The Awakening Ch. 11-20

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CalyPy
CalyPy
239 Followers

"My love, please wake up!"

Caliope gasped and opened her eyes, she found Amra naked next to her in the bed, she was also naked, but sweating and agitated by her dream.

"...that was just a dream... it was just a dream..."

"What were you dreaming?! You stopped breathing and scared me!"

"I stopped breathing?"

Amra sat next to her and brushed some sweaty hair out of her face, she squeezed his hand and took some deep breathes, only then realizing her heart was pounding very fast and her body was shaking.

"It is ok, you are safe now, I will never let anything bad happen to you, I promise..."

He hugged her and she simply snuggled in his arms, still shaken by that dream. It was just so real. Amra caressed her back and tenderly held her until her breath slowed down. Once she started to move again, and part herself from him to look around, he pulled his shirt from the ground and covered her gently. She smiled and leaned up to kiss his lips, and then someone knocked on the door. He moved next to her and put an arm around her protectively.

"Come in..."

The door opened and both Elaine and Pronab walked in. Caliope sat down straight and smiled nervously as she realized she was naked from her waist down, she pulled Amra's shirt lower to cover the best it could be as Pronab nervously turned his gaze from her to Elaine.

"I figured you were going to be hungry a bit, how are you feeling my dear?"

She had a plate with some fruits and a glass of juice, walked towards her but stopped right before she reached them. Caliope looked at her confused, and then noticed Elaine staring at her, as if she was waiting for permission.

"Thank you Elaine, I am feeling so much better, and I did not realize how thirsty I was until I saw the glass you brought."

She smiled, and Elaine replied with a nervous smile. She gave Caliope the drink and the plate then turned to head out of the room when Amra finally broke his silence.

"You really came here with him just to give her something to drink and eat?"

Elaine sighed and Pronab frowned, she turned around and faced him.

"She is changing, you are changing, and this whole situation is changing, nothing planned, on either of both sides, a new and different war is taking shape and all I should be thinking about is what should we do, but all I can really think of is her safety..."

Caliope smiled, a bit blushed, as she tasted some peach. She then offered some fruit to Amra who kindly refused.

"Thank you Elaine, and Pronab, you both have been like the family I never had... I am truly better, I had a nightmare when I was sleeping, Amra got worried and woke me up, but it was just a bad dream... nothing else... can you all three relax now?"

Pronab smirked and winked at Caliope, she chuckled and smiled. Elaine laughed and Amra leaned to kiss her forehead with a smile.

"It would be good to take a day or two to visit some places, and then move to our next destination... this trip has already started slow."

"I would love to visit some vineyards, perhaps a hidden beach for some sun?"

"Ok, we can start with a dinner out, I will leave the choice of place to you both, the experts in the field." Amra admitted.

Elaine clapped and smiled "Wonderful!"

Amra stood up and walked around the room searching for something. Caliope swallowed hard as she watched him naked wandering in the room, but then noticed how both Pronab and Elaine acted normal as if nothing strange was happening. She blushed and tried to hide her embarrassment focusing on Elaine, although she could not stop peeking every now and then at him.

"Let's go to the Villa Aphrodite, last time we were there food was exquisite, and the owner is one of your friends Pronab."

"I will make a call and see that a table gets booked for us tonight."

"Oh it would be so wonderful if we can make it to see the sunrise! I am going to enjoy that so much!"

"I am sure we could make it happen with our very own time machine here."

It was the first time Pronab made a joke about Amra, and Caliope laughed aloud. Amra turned around to watch her. It was such a simple joke, so pure and innocent, she couldn't help but laugh. Pronab smiled as he looked at her as well, and Amra dropped the clothes he had picked over the edge of the bed as he got next to her and offered her his hand to get up.

"It would be nice if you take a refreshing shower my love, then we can head there and enjoy the night."

Caliope nodded and stood up, smiling. Elaine perked a brow as she saw her and quickly mentioned what caught her attention.

