The Cabin Ch. 11

"Aubrey, I left because it's what both of us needed. A year ago, I wasn't a whole person. I had no experiences of my own, no history besides the storiesyou'd written for me." Leather brushed my hips. "I've gone on to live my own life. We are different now. Separate in every possible way."

I found myself standing between his outstretched knees, having unconsciously drifted towards him. He held my hips, skating his thumbs across my pelvic bones. I tried not to imagine all the salacious acts he'd performed with countless other women over the last year—things he could've been doing with me. At the same time, I had to admit that I was curious. I weaved a trembling hand amongst his loose curls.

"The person I was, the person you created, could not have stayed. You know that, don't you? I needed to leave to become kind of person who is capable of being with you. I am different, Aubrey. And so are you." Adrian touched his forehead to the smooth patch of skin below my breasts and clasped his fingers at the small of my back. "Our time apart has made you into someone I am so unreservedly proud of and it has also changed me. I have missed you, Aubrey. I didn't know what it was to miss someone. For three-hundred sixty-five days, I have loved and missed you—"

"You don't think I've missed you?" I bristled. "That I haven't hated myself a little more every day for missing and loving you after what you did to me?"

He tilted his face upward. "I'm sure you have."

"So, what? You want a pat on the back for properly identifying a feeling? Well, congratulations, Pinocchio. You're a real fucking boy."

Adrian brought his knees to rest against my outer legs. "I am sorry that I hurt you. I am sorry that our time apart has been difficult for you. But you cannot deny that you've made incredible progress while left to your own devices."

"Well, I kind of had to."

"Yes, you did."

My heart leapt into my throat. Losing Adrian had almost killed me and the resulting wound continued to ache long after the cuts and bruises had mended. However, the physical loss was a paper cut compared to the loss of us and everything I presumed I was fighting so hard to win. Still, as loath as I was to admit it, this man knew me. Maybe not the braver, stronger, more confident me, but the soft, vulnerable parts he'd once called home were still there, underpinning every single decisive act. He was calling on those places for forgiveness and, in spite of my resentment, they were answering

Adrian wrapped his arms about my hips and pressed the side of his face to my abdomen. I closed my eyes; my resolve dwindling.

"Are you really here?" I whispered.

"Yes." He kissed my stomach. "I'm here."

I weaved both hands into his hair.

"Did you touch yourself in the bath?"

My clitoris pulsed. "Yes."

"Did you think of us?"

"You have no right to ask me that."

"But you did."

"Yes." Blood rushed north and south. Just being in his presence again made me feel small, supple, and instinctively submissive. I bowed my head and let the tears drop into his hair. Adrian held me tight as he brushed his lips over my belly and bra. My cunt ached for him as it had every day for the past twelve months. He bit my nipple through the black lace. I winced.

"You have no idea how much I've missed you," he said.

The hell I didn't. Suddenly, I wanted to hurt him, to scream in his face and demand the truth because I refused to believe anything that fell so easily from that clever tongue. There had to be another reason for his return. He was a sadist, after all.

I shoved him backward onto the mattress and climbed on, straddling his hips. Adrian growled, his palms gripping my thighs. He hardened beneath me as he surveyed my form. I reared back and slapped the arousal from his face, forcing his head to the side. My palm burned, but so did my rage. Adrian stretched his jawand smiled playfully, his cheek reddening.

He snickered. "I'm tempted to say, 'violence is never the answer,' but we both know that isn't true."

I moved to hit him again. Adrian grasped both wrists and flipped me onto my back, pinning me. I screeched between clenched teeth and fought to dislodge my hands. "Fuck you," I spat. "Fuck you, you lying piece of shit."

I writhed and jerked beneath him, but he was strong and solid. Tears leaked down into my hairline. I hated him. I hated him for leaving and I hated him even more for having the audacity to return uninvited and unannounced. Adrian dropped his forehead to my shoulder, his breath washing over my chest.

"I hate you," I said.

"I love you."

I cringed. "You lied to me."

