Spending Time with Grandmother

"Yes, sometimes. Claudia tried to help me; she sometimes used a strap on dildo, but it was just a piece of vibrating plastic, and it's no substitute for the real thing."

"You know Ethan, Claudia taught me so much about love and the beauty of sex, so I have no real reason to complain. She made sex so exciting because you were never sure when it was going happen."

"There was never any 'Let's go to bed and make love.' In a sense you could say we made love much of the time. We were always stroking and touching each other and sometimes it would lead to the full thing...you know orgasms, and at other times we were just content to caress and explore each other, but it was never hurried. She used to say we should enjoy the journey as much as the arrival. "

Sally smiled sadly and went on, "Claudia was not much interest in vaginal penetration, but when she did want it, it was my fingers she wanted in her." Sally smiled again and added, "She even told me once that my long fingers were the first thing she fell in love with."

"Of course she was really the masculine aspect of our relationship and I was the feminine. She dug out and lined the swimming pool and built the summer house. She was always making or repairing things.

"The tools!" Ethan exclaimed.

"Yes they were her tools. She kept chickens and looked after the vegetable patches while I looked after the flower beds. After she died I didn't seem to have the motivation to pick up her jobs, and so...well, you've probably noticed."

"What happened to grandfather?"

"After he divorced me he went overseas. I believe he died there but I'm not sure; he was a lot older than me."

"You know Ethan, when I learned that your parents had been killed, I saw it as a chance to have someone in my life, some blood relative. I've told you about myself and what happened and I'm glad I have because I think you and I could get very fond of each other, but if you were going to reject me, then its better now than later when the pain would only be worse."

She fell silent and was clearly expecting a response from Ethan.

For a while he looked down at the floor, as if deep in thought, and then raising his head and looking at Sally he said, "Of course these day's people aren't so prejudiced against gay relationships the way they once were."

Sally smiled sadly and said, "Wrong timing."

Ethan shrugged and said, "If it's done in love, then it's never the wrong time for those involved."

Those who had known Ethan might have been surprised at this insight. His sexual relationships had been lust rather than love based. He had even surprised himself.

"I think you were quite right," he continued, "I believe we could get very fond of each other, but it's difficult."

Sally looked puzzled, even a little hurt. "Why is it difficult Ethan?" she asked.

"It's...it's just that...that not knowing you...only knowing you existed, and seeing you now, it's hard to relate to you as my grandmother." He did not add that her asking him to call her Sally and that her sheer appearance militated against a grandmotherly image.

Sally looked relieved and said, "Well let's not try to force the grandson-grandmother relationship, let's just work on becoming good friends."

"You mean, let's get to know each other and see how it turns out?"

"That is just what I mean, Ethan."

* * * * * * * *

Over the following fortnight they ran, walked and swam together. Ethan even got fitter and could manage to run all the way to the headland, although he could still only make it running to about halfway back.

Sally showed him the bays and inlets along the coast; they walked over the tracks in the nearby hills, and sometimes Sally would sit painting the scene while Ethan watched her, or rambled off by him self.

He seemed to settle into life with Sally, even getting used to eating porridge and drinking water. Herbal tea he continued to renounce and he only just managed to accept the decaffeinated coffee (wasn't coffee from a plant as well?).

Their decision to not deliberately strive for a grandson-grandmother relationship had both a positive and a negative effect on him.

Positively it freed him to look at her as he would any other woman, that is, as a sexual being with always the possibility of a sexual relationship occurring.

Negatively, and in this he surprised himself, he started to feel the need for a long term relationship with Sally, and this had never been his intention in any of his past sexual relationships.

Together with this was the plain fact, that despite their intention to keep their relationship at the level of friendship, they were blood related.

In the past what had passed for friendship with a female had invariably involved sex, and Ethan found that once sexual intercourse had taken place a few times, his feelings of friendship for the girl or woman quickly faded, and he was ready to pass on the next relationship.

He had never been, as he saw it, trapped by a female, but now, with Sally, he began to sense that the tender trap of love was closing in around him. For one who had never experienced love in this way it was both exciting and frightening.

Several times he decided to end his visit with Sally, but he only had to be in her presence again to have the decision dissolve into nothingness.

Sally made it no easier partly because of whom she was, a rather lovely person, but also because she dressed in such a liberated way she often had Ethan in a state of sexual frustration.

They had overcome their earlier inhibitions about physically touching , but her embrace and kiss, was not only pleasurable to Ethan, but added to his sexual feelings for her.

Ethan, as he put it to himself, was unable to "read" Sally. In the past he seemed to know instinctively if a female was attracted to him sexually, and again, in his words, was ready to "come across." If he did not get these signals he simply passed on to someone more responsive.

He felt he was getting mixed signals from Sally but when it came to the point, he was not willing to pass on.

As those who have experienced such a situation and feelings will know, it is not possible to go on in such an ambivalent atmosphere -- eventually something has to give way, and give way it did.

