Steps to Licking Pussy Ch. 05

I spent most of the next two weeks in an exuberantly happy daze. I'd drift through my classes, lazily drive home, and sit around just thinking about Rebecca and waiting until she was free from hanging out with Jennifer. At first, almost every free minute Rebecca had was spent on me, and we tried to watch movies or go out, but invariably kept ending up having sex... intense, mind-blowing, passionate, deep sex... although never quite as long as that first night after we got Jennifer to finger us both, when Rebecca and I had rotated resting and getting each other off practically until the sun came up... that night had been amazing. Although I noticed her willingness slowly starting to drop again after the first few days, I didn't think anything of it. Jennifer, for her part, practically disappeared from my radar for the entire two weeks.

Sometime in those two weeks, a realization crept up on me. When it finally hit me that I was so happy because of my relationship with Rebecca, I just smiled and bit my own lip, thinking about how crazy I was about her. In fact, I kept finding myself looking around at guys and wondering what I'd ever seen in them. My thoughts kept toying with the word bisexual, and something about how Rebecca had slid through all my defenses and gotten me so overwhelmingly into the private pleasures of another girl... something about that turned me on immensely... but I wasn't really bisexual, I told myself, because the only girl I'd ever consider dating was Rebecca. I just liked to have sex with her, because she understood the thrill of controlling and being controlled, that's all. It was just about getting off, and who doesn't like getting off, right? I mean, I'd told her I was falling for her, but she'd never said it back... I tried not to think about that.

As the days wore on, I would catch myself looking in the mirror at my own reflection, tracing my soft brown eyes, my long brown hair, the curves of my own neck and breasts, trying to feel what it would be like to think of that familiar face I'd looked at my whole life as a bisexual. What would people think when they saw me? I knew it was silly to think I'd look different at all, but still... I felt incredibly attractive when I started thinking about myself that way.

I started noticing how flirty all the females around me were with me, and I started wondering if they found me sexy, and I started thinking about how common being at least a little bi seemed to be. I felt sexy when I thought of myself as bisexual, because I had this growing fantasy idea that I could probably seduce pretty much any of the girls I knew. Not that I would want to, I kept telling myself, because it was just Rebecca in particular that I had fallen for, not girls in general.

I accidentally let that fantasy slip one night when Rebecca and I were hanging out at my apartment. She didn't really say anything about it at first, which was disappointing, because I had hoped revealing my little fantasy would help re-spark her fading interest. She didn't say much... but she did, however, start drinking her beer noticeably faster, and got me to do the same. She even busted out the huge half-empty jug of wine left over in my fridge from a party a few days before. A few more glasses of wine later I was definitely warm and tipsy, smiling broadly and dumbly as Rebecca stumbled around laughing and looking for the TV remote. She finally managed to turn the TV off, and fell into a sitting position next to me on the couch. Holding her near-empty glass of wine aside, she leaned in very close to me. Her hot breath smelled of wine, and her soft lips were immensely attractive. I kept glancing between her lips and her sharp green eyes, unable to decide which entranced me more.

"So..." she said softly, leaning in very close to my face. "We never really talked about what you said to me after the last time we saw Jennifer, did we?"

I immediately tensed up with anticipation and excitement. I'd been hoping so badly that she would say something about that. I'd told her that I was falling for her, and she'd indirectly avoided saying it back to me. I hadn't noticed that night, distracted as I was by the hours of sex with her, but, when her interest had started to fade in the last week or so, it had definitely been on my mind.

"No, we didn't..." I said back to her slowly, very conscious of her lips an inch from mine, and of her moist breath on my face.

"We never really... defined what this is, did we?" she asked as she slid a hand around the back of my neck, her warm fingers curling under my hair. "Well... what do you want me to be?"

As she asked, she moved forward slightly, bringing her soft lips into contact with mine. I kissed her, tasting the wine on her tongue, and she pulled me into her to kiss me harder. Her question filled me with excitement - I had just been thinking that her interest was fading... this sudden turnaround was amazing! It didn't take long for a single word to resound in my thoughts as we kissed. I kept thinking the word girlfriend, and it blew me away... the whole idea... my whole situation, how I ended up sitting her on my couch, kissing another girl, and on the verge of asking her to be my... girlfriend!

