TGI Chronicles Pt. 1 Ch. 08

"Oh Yes. I fully expect that he will try to get it back as part of a settlement. Fat chance. I have better plans for it."

"Tell me." I was intrigued.

"Well, I've found a video company, and I'm going to have a video properly made for Ken's entertainment. A director, two cameras, a cameraman and a sound man, proper editing, the works. And I've found Ken's favourite Bentley expert. He's a nice old fool, and very cheap to hire. So, I'll have a video of him bringing the car out of the garage, and going over it with a running commentary, singing its praises. Ken will be so proud. And then he can value it. I'm expecting somewhere between seventy-five and a hundred thousand. Then we'll have a little film of me, or you if you like, taking the expert back to the station in it, waving him off on the platform and all that. Then we'll take the car back to park it in the middle of the drive. And we'll have a big scene, of me pouring ten litres of strong paint-stripper all over it."

"Ughh!" was all I could say, thinking what damage that would do.

"And when that's finished bubbling away. We can have another big scene of me pouring twenty litres of petrol over it!"

"Oh, you wouldn't."

"Oh yes I would. With a close up of me striking the match. Think about it, Ken is facing poverty. And he sees me making a bonfire of one hundred thousand pounds, and its pride and joy car. I reckon it will reduce him to tears."

"I would think so!"

"Well we'll have some closing scenes of the truck coming to collect the wreck, taking it off and dropping it into a crusher. Did you know, you can hire the crusher in our local scrap yard for individual crushings? I haven't made my mind up yet as to whether I'll bother to send Ken the little cube of his crushed Bentley, just as a little keepsake."

She finished with a triumphant smile. I was stunned. Neither of us said anything for a while. The waiter came to clear the table and to bring our coffee.

Then I thought I had to mention the obvious fault in the plan, before she decided to do it for real. "Don't you think it would be rather a pity to destroy an important piece of motoring history, let alone so much money?"

"Well I can afford it, just this once, as a special treat. But, yes, destroying it is the bit I don't like. Personally, I don't give a damn about the car. But I guess it would be a bit naughty to deliberately destroy it. That's why I've come up with an alternative ending."

"Which is?" I asked, relieved.

"Well it will be a shorter film, but it will start exactly the same. The valuation and trip to the station and all that - the bits that Ken will like. But then it'll be me speaking straight to camera, and I've got to script it absolutely right, to lead him all the way up to the edge of the cliff before I push him over. It'll be about how the car is important. How I know it was Ken's pride and joy, but it is a remnant of a marriage that is over, and I've got to do something with it. Something where the car will be looked after, is in the hands of a safe and caring owner. So, maybe its time to make some reparation. All the sorts of phrases that will give him hope. Then I shall, on screen, transfer ownership to you, Tim."

I was struck dumb. Eventually, I managed "You can't."

Jean was smiling broadly. "Of course I can. It's my car and I can do what I like with it. And in my book, Ken took the most precious thing you had away from you, it's only fair that you get the most precious thing he had. I might use that phrase on film, it sums up the transaction rather nicely, I think, don't you?."

"No, you can't give me a hundred thousand pound car. And anyway, what would I want with a vintage Bentley. No! Jean. You can't. I'm sorry. It's a nice idea, but..."

"Oh yes I can. All I ask is that we have a contract that you will keep it for five years, long enough for Ken to give up hope. For those five years I'll pay for all servicing and insurance - I would've had to do that for Ken if we were together, so that's no skin off my nose." Again she smiled sweetly.

"But I don't want it. I wouldn't know what to do with it." I protested.

"Well, it's a simple choice. You can accept it. Or you can watch a bonfire. It's your choice, Tim."

She looked at me, and I knew she was serious.

"I guess you leave me no choice. Thank you."

"Cheer up. Enjoy it. It can add a certain panache to a day at the races or a country picnic. And it's not going to cost you a penny for the first five years."

"Well, all I can say is thank you."

"My pleasure. Eight years of living in doubt, with a dying marriage, I deserve a little revenge. And this is legal!" she was still smiling "I have to remember that, I'm a professional lawyer after all."

We sat in silence, looking at each other, Jean smiling triumphantly. But then I began to warm to her plans, I began to smile "Is there any chance I could do a piece to camera?"

"Yes, of course there is. What do you want to say?" she looked interested.

"Well I'd have to script it carefully, rather like you for your bit, but I was thinking along the lines of 'how I understand that the car truly belongs to him - Ken - but it won't matter if I use it for a while. It might be a bit of fun to use it in the afternoons, it'll probably be pleased that it's out being driven, nothing serious. It doesn't mean anything.' That sort of thing, plenty of innuendo."

"Oh, yes. I like it. Don't say anything you don't feel happy with, but along the lines of 'It'll be a good ride for the afternoon.' I know how Ken talks and thinks, I might even be able to find some phrases he's used about one of his women."

"I'm beginning to think this might be fun." I laughed, and leant across the table conspiratorially.

"I was going to have a scene of you just driving off into the sunset." Jean was inventing again "but how about that you drive a little carelessly, nothing serious, just enough to worry him. Or crash the gears..."

"And then I'll look to camera again, shrug my shoulders and say 'It's only a car, nothing important - like another man's wife!" I smiled across to Jean, who was laughing happily.

There was not a lot more to say after that. I asked when all of this was going to happen. Apparently not until after Ken had agreed to the divorce and the settlement. And, whatever the settlement was going to finally be, I was convinced that she would keep the Bentley out of it, and make sure that she never had to hand it over to Ken, just so as she could have her revenge on film.

As we parted, on the steps of the hotel, Jean turned to me, "The Bentley is not conditional on your relationship to Beth. But Tim, you're a nice guy. Please don't make my mistake. Don't think you can build a happy marriage with a cheater. She's done it once, she will probably do it again, and even if she doesn't, the marriage will die in that arid world of doubt and suspicion. My advice is to get rid of her and start again. It may seem hard, but I know, I've been there. Now, look after yourself and I'll be in touch."

We kissed and parted. I felt she was a bitter and unhappy woman, even if she was now taking her life into her own hands. I didn't want to end up like her. I must make the right decisions for my life, not let it drift into that 'arid world of doubt and suspicion' before it is too late.