Sweet Drops Of Wicked Ch. 01-02byDark_Destiny©
AUTHOR'S NOTE: this is my first time trying to submit a story. please be gentle...
(it's not fair, to deny me, of the cross I bear that you gave to me, you, you, you oughta know!)
You'd think that would be a bad thing. Getting rid of my husband was the best thing I ever did. Beyond the cheating, beyond the temper tantrums, the verbal abuse, the constant drama, beyond everything that I thought a marriage should be... I found myself giving and not getting back, at least nowhere near what a partner should. Dave was a constant struggle. We married at 20, spent the next 20 years fighting... constantly. It sucks being married to someone who has issues and refuses to address them. You can't have a healthy marriage with someone who is unhealthy. If it wasn't him coming home with his tail between his legs for making out with some girl – or worse - it was the constant need of approval and fawning over any decision he made. After a few years, I was either his wet nurse or his verbal punching bag. I shut down, partially out of spite, partially out of survival. It was when I saw pictures of him at his buddy's bachelor party with the stripper that I'd finally had it. This was not the first time it had happened, but it would be the last. At my age, I was too old for all of this. When I bombarded him with questions he finally broke... he'd slept with the girl that night. And he'd been sleeping with her ever since; two months since. Good riddance to bad baggage. If only it were that easy... It's never that easy. Those damn feelings of how things should be, and the reality of how things really were. Those damn feelings of how a wife should be in spite of a loser husband. I can hear Tammy Wynette singing "Stand By Your Man" even a year after it's all said and done. Fuck you, Tammy Wynette. Did she ever go through this???
So here I am, 40 and starting over. This is where my friend Cassie comes in. I left Dave the house and everything that our life entailed in Miami. I figured if he had so little concern for what we'd built, no matter how much the struggle, then he should take it all and shove it straight up his ass. I didn't want any of it. Everything in that house reminded me of what I fought for, only to get the shitty end of the stick. He was kind enough to buy me out of the bar that we both owned – a very cool half-mil. It was a small price in lieu of a very messy divorce where I could have gotten more (and the lawyers MUCH more). So I left, and moved to Denver with Cassie and her husband, Ron.
Cassie is a godsend. She has the most unusual, yet healthy, outlook on life that anyone could ask for. It was Cassie who told me – demanded that I – get my ass up here and enjoy everything that life has to offer. Cassie enjoys everything, it seems. She's in a perpetual state of bliss, or at least contentment. Staying with Cassie is just what I needed. She has a no bullshit, don't worry, be happy outlook on life that makes me sick sometimes. But she's happy... always happy. And she genuinely wants me to be happy. That's the amazing thing about her... she doesn't judge... ever. She's a live and let live kinda girl, almost to the extreme. She's the epitome of a free spirit. She calls it like she sees it, yet always leaves you with your dignity, and always leaves you wondering what's up with her. But there never is anything "up" with her. She does what she does, she is who she is, she loves me completely, she wants me to be happy with myself, and she's exactly what I need right now. She knows it, but she'll never tell me she knows it. This is what unconditional love means. Its true and its pure, and its from my best friend.
My things are unpacked. Or, at least as unpacked as they're gonna be. I don't need anything when I'm with her, just a set of clothes and a proper attitude. If I don't have either of those, she can provide that as well. This is why I came to Denver... to be loved, to be accepted, to find myself, and to be able to do all of that at my own pace. Its perfect...
There is one problem though... She and her second husband, Ron, have an open marriage and they're totally fine with that. Right now (ok, always) it's something that I just can't wrap my tiny brain around. Damn it, it pisses me off sometimes to see her so free and happy and me so miserable and confined. I'm the one with the hunger and the drive. I'm the one who sees everything to its detail. I'm also the one who stresses about the things I cannot control. Cassie just lets it fall off of her, hardly a worry in the world. It seems I have a lot of learning to do. It seems I have a long way to go to find out who I am again. And it's hard deciding who I want to be. Wow, who DO I want to be?
Relaxing by her pool, drinking a rum and Coke was exactly how I wanted to start my first day, a Friday. The mid-afternoon August sun was kissing my skin, an easy 90-degree day with no humidity, the birds were chirping off in the distance, and my mind was finally clearing itself of the clutter of the past year. Right now I can just "be." When was the last time I could just "be"? After the divorce proceedings started I plunged myself into getting it done. That's me, always focused, always running toward the goal. I didn't date, certainly didn't have sex, didn't have time, didn't want to, didn't trust any guy, didn't...