Could I really do this? The image of the two of us holding hands while walking out in public felt strange... as did the thought of telling my friends, who still had no idea, or... damn, my parents! I thought about my lost best friend, wondering how much she must have gone through to work up the courage to confess that she loved me. I suddenly felt utterly terrible... which, strangely, prompted me to finally say what I was thinking out loud. Maybe I said it to avoid thinking about what I'd done to my best friend, maybe I said it to somehow try to make up for the mistake I could never undo... either way, I blurted it out.

"My girlfriend," I said in between desperate kisses. "I want you... so badly... to be my girlfriend..."

Rebecca pulled away for a moment and laughed softly, her face pressed against mine. I could see her smiling out of the corner of my eye, happy... but I was only feeling shock. For an intense, deep moment, I had forgotten Rebecca was even there. When I had said that, I had really been talking to my lost best friend, in my heart and mind. That was probably the first moment when I finally realized that I had been fooling myself. All of the messing around with Rebecca and Jennifer... it was just a lost and misguided attempt to fill the void left by my idiotic mistakes with my best friend. I really had loved her back, I'd just been too afraid to say it!

I suddenly found myself sitting there, drunk, feeling terrible, and crying. Tears ran down my face, almost uncontrollably. Rebecca backed off, sitting a foot or two away, probably wondering what the hell was wrong with me. All this time, all the thinking about my best friend and wondering where she was, I'd just been trying to deny the truth. Rebecca was my desperate attempt at a replacement for my lost best friend, and... I suddenly felt angry, black inside, and sick all at once, because, once my fog of self-delusion lifted, Rebecca's real personality was all too obvious.

A million things that I wanted to say to her ran through my head... biting things, sarcastic things, angry things. Her interest in me lasted only as long as I proved an interesting participant in her controlling games. How could I not have seen it? She had already been losing interest again, until I mentioned that fantasy of seducing another girl to her, then she was suddenly gung ho again...! Had she been planning to try to manipulate me into seducing another girl? What had I been thinking, getting tangled up with someone like her? And, Christ, what we'd done to Jennifer... damnit! This girl was so... so... gah!

I wanted to say something angry, but I didn't. Instead, a new cold, black sharpness inside me came up with a different idea. I suddenly stopped crying, all my emotion gone. I wiped away my tears, and put on a smile.

"I'm fine, I was just really emotional for a second," I told Rebecca, watching her relax. "I really care about you, you know that?"

"Really?" Rebecca asked, her green eyes cautious. I touched a hand to her sleek red hair. My unsteady fingers reminded me that I was drunk, but my mind still seemed sharp enough to pull off the first step of my plan.

"Yeah..." I said slowly. "Enough that I trust you... to help me with my fantasy."

Rebecca's eyes lit up almost instantly, confirming my cynical opinion of her.

"Yes..." I continued. "Will you help me... seduce another girl?"

"Can she be a straight girl?" Rebecca asked excitedly, a huge smile on her face.

"Of course!" I said back to her, widening my fake smile. I wasn't sure what my goal was yet, but I knew that I had the upper hand now. I had to protect Jennifer from her, and at the same time, make sure Rebecca could never control or hurt anybody again. The thought sounded sinister to me... but it also excited me. Turning Rebecca's manipulations around back on her could prove be an incredible turn-on, judging by how much I had enjoyed controlling Jennifer. This time, the victim would actually deserve it.

In the mean time, the alcohol was really getting to me, and Rebecca was drunk, warm, and soft. I gently pulled her to me, guiding her hands to my belt. She laughed and smiled up at me as she pulled my pants down, completely unaware of my shift in perspective. Her bright green eyes met mine as she kissed down my tummy, pausing just above my sex.

"So tomorrow, we'll start searching for a straight girl to seduce together?" Rebecca asked with barely masked intent, making me wonder how I'd ever fallen for her manipulations. "What if we... wow, what if we could get her to swear off men? That would be crazy hot..."

I smiled widely at the thought, and put a hand in her sleek red hair.

