The Bonding Chronicles Ch. 15

"I'll be fine, SD. You stay here and get some sleep, while I have a little chat with mommy dearest."

Through the haze that surrounded him, Andrew tried to decide if her statement had been playful or annoyed, and after a moment's consideration he knew it had been both. Sara was still frustrated — her emotions made that clear — but at the same time, she was working hard to temper her own nature. As sleep began to take hold, Andrew realized just how well Sara was doing, and the last thought that crossed his mind while darkness fell around him, was to wonder if perhaps that control had been yet another way he had influenced her.

Sara kissed her man's cheek, savoring the sight of his peaceful face as she watched him drift off.

She opened the door with a sigh, every instinct begging her to close the door and start the car, to just drive away and curl up in bed with Andrew and Karen. The realization she had come to earlier that night had been difficult and profound, the pain of it still lingering in her heart, and the changes that would result were still forming. She knew all of that, and as she stood there, scanning the light that filtered out through the windows from the living room, she knew she had to face her fear.

What good was all that pain, if she just returned to the person she had been? How could she face Andrew or Karen, knowing that she had just run from yet another difficult moment, rather than face the reality that stood before her?

"Not again," she thought to herself as she closed the car door and marched the short distance to the house.

The green light on the keypad beside the door told her it was unlocked, and Sara was not surprised that her mother knew that she was there. After taking a deep breath, she opened the door and entered her old house, kicked off her shoes and placed them in her usual spot. Some habits, she realized, were just too difficult to break.

When she entered the living room, she was surprised by what she saw. Her mother was curled up in a large blanket, her laptop off to one side and a large container of ice cream clutched in her hands. There were pink and red stains all around her lips, and a trail of milky cream running down the sides of her mouth. The signs of intense crying were well-established in the older woman's face.

"Don't judge me," the woman pleaded around a spoonful of the sweet treat, the scent of cherry and fudge just then finding their way to Sara, who recognized her mother's favorite comfort food.

For a moment she considered fighting her smile, not wanting to give her mother the satisfaction of knowing that she cared, but in the end she allowed it to come through.

Without a word Sara walked to the kitchen, her speed and grace not going unnoticed by her mother, who watched her from the comfort of the soft and plush couch. In the briefest moment Sara returned, lifting the edge of the blanket and sliding in beside her mother. It was warm and familiar, bringing back memories of youth.

While Sara leaned over, resting her head on her mother's shoulder, she reached out and deftly took a spoonful of Cherry Garcia, savoring its sweetness while both women struggled with where to begin.

"I..." her mother tried to start, but her voice choked up and she instead reached up and caressed the side of Sara's face, noticing for the first time the smoothness that had replaced the acne scars that her daughter had built over the years.

It was still difficult for Vivienne to accept what Andrew had shown her, and even if she had found a way to explain what the amazing young man had accomplished, she could never explain the changes she was beginning to notice within her daughter.

Sara had always been surefooted and naturally athletic, but her movements, which had been graceful since youth, seemed almost poetic now that she was with Andrew. She was reminded of a ballerina every time she watched Sara walk, the ease and fluidity of her movements difficult to describe, but almost impossible to ignore.

She had avoided Sara's gaze, not wanting to see the anger and disappointment in the young woman's eyes, but if she had, any doubts would have been dispelled in that instant.

"I should have talked to you when you got older."

Sara clenched her jaw, realizing how difficult it was going to be to keep her temper in check.

"Yeah, that would've been nice."

They stopped talking long enough for each of them to take another spoonful of ice cream. While they sucked on the frozen dessert, the cold sweetness blanketing their senses, they both thought back on the arguments that had resulted in them living apart.

Vivienne felt like she had tried to talk with Sara, and was beginning to feel frustrated as she remembered how difficult it had been to get Sara to understand what she had been trying to say. One argument came to the front of her mind.

"I can't explain it to you, mom!" Sara had yelled during one of their heated debates. "I saw the jerk trip that kid and I couldn't just stand there."