Cassie came toward me with a big smile, wearing only a silk sarong and nothing underneath. Her amazing body - even at 40 - accented the fabric instead of the fabric accenting her. She had another rum and Coke for me, ice cold, which I gladly accepted. She took the chair next to me and asked, "How ya holdin' up there kid?" "I'm good,"I responded with a smile, "I'm just relaxing in the sun." I was faking it, and she could tell. Damn it, she can always tell.
"Shay, it's so good to have you here. And it's so good to see you smile, even though I know you're trying to smile, which is good. You let me know what you need and the answer is yes."
"And you, Cassie, are a Godsend,"I giggled, raising my glass to her. "What I wanted was another rum and Coke, and right as I thought it, here you came. You seem to anticipate all my needs." Cassie smiled and giggled too. We've been friends since grade school and know each other so well. We just accept each other and love each other as people and cherish the friendship we have. I can't seem to find a man that'll accept me and love me this way. With Cassie, everything is fun.
"Speaking of needs Shay, we're having a party tonight. Would you like to attend?" She shot me that Cheshire cat smile, knowing what my response would be. "Oh God,"I groaned as I rolled my eyes, "one of THOSE parties? Why would I want to attend?"
"Yes, one of THOSE parties,"Cassie mocked, "And I wanted to tell you so that you knew what is happening tonight. If you want to attend, then the invitation is there. If you don't, well then, I respect you and love you and at least you know what is going on. That way, you can plan accordingly."
"See, this is why I love you, Cassie,"I sat up, facing her, "You give me invitations, you don't give me ultimatums. You ask me if I'm interested, but never put any pressure on me to say yes. If you were a guy I'd do you in a second!!" We both got a laugh at that. "But you know that's not my thing. I wouldn't even know what to do in the state I'm in. I haven't even been on a date in God knows how long because Dave was about as romantic as a head cold. And I don't know how you and Ron can do that kind of thing and be happily married. I'm sorry to pass judgment, but...."
Cassie bent down a little to stroke my hair delicately and remove that little flitter of hair around my eyes. She smiled, tilted my chin up to meet her gorgeous blue eyes. "What I love about you most Shay, is that you're a questioner. You always want to know the answers. You are the yin to my yang. But sometimes you need to understand that Ron and I truly love each other and we're happy with who we are, what we do. We're ok sharing our bodies with others, but we only share our hearts with each other. I know this is tough for you to understand, especially right now, but we're happy with our lives. And perhaps, this is something you don't need to understand, just accept. I want you to come because I feel you could use some serious decompressing. I would never force you to do anything you didn't want to do or didn't feel comfortable with. I already know that you are still wondering what Dave is doing with the stripper he fucked and left you for. I know you're wondering how you're gonna pull this all together. But I'm here to tell you that Dave made his choice and went his own way. Your thoughts about him – to this day – are nothing more than wasted energy. And you're gonna pull all of this together. If you didn't think you could come here and start anew, then you wouldn't have come. You are so fraught with worry about everything, and that's totally normal. It's tough starting over at any age, let alone the big four-oh. But we love you, we believe in you, we know you're gonna be just fine."
A wide smile appeared on my face. Gotta love Cassie. She does call it like she sees it. And she's right. My mind is still wandering from place to place, never finding any rest. Through the divorce I wouldn't allow myself to feel it, to comprehend it. Even though I was dead-set on divorcing, believed everything I did was the best for me, and never allowed myself to mourn the proceedings. Now that they're over and done with I don't know what to do with myself. "I feel like I'm really vulnerable now. I don't know how to do what you do. And I can't be you." I started to cry a little bit. I turned my head away from her in shame, gulped down my rum and Coke. Two minutes ago I was smiling, now I'm tearing up. Yep, I'm a mess. Ugh, how am I gonna be OK with the big stuff when I can't even be OK with the little stuff?
