Sorry

"How long will that be?"

"My best guess would be about five to six hours. Why don't you relax in the waiting room? The cafeteria is open if you're interested."

Kenny looked at the doctor and then at Holly, he knew she wasn't going anywhere.

I was back in our apartment. Holly was there fixing us dinner, telling me about something funny she'd heard at work. I was sitting at the kitchen table with a half full Corona in front of me just watching her. Everything was blurry. Nothing was in focus except Holly and me. Was I dead? Was this some kind of dream? Did the last three days really happen? I looked at my right arm, it was no longer broken, and surprisingly it showed no sign that it had ever been.

I listened to her go on and on. Even though she wasn't perfect, I loved that woman with all my heart. I was going to tell her just how much but when I opened my mouth nothing came out. I couldn't talk. I tried to stand, my legs wouldn't work and when I tried to push myself up by my hands, they wouldn't function either. Holly just kept going on and on smiling and laughing as I started thrashing about, finally falling onto my back on the kitchen floor. My heart beat wildly.

"Not again!" went through my mind.

"Steve, what's the matter?" Holly asked, but I couldn't reply. I knew what I wanted to say, only I couldn't talk. The only thing I could do was let my eyes talk to her.

"Don't try to talk. You just came out of surgery and your throat is going to be pretty sore for a couple of days. You need rest, we can talk later." She smiled. I was alive. Then I faded away again. This going in and out of consciousness was getting to be a real drag. At least there were no nasty, flesh-eating insects to contend with this time around.

The next time I woke up it was dark. For a split second I got worried I was back in my car, the lights in the hall put my mind at ease. A cast on my right arm and a brace on my left shoulder told me I wasn't getting out of here just yet. I had some discomfort, especially when I tried to sit up, but it was nothing like I'd experienced over the last three days.

Twenty minutes later a nurse came in to check my vitals and give me a pill.

"Can you tell me what time it is?"

"It's just after three in the morning. If you're wondering, your wife left around eleven thirty. I told her to go home and get some sleep and I'd take good care of you. She was looking a little frayed around the edges. It wasn't going to do either of you any good in the condition she was in. She is more than a little afraid you're still angry with her about something. She just kept telling you over and over again how sorry she was. Whatever she did, I think I'd let her off the hook, at least for now." The nurse smiled and told me to get some rest because I'd probably have lots of visitors in the morning. I didn't have much of a chance to even respond before my eyelids became heavy, and I was again looking at my wife's face on the inside.

The first twenty-four hours after they pulled my ass out of my car, I slept probably twenty of them. I ate some, and between the I.V. in my arm and the liquids I drank, my body was recovering nicely. I must have peed a gallon that first time.

The doctor told me I would be out of commission for probably six weeks and would need physical therapy after that. My boss was great about it. He told me not to worry about my job, to just get well. I would be on disability after my ten sick days and two weeks of vacation ran out. Financially we'd just make it.

Throughout the day I had more than my share of well-wishing visitors. Holly was there with smiles and kisses, tons and tons of kisses. Even though she put up a good front her eyes told a different story. I was glad to see the last of my visitors leave. Holly and I needed some time alone.

It was close to seven o'clock. Dinner was over, what there was of it, my parents had left and for once we were alone. My night nurse came in, and after checking my vitals, put a pill down on the table next to my bed.

"Take this if and when your wife leaves," she smiled, looking over at Holly. Bending down she again whispered, "Remember what I told you." With that said and with a smile she was gone.

Holly was sitting on the edge of my bed and looked like she wanted to say something but was struggling with herself. I did what I was asked to do.

"I'm sorry I got angry about the boots, it was a dumb thing to argue about," I said breaking the ice. "If you still want them...." is all I got out before the dam opened up and the tears started flowing.

She was sitting in the chair, which she had pulled up so close it was touching my bed. She pressed her face against mine, crying and saying something I couldn't understand. Even when she finally sat up she still couldn't get it out of her.

"Holly, I love you. This isn't the first disagreement or fight we have had, or the last we will ever have, but I can guarantee you this: next time I'm not walking out." She kept on crying. I held her, stroked her hair with the cast on my one good arm, and decided to wait until she was done.

"You could have died! I don't know what I would have done without you! You can't imagine how I felt when you didn't come back, and over the next couple of days I don't think I slept a wink. I don't know what I would have done if you'd died—it would have been my fault."

"Holly, the accident wasn't your fault or mine. The guy that hit me was probably drunk and maybe still doesn't even remember hitting me. All I know is that I am lucky to have survived and lucky to still have you." We took another break as the floodgates opened up once again.

We talked until almost eleven. There was no way she was leaving, and as much as I would have liked her in bed with me, that wasn't happening. I took the pill. She slept in the recliner chair next to my bed with her hand nesting in mine. We were together again.

The next six weeks, especially the first two, were tough. Holly was back at work and through my insurance I got a day nurse. Do you have any idea how embarrassing it is to have someone wipe your butt? Having Holly do it was one thing, but a guy day nurse? Well, I was praying from day one to heal fast and send him packing.

My list of injuries: a concussion, two cracked ribs, a compound fracture of my right arm, and a couple of hairline fractures on my left shoulder—and yes, it was dislocated—numerous cuts, scrapes, and bruises, and a million insect bites on my head and neck.

The first couple of days I thought I'd go nuts they itched so badly, even with the lotion they put on. Holly would rub them but refused to scratch them.

She took a million pictures, saying the next time we argued we could look at them and thank God we were given another chance.

The next big problem came when I had to settle up with my auto insurance company. They were giving me only market value, not replacement value, on my car. The bastards, you never win with them. I finally found another used car we could afford without breaking the bank. After test driving it, I took my right elbow and attempted to release the seat belt, it had an innie release button.

"Look, I like the car, but I need you to either replace that release button or attached something to the top of it so I can use my elbow to open it."

"But honey, isn't your right hand healed up enough that you can use your fingers again?" my wife questioned me, not understanding why I was making such a big deal out of this.

No one could understand unless they'd gone through what I had. I was going to make damn sure that I could open up that seatbelt without using my fingers. There was no way in hell I would be a bug's dinner ever again, not if I could help it. And, there was no way I was ever again going to be left helpless and hanging, not in this lifetime.

And those damn eighty-dollar boots? Well, they were gone when I got home. I thought about asking Holly about them a number of times, but what's that saying, 'Let sleeping dogs lie?' Now when we go to the mall and we pass by a shoe store Holly holds my hand a little tighter and picks up her pace.

Is she cured? Not a chance. One of these days she'll bring home something again and ask if she can keep it. Hopefully, it'll be our baby because with the amount of unprotected sex we'd had over the last couple of months it was just a matter of time she was put in the motherly way. I only hope it's not a girl. I don't think I could live in the same house with two shopaholics.