"You do need some more food, you are looking very pale, we will have to remember your human half needs to be fed... we shall wait for you two outside."

As they both headed out of the room, Caliope felt a chill run thru her; Elaine's words made her remember her dream again. She was pale, indeed she was, and so much alike that figure of herself in the dream.

While they both stepped out of the car, a path of candles guided them to the secluded inside garden of the Villa. Several tables were placed without a particular order, but the waiter was leading them to another area. People were sitting in comfortable leather or velvet sofas, candles were the only choice for lightning all around the place. Each table had a personal waiter, and you could tell they were mostly high society people, with shiny jewels and fancy outfits. When they entered the third room, a huge angel statue made into a fountain greeted them, behind the statue, a balcony that lead them to a special round table for five. The waiter bowed to a person that was sitting on the table, and he smiled as he stood up and greeted them.

Pronab broke the ice approaching him "That angel statue was a nice addition, Giuseppe."

"Pron! My friend! Such a pleasure to enjoy your presence at my humble home! And you bring friends this time!"

He had an Italian accent, and he was tall and handsome as well. Amra had his eyes focused on the round table as Elaine smiled and greeted him.

"Elaine... mia bella Donna... you are here? Are we that close to the end?"

Elaine chuckled and shook her head, then smiled as she pointed at Amra.

"Times have changed, Giuseppe... we have nothing to fear... please meet Amrafel."

His sparkling eyes shadowed, and he gasped as finally Amra looked at him. Both nodded and then silence took over. Pronab pointed out the order of chairs, locating Amra and Caliope together, with Elaine at her side and himself on Amra's side. After the waiter took the order from Giuseppe, who was recommending the Villa's specialty as an appetizer, they were left alone in the private room. Giuseppe was nervous, but Elaine continued to be in her good cheering mood.

"If he is here, things are very serious..."

"They are, but we are truly here to enjoy the night, to have some relaxation, and not to talk about anything work related, I am sure you are the right person to cheer our evening."

Even though he smirked, it was clear that the presence of Amra made him change his mind about whatever he was thinking before. Pronab leaned on his comfortable chair then welcomed the waiter as he poured them drinks.

This Villa has changed, it is bigger, yet darker, why is that?"

"My clients are not always coming with their legal partners, which is why the candlelight is preferred. Intimate yet bright enough to glare at the other person with you."

"I find it beautiful Giuseppe, it looks so romantic..."

He smiled again at Elaine and took her hand to kiss it gently; Elaine blushed and giggled then turned her head at Caliope. Only then Giuseppe realized her presence. He perked a brow then tried to focus his attention to the place where she was.

"I take it that there is some one sitting next to you my bella Elaine, is she Amrafel's Asteria?"

"You can't see her? She is Caliope, and yes, she is Amrafel's Asteria."

He stood up from his chair and walked slowly towards Caliope, who became nervous. Amra put his arm around her and stared at Giuseppe in a threatening way. Pronab stood up as well but remained still at his place, next to Amra.

Elaine asked alarmed "Giuseppe, please explain what is going on..."

"It feels so strange to use my powers again... but I see her as something else... she is not human..."

Pronab added "her father was a dark Angel, but she is on our side..."

"...is she?"

"I advise you to return to your seat and stop this act, now." Amra warned.

"Angelo vendicatore... I am not your enemy... and I know she isn't either... fine, I will sit... but I don't like to be told what to do at my home..."

"I am sorry Giuseppe, this might not have been such a good idea."

"It is all ok my friend..."

"I am tired of people pretending all is ok, please tell me what is that you see in me that made you react this way... I want to know... I need to know." Caliope pleaded.

Giuseppe looked at Amra, then at Pronab, and finally to Elaine, realizing none of them objected to Caliope's request, he rubbed his chin and pondered for a few minutes in silence, once the appetizer was served, he dismissed the waiter and finally spoke.