"I never lied to you."

"Bullshit."

Adrian kissed my neck. I flailed and wound up wrapping my legs around him instinctively, clutching his hips. An undeniable hunger roared deep within my belly. In spite of everything, I still craved him, worshipped him, loved him—

"No." I squealed and bucked, but my pelvis remained firmly anchored to the bed. I sobbed into the crook of his neck. Adrian loosened his grip on my wrists to run his gloved fingers up and down my forearms. My cunt tightened, prompted by the sleekness of the leather against my skin, which reminded me of Landon, who never ceased to call to mind the man on top of me.

"I never vowed to stay," he said. "I only told you not to worry about it."

"Withholding information is just a lazier form of lying."

Adrian shook his head. "I wish I could arrange a meeting between the person you are now and the person you were a year ago. You're stronger, Aubrey. You must see that."

"It's not that I don't feel stronger or braver or more accomplished."

"Then what is it?"

"It's that I don't trust you."

Adrian winced as though I'd struck him again.

"When you left, I felt your absence like a fucking hole in my heart. I thought I'd always carry that emptiness, but the higher I reached and the more boundaries I pushed, the fuller I felt. You're right, I've achieved more personally and professionally in these last twelve months than I have over the course of my entire life. I just don't see why you had to leave in order for that to happen."

Adrian cupped my face. "Do you think it was easy for me to leave you?"

I shrugged.

"Oh, Aubrey." He kissed my cheek and jaw. "Leaving you was the hardest thing I've ever done, seconded only by staying away for so long. But you are the person you've become precisely because I've stayed away. If I hadn't, you would've continued to live vicariously through me, relying on me to tell you what you should want. I couldn't justify stunting your emotional growth for my own selfishness." He brought his lips to mine and I yielded to him, allowing his tongue free rein. I squeezed his hips with my thighs, acutely aware of the erection straining his jeans. Adrian glided his palm over my hip and along the back of my leg.

He broke our kiss, panting heavily. "It kills me to think that you've spent this entire year believing I never loved you."

"Well, you left me. What was I supposed to think?"

"I thought it would all make sense after the initial shock wore off." Adrian sighed. "I was wrong to assume I knew you better than you know yourself. I'm sorry."

"So, why come back now?" I bit my lips together.

Adrian nuzzled my neck. "Because you're ready. You've gone through the process of filtering out what you do and don't want in a partner. I'm no longer your default option. We are free to choose one another based on desire and compatibility. Or not. What matters most is that whatever decision we make, it'll be a sound one." Adrian's smile was humble, akin to someone whose pride had been shaken somewhat by the stark realities of life, and yet there was a weightlessness to him that hadn't been there that previous winter.

He kissed my pulse point. "I've made my choice."

I grasped Adrian's shoulders, throwing all of my weight against him and pushing him onto his back. I clutched his wrists and straddled his pelvis, pinning him to the mattress as he'd pinned me, the only difference being that he could toss me off at any moment. He refrained. I ground myself against him, dragging my cunt along his confined length. Adrian groaned, tilting his pelvis upward. Memories from the previous winter flooded my mind. I needed him inside me, to prove that he was real, and to remind us both that even though he was no longer a corporal part of me, I could still claim a piece of him.

Releasing his wrists, I reached for his belt buckle. Adrian watched my frenzied fingers as they unclasped and unzipped his jeans, slipping into the waistband of his boxers to grasp his cock. He gasped as I encircled him, guiding him out into the open. His cock pulsed, hot and solid, between my palms.

God, I've missed this, I thought.

Easing the crotch of my panties aside, I rubbed the head of his cock along my folds twice before impaling myself upon him. We moaned in unison. His hands flew to my hips as I rocked my pelvis, milking him. He pulled my chest flush against his, kissing my cheek and neck before capturing my lips. I whimpered into his mouth as he groped my ass, thrusting into me from below. Though I was on top, he had reclaimed control, holding my pelvis in placeas he thrashed upward.

