Surefoot - Imbarrazzo Ch. 03

USS Surefoot, Deck 2, Counselor's Office, 1600 Hours:

The six members of Alpha Squad sat in a circle on the floor with varying degrees of apprehension, with Kami among them, smiling at each in turn. "Some of you have already had solo sessions with me, but for the rest, this is the first time we've met professionally, so I need to put down a few ground rules about our times in here, requirements we need to agree upon.

The first requirement for being in here, whether individually or as a group, is Discretion. This is meant to be a safe and secure place, what's said in here stays in here. We do not discuss it outside, whether with colleagues, family members, anyone else. This applies to me as well, unless what I learn here might affect the health and safety of yourselves or others. Violation of this is a very serious offence.

The next requirement is Openness. Knowing that confidentiality will be maintained in here, we should feel secure enough to open up. That 'we' includes me; you can ask me anything, and I promise I'll answer it if I can."

Sitting opposite her, trying to look cool and casual, Giles folded his arms across his chest and asked, "Anything at all?"

"Yes, Giles. It wouldn't be fair of me to hold back while still expecting you to do otherwise."

"No matter how personal?"

"Do you want to test me? Go on, then."

He smirked. "Okay: what was the best sex you ever had?"

"Giles!" Sasha, sitting on Kami's right, snapped.

"Class act as always," Neraxis grumbled.

"You are a braying ass," Eydiir declared, glowering at him.

But Kami held up a hand. "Settle down. I did say he could ask." She focused on Giles again, her voice becoming more melodic, sultry. "Well, if you're asking who was my favourite lover, it would have to be Rmorra, a Caitian male who served as a Starfleet security officer assigned to the Federation Archaeological Bureau, protecting ancient planetary sites from scavengers." She leaned back and smiled with the memories invoked. "He had a scent like honey and sandalwood, fur the colour of chocolate, pointed-tipped ears, and shoulders a light year wide. And when he was inside me... he made my body sing."

The room was still, but then her eyes grew sad. "He was my husband. He was the father of my cub. And he was my best friend. And the only time he ever made me cry was the day he was shot in the back and killed by raiders on a nameless planet, for some broken pottery."

The room grew unbearably silent. Giles' expression shifted from the prurient to the penitent.

"Sorry, Giles," Kami apologised. "I know you were expecting something sexy. But I didn't promise sexy, only personal." Her gaze narrowed. "How about you, Giles? What was your best sexual experience?"

"It's at the end of his right arm," Neraxis quipped, provoking titters among them, and a glare from Giles.

But the boy recovered quickly, angrily declaring, "It was just last week, actually, actually. Twins. They gave me a going away present before I left the Academy Annex."

"Twins, eh?" Kami's eyes widened with awe. "What were their names?"

Now he paled. "I, ah, shouldn't reveal their identities."

"I understand. What about first names?"

"Oh, uh... Carol. Carol, and, uh, Janet."

Kami nodded, looking to the others again. "Which brings me to the final requirement: Honesty. I know there may be times when you don't feel like participating; that's fine. But it's something else entirely to be dishonest. And as honesty is integral to a member of Starfleet, it's a serious matter."

Her gaze narrowed. "I have been a Counselor for longer than any of you have been alive. I have degrees in interspecies psychology. And my Caitian senses allow me to detect the subtle changes in your scents, your voices and expressions, everything that will tell me when you're talking shit." Now she offered Giles a final look. "So when you do talk shit, I may not say anything at the time. But I won't forget."

Now she leaned back, looking to each of them in turn. "Well? Are we agreed?"

They all made various nods or sounds of assent.

"Good. Well, most of these first group sessions tend to be boring, as nothing ever happens so soon. However, Jonas has raised something interesting for us." At his glum reaction she added, "I'll use humour to defuse tension, never to ridicule." She looked around again. "Does anyone want to say anything first?"

"Yes." Sasha leaned forward, catching Jonas' attention. "I'm sorry about what happened this morning. I didn't react the way I should have, both as your Squad Leader and your friend. And then you took off and went on your own, didn't respond to my hails. You must have been so mad at us-"

"Mad at you?" he interjected, looking confused. "I thought you were going to have me arrested!"

"Arrested? What- What for?"

"There are no Starfleet regulations prohibiting erections, Jonas," Kami informed him with a gentle smile.