She remembered the pride she had in how her daughter had stood up for the smaller boy, but that pride was short-lived when she remembered the extreme bruises and cracked ribs that Sara had given the boy's attacker.

"You could have killed him, Sara!" Vivienne had yelled, knowing where the conversation would go, knowing where the conversation always went.

"Nah," Sara said dismissively, "I barely pushed him."

She had thought that Sara had been lying, trying to downplay what she had done to try and get out of trouble. "Tell me what really happened, Sara?"

"Awww, mom... I swear, I just pushed him. It ain't my fault he hit that pole. Dumb, clumsy boy."

There was still derision in Sara's voice. Despite the fact that she had just entered puberty, there were still no signs of change in her opinion of most boys. Zack, Bruce, and Steve remained the only boys she seemed to respect, and the rest were just obstacles she chose to ignore, when she was not either protecting them or scaring them, as the situation demanded.

The argument continued for several more minutes, each of them getting louder as Vivienne tried to force Sara into confessing to what she had done. She figured her daughter had kicked the boy in the side, or hit him with a bat. There was no way that falling against a pole would have caused the damage that the principal had shown her, or so she thought at the time.

Once Sara returned from her father's, the excuse became much more bizarre, the heat of the moment causing Sara to blame it on her werecat heritage. She had worried about sending Sara off to her ex, but after everything that had been happening at home, she hoped that Alexander would be able to reach her.

Sara reminded her of Alexander in so many ways, and she now understood why, but at the time she had just wanted Sara to be in an environment where she could thrive. If Alexander, who seemed to be just as wild as Sara, could channel her energy and help her direct her urges, then she had to try. Or at least, that was how she had comforted herself that she was doing the right thing, sending her daughter off to live with a complete stranger.

The seconds dragged on while Vivienne remembered the story, and Sara continued her previous thoughts. She was trying to figure out what she should have done during those key moments in her life, when she had chose to run instead of face the difficult emotions that were before her.

Vivienne laughed, pulling Sara from her introspection and causing the lean woman to pull back and look at her mother.

"What a pair we make," the older woman confessed, grinning at the truth of how stubborn they were. "You certainly are my daugher," she concluded with a definitive chuckle, which was joined by Sara who shook her head.

"So, what are we supp-" Vivienne began, but was cut short the moment she turned her gaze and locked eyes with Sara, her pools of amber trapping the woman's attention, and threatening to drown her beneath a sea of surprise.

"You still weren't sure that werecats were real, were you?" Sara asked, her smile looking wonderful on her pristine face.

"No..." Vivienne stated as she took in the impossible color of Sara's eyes.

Sara spared only a moment to consider whether she should close the door on her mother's uncertainty, and grinned while she decided she should. The older woman almost dropped the carton of ice cream as she pulled back, shock written across her face as she watched Sara's irises morph into almond slits that looked nothing like a human's, and everything like a cat's.

The stunned woman studied her eyes for several seconds, moving in close as the shock wore off, until eventually she was forced to shake her head and give a nervous laugh.

"How the hell could I have known?" her mother asked, her troubled thoughts swarming through her mind while she glanced around the room, trying to find something else to focus on.

Sara was not sure how to answer the question. The moment her father had told her what he was, and what he had hoped she would become, she knew the truth of it immediately. Of course, for her that had been different. She felt it deep within herself, and from that moment forward she never questioned her nature, or what she was. For Vivienne, it was not so simple.

Unlike most children, she recognized the reality that surrounded her, and what few things she had not figured out, Karen helped her to recognize. It was amazing to Sara how Karen had appeared in her life at the moment when she was needed most. Her urges were starting to get the best of her, and despite her efforts, she was losing the battle with herself.

Sara shook her head, realizing she had allowed herself to get sidetracked.

"So, what do we do now?" Vivienne asked.

Sara returned her eyes to human, the colors of the room returning to what she considered normal.