Tears leaked down my face toward our joined mouths. Adrian licked them from my cheek as I clung to his shoulders. The frightened, distrustful portions of me longed to believe that my arousal stemmed solely from a place of anger and that the sex we were having was a result of the pent-up aggression that'd been building over the past twelve months, but the rest of me wouldn't have it. My hands, limbs, mouth, and cunt all rose to meet his corresponding parts, welcoming him home.

Adrian sank his teeth into the flesh at the base of my neck. I cried out, trapped in that delicious mingling of pleasure and pain. I tightened my inner muscles around him. Adrian moaned, drawing his cock out most of the way and then shoving it back inside. I seized his bottom lip between my teeth and ran my tongue across it. He grasped a fistful of my hair and rolled us so that he was once again on top.

"I want you to touch yourself." He tucked his thighs beneath mine, tipping my pelvis upward. I licked my fingers and brought them to my clitoris. Adrian continued to fuck me as I masturbated, though the pace of his thrusts slowed as he watched me. I squeezed my left breast through the soft lace, toying with the nipple.

He clasped my throat, the warm leather embedding the dog collar into the skin of my neck. Our eyes met and I rubbed myself harder. In that exquisite moment, I was his again, and would've done anything to remain there.

The culmination of Adrian's measured thrusts alongside my own ministrations was too much to take. I cried out as my orgasm pulsed through me, fast and heated, my muscles flexing around his cock and coaxing his climax. Adrian leaned forward and drew a line along my jaw with his tongue before crushing his lips to mine. His thrusts became urgent, almost violent. He shoved his cock deep, practically roaring as he emptied himself into my cunt. I bit his neck, seizing a hunk of flesh between my teeth and gripping it, as though doing so might somehow prevent him from leaving again.

We held each other until his cock softened and slipped out of me. He released my throat and I relinquished the bit of skin I'd claimed, admiring the resulting bite mark as though it were a brand: I made this man; he is mine. Adrian rolled onto his side, but kept his arm draped over me. He caressed my stomach, tracing languid shapes across my skin.

With the rage fucked out of me, all that remained was the quiet resignation that forgiveness was and always had been the only option. Not just for him, but for myself. I pushed myself into a seated position, allowing Adrian's hand to drop into my lap.

"So," I said, "what exactly have you been up to all year?"

"It's a little early for bedtime stories, don't you think?"

"But we're in bed and I'm curious."

He smiled. "Go fetch my bag. It's by the door."

I raised an eyebrow.

"You'll be glad you did."

Sighing, I padded across the room, my thighs slick with our combined juices. Adrian's bag was bulkier than I remembered and hefty. I heaved the strap onto my shoulder and lumbered back toward the bed.

"What the hell do you have in here?"

"Tools. Supplies. Presents."

"Presents for whom?"

"For you, love."

I dumped the bag onto the mattress and climbed on. "You know I can't be bought with trinkets, right?"

"I wouldn't dream of trying to buy you, darling." He rifled through the overstuffed sack and pulled out a thin black box, which he handed to me. "Open it."

I eyed him warily as I lifted the lid. My breath caught in my chest. Inside the box was a wine-colored collar, made of leather and decorated with what I deduced were platinum or white gold studs. It wasn't flashy or excessive, but it was beautiful.

"I know how much admired Sonya's jeweled collar," he said, "but this seemed more your style."

I stared at it for a few moments, speechless.

"Adrian," I finally said, "did it ever occur to you that I might say no?"

He swallowed. "It did."

I lifted the collar from its box and examined it. "If I accept this, what will it mean?"

"It means that you agree to be my submissive."

"You mean a 24/7, Dom/sub arrangement?"

He nodded.

"What about Landon?"

"He knows it's a possibility."

"And what if I still want to play with him?" I wiggled my brows.

Adrian smirked. "You know I'm not the jealous type. Besides, I think I might enjoy watching Landon Top you from time to time." My clitoris throbbed at the thought of putting on a show for him. He tucked his cock back inside his jeans and maneuvered rose to sit beside me. "However, I should inform you that Landon's schedule is about to become rather full, seeing as how he'll be stepping up as one of the premiere Doms at a highly prestigious, up-and-coming BDSM academy."