"I have one of the most difficult to handle gifts among the Angels in this Earth... I see lost souls, ghouls, phantoms in despair, and dark apparitions every place around, but I had learned my way to ignore them... I don't know why but I see you in two different ways at the same time... I see you as a pale creature, long hair, white as snow... white ghostly eyes... you are wearing a long white dress, covered in blood... you have wings, tainted wings... and a crown, a bloody crown, entangled with thin trims of your long and pale hair... I blink and you are a beautiful lovely girl, full of color and life, snuggled in the arms of our powerful saviour... my apologizes if at first I did not greet you, I thought you were one more of those lost souls I try to avoid always... but you aren't."

Caliope was breathing fast and shaken by the words of Giuseppe, he described the image of herself in her dreams with such details, adding even more than those she barely remembered. Elained shook her head and sighed.

"She is the daughter of the great fallen one on the last war, how she got to us was absolutely not planned, yet she did, and they both found each other. What we have found out is that not even them know exactly her role in this, they can't harm her but I don't know why either... they are afraid of her but also hate her... who understands them? She has some powers, but we are waiting for her to recover from some incidents before we even try to test which exactly those are..."

"She is at our side, you are perhaps looking her other half, but she is not going to betray us Giuseppe..."

"My power allows me to see the true nature in people, humans, and angels, everything... but of course, her blood is tainted, this might be why I see this both persons in her at the same time."

"Can you see more? Can you see her powers?"

Amra interrupted "if you can see something on her that might help us, please speak now, if not, then stop, she is brave but she will live her life haunted by what could be or might be without certainty."

"Amra, he is not against us, he does not mean harm... Caliope, my dear, you understand this, don't you?"

"What he says has more meanings than what you all think, and this is what scares me..."

Amra turned his head to look at her as Pronab and Elaine did the same. She looked up at Amra and whispered in his mind ""what he described is what I dreamed when you woke me up... exactly like that... in such detail that I did not even noticed until now...""

"Care to explain dear?"

"I dreamt about the girl you describe Giuseppe, that exact person... in my dream she was me... she was walking under a path of darkness, with hands reaching up searching for help... she was happy watching it... or I thought she was, I can't remember well... Amra woke me up when he said I stopped breathing... and a few minutes later you and Pronab walked in the room. Is that me? Am I her?"

Elaine reached to caress Caliope's face and then grabbed her hand, squeezing it softly "you know now about your true origins, and she might be what you could turn into if you decide to go to that side..."

"I don't want to be her... I want to be me, I don't want to change..."

"We all change, especially in times like this, in times of war... and you will change one way or the other... difference is you know both options and you have found what most of us only dream to have... you found your true love... And I know he won't allow you to become something you don't want to be..."

"My love, you are safe..."

Caliope nodded, her slight smile gave Amra comfort again. Giuseppe made a gesture and called the waiter who took everyone's order. After that, nothing else was said about Angels and war. They joked and had fun, talking about old experiences and funny stories. When the morning was approaching, Giuseppe led them to a special balcony that gave a wonderful view of the sea, his Villa being one of the most perfectly located in Oia. The sun started to rise and Caliope could see as silence took over, people walked in pairs or threes to the several balconies and waited in silence. And when the sun rose, it was like magic. A light that grew and took over slowly, an ocean that was dark and lifeless now was brimming with colors and life. Amra squeezed her hand as he was enchanted by the sight. She smiled and gave in to the spectacular display happening in front of them. The birds singing with joy, Elaine smiling as Giuseppe held her in his arms, Pronab smiling and watching calmly. And Amra, he was touched, perhaps as much as she was. The sight of Oia's sunrise needed no words of explanation.

When they returned to their home, it was simple and easy for Caliope to lay in bed and fall asleep. Amra covered her gently and then rested next to her as well.

On their final day, as they were packing again for the next part of their trip, Giuseppe arrived to escort them to the airport, he brought a bouquet of white roses for Elaine who seemed delighted by his attentions, and gave Caliope another bouquet filled with different kinds of colorful flowers. She smiled at the gift and gave him a hug, which took him by surprise.

Once at the airport, they were escorted to the VIP area where Giuseppe said goodbye, leaving an open invitation for all of them to return whenever they wanted.

