Suspicion Ch. 02: Alternate

I sat on the edge of the tub in the bathroom, watching her as she prepared to enter the shower stall. Just before she was about to get into the water she turned to me,

"Paul," she asked, "where did you learn to do those things that you did today?"

I laughed, "Kathy, do you remember that blond bimbo secretary who works in Human Resources?"

I was joking, but when I glanced at Kathy's face, there was a look of horror on it. She hadn't considered that breaking the bonds of marriage could go both ways.

"I'm joking, honey! Please, don't cry. I got some books and DVDs on enhancing sexual pleasure. They're in the bedroom. In fact, I was hoping that we might both look them over to find new things that we might want to try out. With each other," I reassured her.

She looked relieved after that.

***

Kathy was standing next to me, clinging to me as if I might vanish if she didn't hold me tight, when the children arrived. Jason and Christi were delighted to find their mother there, waiting for them as she used to.

"Are you staying home with us now, Mom?" Christi cried. Jason didn't say anything, he just looked at her awaiting her answer.

With incipient tears in her eyes, Kathy looked at me.

"For at least the weekend, Kathy?" came my question, to which she smiled and nodded her head to me.

"We still need to talk, sweetheart. I haven't forgotten." she added.

I nodded back at her,

"After dinner when the kids are in bed. OK, my love?" I phrased it as a question, but it was really a statement.

Dinner was easy — we ordered pizza! That is always a hit with our kids, and I could tell that even though Kathy had been seeing the kids after I had kicked her out of the house, it was still different and better for her to be with all of us together. That gave me a certain hope for the future, as well as additional leverage to use in making her understand that her real emotional family was the three of us.

When the kids were finally down for the night, Kathy and I sat down in the living room together to finally have our talk. We put our chairs close together, facing each other, and Kathy reached out to put my hands on her lap, holding them with her hands. All evening she'd been constantly finding ways to touch or hold me.

I actually regarded our discussion as a negotiation in which I was going to manipulate my wife's behavior to my advantage, and to advance The Plan.

I opened up the discussion.

"Kathy, I want to be frank with you. I decided that I want to continue our marriage, and that the best way for that to happen was to have you back living with us, at least most of the time."

She looked a bit confused when I said 'most of the time', but I continued.

"My hope is that the 'relationship' that you have developed with your old boyfriend will be a transient thing, something that you will get over." I began.

Kathy was looking at me, and I could see that she was listening intently, if perhaps a little skeptical when I described Karl as a 'transient' thing. I continued,

"I believe that I can understand to some extent what happened. You and Karl — yes, it hurts me to even say his name, but I'm a big boy, and man enough to acknowledge his existence — had an emotional and loving experience together, that was suddenly broken apart by circumstances entirely out of your control.

"So a relationship that either would have either gotten closer, with the two of you marrying, or alternatively, would have wound down, as most teenage 'love affairs' do, was simply frozen in time, without a true resolution one way or another, and with only positive memories about each other.

"I can imagine the shock of suddenly being confronted by someone who you had loved, and finding that there were still feelings there, submerged, not gone.

"I don't want you to try telling me that you won't see him, since I don't believe it, and I don't want you sneaking around behind my back. So I think that you and I should try to be together, but with specific time set aside where, if you still feel the need, you can spend time with Karl.

I paused. Kathy's eyes teared up

"Paul, you are such an insightful man. I think that you know me better than I know myself." came Kathy's reply.

That wasn't bad. I was just regurgitating what the marriage counselor had told me, but I was getting credit for wisdom and insight. Kathy was really impressed and paying close attention.

"Now, we will need to set up a fixed schedule for when you will have your 'free time', but there are a few conditions that I want, nothing that I think you will find onerous, for us to reconcile," I explained.

Kathy nodded, still looking serious, but actually rather optimistic.

"First, I want you to start seeing a marriage counselor. His name is Bill Wattler, and I have been seeing him. He has helped me a lot. I would like you to see him by yourself a couple of times to discuss your situation and feelings, and explain how we have come to this impasse. Of course, I am willing to go together with you as well, but I would like you to see him one-on-one first. He is a certified professional, and is a neutral party who doesn't have an axe to grind, and won't try to push you in any direction," I paused again, and looked at her.

She squeezed my hands in hers, and smiled at me before replying.

"Of course, sweetheart, I would be happy to see him. Based on how you've been treating me today, he must have helped you a great deal. We can set up an appointment on Monday," she agreed.

"Wonderful. A second issue regards our families and friends," I continued, "At least for now, and unless we decide to get a divorce, I do not want you to engage in any activities including OUR friends, with Karl. You can do what you want with HIS friends, or people who don't know US as a couple, but please, don't humiliate me in front of people who I have to face every day. And that includes even Evelyn and Todd and their children. If any of our friends ask us over for an activity during one of your 'Karl' times, you can pass on it, I'll come up with some excuse, but please leave me with some dignity," I said, with tearing visible in my eyes.

"Oh, darling, I would never want to humiliate you like that! Of course, I understand. I want you to know, that when I've been with Karl, we've gone out of town if we were having dinner or a movie, or anything in public." A small, almost bitter smile came across Kathy's face, "Of course, I had been hoping you wouldn't find out, but I guess that isn't the issue anymore. But, I promise you, I will be discrete," she finished.

Like as if I hadn't already been humiliated. Goodness, how could this woman fool herself so?

"This may surprise you," I said, "I want you to keep your apartment, at least until we are sure that our arrangement will work out. I'm sorry, I know this is just another male ego thing, but I want to have at least the fig leaf that when you leave the kids and me here, that you aren't just running into your lover's arms, and into his bed. I want to truthfully tell the kids that as far as I know, when you aren't with us, that you are at your apartment."

