The Bridge Over Wilson's Creek

This time, it was Beth's attention that wandered. "I've wanted to kiss you for a long time."

"You have?"

Beth took two breaths before she brought her full focus back to me. "You know Eloise Hatcher?"

The idea that the youngest Hatcher sister might engage in something squalid was no surprise, after all she did wear those fake silks stockings and high skirts, the new ones with the hem at the knees. But that Beth might have kissed her first, the thought forced my lips into a hard line. "Yes?"

"And Gladys Pierce?"

My eyes widened at the very thought. "The reverend's daughter?!"

"Yes," my friend affirmed. "I saw them kissing once, last summer."

"Not Gladys!"

Beth nodded. "Yes. Once."

"What else did you see?"

Beth shook her head. "Nothing. It seemed like the most wicked thing. I turned and ran. But then, when I was walking home, thinking of you, and what I wanted to do with you, that's when I knew it weren't wicked at all."

I shook my head. "I know it's not wicked."

My friend sighed, then looked around again before turning her attention to me. "Then why are we here, where no one can see us?"

I swallowed, then licked my lips. "Because they don't know how beautiful it is?"

"Yeah." Beth nodded. "That must be it."

I could barely make out those last few words; her lips weren't moving much, except towards mine. Our mouths met, chasing away any notion that our feelings could be other than divine.

We hugged as we kissed. I felt a pressure, a weight. Understanding my friend was leaning, urging me downward, I relented. We dropped, still in our embrace, to kneel upon the pine needles. My eyes must have closed sometime on the way down. The focus of my very being was the moving of my mouth over hers, until I felt her fingers on the buttons of my dress.

With a gasp, I pulled away, steering my suddenly open eyes to hers. "What are you doing?"

"We'ze gonna do more than kiss."

"Like what?"

Beth shrugged. "I don't know, but we've seen the animals enough, we can figure it out."

"Animals?" I swallowed, recalling the occasions when I had seen critters mating. "But neither of us has a, uh, you know."

Beth's mouth flew wide in a huge fake smile. "You mean you don't got one?"

I smirked. "You know what I mean."

She leaned closer. "Yes. But do you know what I mean?"

I shook my head. "No."

"You've touched yourself, where a boy would, right?"

My head vibrated in another brisk shake before I gained control of my duplicity. "Ok," I admitted. "Maybe a little, when I bathe."

"Only when you bathe?" Beth pressed.

"Ok, a few other times too."

My friend leaned, urging my body backward. I relented at once. My back found the forest floor. Her mouth found mine. This time my eyes stayed wide; her lips were not the only parts of her exploring my body.

The hands that had sought to unbutton my dress slithered from beneath me and made their way along my flank. My own hands found the sides of Beth's arm, but they just rested there, shaking, while her fingers moved lower, onto my legs, down to my calves, then up again, under my dress.

My mouth fell open. I gasped twice in rapid succession, ending our kiss.

Beth withdrew her face. "You alright?"

Though I nodded, my friend had not awaited a reply. The tips of her four joined fingers made their way up the bloomers that covered my thighs. I felt a whimper resonate within my throat.

Beth's mouth rushed to mine, our lips meeting for the moment before her fingers found my sex. The next instant my loins clenched beneath the unfamiliar and unpleasant assault. I shook my mouth free. My friend's fingers stopped at once. She withdrew her head to look down at me.

"Slower," I said. "And not so hard."

Beth nodded, then tilted her head. "Like this?" Her fingers moved again. Slower. Gentler.

"Yes," I said, pausing for a swallow. "Like that."

For a minute, maybe two, her fingers roamed in vague circles, caressing me through my underclothes. Only when I began to push back, did she increase the pressure.

I allowed my head fall to the forest floor. Closing my eyes, I sent my consciousness to where my friend's hand massaged my essence. My fingers curled into her dress, pulling her body to mine. Her lips found my neck, but I barely felt her kisses. My tongue moved across the lips of my open mouth, mimicking the motion of my lover's fingers over my other lips.

A sensation began to build, intoxicating in its promise, but all too soon maddening in its elusiveness. My chest heaved with my mounting excitement, my body moving in ways I didn't understand, feeling things I had never imagined. At some point, my spine arched in a manner that would normally have been painful. Ragged breaths passed over first my quivering tongue, then between my still-parted lips.