* * * * * * * *

One day just over a fortnight into his stay with Sally and after lunch, Sally said, "Shall we use the swimming pool and summer house this afternoon?"

Ethan had wondered why they had not used the pool before this. Sally kept it clean, and Ethan had learned to use the greedy little machine that gobbled up swimming pool detritus.

Unknowingly Sally answered his question about the pool's usage.

"The pool and summer house were so much part of Claudia; she built them and after she died they seemed to still hold her. Every time I went to use them I cried, and in the end I couldn't use them."

She smiled self-deprecatingly. "I suppose they became a shrine to her memory, but somehow I feel free to use them now."

"You can't mourn of ever," Ethan said, "not if you're a normally healthy person."

"No," Sally said, and then seeming to shake off her dark mood said, "Anyway it's a hot day and it would be too uncomfortable on the beach and the summer house is shady."

They went to their rooms to change, and since they were going to be completely private Ethan wore only his swimming shorts.

He arrived at the pool before Sally, and he notice she'd put two air mattresses on the floor of he summer house. He sat at the edge of the pool dangling is feet in the water, waiting for Sally.

He heard her arrive. She dropped two towels in the summer house and came to sit beside him.

He glanced at her and smiled, and then the smile faded. Sally was wearing only a thong that resembled a minute G-string and bras that barely covered her nipples. As Ethan saw it, she might as well not have worn anything.

The emotional effect on him was devastating. If on previous occasions she had aroused him, this time he felt it to be almost beyond endurance. He almost hated her for arousing him in this way, and as the head of his penis threatened to emerge out of the top of his swimming shorts he flung himself into the water.

Sally followed and would have played with him, but he kept avoiding her. He knew now he had to leave Dolphin Heads and Long House, for if he didn't his frustration would eventually explode and there would be a second rift in his family life experience. No, better to stick to letters, emails and perhaps telephone conversations.

* * * * * * * *

He got out of the pool before Sally and went into the summer house. After drying himself he lay down on one of the mattresses, determined that this was the time he would tell Sally he was leaving.

He lay face down so that Sally would not see his erection, and when she entered the summer house he kept his eyes away from her, knowing that looking at her would only arouse him further.

Women had aroused him before, but never like this. It was ridiculous -- a woman who must be thirty...no perhaps forty years his senior, and he was like a virgin youth aware of a female body for the first time.

She finished drying her self and he felt rather than saw her lay on the other mattress beside him. She was very close. He was in turmoil, his penis throbbing, his testes protesting, demanding an outlet for their burden.

He felt her hand touch his shoulder and she said almost in a whisper, "Ethan darling."

"What?" he said in muffled voice, not daring to look at her.

"Isn't it time for us to speak the truth to each other?"

"We have...we have..." he said, a sharp edge of anger in his voice, anger less focused now on her, but more on himself for being unable to master the powerful emotions that racked him.

Still speaking very softly Sally said, "No darling, we've talked about the past, or at least I have, but I mean, we need to talk about the present, about the here and now, you and I."

"What is there to say?" Ethan replied, his voice hoarse with emotion.

"Look at me Ethan," Sally said, her voice taking on a peremptory note.

Ethan did not move; he didn't dare look, fearing what seeing her would do to him.

Sally spoke again more firmly, "Look-at-me-Ethan."

This time he turned his head towards her. Her face was very near to his and with a sharp intake of his breath he saw that she had removed her minuscule bras, her breasts were naked.

"We must have the courage to face the truth, Ethan," Sally said, her voice once more a whisper.

"What truth?"

"I think you know Ethan, in fact I can see you know, so must I say it, put it in simple terms?"

"If you have something to say, Sally, then say it and let's have done with it," Ethan snapped.

"Very well; you love me, you want me, and you have wanted me from soon after you arrived here. You've tortured yourself trying to hide what you've felt and are feeling, but you can't hide it from me, and it's so foolish to go on trying to hide it."

"Why foolish?" Ethan said, rather taken aback that she had summed up so clearly how he felt about her.

Sally's hand touched his penis; "Foolish because you can't really hide this. I've seen it like this so many times and wondered why you made no move to make love with me."

"Be-because you...you...you're my..."

"Grandmother? Yes, but we met virtually as strangers and we've agreed we would seek friendship and not blood relationship. I waited for you to approach me, but today I knew I must approach you."

"You mean...mean you want me to...to..."

"Darling, I told you that this place had become a sort of shrine to Claudia, it took some courage for me to suggest that we use the pool and this summer house."

"Then why did you suggest it?"

"Because I had to know, Ethan."

"Know what?"

"If the time had come to let Claudia go."

"And have you?"

"Yes, I know that the time has come to go forward in my life, I can let the past go, and I might as well tell you, I want it to go forward with you. Oh, I know about the age difference; I may only have you for a short time, but for as long as you want me I'll be here for you."

Sally hand had remained on his penis and she began to slowly massage it.

Ethan finally spoke the words he had held back, "I love you Sally."

