Stepping Out

This is an intentional slow burn type story, so it gets off to a slow start. I have a direction for this story and it doesn't lend it's self to a quick resolution. More a emotionally charged one. Please let me know what you think. Thanks for reading and letting me write for you.

Martin

*

"Hey baby, It's me."

"I know," she said, her words short and clipped. "They came out with caller ID a few years ago."

Her words cutdeep. In a way it made lying easier, even so, I let dead air hang for a for a second."Well, Roger just dropped a case onto my desk, so I'll likely be here until about 10, maybe 11."

"Huge surprise there." You could feel the indifference in her voice. "Well, Jeanne and I were planning on doing wine and a movie anyhow, so, yeah, guess I'll see ya." The line went dead. Kind of like our marriage.

Ten years ago we had the marriage that everyone else compared theirs to and found themselves wanting. College sweethearts, we'd managed to stay together through my Law school, and her PhD. She stayed beautiful and I kept in shape pretty well myself with daily gym trips and clean eating. We took long vacations to interesting locales and visited our wide ranging group of friends as much as we could. Everything was idyllic.

Then life happened. I had been working at a small law firm doing mostly contract work, waiver writing, and similar "Small time" type stuff. I found I had a knack for it. Well, after a large company couldn't weasel their way out from one of the contracts I'd written for some small company we represented, they'd poached me away and into the law firm that they owned. Next thing I knew, I was making money far in excess of what I'd ever expected, writing contract for multinational corporations and dealing in millions instead of thousands of dollar contracts.

Dana, to her credit, never gave up on her dream. She worked as an administrator at a local hospital. She'd worked her way through school as a nurse and brought her practical mentality and can do attitude into the corporate world of hospital administration. She spoke nurse, and in turn translated Suit into Nurse. It worked well, and she was well sought after first as a consultant, and ultimately as director of nursing for a large city hospital.

These days she spent much of her days traveling through the city, meeting with staff from the hospitals many clinics or meetings at the hospital, and I slaved away at my office or less often in court.

Things changed one night at a time. We used to have sex every couple days. Her lean runner's legs called to me as she walked from the shower, and I just had to get my hands on them. Slowly, that became weekly, then monthly. Then...

Then I started to die inside. I gained some weight and started working longer hours, just so I wouldn't have to go home to the house that love forgot. She stayed beautiful, but that only made worse the feeling that I felt I failed her. So, I was left with the idea that my work was the only place I was excelling. That worked for a time. Last year I asked her to come with me on a vacation to Tahiti. She seemed hesitant, but agreed. Right at the last minute, a client called and I had to work. She said it was fine that we had to cancel, but that drove another wedge between us.

One day, 6 months ago, there was a fire at our office. Seems a local environmental activist group got the idea that the logging company we represented would be harmed by burning down our building. I had to run down eight flights of stairs. I had to rest twice. I was so scared I was going to die that I made a pact that if I got out of there I would get in better shape. I lost 60 pounds in a four months and got in the best shape of my life at 45. It was invigorating. Dana only wanted to know what her name was because Redbook said the only reason a guy diets after 35 is for another woman.

That burnt inside. I started thinking that I should start looking else where. We were married before I knew what the word pre-nup meant, so if we divorced I was out a lot of money. I was starting to get better at delegating and had hired a couple of very bright junior attorneys that I'd taught many (but not all) of my tricks to and they were handling more of my case load than ever. Dana didn't know that, so I felt that if I kept things the same, she'd never know.

My buddy Amir knew exactly what I was going through, having been through wife two and affair number four. He screwed the first marriage up, but with this one, he was more careful. He suggested I use some site called LocalNSA.com. I asked him what the NSA had to do with things, but he said it stood for No Strings Attached. Apparently there were a bunch of married folks there who would all be generally more discrete than singles could be. So I made a profile. I did lie a bit, saying I was a business guy, being that I knew a fair bit of business terminology, and I didn't want anyone to know what I really did. There weren't too many bad-ass contract lawyers out there, and I didn't want to get found out or identified.

