tagHumor & SatireSwift Branchbaum Gets Fucked Ch. 02

Swift Branchbaum Gets Fucked Ch. 02


She moved another step closer to Swift who was now sitting up in the bed.


She must be Mary Chambers, Swift thought. The front desk had called to say that she was on her way up. And she was moving towards him. Swift was going to try to stop her advance, but before he could get his hands out from under the blanket (where he had been busy pleasuring himself), she was right there. And the next thing Swift knew, she was sitting on his bed and was kicking off her shoes.

Swift was going to speak, but before he could get a word out, Mary was talking: "Swift, you're even sexier than your pictures." She pushed him back to a laying down position and threw one of her legs over where she figured his legs were. She moved her pelvis over his. She had raised her skirt above her waist.

Swift liked to keep things neat. He worried that her cunt juices would smear his bed's slipcover. His hands were trapped under the blanket. He couldn't move.

Swift had prepared a speech and a long sequence of moves preparatory to seducing this woman, but as he opened his mouth to speak, this woman thrust her tongue past his teeth and deep into his mouth. He had planned it all out: (1) He was going to pretend that a sudden weakness had caused him to lie down, (2) ask her so sit on the chair next to the bed, (3) accidentally touch her elbow when she moved, per his request, to straighten his pillow, (4) shyly apologize, pretend to be overcome by her kindness, (5)slowly pull her down to lie next to him, (6) silently explore her body, and, finally, (7) fuck her.

But all of that was impossible Her tongue was swirling around in his mouth. Her body was atop the blanket above his body trapping him, and....her hand was snaking under the cover and was heading for his penis. His penis that wasn't hard yet. He desperately tried to grab her hand before she could reach his knobby, underinflated shaft. Holding her hand at her wrist just inches from his pecker, Swift began to speak, "Hello, you must be Mary Chambers, I am so happy to meet you." His jowls were quivering. "Please sit on the chair," he said. "I do apologize for being in bed," he added. "Would you mind, straightening my pillow," he continued.

He had memorized his spiel and, flustered, not knowing what, in these circumstances, he should say or do, he, without thinking, uttered the words he had memorized earlier. The words seemed totally inappropriate now as Mary's hand, Swift's fingers vainly pulling at her wrist, reached its intended destination. She was holding on to Swift Branchbaum's penis. "Oh, Swift, Mr. Branchbaum, I can feel that you need a little help."


Shit, Mary hadn't thought that this would be the case. His cock was flaccid. "Dear Swift," she said. "Let me help you, please."

Mary lifted the sheet and moved her face to follow her hand until her mouth was next to Swift's purple knob. She opened her mouth and slowly sucked his cock in past her teeth. She ran her tongue down his shaft. With her other hand, Mary cupped his balls. She sucked in her cheeks to create a vacuum and tightened her lips against his shaft while his tongue swirled up and down and around the bulbous head of his tool. It was alive! Mary felt his cock awaken. The shaft was slowly hardening, extending.


Swift began to breath again. He had been holding his breath. Swift had been afraid. He had taken a double dose of Viagra and a triple dose of the sexual enhancement herbal supplements that he advertised on his program, but he had been afraid for a few seconds there that his cock wouldn't get hard. He was afraid that this woman would be another of those erectile dysfunction causing women like his wife. But, praise the lord, that was not the case. The Viagra, the supplements, and her tongue and mouth were doing their jobs.


Soon, Mary Chambers thought, soon he would be ready to fuck her. Soon, she thought, as she felt his cock getting more firm, she would be getting fucked by the Guru of Truth, getting he needy cunt slammed by the leader of the whole conservative movement, experience the bliss of receiving the gift of his cum in the soft, pink folds of her warm pussy. Mary tightened her forefinger and thumb around the base of Swift's cock and massaged it up and downwards while she poked her head out from under the sheet. Yes, his instrument of pleasure was surely growing each second. It was truly tumescent.

"Shall I get undressed?" she asked.

His 'hammer of vengeance' (as he liked to call it) was nice and hard now.

Mary kept up her massaging. Her left hand inched from his balls to his ass hole. Swift's penis reacted immediately, twitching itself into even more life. Mary thought he was nearly ready to fuck her. "I'm going to get undressed," she told him, "I'm wearing a bra. I know how you hate those femicoms who don't wear bras." His cock began to shrink.

Mary stopped speaking and returned her mouth to his instrument. She swirled with her tongue and vacuumed pressure to his prick by inhaling her cheeks. She massaged his shaft harder until he was once again tumescent. Mary breathed easier. She was going to get fucked by the mighty Swift Branchbaum.