Again, Kathy's face reflected the pain in mine, as she nodded her head at me.

"That's fine, Paul. In fact I want you to know something: Karl has never been to my apartment, I've kept it as 'my' retreat," Kathy sniffed a little as she told me that.

"OK. Now for the tough part, setting up a schedule," I started and looked again a Kathy's face, "Have you thought about how we would 'share' your time, your family and your lover?"

"Well," she looked off into the distance for a second, "I just more or less thought that I would split my time between you. To be honest, I hadn't really thought it out in detail."

"I'm not surprised, but I have a few thoughts that I want to run by you," I said rather firmly, since this was a key issue that I wanted for my plan.

"We should have a fixed schedule," I asserted," so that I will know when your 'free time' is, and won't be expecting to see you. Once the schedule is fixed, that's it; we won't be changing the schedule if Karl has a problem with his business, and I won't disturb you or try to reschedule if you or I have to work late, or some sort of similar problem would occur during 'our' time with you. That's how real life is," I paused, "The only exception to that rule is if there were an emergency with the kids, then I would reach out to you at any time."

As I completed my thought, I looked at her again to see if she was on board. Kathy was nodding her head.

"I would expect it, Paul," she agreed.

"Now, I think that the split in time should be 80% with your family, and limited to 20% with Karl, and let me explain why," I was now going to set the stage,

"Before your long lost lover showed up," I couldn't help the dig, but went on anyway, "There were three of us sharing your time, the children and I. Now, there is suddenly another party getting a 'share' of what had been our time. You know, of course, that most of 'our' time together is occupied by things that are really family responsibilities and obligations — kids doing homework, going to their soccer practices and games, doing the shopping, the laundry — you know the list. To be truthful, I doubt that I actually have one-on-one time with you ten percent of the time that we are 'together'! When you are with Karl, on the other hand, it's all PARTY time! You and he have nothing but one-on-one time. You can go out to dinner; no need to worry about a babysitter because you have good ol' Dad to take care of the kids. You can go dancing, take in a movie or the theater. No worries. Go back to his place and have sex — all undisturbed, no potential for kids walking in; make as much noise as you want."

"That's why I think that the split that I'm proposing is fair. Actually, I think it is still unfair to me, compared to Karl, but I'm willing to accept that my time with the children has its own value, that he can't benefit from."

"And the schedule has to take into account the 'quality' of the time as well. Karl is not entitled to have you over the weekends, and we get you during the week. Consider that we had some great 'alone' time today, and consequently had some great sex. But to find that time, we both had to take time off work, in the middle of the day, something we can't do all of the time. So can we work out something in that framework?" I asked Kathy, seriously not knowing how she would react.

She had a serious look on her face, and she was nodding her head.

"I can see that you've thought this through very throughly, Paul, and it seems as fair as any arrangement could be," came Kathy's slow response.

"Then," I said, "let's each get a calendar and work out the next couple of months."

Which we did, sitting side-by-side at the table.

And what a mess it was! One Sunday a month was 'free time', as was one Friday evening after Kathy finished work, until noon (at the latest,) the following day. Every eight weeks, there was an entire 'free' weekend for Karl, and then the rest of the 'free' time was filled in during the evenings of the week.

To be honest, I wasn't too worried about this schedule, because it was going to be moot one way or the other within a couple of months. But Kathy, not knowing any better, was very serious about it, trying to be completely fair. So she consulted her schedules for birthdays and anything that was already scheduled for 'us' and made sure that they wouldn't fall on 'free' days. Women are so organized, it's lovely to watch.

It was about 11:00 P.M. when we finished, and after a hard week, and the earth-shattering sex we'd had that afternoon, we were ready for bed.

Suddenly Kathy couldn't seem to look into my face, but cast her eyes towards the floor.

"Should I make up the guest bed to sleep in?" came her timid query.

"Heavens, woman! I took you in 'our' bed this afternoon, and that's where you sleep again, from now on!" came my immediate response.

Kathy had a smile back on her face as we walked up the stairs to our bedroom, still holding hands. In bed, we hugged and kissed, and Kathy told me I smelled of sex ("How could that be?" I joked,) but we were both worn out, and Kathy slipped away to a peaceful sleep shortly afterwards.

I lay there looking at the black ceiling, counting my victories in my mind. The Plan was advancing.

First, I had convinced Kathy to go to marriage counselor who I knew regarded her relationship with Karl as a fantasy, a juvenile infatuation, and who would try to bring an end to it. Second, I had convinced her to keep Karl her 'little secret', something that was partly my ego, but also a means of keeping them isolated as a couple from friends and family. She would keep her apartment, which was one of the more underhanded parts of The Plan. And most important: by accepting my schedule ideas and other demands, she was acquiescing to living under my rules. I was not at all happy at sharing Kathy's time (and pussy,) with Karl, but I was sure that he would be even more unhappy. After all, compared with the previous couple of months, his time with Kathy would be greatly reduced, and he would know it was because I was retaking control.

I slept very well that night, spooned up against my prodigal wife. I was going to kill her with kindness!

Because this story is derivative, I am turning off the voting, but I am keeping the comments turned on. There is a warning: if you have something intelligent to say, fine, whether it agrees with the story or not. I will delete the (alas) too typical one-liners insulting the characters as whores, or wimps, etc. Make a point, discuss the reasons for your views, got no problem with that. Also I know about STDs, so don't harp on them — it's fiction, so there's some lattitude.