"I know my darling, and we should confirm our love."

She ceased massaging his penis and drawing down his swimming shorts she threw them aside and then quickly sat astride him.

Ethan could see that she had removed her thong, and fascinated he watched her naked cleft descend on to his penis. He saw his length slowly enter her and felt the welcoming warmth of her wet tunnel as she seemed to suck his manhood into her.

She knew that Ethan had already almost reached the point of no return, and smiling down at him she said, "This one is all for you darling, don't try and hold back, just let it go, put it all in me."

Ethan couldn't have held back however much he wanted to. His need was too urgent and it was made more urgent by a sense that this was truly an act of love.

Sally was moving in an upward and downward movement that seemed to be combined with a slight roiling motion.

Above him she spoke --almost sang -- "Let it go my love...let it go..."

His body obeyed; his testes released their burden and sperm spurted out of his urethra. He had never experienced such a powerful ejaculation before, and as Sally felt his semen hammering into her, her refrained changed.

"Yes darling yes....yes...let it all go...in me my love..."

With a long drawn out sigh Ethan finished.

Sally leaned forward until her breasts touched his chest and began to press moist kisses over his face.

Ethan's hands closed over her breasts, feeling their firmness and warmth.

"You're so beautiful Sally," he murmured.

Sally felt the threat of tears. "If only I could have met him when I was young," she thought, "there might have been no Michael or Claudia, no years of family separation, no..." But what was the use, the past could not be recalled, the years couldn't be peeled away like the skin of a banana or the layers of an onion.

"Let him see me as beautiful," she thought, "and I'll enjoy what I can."

As if he had heard her thoughts Ethan's penis was hardening again. She continued to lay over him, this time flicking her vagina over his length with short sharp movements of her hips.

Before he was ready to come again she felt the first warning signs of her approaching orgasm. The first little tingling shocks rapidly becoming tremors that seemed to posses her whole body.

Ethan felt her approaching orgasm as her movements became more rapid. He thrust upward against her downward movements but he was puzzled when the full force of her climax struck.

He was accustomed to screamers and groaners, who lost in their own pleasure and pain, seemed to be disassociated from him.

Sally did not scream and although her eyes were shut her gentle cries indicated she was still with him.

"Oh darling...beautiful...beautiful...I love you...I love you...oh...oh...I need you...oh...oh...ooohaaa..."

Over the peak Sally moved more slowly and her cries took on a crooning sound, "Mmm...mmmah....mmm...mmmah..."

It was during the final stages of Sally's orgasm that Ethan came. Feeling it approaching Sally speeded up her movement again but with longer strokes. Feeling him about to ejaculate she thrust down hard on him to take the first ejection deep into her.

Ethan's hands were on her hips forcing her on to him even more deeply. He had the strange sensation that they were one -- one body being finally fulfilled. With each new expulsion of semen he moaned, "I love you...I love you..."

* * * * * * * *

As Sally felt his sperm entering her she thought, "What a pity he can't make me pregnant." But she knew that it was one of the many things she would not be able to have with him. She consoled herself with the thought that she could at least give him her love and body.

She felt that his love was confirmed when after they were both relaxed and at peace, Ethan did not attempt to withdraw his penis from her.

Even Michael though he stayed with her until her orgasm was complete, had withdrawn once it was over. With Claudia the moment of separation had been less well defined.

She drew his lips to hers and deep kissing him she slowly explored his mouth with her tongue. His hands were on her breasts, caressing them, his fingers oh so gently pressing her nipples.

When finally they separated it was to have him sucking her nipples as she tenderly held his head to her wishing she had mothers milk to feed him with -- something else that could never be.

They dozed for a while and then retired to the bathroom where they used the bubbling spa bath that was like a small swimming pool. There, as Sally held on to the rail that ran round the bath, Ethan, standing in front of her, put his hands under her buttocks, and raised up her sweet cleft to his mouth and began to suck and lick her.

When his tongue found her clitoris she promised her self the pleasure of sucking his penis and feeling his cum burst into her mouth, something she had not experienced since Michael, but that could come later.

Again he brought her to orgasm and her soft cries were mingled with tears of joy.

When inviting him to visit her there had been no thought of this sort of love. Love with Claudia had been beautiful, but this...?

Later that day, after Sally had finished giving Ethan fellatio and she had washed out her mouth, on returning to bed Ethan was asleep.

Looking at him Sally wondered about her sexual orientation. She had spent twenty years with Claudia and they had been wonderful years; would she at some time need another Claudia? For as long as Ethan was with her and needed her, she thought not.

How long would their sexual love last? What would it become when it was over? Her looks and physique had served her well, but she was not so foolish as to believe that they would last like that for ever.

She shrugged mentally, "Take what life gives you," she thought.

She smiled and kissed Ethan softly on his forehead, then turned off the bed light.

She lay down with the thought, "Perhaps he will want to make love with me in the morning."

She smiled again and murmured, "And I shall be ready for him."

She pressed close to Ethan and slept.