Cassie let me have my moment, then put her delicate fingers under my chin, again lifting me to meet her eyes that were filled with warmth. "You know I'd never hurt you. You know I'd never make you do something you didn't want to do. I only invited you to get you out of your funk and to offer you a chance to have some fun. You've always had a great body and you are beautiful in any man's eyes. I thought perhaps some attention would be good for you. Not so much a 'fall off the horse get right back on' kinda thing, but give you a chance to start your own thing. You don't have to be me. I don't want you to be me. I want you to be you and be happy being you. I want you to love yourself as I love you. I know you're struggling. This is just an opportunity to set yourself free, be beautiful, enjoy some company, and not worry about the next day. Tomorrow is gonna come. But what about today? Live for today. I won't beg you or pressure you to go. And you don't have to give me an answer right now. It's a masquerade ball, so people are going to be dressed up, wearing masks. Right now I know you want to wear a mask at life, so there it is. The men are gorgeous. Trust me, I have excellent taste. It's not a slutty thing. It's fun and erotic. At least I see it that way. Nobody has to know your name, your background, anything. You tell me what your name is going to be tonight and I will tell Ron and we'll call you by that name. It's just sex, Shay. N.S.A. - No Strings Attached. You are safe, I promise you. And if you say no, I need you to know that is totally fine and I respect everything about your decision."
With that she gave me a reassuring kiss on the cheek, and started to walk away. That's Cassie, dig into your soul, let you know what's wrong, give you the pep talk from Hell, raise you up like you've never had, then walk away, leaving it all as your choice. Pure freedom.
"Fuck it, I'll go,"I said. Holy shit did I just say that? She looked back over her shoulder and smiled. "Ok then, pick a number between one and three." "Who are you now, Monty Hall?" I laughed, "Oh God we're old enough to know who Monty Hall is!!" I raised my glass and drained the rest of it. "Ok, you win; I'll take what's behind door number three. So now tell me what is behind door number three. Usually behind door number three is a goat. I don't want a goat."
"Excellent!!!" she clapped her hands. "Door number three is what costume I'm picking out for you. There's another part of door number three that will be a surprise."
She skipped, actually skipped, her way backed to me and snatched the empty glass from my hand. "How about a refill on that rum and Coke?" "Oh yes,"I said, "Definitely. And plenty more where that came from because it looks like I'm gonna need it. Cassie... what in the Hell have you gotten me into?" But she couldn't hear me; she was humming and dancing her way into the house. When she went inside she cranked up the tunes. Alanis Morrisette singing "You Oughta Know." It's a fitting song. Oh I certainly needed a girl-power song right about now.
"Gotta love Cassie," I said to myself as I leaned back and enjoyed the afternoon, my mind now off of my problems and on to the evening, something to focus on beyond my pity-party. Door number three... that was usually a goat or a Mercedes. Nothing in between... I don't want a goat and I don't need a Mercedes, though a Mercedes would be nice. What have I gotten myself into...? And yet, I have to admit, this might be just what I need. "Just let go, Shay, and have some fun," I reminded myself, closed my eyes, and thought of the fantasies I've had, never expecting them to come true. A tingle found its way into my button between my legs, and I simply enjoyed it and squeezed my legs tight over and over as I basked in the sun. I enjoyed it... now there's a change for the better; a tingle in my button. There's an even better start. My hand slid its way between my legs for just a moment, and then quickly moved away. A naughty smile spread across my face. I let my mind wander where to the most primal recesses of my mind. There I found something beautiful inside of me.
Maybe life does begin at 40...
- - - - And now for Chapter Two - - - - -
(You've been... Thunderstruck!!!)
It was almost time...
Cassie really did a number on me. She had me dressed in a silver sequin gown that barely covered my ass and boobs. She did my make-up because I was too nervous about getting it right. My earlier time in the sun gave me a bronze glow and some really rockin' tan lines. I decided to not go topless tanning because every man likes tan lines. See, she already has me thinking about what men want. Cassie did my lips full with an off red lipstick. Too much red looks slutty. Off red looks classy, she told me. My shoulder-length hair was pulled back, something I would never do. Cassie told me it accentuated my features. My 5'4" frame never got beyond a size 8, even at 40. Thank you, Lord... The black four-inch heels put me at 5'8" and made me feel a little clumsy (like wearing hockey skates), but also sensual. The dress she had me in made my breasts look huge. I used to be a B-cup. Dave wanted something more. So at 35 he paid for a D-sized boob job. Then he left me for a stripper with a bigger boob job. Thanks, Dave. Well... at least I got boobs that I was proud of. And the best part was that he paid for them!!! The mask was simple, sparkling silver sequins upon a glossy jet black base. It was a no-frills yet elegant mask, and it cost a fortune. In truth, I felt as beautiful and as I ever have. Maybe there was something to this.