"I'm not sure," Sara confessed. "We can't ignore this, and I know I'm not ready to hash out everything..." Her voice trailed off as she watched the expectant look on her mother's face. For some reason, Sara could tell that her mother was hoping she had forgiven her.

"Yeah, it's going to take some serious work for us to get past everything you've done." Her mother dropped her head and nodded, her sad look reminding Sara of what she must look like when she didn't get her way.

"Well, I don't know what I can do to repair this, sweetie," Vivienne began. "I'm not sure how I conv..." whatever statement the older woman was about to make was cut short as Vivienne reconsidered her words.

"Yeah, I hate it when one of my developers makes lame excuses, and I'm better than that." The thought of work brought a fire to Vivienne, and the confidence that swelled within her was evident in her posture.

"I updated the master script here, and it should have already removed the spybot from your phone. I trust Andrew can remove his copy."

The look on Sara's face showed that while the gesture was not enough, she did value the effort her mother had made.

"If you have any questions, I want to do whatever I can to regain your trust." Vivienne took a deep breath, before she continued. "No matter how difficult, I want to try and be honest and upfront from now on."

Sara nodded while she considered her mother's words, and something she had heard when she had visited her father came back to her.

"Are you sure? Andrew told me about what happened with you and dad, and I think this question will be difficult for you."

No matter how much animosity Sara still held for her mother, she couldn't bring herself to hurt her.

Vivienne studied Sara, fear and curiosity fighting for supremacy while she tried to think of what Sara could ask that would hurt her. After a few seconds, she nodded her head and smiled, the false confidence in her voice wavering as she spoke.

"If it might help to bridge this gap between us, I will take the risk."

What she did not say, was that in a way she felt like she deserved the pain, after what she had put her daughter through.

"Anita told me that you had talked with Xander for weeks before deciding to send me to them as a kid, and that you knew what they were. That you suspected I was like them, and knew if I was, that I wouldn't be happy here."

Vivienne's mouth went dry as she was forced to think of the woman who had pulled Alexander from her. Sara was right to have warned her, and for a moment, she regretted having given her consent to the question, but as she thought about what Sara had asked, she realized how distant that pain now seemed.

The fear of losing her daughter dwarfed all other concerns, and as she tried to make sense of Anita's statement, she realized how differently she viewed Alexander and his family. She had only discovered the truth of his nature a couple of hours ago, and somehow that short time had been enough to reshape her perspective.

"Well, I don't know what Alexander said to her, or how he got that impression, but as usual our conversations grew heated pretty fast, so it's difficult for me to remember exactly what was said."

She paused and took another spoonful of ice cream, the cold numbing her tongue and teasing her taste buds, while the cherry flavor somehow helped her remember those past events. Vivienne didn't want to lose her daughter, and could never shake the idea of Alexander swooping in and somehow meaning more to Sara than she did. It was petty, she knew that, but it was a worry she couldn't escape.

In some unknown way their conversations always seemed to come back to Alexander's betrayal, and how Vivienne did not want to risk her daughter being broken by him, like she had been. In the end, she remembered Alexander's words, which had given her hope that despite all other concerns, perhaps he could give their daughter what the young girl needed.

"The wild, indomitable side of our daughter is my legacy, coming out. Those same things which make her difficult to control will also make her amazing when she is older, if she can find a way to harness them. I grew up with those same urges, and know how she feels.

"Our history is carried in that amazing little girl, and all the love we shared is given life in her. I will never be able to be the father that I had wanted to be, that time has passed, but I can at least try and help her deal with her nature. Our bloo... We are special, Vivienne, and in this time, she needs the guidance only I can give."

She had almost destroyed her relationship with her daughter by that point, not knowing how to reach the stubborn girl, or how to stop her from making the impetuous decisions that constantly got her in trouble. Everything she tried failed to help Sara, and what Alexander said gave her hope.

"Mom!"