"Given what I have read on the subject," Kit added helpfully, "That is probably for the best." He looked to Kami. "Did you know erections can occur from stress, relaxation, turbulent transportation... they even happen during their sleep?"

She grinned. "Yes, I've heard."

"But what about the policies against..." Jonas paled. "Sexual misconduct and harassment?"

"The definitions of sexual misconduct and harassment are by necessity broad," Kami informed him, looking to the others again. "And open to interpretation. Did anyone feel threatened by what happened?"

"Absolutely not," Sasha declared.

"Hell, no," Neraxis added.

"You have proven yourself to loyal and tenacious," Eydiir contributed. "Not threatening."

Kami looked to Kitirik. "How about you, Kit?"

The Qarari's throat folds reddened. "I feel more sympathetic than threatened. The humanoid male reproductive system seems... needlessly complicated."

"You should read up about the female systems," Sasha offered with a smile.

Now Kami indicated Giles. "And you, sport? Were you threatened?"

Giles smirked. "Not from the size of what I saw, no."

"Son of a bitch, Giles!" Sasha exclaimed, looking ready to throttle him. "Are you a natural jerk or have you worked hard at it all your life?"

At everyone's agreeing reactions, Giles breathed out, looked to Jonas and muttered peevishly, "Sorry, okay? I was just joking. It happens to all guys."

"Then why didn't you say something, Friend Giles?" Kit asked. As everyone looked to him, the Qarari continued. "When I later understood more fully the biological and societal issues involved, I realised I had made a grievous error in protocol with my questioning. But you cannot claim ignorance. Friend Jonas has been consistently cordial and accommodating to you in all the times I have witnessed you two together. Yet you said nothing to support or comfort him. What if it had been you in his embarrassed position?"

Eydiir spoke up now, glaring at Giles. "A good question."

"This is confusing for me," Kit confessed. "Friend Giles, please forgive me if I have overstepped my social boundaries-"

"No. No, you haven't." A more subdued Giles looked to Jonas again. "Sorry, pal. And... I'm sorry about this morning. You're... you're a good teammate."

"Jonas," Sasha said softly, blushing a little. "If it makes you feel any better, you're not the only one who's had... spontaneous moments. I've had them. Probably the other girls, too. We're just lucky it's not as obvious with us."

"Speak for yourself," Neraxis added, nudging Jonas, "Sometimes my nipples could cut duranium."

Kami suppressed a smile at Kit's reaction to the joke. "No one here is exempt from embarrassing moments, myself included - someday I may tell you what happened to me at a funeral when I was much younger - and living together, you will see each other's dirty underwear, both physical and figurative. You'll see each other naked, you'll know who's having their periods, or breaking wind, or even who's shedding their skin," She smiled at Kit's flushed reaction to that last example. "And there may be more... spontaneous moments.The important thing is that you'll learn to accept each other, to trust each other, and to give each other space when necessary. And Jonas, I think you'll look back on today as something to laugh about."

Jonas nodded - but he was wiping tears from his face.

"What is it?"

He breathed in, looking both stressed and relieved. "I was- I was worried that I'd have to leave. I- I grew up alone, with just my mother and the workers in her company around me. No one my age. Then I joined Starfleet Academy, and met so many amazing people... you guys are the best. So, I was just afraid that you wanted me out."

Sasha smiled at him. "It would take a lot more than what happened to do that."

"Indeed," Eydiir agreed. "As we have not yet disembowelled Giles, it is obvious that our standards must be extremely low."

Giles gave the Capellan a sarcastic thumbs up.

Beside him, Neraxis pointed at Jonas' chest. "What have you spilled down here?"

Jonas looked down - as her blue finger shot up and flicked his nose.

She grinned. "You gotta be more on the ball than that, Scrappy. You got a Big Sister now."

Everyone smiled, as Kami wound up the proceedings. "Well, that worked out well. Maybe we can move onto a less-embarrassing topic for all of you? Anyone have anything to bring up?"

"I do, Respected Counselor," Kit offered. "What can you tell me about masturbation?"

Deck 2, Executive Officer's Quarters, 2200 Hours:

T'Varik had been in the midst of reaching a new meditative level when her door chime rang. The disappointment and annoyance she felt for 6 milliseconds was examined and mentally filed away for further scrutiny as she rose from her meditation mat, slipped into a simple black robe and approached her door. "Open."

