you cum, the terrible force of your orgasm taking us both by surprise, your body convulses and your walls squeeze me, your muscles clamping down hard, trapping me within you as I feel the flood of your scalding essence forced through the seal you have around my shaft and I feel the waterfall wash over the base of my cock and all over my balls. With a crazed, primal growl, I grab your claves and lean into you, my chest pressing against your thighs and your ankles dangling over my shoulders. And then, folding you in half with my body I begin to drive my cock deep and hard inside you. Your screams tell me that you are as completely filled as I am perfectly held inside – and your words are fulfilled -- we are a perfect fit for each other, as though our bodies were made to fit together like this.

I whip my hips into a frenzy of motion, raring back and power-stroking back home, determined to drive us both over that edge again...I don't know how many times you scream because I'm screaming, too. You move like a woman possessed, wild and uncontrolled, thrashing all over the bed as each new orgasm slams into you with hurricane force. Suddenly, I feel that moment when there is no turning back, and screaming your name, I plunge down inside you with the hardest body-pounding thrust yet. Once there, my whole body locks up and a scream tears its way out of my very soul to echo off the walls as I am undone. I erupt inside you with heavy spurts geysering into your body as I give to you everything that I am. My body is wracked with a convulsion each time my cock spurts out a scalding offering of cum, flooding your still-spasming pussy...

...and then you are holding me, having caught me when I collapsed. We lay side by side, lightly kissing each other, our fingers moving slowly, almost reverently on each others bodies as we bask together in the afterglow of the desperate expression of our love.

When at last we can both breathe again, I find your ear with my lips as you find mine with yours, and at the same moment, we whisper to each other, "I love you."

With somewhat surprised expressions, we pull away to look at ourselves, both of us laughing at our simultaneous words before we wrap our arms tightly around each other, neither of us wanting to ever let go.