Time passed, though I've no idea how much, yet my urgency found no outlet. My body shuddered. I whimpered. Tears emerged from my eyes. The shaking fingers of my hands sprang open, releasing the fabric of my friend's clothes. "What's happening?" I muttered, turning my wide eyes toward the pine boughs high above us.

Beth moved her face over mine. "You were almost there."

"Where?"

My friend shook her head. "I ain't sure, heaven maybe. Who knows? But it's wonderful."

"I want to go there," I declared in a broken whisper.

"You will," Beth assured. "I didn't make it my first few times either."

"You didn't?"

"No. You got to relax and let it happen. Don't try and control it."

"Relax?" I queried. "How could I relax with you doing that?"

"You can," she insisted. "You almost did. Smell how close you were."

Before I could respond, her joined fingers found the tip of my nose. I flinched away, but recovered to return, taking a deep breath, sampling my own scent.

Bathing but once per week, I was accustomed to my body's odors. Some of those were on my friend's fingers, but there was something else too, a pungent musky tang. I found my chest swelling as I tried to take the scent deeper.

"Nice, huh?" Beth inquired with a grin.

"Strong," I said. My eyes went to her fingers, then back to her face. "Do you smell the same?

Beth nodded. "Close."

"Can I do you?"

"You could, but I've done myself plenty before."

"You have?" I knew it was a foolish question even before I had finished uttering it.

Beth shrugged. "Yeah. But I always thought of you when I did."

I could not have stopped the smile that spread across my face had I wanted to. "I still want to smell you."

"You will," she assured me, "but I want to try something else just now."

"What?"

"You've seen how dogs do it?"

I kinked my head, dropping my brow. "Yes?"

"You know, with their butts together?"

"Our butts?" I gasped. "Together?"

Beth smiled. "Well, not exactly our butts." With that, she pulled her dress to her hips and rotated her body. Her splayed legs split mine. At last grasping what she had in mind, I held my breath while she scooted between my thighs. With my eyes wide, I watched her sidle closer. And closer.

"Pull your dress up," she demanded.

My hands rushed to comply even while my mouth asked a question to which I already knew the answer. "What are we going to do?"

Beth grinned. Her head shook a little, I think she must have giggled. "This." She pulled my right leg upward, forcing my hip to an angle that allowed her left leg to slide beneath my butt.

"Pull my leg," she instructed.

My eyes dropped to where her angled knee rested against my hand. Looking back to my friend, I moved my fingers into the crook formed by her calf and thigh. At the same moment, she wrapped her forearm about the trunk of my upper leg. With a nod, I pulled. She tugged.

Our bodies slid together, our sexes first touching, then rubbing against one another through the fabric of our underclothes. My eyelids fluttered. My head sought to fall, but I forced my focus again to my friend's face.

She stopped wiggling against me. Only her fingers moved, massaging their way from my thigh to the lowermost portion of my buttock.

"What do we do?" I asked.

Beth smiled. "Do whatever feels good."

Wearing a full smile, I allowed my head to fall onto the forest floor. That was too easy. It all felt good.

* * *

With the sun teasing the tops of the trees, we made our way home along the edge of the road. Though we normally strolled shoulder-to-shoulder, this time we had a full arm's length between us lest, I think, anyone see us and imagine we might be too close. As if to further that appearance that we had shared nothing, we shared nary a word before we got to the end of the Monroe's drive.

There we stopped, looking at each other, the dirt of the road, the grass, the mailbox, the sky, and, finally, each other again.

"I guess I better go," I said. "Momma's already going to be cross with me not being home to help start dinner."

Beth nodded. "Mine too."

My eyes fell. I swallowed, bringing them up again. "Can you still smell me? From there, I mean."

She shook her head. "I think we washed enough of it off so no one will know. Besides, we'ze only wearing these underclothes one more day."

"Tomorrow," I muttered tonguing my lips. "We can see each other tomorrow?"

Beth flashed a full-toothed smile. "First one that's done with chores comes to the other's place?"

"Deal!" I exclaimed with a nod.

"Deal!" Beth agreed. Not waiting for another word, she turned and sprinted for her house.

I made my way home at a somewhat leisurely pace, thinking of Beth, and tomorrow, and not much else. Silly me.

"Vicki!" My mother bellowed the instant I could see her lips. "Where have you been at? The men folk'll be in from the fields in an hour. Go fetch me another log for the stove."