Disappointed with my exchange with my wife, I grabbed a soda from the break room fridge and walked slowly back to my office. My assistant Jon was gone for the day, but I still locked the door. I cracked my soda and logged onto the site. Once logged on, I looked through the profiles there and a couple struck me as worth my time. The first was a lady from downtown that claimed to be a book store owner in her late 30's. She had long brunette hair and was careful not to show her face, a common thing on here, and something I did on my own profile. She had a shapely figure, something I like quite a bit, and a wide variety of lingerie judging by the many pictures on her profile. I clicked, "Wink", something that apparently lets the user know you are interested.

The next user I liked was an early 40's barista from the city. She was wearing a shoulder length wig, and had pierced nipples, and also never showed her face. She was leaner than the other, something I liked in my younger days, and really seemed to be looking for fun, judging by some of her responses to the canned questions from the site. This was a little intimidating. I wasn't exactly adrenaline junkie. More like an office monkey. I clicked "Wink" just the same, if only because she was the appropriate age, and I think part of me really liked the wig.

Immediately, she winked back. I then noticed there was an Eyeball icon that apparently indicated the person was online. I felt a chill of exhilaration. It took me a few seconds to figure it out, but I opened a chat window.

"Hiya!" I typed

"Hello, how are you tonight?" she replied.

This was so sophomoric. "I'm well... This feels silly" I decided to be honest.

"Ha ha." she typed. Then she added, "What feels silly?"

"I feel like I'm chatting on a bulletin board like I did when I was 16 and lonely."

"I know, me too. Except now I'm 40something and lonely."

It was comforting to think that at least she was feeling something like I was.

"I'm honestly not sure how this is supposed to work." I typed. "First night on, honestly."

"Well, It's just like when we were 16, but now we're older, smarter, and our internet connection is better."

'Oh, She's funny,' I thought. "I'll make you a solemn promise, no dick pics unless SPECIFICALLY requested. I've read that it's totally last year."

"Ha! About.com can have some good info on online dating." she typed.

I laughed out loud and took a sip of cola. "So, you are a barista?"

"Yup. Bet I can guess your drink in three questions."

Ha. I was a difficult order. This should be good. "Ok, shoot."

"Ok, first question, dieting or not?"

"Kind of tricky way to see if I'm fat or not..."

"Unless you didn't use a pic of yourself, or a pick from high-school, I'm already interested in the body."

Shit, I didn't think of that. "Got me. Not dieting, but watching what goes in my mouth."

"Ok, second question: Chocolate cake or Fruit pie."

"Hmm.. Cherry cheese cake count?" I'd recently found a place near by that made a wonderful one, and it had became how I treated my self when I felt I'd earned it, even though I was being careful with what I ate.

"Last question: Here or to go?"

"Togo."

"This is easy. Like reading the mind of a child...."

"Ouch," I typed. "And we've only met."

"Well, here's your order, and I'll tell you why..."

"Shoot."

"Triple,Venti Americano with sugar free amaretto and extra half and half."

Damn she was good. I was normally a coconut milk guy, but the rest was spot on.

"Ok, Sherlock Barista, do tell why you guessed that."

"Well, to go means two things, one you won't be coming back, so triple Venti for the extra caffene. And americano is faster than the cappuccino that was my other option. As for the flavor, I find it to be the favorite of folks who want fancy-ish and don't want a mocha."

"And the half and half?"

"You want the richness of a latte, but not the carbs."

This gal WAS good.

"Coconut milk, but only because I've been recently diagnosed with lactose intolerance. Very impressive."

"Told you I was good."

"That's something I'll have to find out later. We're a little soon in our relationship."

"Ha! Nice. Forward, I like it. Most guys are scared off by me and how I operate."

We talked for 4 hours. We skated around personal topics like skilled politicians. Instead, we talked about music likes and dislikes, movies in general and even a little about the local sports scene. This girl was everything I wasn't. She was into roller derby and soccer, where I'd never seen a derby match and preferred baseball, admittedly because I could get work done during lulls in the action.

I was into action movies, but I'd taken a recent interest in foreign drama films because Foreign audiences seemed to have a more mature taste, and as such had much deeper films made for them. She had seen many of the plays available locally, something I had never done, and even filled me in on about the local drag-show scene as well as the burlesque dinner joint downtown. I couldn't imagine myself, re-invented as I was, going into someplace like that in my suit and tie.