"Yes, that's a great idea," I replied, genuinely excited, although for a different reason than Rebecca thought. That had probably been part of her controlling game the whole time, thinking she could convince me I was bisexual or a lesbian. Would I have ended up her sex slave, addicted to doing whatever she wanted for her sadistic games? God, that's what she had in mind for Jennifer! I'd almost fallen for it all, too, only to be strangely saved at the last moment by my lost best friend. I didn't care what label I was anymore, only that I'd loved my best friend, and messed it all up. She may have been a girl, but that didn't matter to me. I resolved to find her as soon as I could.

I looked down at Rebecca's eyes as she watched me back. She had no idea that she'd just given me the idea for the perfect revenge. She smiled up at me from just above my sex.

With the hand I still had in her hair, I gently pushed her down, watching as her tongue and soft lips pressed against me. I watched her eyes carefully as she licked me, slid her tongue in me, and then sucked on my clit. Her tongue felt great, but my thoughts felt better. I knew now that she was just going down on me to get me to do whatever she wanted... she might not even enjoy going down on a girl... but I aimed to change that. I had no idea if it was even possible to change someone's orientation, but what mattered is that Rebecca thought it was possible. I kept a gentle pressure on the back of her head as she continued to lick me and smile up at me every so often, probably excited at the thought that she would get me to seduce another girl soon. She had no idea that I had her in mind.

"Yes," I said again, softer, holding her against my sex a little tighter as she licked happily. "We'll find a girl to dominate..."

***

Jennifer:

For two weeks, I hadn't heard from Kira, and I hadn't tried to contact her... but the experiences were anything but gone from my thoughts. Hanging out with Rebecca was difficult, and I kept finding any excuse to leave. For the first few days, all of my free time was spent masturbating in a haze and replaying that mind-blowing animal orgasm in my car that I'd had after fingering both of them at once. I'd finally broken through my barriers, and it was overwhelming. I just sat at home for days getting myself off, and it was the best thing I'd ever experienced. The physical and mental sensations of all I'd done with Kira and Rebecca were so damn erotic!

Until... those sensations started to fade. Six days into those two weeks, I started to forget the exact sensations of the experience. Getting off had grown harder, and frustration had seeped in. By day eight, I wasn't able to get off anymore... and I was hard up, in a bad way. I could never go back to a life without orgasms... I just couldn't... not after finally getting to experience getting off!

I found myself searching. I hit the internet hard, but porn didn't really work. It just didn't speak to me. I tried to read some erotic novels, and they got me close, but they weren't enough. Still, I kept cutting away from both mediums whenever I strayed too far into lesbian themes. I could feel that pull there, inside me, imagining soft skin and full breasts and... everything else... but... I was afraid. Erotic novels made it all too real, too acknowledged, and too emotional. I didn't want to be a lesbian, or talk about feelings, or fall for my best friend... I just wanted to get off!

That's how I found myself at the lesbian club near my apartment on the fourteenth night. I kept arguing with my own thoughts. I told myself that I didn't know how I'd ended up there, and that I wasn't sure why I was there... but I knew exactly what I was doing. Once there, I downed mixed drinks like there was no tomorrow and took in the atmosphere from the bar.

The sexuality amid the pounding music and dim lights was intoxicating. Girls danced with each other on the floor and flirted with each other at the bar. I knew that I wasn't interested in talking to the girls... not that I was interested in girls at all, I kept telling myself. At some point, my gaze lingered too long on a lithe girl with long brown hair that reminded me of Kira, and she came over, smiled, and grabbed me by the hand before I could protest.

She led me to the dance floor, pulling me close to grind to the rhythm, and my drunken instincts took over. I'd left my drink at the bar, but I was pretty smashed and didn't need it anymore. Both of my hands found their way around her as her touches slid up and down my body. I grew heated from the dancing and the closeness of her soft skin and breath. Two songs in, she leaned in and kissed me, and I dove into the sensations of making out with her. It was way different than my first threesome with Kira and Rebecca, which was the only time I'd made out with girls. I was more experienced, more able to move and feel her and kiss her deeply...