* * *

To first my chagrin, and then my horror, I spent the bulk of Saturday on the tedious tasks of daily life. This was nothing unusual; it was common practice to do as much as possible so that the Sabbath might truly be a day of leisure. I had lived this way for eighteen plus years, but never before had it seemed so abominable.

Momma and I were in the middle of preparing dinner when Beth appeared at our door, unbeknownst to me. My heart all but froze within my chest when I glanced to see my mother and my friend conversing through the screen. I had to look twice to be sure it was really her. A few sentences later, Mother held the screen wide, inviting Beth inside. At once, my heart beat again.

"Your momma says I can help you with dinner," my friend announced.

My fists clenched, then shuddered, the only external sign of the excitement building within me. "Will you be staying then, to eat with us?"

Beth nodded. "I expect so. Something sure smells good."

I glanced to the stove. "Oh. It's the bacon grease Momma adds to the beans. They've been cooking all day. She says..."

Beth craned her neck to where I could see her lips move again. "I ain't talking about dinner."

My jaw fell. A second later, my head snapped every direction, confirming we were alone in the tiny kitchen. "Beth!" I gasped, looking back to my friend. "Can you really smell, you know, me?"

Her eyes wandered a moment before her lips curled upward. "No. But I sure want to. And that ain't all."

"Not all?" I queried.

My friend's lips moved as they did in school, when she was mouthing the words, rather than speaking them. "You've seen Daisy lick her coochie, ain't you?"

My mind flew to the Monroe's bitch hound. I nodded.

Beth tongued her lips. "Ain't you ever wondered what that would be like?"

My mouth fell open, my initial impulse being to deny my own wickedness. A moment later I found my head bobbing the truth my lips would not admit.

"It's ok," Beth whispered. "I've wondered too. Do you suppose it feels like this?" With that, she parted her lips, and drew her tongue along the length of the upper one.

My loins clenching their want, I emulated her gesture, imagining her tongue on my lips, and not the lips of my face. "Better," I said. "It might even feel better."

"There's just one way to find out."

My mind flew back, to my scent from our prior tryst, my most puissant scent. Smelling it was one thing, but tasting it? My nose wrinkled as I considered the prospect. "I don't know that's such a good idea."

"Applesauce," Beth snapped. "Where's another knife?"

I kinked my head. "What?"

Beth glanced down at the pile of potatoes in front of me. "I am supposed to help you with dinner, ain't I?"

This she did, though I had a hard time keeping my mind on the task, especially with my friend rubbing her form against mine at every opportunity. My spirits were soaring an hour later when we sat down to eat. I imagined what might happen after dinner, even if we could but steal a kiss.

It had conveniently slipped my mind that I was not the only one in my family with a fancy for Beth. Although all of my brothers ogled her in the manner of young men, George was the one truly smitten with her. I grinned watching my brother's exaggerated expressions and gestures, and the way he talked all too much and too loud, making something of a clown of himself in the way only a boy in love can. I grinned that is, until he displayed more courage than I imagined this particular boy in love to have.

"So, Beth, any chance I could see you tomorrow after church? Maybe we could..."

"No!" I insisted. Every face at the table turned to me. I gulped. My brain raced, trying to imagine something we might do together that George could not easily invite himself to. "We're, uh, going swimming, Beth and I." My eyes roamed for a second before settling on my friend. "Right?"

"Yes," she began. "We'ze gonna..."

I lost the remainder of the sentence as Beth turned to George. My eyes followed hers to his face, a selfish grin breaking upon my countenance as a sulk seized his.

My inappropriate glee lasted another quarter-hour until my brother's pluck once again surfaced while the women folk cleared the table. I didn't even know what was said until I turned back from the wash basins to find Beth two paces distant, staring at me.

"George asked to walk me home," she announced with a most solemn expression. "And your father insisted. He thinks it's a little late for young ladies to be out by themselves."

Without replying, I snapped my eyes to the window and the tiny bit of daylight that remained, recalling how many times Beth and I had been out long after sunset. I knew exactly what my father was really thinking, and it was dark indeed, though it had nothing to do with the retreat of the sun. It was my turn to sulk.

* * *

"Today, I should like to discuss the sanctity of the institution of marriage, the solemn union of a man, and a woman."