I asked her about her pierced nipples, and she asked me about my six-pack. I didn't go all the way into it, but I said I had a health scare, which was half true, and re-invented myself. She said she had a mid life crisis and got pierced with a girl friend. She said they were fun to play with and I told her they looked sexy. She said she was thinking about getting a sleeve tattoo, but wasn't sure. It was a lot of money, and she wasn't sure she could do the pain thing. I reminded her that One: she was a woman and could likely take it better than I could, and Two: she got her nipples pierced. She laughed and said she thought I was funny.

Ultimately, I had to go. We finished up by agreeing to talk the next night. Neither of us wanted to go, but both agreed we needed to. I was falling asleep at my keyboard, and decided I'd just crash at the office. I was a junior level partner, and had a recliner, a shower, extra clothes, and stuff, so it had been something that happened not often, but often enough.

Morning came, and I texted Dana.

"Hey, slept at the office, Jon just woke me up. Sorry I didn't call."

"k"

Man, it was like she didn't even care. It made the ache to talk to Jane (the name the barista gave me last night) even more.

Meetings, Skype conferences, webinars. It all drug on me today. I was distracted. I just dismissed folks concern by saying I was having issues with Dana. Family issues in a high powered attorney's office was super common, so everyone left me to myself.

I'd found the phone APP for the website, so I downloaded it. I realized that I needed to go home, at least to get yelled at, so I packed up my brief case full of, ironically, legal briefs and headed home.

I started the car and immediately felt guilty. I was headed home eagerly to cheat emotionally on my wife. I detoured and got take out, then headed home. When I got home, Dana's car wasn't in the drive way. I texted her.

"Hey, brought Gold Gravy home." Gold gravy was the code word we used to use for the almond chicken and gravy we used to eat all the time. I avoided it a lot now, but like the cheese cake, it made it's way into my diet.

"I've been avoiding trans fats, but thanks. I'll be home in a few."

Hell, I couldn't even do that good enough.

By the time she got home, I was in the TV room watching Netflix, something I seldom made time for. I quickly changed from the documentary on roller derby I had been watching when I heard her car pull up, to Tombstone, one of the greatest movies ever.

"Hey," she called into me from the entry way. "I was at kickboxing with Anne. I'm all sweaty. I grabbed a chicken wrap on the way, so I'm going to hit the shower and then Bed. 'Night."

It was just like many of the nights I'd spent the past couple years. Alone.

Except, in 30 minutes I was supposed to chat with Jane. I turned down the volume, unnecessary since we had soundproofed the tv room, but my adolescent mind wouldn't let me keep the volume up, and changed it back to the Roller derby show.

BING the app chimed. Shit. I hurriedly muted my phone.

"Heya, businessman."

"Heya, coffee girl."

"I'm horny." Damn that was forward of her.

I decided I was going to be that way too. "Isn't that why we're here?"

"My girlfriend is out with her friends. It's a peril of our kind of relationship."

I was a little shocked. "Like a lesbian one?"

"Yeah."

"I've heard of that. Lesbian bed death, right?"

"LoL... sure. You read too much."

"Never been accused of that. My wife is out of town myself."

"What are your hands like?"

"Largish. Soft from office work, but calloused in places from working out."

"Ass man, breast man, other man?"

"Leg man. Honestly, I like a thick thigh, but your legs remind me of high school, so I've become enamored."

"Talk dirty to me."

"What are you wearing."

"Original."

"Hey, it sets the mood."

"Ok. Blue wig, white satin teddy with black lace and a black thong."

God that was delicious.

"I would love to feel your breasts through the slick cloth of your teddy. I'd knead them like loaves of bread. Slowly, tentatively, I'd pull at and tease your nipple rings. I'd love to feel them get hard with those little metal bars through them."

"God, that's hot."

"Then I'd put my mouth over one and get the material all wet as I suckled you. I'd pull and tease the bar with my lips and tongue while my hands explored the curve of your back and ass."

"Yeah... go on."

"I'd switch when you guided my mouth to the other one. You'd crush my head against your breast and I'd pull your hips to me so you could feel how hard you'd made me in my jeans."

"God, I love a topless man in jeans."

I was getting seriously worked up, in the dark, alone.

"I'd pick you up and place you on our bed. I'd lay along side you so you could feel how hard I was. I'd run my hand up and down your body while I continued on your breast with my mouth."

"Oh yeah."