Hrelle's frame filled the doorway. "Commander, am I disturbing you?"

"Yes, but to a manageable degree. How may I assist you?"

"I need to bring you up to date on a situation involving one of the cadets. And... I would like some advice from my First Officer."

She regarded him for a moment, before stepping aside. "Computer: raise illumination to standard levels. Do you require me to lower the room temperature, Sir?"

"No, it makes me feel at home, though ours wasn't such a dry heat." He sighed. "This is about Mr Arrington."

She made an almost discernible effort not to display a discernible reaction. "He is proving to be an enduring figure in this mission."

He recounted the messages from Captain Arrington, and the increasing hostilities between Hrelle and her. When he was done, he breathed out and said, "So, I was wondering about your opinion. Am I being unreasonable?"

"Yes."

He blinked and asked, "You don't want to take your time, have a good think about it before giving me your answer?"

"There is no need. You repeatedly acted inappropriately to a simple request."

"It wasn't a request, it was a demand! Like she was still an upperclassman and I was the lowly plebe her brothers could piss on!"

"Nevertheless, you should not allow your past experience to affect your present behaviour. Granted, it was not put through proper channels, but it was in the end a simple communications request."

He grunted, conceding the point. "Maybe you're right. Maybe I-"

Hrelle's combadge chirped. "Bridge to Captain."

He tapped the badge. "What is it, Chief?"

The gruff Tellarite voice came through loud and clear. "Captain, sensors have picked up a Starfleet vessel on an intercept course with us at high warp. Its registry signal records it as the USS Impala."

Hrelle looked to T'Varik as he replied, "Thanks, Chief. I'm on my way." As he tapped the comlink shut, he asked the Vulcan, "I know your shift isn't starting for another two hours-"

"I will get dressed and meet you on the bridge directly." She turned and started slipping out of her robe; Hrelle was already out the door.

On the bridge, Grev vacated the Captain's chair, but Hrelle had stopped at the station occupied by Lt. Abed, the Security officer, a confident, experienced man whom Hrelle wished had more to do on this mission. That wish now dogged at him. "Mr Abed, glad you're on duty. Think I might need someone other than one of the kids on Tactical."

The Terran grinned. "You think Starfleet's declared war on us?"

Hrelle was grateful that T'Varik had stepped onto the bridge, giving him a chance to not answer that while he finally took his seat. "Hail them."

The Beta Shift Ops officer, an Andorian cadet whose name escaped him at the moment, frowned. "Trying, Sir, but they're not responding."

Hrelle's hackles rose, but he kept calm. "Helm, stay on course to Karakol, Warp 4. Mr Abed, what's our weapons status?"

Hrelle felt the stares on the back of his head. "Our weapons, Sir?"

"Yes, you know, the things we use when we get into fights. What's our status?"

"They- Phasers and photon torpedoes are operational but offline, as expected. I don't- Sir, the Impala is on a parallel course, but at Warp 8. They're passing us... turning... Sir, it's on a direct heading for us!"

"Helm, full stop. Go to Yellow Alert."

From her own station on Hrelle's right hand side. T'Varik looked to him. "Captain, are you sure this is-"

He shot her a look. She was astute enough to cut off any further protest.

"We're at full stop, Sir," the Helm officer informed him. "Impala dead ahead, reducing speed... Warp 6... 4... 2..."

Hrelle heard the bridge doors open again, and a scent told him who it was without him looking; he hoped the Counselor wouldn't interfere. "Try hailing them again."

"Aye, Sir." A moment later, she announced. "No response."

Hrelle felt his grip on the arms of his chair tighten. What was Lucille playing at? Leaving her assigned patrol route to come here over a stupid request? Did she really think she could come here and make him roll over and meow for her again? "Where's the Impala?"

"Almost two hundred thousand kilometres dead ahead."

"Put it onscreen."

The viewscreen altered, and then they all saw the imposing shape of the Nebula-class cruiser: larger, younger, faster and better-armed than the Surefoot. In another life, he might have eventually captained a ship like that.

But that life wasn't this one.

"I... do not comprehend Captain Arrington's behaviour," T'Varik admitted.

Hrelle grunted. "She's stepped in front of us, showing how big and intimidating she is. Ops, has there been any response to our repeated hails?"

"No, Sir."

He steeled himself. Fine, be like that, you bitch... "Go to Red Alert! Shields up, bring all weapons online!"