I cringed, and settled a bit in my seat. Like any effective speaker, Reverend Pierce had a way of making me imagine that he spoke only to me. He went on about the holy institution, and my shoulders shrank with my spirit, inch by inch. In retrospect, I suspect he gave that same sermon every spring, but that day it seemed particularly pointed, particularly odious. I wanted so much to steal a glimpse at Beth to gauge her reaction, but, sitting in the front pew where I might see the preacher's words, I dared not turn.

It was not until after the service that I found my friend in the mingling throng outside the chapel.

"What did you think of the sermon?" I inquired, a common question in the post-discourse socializing, but in this case a serious one as well.

Beth shrugged. "I don't know what the big deal is about hooch anyway. Ain't never tried none and don't plan to. My dad though, he thinks prohibition is one of the worst..."

"No," I said, leaning toward her. "Not that little bit at the end about temperance. The part about marriage?"

My friend's eyes wandered for a second before returning to me. "What about it?"

I stole a glance about, then took a step toward the open field, away from the horde. "I never thought much about getting married before, you know?"

Beth fell into step beside me, her face still toward mine. Her head shuddered in the slightest of shakes. "No. I don't."

"You've never thought of getting married then?"

"Of course I have. Marriage is serious."

I swallowed, the motion in my throat mimicking my spirit. "Boys then. You think about boys?"

"Are you jealous?"

That last word was like an arrow straight to my conscience, stopping me dead in my tracks. Turning toward Beth, I cast a glance back toward the chapel to be certain no one was within earshot. I laughed at my foolishness, not knowing for sure how far earshot was.

"Can anyone hear us?" I asked, returning my face to my friend.

Beth shook her head. "Not if you don't yell."

My eyes fell to my chest. I watched my bosom twice expand and contract within the yellow of my bodice before I looked back to my friend. "I might be jealous," I admitted. "I don't know, it's just, well, I've never felt like this before."

Beth smiled. "I feel the same way about you. And you don't need to worry about me and boys just because I walked home with your brother."

"We're still going swimming then?" I inquired. "After all, we don't have any chores."

My friend's chest shuddered with a chuckle. "We had church. Same thing."

My jaw fell. "Beth!"

She shrugged. "You'ze the one that wanted to see each other on the Sabbath. And I know you didn't mean see, did you?"

"You're right," I admitted with a nod. "I don't want to just see you. I want to smell you. And more."

Beth cut her eyes back to the congregation, then back to me. "You will." With that, she pulled from her pocket a crumpled flower.

My eyes bounced to the slender white petals and the large, round yellow center. "A daisy," I noted, looking back to my friend.

"Yes," she said. "Daisy. You washed for church last night, right?"

I nodded. "Yes."

Beth grinned, then licked her upper lip. "I hope you didn't wash all the flavor away."

I inhaled a large breath as she extended her hand and the modest flower toward me. Accepting it, I nodded my understanding, and my agreement. "Same place?"

My friend nodded in reply. "Same place."

* * *

With my heart racing my feet, I arrived at the pines mid-afternoon, expecting to rush headlong into the arms of my beloved. But she was not there. Consoling myself that one of us had to get there first, and that it just happened to be me; I waited, my eyes trained on the path by which I expected her to arrive.

The minutes ticked by. I began to feel more alone than I could ever recall. With a swallow, I glanced about, wondering what sounds were in the forest that I would never hear; unwittingly reminding myself that Beth would not be my ears, or anything else, for much longer.

A melancholy gripped me. I wandered from the flat rise to the bank of the creek, idly tossing twigs into the current and watching them float away, feeling in my gut that the moments of my life were slipping away in much the same manner.

My thoughts went to the future that was my downstream, a college in a distant city, away from everything I had known. I felt so small, so alone. So scared. A tear crept from the inner corner of my eye and slid along my nose. I wanted Beth more than ever, not just as a lover, but as my best friend.

As if some genie had granted my wish, I felt fingers upon my shoulder. My head snapped to the hand. With a smile breaking across my face, I turned my gaze upward to hers.

"Sorry I kept you waiting," Beth offered. "Dad wanted to sit around and talk about the sermon, especially how he disagrees with the reverend, you know."

Nodding my understanding, I rose, expecting an embrace, just a hug. Instead, I received a firm shove. My eyes flew wide. My mouth gaped. My arms spun circles in the air. In a motion that seemed to mimic the lethargy of the twigs floating downstream, I fell backward into the creek.