Mary pulled the sheets off Swift. She sat up and took off her blouse and bra. Two kids, her tits sagged a bit, but her nipples were hard now and her tits looked pretty good, she thought. Mary lifted herself up over his now stiff cock. She lowered herself, her cunt, on to his prick and she uttered a series of low mewls of pleasure. She began to move herself up and down. She moved her hand to rub against her clit. Mary wanted to cum. She wanted the king of the radio talk show hosts to deliver her an orgasm. She wanted it. Oh, wouldn't it be something to tell AnnaLynn when next they got together for coffee. An orgasm delivered by Swift Branchbaum. Mary rocked her pudendum over Swift's groin. She bent over and pushed her clit against the fatty fold of his stomach. She wished that Swift would move his hips a bit to help her out. She wanted to cum. She needed to cum.


Swift Branchbaum looked up at Mary Chambers as she worked hard to get him an ejaculation. Oh he wanted to cum. He needed to cum. He wasn't able to move his hips enough to help himself to an orgasm. He tried to think of the pictures he had hidden away, of the last porn movie he had seen, of Annie Kholder, of, don't ever tell anyone, Farrah Baylin.

Swift needed Mary to work just a bit harder. He should have thought of it before, that her cunt had been too stretched by the birth of her twins. Truth to tell, he wasn't too happy about being on the bottom, below her pushing pelvis. Swift much preferred to be on top.

Swift reached up with his hands and rubbed her taut tit.


He wasn't large enough. Usually, her cunt was tight enough to grip a cock. Mary was working as hard as she could. She really needed to cum. She hated to think it about her idol, her guru of truth, the leader of the movement she thought was saving America. Right now he was rubbing the palm of his hand over her nipples. It was helping a little, but not enough. And, apparently, Swift wasn't too happy either. He seemed to be signaling that he wanted her to get off so that he could get on top. Maybe that would work, Mary thought. She grabbed hold of Swift's cock with one hand and continued to manipulate her clit with the other hand. She rolled off and pulled Swift atop her and slipped his cock between the lips of her cunt. He was heavier than she realized and now she was having trouble breathing. She hoped he would take some of the weight off her by extending his arms to lift his body. He continued to pump his inadequate prick into her cunt until, at last, his prick sputtered and spewed out a meager amount of ejaculate. He came.


Damn. He came. Swift Branchbaum had his climax and rolled off of her. He turned his body and looked away from Mary. Soon, Mary knew, he would be asleep and in a minute begin snoring. She pushed against her clit. She circled it with her finger. She put another finger against her puckered ass hole. Crap, nothing was working. No matter what, she would never have allowed her husband, the brain surgeon, to get himself off without first taking care of her. No fuckin' way. No fuckin' ever way!

Jeez....he was snoring. Mary sat up and looked over at Swift Branchbaum's little cock. It was all curled up and almost hidden under the folds of his tummy. She shook his shoulder, but he shrugged her off and began to snore even louder than before.

Mary got off the bed. She picked her clothes up off the floor. She looked over at Swift. Shit. He was laying on his stomach and his snoring was louder than ever.

Mary Chambers wasn't going to take this laying down (figuratively speaking). She was pissed. Luckily, she realized, she had come prepared. She dug into her handbag. Ah, her vibrator was there in its purse pocket. And, she had her two pair of plastic handcuffs. When it came to sex, Mary believed in taking care of herself, especially when it came to her orgasms.

She would take care of things! Yes she would! His snoring was even louder. Mary thought for a moment. Screw it! She affixed a handcuff to each of his wrists and attached those to the bed posts at the head of the bed. She did the same with his thick ankles, spreading them wide and attaching those cuffs to the posts at the end of the bed. She looked at her work. He was nicely spread wide and unable to move. What else? She knew! She ripped part of his pillow case and tied it around Swift Branchbaum's forehead, effectively blind folding him.

She stepped away and looked back at her one time idol and leader.

She went into the bathroom and got dressed. She got her cell phone out and called Stephan Korojek. When Stephan picked up, Mary told him that she needed for him to get over here to the hotel. She told him the room number and told him to hurry. She would pay for four tennis lessons. He said he would be there in 15 minutes. "Good," she answered. Mary pulled out her vibrator and started to take care of herself while she waited for Stephan.

Twenty minutes later, Mary heard a knock on the suite's door. It was Stephan. She let him in and brought him into the bedroom.

"I want you to fuck him in the ass," she told Stephan, pointing to Swift Branchbaum who was still laying on his stomach spread out, blindfolded, his snoring louder than ever.

"Who he?" Stephan asked, pointing at Swift.

"He Swift Branchbaum," Mary answered.

"You want me fuck him in asshole? I don't know I can do," he said.

"Five times your rate for a lesson," Mary said.

Stephan looked doubtful.

"He's the guy who told me to take golf lessons," Mary said. She added, "he's the guy said all those bad things about your tennis friend, Jenean Forest."

Stephan dropped his trousers.

On the bed, Mary could hear Branchbaum begin to mutter, "What's happening, hey what's going on?"

The End

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