The ship responded to his command automatically, as the klaxon sounded and the light strip running around the circular bridge over every station suddenly went to apple red. But the living components of his ship weren't automatic.

Until he roared, "NOW!"

Then he felt the crew jump into action, even as the tension and confusion multiplied, their collective training overcoming any hesitation they may have had over his orders.

"Shields up," Abed responded. "Phasers and photon torpedoes online, Sir!"

"Any response from the Impala?"

"They've raised shields, Sir, and- now there's an incoming hail!"

"As expected. Put it onscreen."

Seconds later, the image of the Impala was replaced by a bridge, similar to the Surefoot's but larger, the image focusing on its Captain's chair, and the middle-aged Terran female with copper hair and a rounder face than Hrelle remembered it. If he had been of a different frame of mind, he might think she looked handsomer now than when he last saw her years ago.

Until she opened her mouth. "Hrelle! What the hell are you playing at? How dare you lock weapons on another Starfleet vessel? I knew you couldn't be trusted-"

"Captain Arrington," he said calmly over the klaxon, "Welcome to our little part of the sector. And... thank you."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Why, for assisting us with a test of our Red Alert drill, of course. We appreciate you deviating from your normal patrol, and we hope it hasn't inconvenienced you too much."

She looked stunned, but then her scowl returned. "No. No, you won't get away with what you've done. I'll see to that!"

He made a show of appearing slightly hurt. "Oh. Well, perhaps you'd like to come aboard so we can discuss this matter, or any other you'd care to raise?"

"You bet I do!"

"Fine, I'll have my transporter officer liaise with yours and-"

She cut off her end of the transmission.

He relaxed, a little. "Cancel Red Alert, drop shields, release weapons lock on the Impala and secure from General Quarters. And have Cadet Arrington come to the bridge and await further orders. Don't tell him why."

The bridge crew visibly relaxed as well. Counselor Kami stepped down next to his chair, her voice low. "You okay?"

He nodded, looking to T'Varik. "I want you with me in the meeting, as an objective witness. Feel free to speak up at any stage if you believe it it's appropriate."

She nodded. "Will you meet Captain Arrington in the transporter room?"

"No," Kami spoke up now. "Make her meet you, on your terms."

Hrelle smiled. "Fine. But you get to escort her to my office. Think you can do it without killing her along the way?"

She drew up with mock indignation. "I am the very font of diplomacy, Captain, Sir."

Deck 1, Captain's Office:

Hrelle was sitting behind his desk, with T'Varik standing beside him, as the door slid open, and Kami entered, with Captain Arrington - and a security guard Hrelle didn't recognise. The woman nodded towards Hrelle. "There, Mr Esbirro. Arrest him."

Hrelle folded his hands on top of his desk, his voice and expression still genial. "That seems a rather extreme greeting, Captain."

"It is also without foundation or legality," T'Varik informed her.

Arrington glared back. "Who the hell are you?"

"I the hell am Commander T'Varik, the First Officer."

"Well, I'd think a Vulcan would be the first one to recognise that attempting to attack another Starfleet vessel is a court martial offence!"

"No offence has been committed by Captain Hrelle. Indeed, he has followed Starfleet regulations."

"Excuse me?"

"General Order 12: When approaching a vessel with which communication has yet to been established, all Starfleet vessels are to maintain maximum safety precautions, regardless of the origin of said vessel, be it a foreign power, a hitherto unknown ship, or a Starfleet vessel."

"I still remember reading about the incident involving Admiral Kirk encountering a commandeered USS Reliant," Hrelle reminisced, as if they were sitting around a table making small talk. "Many lives were lost at that time because he disregarded that Order. Definitely not one of his more laudable moments. You performed your part in the role of the aggressor perfectly, Captain."

T'Varik folded her hands behind her back. "It has been recorded that you repeatedly refused to respond to our hails, and that your ship took a hostile stance against ours. You may still wish to file a complaint with Starfleet Command, but the resulting investigation will decide in our favour - and of course they will be made aware of your original reasons for contacting us." She raised an eyebrow. "As will your own crew."

Arrington's face tightened, then she glanced at her security guard. "Wait outside for me."

"Yes, Ma'am."

As he left, Arrington added, nodding towards Kami, who was leaning against a nearby wall, tail lazily swishing behind her. "Send your Counselor out."