My thoughts kept leaping around in chaos. I was going out of my mind with frustrated horniness, and part of my thoughts shocked me by insisting that I fuck the shit out of this girl so I could start getting off again. Another part of me jumped to later that night. Would I have to go down on her? The thought put me off. I wouldn't be given respectful control like Kira gave me in our times together. Would this girl make me do it? Still another part of my mind spiraled in shock that I was thinking all of this about a girl, though that voice was quieter than it might have been. The loudest thought of all was simply aversion to what was happening because it wasn't Kira or Rebecca. I... missed their pussies...

I broke away then, practically darting for the nearest safe place to hide and collect my thoughts. I went to the nearest bathroom, passed a couple of girls making out inside, and leaned against the wall in a stall. Before I could think or close the door, the girl I'd made out with appeared in front of me. She grinned wickedly. It was only then that I realized my mistake, and what my actions had implied... a brief, intense battle flared between all my separate thoughts, but the alcohol fuzzing my brain made a clear winner of the desire to fuck this girl like crazy.

I grabbed her and flipped her around against the stall, kissing her hard. I didn't quite understand the power and edge I was feeling, but I loved it. The fact that this girl was formerly a threat to my fragile emotions only strengthened my desire to leave her quivering and satisfied - and then go masturbate to what I'd done. Her hands ran up under my shirt and found my breasts as we kissed, but my hands unzipped her tight jeans and found their way downwards. I pressed harder against her, our bodies swaying to the pounding music.

She was heated and wet, and I slipped my fingers in her to lubricate them. The warmth and newness of her folds and the slickness of her sex sparked energy throughout me, urging me on. I brought my fingers up and found her clit, working it gently at first, getting the angles right. The music hit a faster beat then, and I moved to kissing her neck so I could do her faster. She arched into me, and I pushed her down with my body, pumping pleasure through her.

The actions ran through me with a predatory fervor. I wanted to get this girl off, and hard. I increased the tempo with the music and the rhythm of her body, and she moaned into my ear. I stopped kissing her neck to look down the soft arc of her shoulder and breasts, watching her chest heave. It occurred to me that, buzzed and in the dark like we were, I wasn't even really sure what she looked like, and I liked that. At that thought, she arched forcefully into me, and I pushed back again. She thrashed against me, her sexual moans muffled in my hair. I held her down as orgasms rolled through her, and I didn't let up.

Finally, she fell back against the wall, exhausted.

I stood, breathing hard at my exertions, and feeling incredible. I said something cheerful and strode out of that bathroom. As soon as I hit the door, I bolted, shaking. I wasn't sure where the hell all that edge had come from, but I wasn't used to it. I hit the cool night air and hurried to my apartment. The blocks flashed by, and suddenly I was home. I literally closed the door and slumped against it, my hands already down my pants.

My panties were soaked, and I was steaming from my own sweat. Ecstasy already sparked at each thought of what I'd just done, making me shudder before I even got my fingers down there. I used my left hand on myself while smelling her scent on my right. My fingers still glistened a bit despite my run through the night, a testament to how wet she had been. I felt strong and sexual and hot and sharp all at once, and... oh god, it felt good! The heat blazed through me as I came again and again... and I kept getting off until I physically couldn't fight through the sweat and exhaustion anymore, feeling the girl's slick sex on my fingers the entire time. Finally, I collapsed sideways onto the carpet.

It was only then that my thoughts returned. I was shocked, surprised, worried, and satisfied all at once. What the hell had that been? I had never seen that side of myself before... and it had been incredible... but could I really pull off something like that every time I needed to masturbate? I might have just gotten lucky. If that girl had taken me back to her apartment, I might not have had the strength to do what I wanted and leave before she made me... go down on her...

My breathing slowed after awhile, and I checked my phone.

I had a text from Kira...!

Hey, can we talk?

I was never more glad to see a text. I laid there on my carpet, sweaty and satisfied but mostly shocked, holding my sticky hand up gingerly and wondering what to think. I needed to talk to someone. I needed her advice, if I could even bring myself to ask the questions that burned in my mind. I needed to understand what the hell was happening to me... so I texted her back.