Surrender Ch. 3

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You begin to rediscover yourself with His help.
1.7k words
4.88
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Part 3 of the 5 part series

Updated 09/22/2022
Created 10/20/2000
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As the morning sun leaks through the curtains the next morning, you awake to a very familiar, yet unrecognizable aroma. You roll over on the bed, wrapped tight in a warm quilt, and prop yourself up on your elbows. You notice the binds still attached to the bed hanging loosely from each post. Across the room you see him standing there, his back to you. He is half dressed, wearing a pair of Levi's with no shirt and barefoot. You think back on the night before, you smile and a warm glow overcomes your body. Never in your life have you felt this way about another person. Until now, your life's work has been your two wonderful children, they are everything to you.

You remember how emotional you were the moment each were born. You let down at the birth of the first child and cried. People had seen you. You were angry with yourself afterwards, crying is for the weak. You felt just as happy the second time, but fought off the tears. You would not let anyone see you weak, you could be stronger than them always, or so you thought. Now that they are yours alone, you realize how lonely you have been your entire life. How without even knowing it, you have been searching, drifting really, lost without an anchor. Your life had no real course, nothing that made you look forward to the future. Was it just as much your fault as anyone else's? Had you built so many walls around you that it trapped you in as much as it held everyone out? You thank God that there was now a definite light at the end of the tunnel and you are watching that glorious light make breakfast without him even knowing you are awake.

You wrap the quilt tighter around your naked body as you throw your legs over the edge of the bed and walk silently up behind him. "Mmmmmm, what smells so wonderful?" He doesn't answer as he turns around and smiles. "Good morning sweetheart. Hungry?" "Famished," you reply. After a soft kiss, you cuddle against him as he dips another piece of thickly sliced, homemade bread into a batter before dropping it on a griddle. "French toast? I haven't had that in years. It was always my favorite when I was little." "I know, your mother told me. She also gave me her special recipe." Now you remember why the smell was so familiar, yet it had been so many years. "I thought she wouldn't give that up until her deathbed. How did you get it from her?" His reply was simply a smile.

You always knew that your mom really liked him, especially after the first time they met. They spent the entire time laughing and flirting, mostly at your expense but you were so glad they hit it off so well. It really made things so much easier when the hard times hit later, during the divorce. Your family understood about your situation. They too were worried about the one thing that mattered the most, the children. Knowing the way things were destined to workout really helped. The biggest obstacle in the entire plan was you, would you let the most wonderful thing ever in your life get away from you? Could you commit? Really commit to him? Love him unconditionally? Most of all, would you let him love you the same way? That has always been the problem. Yesterday's walk in the woods and last night had really opened the world up to you. A glimpse of the world you were missing. A world where you were completely open to your partner, vulnerable to everything, most of all...no walls. The pleasure of it all.

The breakfast was as wonderful, the best part was that it was served on just one plate with the two of you sharing. He cut the toast up and fed you both. You cannot remember eating so much and not feeling guilty. A lot better than that chocolate diet shake you normally had. You figured that with all the calories you burnt off last night and the thoughts of the day ahead, you would need the energy. The last thought brought a smile to your face. As you looked at him you realized he had been watching you, a look of fascination in his eyes. You could look into his eyes forever. After putting the freshly washed and rinsed dishes on the rack to dry, he turned to the counter you were sitting on and moved close to you. You open your legs to let him get closer, the quilt falling around you. He takes you in his arms and holds you close to him. Your head against the soft hairs on his chest, he smells so good. He pushes you back gently and takes your face gently into his hands. He kisses you softly. Your head spins in the pleasure of it all. It had never been this wonderful before, never. His quiet voice breaks the trance, "I love you very much and want you to marry me. I don't want you to answer me now, especially if the answer is 'no,' but wait until later. I will ask you again, answer me then, OK?" You can only nod as your eyes are locked in his. His hands slide down to your shoulder as he smiles and says, "Now get your shapely ass in the shower. We have errands to run today before we can come back here and play."

Errands?? Before we can play? Better not be paying the gas and cable bills was the first thought that shot through your head. The devilish smile that crossed his face ended any thoughts of that. Your body tingled with excitement as you hopped down off the counter and hurried off to the bathroom.

He never ceases to amaze you as you enter the bathroom and see all your beauty products awaiting you. Right down to the right shampoo and eyeliner. God, this guy pays way too much attention. You smile to yourself in the mirror, "Thanks God." As you take a hot shower, the water beats down on your skin, opening all your pores to its soothing warmth. You luxuriously soap your entire body and rinse it completely. You want to be as fresh and clean as possible for him. As you dry yourself with the oversized towel, memories of last night flash in your mind. You have a permanent smile. After drying your hair and putting on your make up you realize that you have no clothes. Almost on cue there is a soft knock at the door, it opens and he appears. His eyes scan your body before him and a huge smile appears as he hands you a stack of clothing, kisses you quickly and tells you to hurry. He then laughs as he turns and retreats back through the door. You can hear him laughing as he walks down the hallway. "Like asking a woman to hurry ever works," he chuckles. "Take your time sweetheart, you are always worth it!" You smile at his humor, but wish he were there so you could pop him with the towel.

The clothing he brought surprises you. A matching dark green bra and panty set, a pair of khaki pants, and a black shirt, all in the correct sizes of course. You have to admit, you look very nice in it. Actually, damn good! As you exit the bathroom you see him. Through the very large window near the bed, he is sitting on the porch. He is also wearing a pair of khaki pants. His polo shirt is hunter green and looks so good on him. He is leaning at the deck rail looking out over the lake. He has a distant look in his eyes as he looks at the water. You cannot help but wonder if he too has a secret place he goes during tough times. What a wonderful man. Will he let you inside?

A smile crosses your face as you realize that he already has, that was something he did a long time ago. You are thankful for the candid nature of this man. You know that he will be honest with you. You know that you can completely trust him. Although his past is less than perfect with relationships, he has never given you cause to question his honor and commitment to you. He has the passion for life that you enjoy yet he also has a quiet peace about him. He knows what he wants, and he has made it perfectly clear that it is you.

You also know he is a hopeless romantic, that part of him makes him do some wonderfully crazy things sometimes. Like the time he put your birthday announcement up on the billboard across from the mall. He even got the years right, much to your chagrin. You both ended the night laughing in each others arms as you sat in his car watching the words being replaced by an announcement of someone named Debbie having a 8lb 6oz baby boy. Then there was the time he showed up at your work with a huge Valentine card. Taped inside were two tickets to the Garth Brooks concert that night. Your boss was also in on the gift with the rest of the day off, he had set up the entire thing. He had your favorite pizza ready in his car for the 100 mile trek to the concert. During trip home, in the darkness of the interstate, you showed him your appreciation by fulfilling a fantasy he had. Thank God for cruise control. What kept you from seeing this man for all his glory before today?

"Penny for your thoughts," you say as you walk out on the deck, the door shutting silently behind you.

He blinks momentarily and smiles at you. "Just wondering about the future. I always do my best thinking sitting here, looking out at the lake. I have always felt close to water. Something about being near or on the water just seems right for me. I don't know why, just always has. I guess it is why I love it here."

"And what did you see in the future?" you ask.

A smile covers his face, a look of knowing enters his emerald eyes as he stands and says, "Lets go!"

To Be Continued...

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READ MORE OF THIS SERIES

Surrender Ch. 2 Previous Part
Surrender Series Info

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