Sara's voice cut through Vivienne's ice cream induced reverie, and as the older woman blinked away the tears from her eyes, she cast a solemn look at Sara and stated, "Sending you to your father was the hardest decision of my life, and it was only through your father's poetic words that I even considered it.

"In truth, I never really said much when he told me why you needed to be with him, he just explained how similar you were, and how those parts of your personality that I struggled with so much were the very parts he could help you understand. When he said that, I remembered how aloof and wild he was, and thought that he was right."

Vivienne dropped her spoon in the carton and reached out, taking Sara's hand.

"I don't know why your father thought I accepted that..." She stopped and smiled, shaking her head as if the words she was about to say were too crazy to be believed, "that he was... a werecat. Perhaps things between us would have been better if I had."

Her voice had grown mournful, and Sara could see the look of longing in her mother's face, a past that never was, and a future that could never be, playing out behind her mother's eyes.

Sara had never really considered that part of herself, but as she watched her mother dreaming of mistakes past, she realized that was not something she ever did. Self-reflection was not part of her character, which was why that realization stood out to Sara, who for the first time understood one of the main differences between her mother and herself.

Vivienne noticed Sara's eyes darting from side to side as her daughter considered how many things she had learned that night.

"Sara, could I ask something?"

It was strange for Sara to hear such uncertainty in her mother's voice. The woman had always been confident and brave, never backing down and always rising to the challenges that were before her, but as she saw the worry in her mother's eyes, she knew that the woman was still afraid of losing her.

The sad thing was — and Sara hated to admit it — that Vivienne was right to worry. Sara, for all the growth she had made, was still struggling to let go of the pain she had felt and the acts her mother had performed. In lieu of responding, Sara simply nodded, her eyes cold and suspicious.

"How did you..." Vivienne tried to start, but ended in a sigh as she realized she had no idea how to ask her question. "You weren't like this the last time I saw you. How did you change?"

Sara flushed as she remembered how Andrew had started her transformation, and idly rubbed her belly as she thought of Karen back home, resting off her own fresh beginning.

She knew she could not tell her mother the truth, but at the same time she didn't want to lie. That put her in a difficult position, and for a few seconds she sat there, scanning the room as she tried to think of what to say.

"Andrew... Well, he found a way, and completed the transformation yesterday."

There was so much more to the story that Vivienne could feel resting behind that simple statement, and while her mind boggled at the implications of what Andrew had done, she knew she should not ask questions. Not about that, at least.

"Have you considered how you're going to return to school?"

It was a simple question, and one Sara had not given any thought to. As she considered it, she realized how pressing that concern should be. Her mind raced for a moment before a smile spread across her face.

"I think Andrew's already working on a solution."

Vivienne's follow-up question was written in her wide-eyed stare as the older woman flared her arms out, everything in her posture and expression screaming, "Well, what is it?"

"He said something last night about reaching out to his 'Contact Guy', whoever that is. As far as the rest, I have no idea. But if I know my man, he's got it covered."

Her mother seemed to accept what Sara said with a little too much ease, which caused Sara to narrow her gaze and spit out, "What do you know, mother?"

Vivienne chuckled and shook her head, pride in her daughter showing in her expression. Sara had always been observant, and like her mother, never liked to be deceived. Vivienne blanched as she hit that realization, and instead of talking she pointed towards a manila envelope that rested on the end table beside the couch.

Sara had just reached over and lifted the large cache of documents when Vivienne's voice declared, "You might want to look at that with Andrew. It is, after all, about him."

Sara slid out from under the blankets, realizing she needed to leave.

"Thank you, mom," was all she could say.

Sara took a deep breath while she contemplated what she should do. There were more questions, but as she felt the weight of the documents in her hand, she could feel her hurt and frustration building back up, and knew that she needed to leave while she still had her emotions under control. For all the splendor that Andrew's gift had been, there were aspects that made her worry. Her moods and compulsions were always the most difficult part of being half-Therian, and ever since her ascension, she felt them pressing upon her with great and unrelenting force.