When the stewardess started to give the usual instructions, Caliope leaned against Amra and whispered "Where are we going next? I forgot to ask". Amra turned his head and kissed her on the forehead with a soft smile.

"We are heading to a very unusual country, not like this first stop... there are not many tourist people there... we are going to Famagusta, Cyprus."

CalyPy
CalyPy
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AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
More edits for you

Chapter 11, page 1 corrections:

"I told you not to call me like that...” This should be "I told you not to call me that!”

The ellipse (. . .) does not take the place of a period (.) Use the ellipse only when a sentence is truly interrupted and unfinished. Also, you have use the ellipse in cases where the correct punctuation should be the mdash (—).

"Did I slept much?” should be "Did I sleep much?”

"asked me how were the investigations going," should be "asked me how the investigations were going"

"I did not thought it well then" should be "I did not think it well then"

NOTE: I see a pattern of using the past tense form of the verb following “did.” It should be the present tense form.

prevent something bad is set loose should be prevent something bad from being set loose

"We need to start making some actions, after the last attempt on their side, there has been rumors spreading and we need to show a united front.” should be "We need to start taking some action; after the last attempt on their side, there have been bad rumors spreading and we need to show a united front."

"her loved one made her bow to help me" should be "her loved one made her vow to help me” Note: the rest of this paragraph needs appropriate mdashes and periods.

"By Friday, Amra was aware of the people they would met, only 5 key destinations and no more, the 5 main generals would meet and review Elaine's last orders to be given on Sunday." should be "By Friday, Amra was aware of the people and the 5 main generals they would meet, the

5 key destinations they would visit, and had reviewed Elaine’s last orders which would be given on Sunday.”

THIS IS NOT ALL; I DID NOT CORRECT THE REALLY MINOR ERRORS.

CalyPyCalyPyover 8 years agoAuthor
Thank you all

I really apreciate your comments.

@Gemini yes, english is not my native language. I hope you read the following chapters and saw some improvement. I worked with a wonderful editor on some but he just got too much work after and we could not continue.

The story is in my head tho, so I will keep writting.

Gemini1766Gemini1766over 8 years ago
A Good Story

The idea is a good one. In general terms it is well done. In more specific terms, it needs a bit of work to fix grammatical errors. Your writing style leaves me believing that English is not your first language. You get words out of order in English that would be fine in other languages. You use words that are not correct for what you mean to say. You really need a good editor who can work with you and understand and communicate with you and help you to get it out properly.

Dialog is much better in this form. It is how it is supposed to be written in a story.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Dialogue

I'll start by saying I like the story line. Good potential, but does need some work. The dialogue is stilted, in both forms. The first entry you wrte it like a transcript, as a police interview or trial would be written. This gives very little if any context or emotion to the writing. The current submission shows some improvement but misses much of the reasons for a change in style. It is not just a matter of throwing quotes around each sentence. It would be an improvement if you added says, exclaims, mutters, groans out when describing your dialogue. What would really bring your dialogue to life would be more descriptive language. Some example would be: whispers passionately (when characters are inimate but not wanting to be heard), exclaims in suprise (when an angel tells yet another shocking tidbit), says timidly (as she blushes and replies to something shyly but not knowing how it will be received).

The point of this is that it has the potential to add depth to your dialogue and add life to your characters interactions. You've had comments that your first effort was much like a play and it was, just without the actors bringing it to life. That is why you should change your style.

WillowRequiemWillowRequiemabout 9 years ago
Awesome!

I agree with the previous person, you could detail more and make it a bit longer, but that is just the greedy side of me, I love the story so far and next destination is really getting me exited! love that place! spooky and mysterious! I want to know what will they find!

In regards to how it was written, to me both ways seemed fine, I was comfortable in both styles, this one tho has like a bit more detail, I can tell you are experimenting on your own way with it, doing a great job! but my advice? write how you feel more comfortable, only that way you will deliver us the best you are capable of ;)

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