"Cassie," I said as we finished up in the bathroom, "Can we please go have a cigarette? I need a pep talk to get me thru this. I don't know what to expect." "Of course sweetheart," she whispered in my ear. "I knew I was gonna have this talk with you. Let's go outside."
Out on the on the porch we both lit up. I took a deep drag from my cigarette and looked at her, my eyes wide with naughty anticipation and sheer dread. Cassie just smiled, making me blush. She could see my inhibitions starting to show, so she leaned in and gave me a big long hug. As she released me she simply said, "You look absolutely ravishing!" She puffed on her cigarette, thought about things for a quick second and said, "Shay, here's the scoop. You're not looking for love tonight. You're not looking to make all the right moves. You're not looking to say all the right things. You're not looking for a phone number or a night after tonight. Those are all of the things you're NOT looking for. So what ARE you looking for? Just have fun. Just enjoy the moment. Just enjoy your body. Just enjoy giving your body and accepting of a man's body in return. We're all here to have fun. Don't make more of it than what it is. All it is is a night of fun, to cut loose and fuck! There is no making love here. Making love is for someone you love and only someone you love. You don't love any of these men. They don't love you, important distinction. Everyone here is here to enjoy themselves and let things go where they're gonna go. At the end of the evening we say good-bye and we go our separate ways. If at any time you're not comfortable with anything, you're never required to do anything you're not willing to do. That's how we do this. And that's the only way we do this. This is my house and you are safe. You gonna be ok with all of this?"
"Is there a code word for 'no'"? I asked incredulously. "Yes, stupid." She giggled, "How about the word 'no'. We're all adults, Shay. The word 'no' means no. Everybody knows and respects the meaning of that word." I exhaled, laughing out loud. "Gotta love Cassie. You are such an amazing person. Thank you for being my friend. I owe you so much." "You don't owe me anything. I just want to see you happy. I love you like you're a part of me. We've seen each other thru good times and bad. You've been there for me and now I will be there for you. Can you trust me that you are safe? Every guy in there is a gentleman. Every guy in there will make you feel welcome. Every guy in there wants to have a special moment with you, to give you his body and to enjoy yours. There is nothing more to that. Just enjoy."
With that we both took a final drag off of our cigarettes, stubbed them out. I was as ready as I was ever gonna be. "By the way," Cassie gleamed in my direction, "With your red hair, green eyes, huge tits, and awesome body... trust me... you're gonna be popular!!! But I'm not taking you to meet the troops. You're not ready for that. I had something much more private and intimate in mind." That was exactly what I needed to hear. With that confidence, Cassie took me by the hand, leading me down the stairs, into the unknown.
"Ok guys, here she is," Cassie sounded like a carnival barker. "This is Shay, she is my bestest friend in the entire world. Mistreat her and I'll cut your nuts off! Treat her like a woman, show her a great time and you will forever be in my gratitude."
"Wait," I hesitated, pulling back on her hand and wanting to run away, "Why are there three guys?" Cassie shot me a wicked grin and beamed, "Well Shay, you did pick what's behind door number three. You do remember door number three?" I nodded, still in shock.
Cassie continued with her Cheshire grin, "Well, behind door number three are three guys. Hence door number three. There's Mark, Ben and James. I know these wonderful men, and hopefully you'll get to know them too."
Cassie walked around to the men; each one had only a towel around their waist, their own mask and a big grin for me. "Shay, if you decide that all you want is one, then pick one. But I know your desires from all the years of talks. Thirty plus years of talks. You've told me of your fantasies. So... here are your fantasies come true. Again," as she strolled back to me obviously proud of the predicament she put me in, "IF you only want one guy then pick one. The rest will come upstairs and join the fun going on up there. There is no jealousy or resentment, right fellas?" "Yes ma'am!!" they all agreed.