"I'd run my hand up your teddy, slowly, enjoying your silky skin. Up your belly and down to the top of your panties. I'd rub the heel of my palm against you. Grinding slowly. Feeling you move your hips."

There was no reply.

"I want you to touch yourself. Like I would."

"Dirty."

"Shh. Just read."

"I'd run a finger under the edge of your panties, back and forth, feeling the delicate skin there and just the edge of your hair.

"Then I'd curl my whole hand over your mound and rub up and down. I'd feel your lips and where your legs meet you, rubbing there gently before I concentrated on where I feel the moisture coming from.

"I'd dip my middle finger in as I went up and down with the rest of my hand. I'd seek out your little nub at the top, and once I was slick enough, I'd dip into you at the bottom. Shallow at first, but as it got more slick, I'd go deeper, curling it up against the top where I'd love looking for your G-spot.

"Put your other hand on your breast as I would my mouth. Tease your nipple. Pinch it a little, and roll it at the same time. Now knead the whole thing.

"I'd keep doing that as I added my index finger beside my middle. Softly and slowly I'd circle your clit a few times, then I'd slide deep inside you. Back and forth I'd do that.

"I can feel you getting close. You are gripping onto my fingers.

"Keep going.

"Imagine me beside you, I'm stroking myself watching you get close to cumming.

"I'd love to look into your eyes.

I was stroking while I typed with one hand. I sat the phone down and closed my eyes, imagining in vivid detail what she looked like on her profile. I placed my shirt over myself as I came harder than I had in recent months. When I regained my breath there was a picture message.

On the back drop of a white sheet, was a pair of sexy woman's fingers with a creamy fluid over them.

"We made me squirt."

Fuck that was hot.

"So sexy!" I typed when I'd cleaned my self up as best I could.

"We made me squirt too."

"LoL" she typed. "Wish I could have been there for that. I love the feeling of it against my breasts."

"That would have been so hot," I replied. There was a long pause. I was wondering what I should say.

"Maybe we should meet..."

I hadn't expected it so soon, but wasn't that what we were here for? I waited a few seconds before I answered. "Ok."

"There's a little Hotel on East Weston avenue called the Fillmore. Heard of it?"

"Yeah. They have great Bloody-mary's."

"Famous for it. My buddy Trish is the night manager. She can get me cheap rates. Saturday night at 8, go to the desk and ask for a message for John (the name I gave her). I'll take care of the rest."

"I'd like to help pay."

"You can't pay, but if things work out, you can buy breakfast."

And with that she logged off. I'm not sure what happened after that, I think I intended to head to bed, but I know I fell asleep in my recliner and had dirty, dirty dreams of a girl with no face that smelled like coffee with blue hair and warm skin.

I woke to the usual sounds of Dana getting ready in the morning. I was still in my sweats and had grabbed another shirt from the laundry before heading up to my bedroom. I'd started sleeping in another room when I gained all that weight. She said my snoring kept her up, so away I went. Ultimately, it was a good thing; if I wasn't going to get sex, at least I didn't need to get teased by sleeping next to her. Hell, it'd been 6 months or so since I'd even seen her naked.

I showered, shaved and dressed for work in the spare room. Every room had it's own bathroom, and that suited Dana just fine. I opened my room's door to the hallway just as she was closing hers. She looked stunning in a light gray skirt suit and white dress shirt. She was beautiful, but the scowl on her face said she didn't see the same in me.

"Morning," I croaked

"Good of you to actually use your bed." She was a beautiful roommate, but definitely a grumpy one.

"I got caught up in some online game." It was nearly true. I shrugged my shoulders and she shook her head in obvious disgust.

"Well we have dinner with Lori and Dale tonight at 1845. I've already talked to Jon and he's added it to your schedule. He said you are light today, so no canceling. Dale's your oldest friend. Don't cancel on him." With that, she checked her phone and began typing furiously on it's screen as she navigated the stairs to the living room on autopilot.

Work was work. I had nothing real to do, and all day to get it done. Well, that and think of my adventurous barista all day. At a meeting I found myself doodling her name, though even I was pretty sure it was bullshit, and when Jon told me he was going, I found my self alone in my office. Emboldened by the thought of my impending adultery, I decided to get a some new clothes to go with my new fake life.