"He will?"

"Yes. As soon as I settle on a location. And a name."

"You're opening your own academy?" I gaped at him.

"That's the plan. I've grown tired of making house calls. Better to let the eager masses flock to me. And since I can't exactly turn to Isabel for assistance..."

"Adrian, I'm just a writer."

"A writer who once dreamt of a place where people could feel free to express their deviant selves without shame or judgment. Besides, I would've thought that sort of environment would provide limitless inspiration for an erotica writer. Not to mention credibility."

He had a point. "But what would I even do there?"

"Whatever you wanted. Live, write, train, torment, fuck. You'd be my personal submissive and administrative counterpart, with all the rights and privileges afforded to such a position."

"So, I'd be a switch?"

"Every boarding school needs a firm-but-fair Headmistress. You can take on as much or as little responsibility as you'd like, as long as it doesn't get in the way of your writing." He ran three fingers over my mound. "And, like Isabel, you'd have the option of adopting a devoted pet of your very own. I know how much you enjoyed Ari's company."

Adrian stroked my folds through the lace. He continued, "Once I've chosen a location, the first order of business will be to replicate the Enclave down to the last fleur de lis ceiling tile." He pressed his thumb to my clitoris. "The second will be to fuck you there."

I moaned softly. He kissed the edge of my mouth.

"So," he said, "what'll it be, Mistress Aubrey?"

"Uh." I licked my lips, distracted by his skilled fingers. "I..."

Adrian withdrew his hand from my cunt and cupped my chin.

"Tell me what you want, love."

My chest seized. I gazed down at the collar, contemplating its true weight. A year ago, I would've leapt at the opportunity to be his full-time submissive, though I'd resisted the notion when it was presented by other Doms. Was I averse to the idea entirely, or just when it came to anyone who wasn't Adrian?

I laid the collar back in its box and handed it to him. He raised an eyebrow, his expression softening. The man looked almost breakable. In the end, I was proud of myself for not instantly accepting his offer. I liked this new, humble Adrian, with his wide, imploring eyes and nervous smile. Of course, it wouldn't last.

I turned my back to him and gathered my hair into an improvised bun. "Put it on."

His sigh was audible.

Adrian unclipped the dog collar and withdrew it, nipping the base of my neck. In its place, he settled the strip of leather. There was no stifling my smile as he fastened it into place. Pulling me back against him, he nuzzled my throat, planting kisses on and below my jaw.

"I have one last gift for you tonight," he whispered, his lips brushing my ear.

"You're going to spoil me."

He pinched my nipple through the lace. "And if that's my wish, what are you going to do about it?"

"Graciously accept, of course." I winced.

"Good girl. Now, on your knees."

I climbed down from the bed and knelt onto the hardwood, spine erect, hands clasped behind my neck. My fingers grazed the new collar and I fought to suppress the fresh tears that ebbed at my eyelids. I was Adrian's submissive again and all was right in my kinky corner of the world. He reached into his bag and pulled out something long and thin, but slipped it behind his back before I could get an adequate look.

"Close your eyes, love."

I obeyed, my skin prickling with goose bumps as he sauntered up behind me. Something swept across the small of my back—a rectangular strip of something. Leather? A whimper fell from my lips.

"Stand up."

I rose to my feet.

"Bend over with your palms on the bed."

I bent at the waist and arched my back, raising my ass high.

Adrian tugged my panties down to my knees. I purred as he dragged the leather tongue up the back of my leg and over my rump before nestling it between my thighs. I held my breath.

"Do you know what this is?"

"A riding crop?"

"Yes. Your riding crop, to be precise."

I beamed. "Thank you, Adrian."

"I had it designed to look exactly like the one Isabel brought to the cabin that night." He patted the keeper against my folds. "Does it evoke a similar sense of fear and arousal?"

"Yes, Adrian." I shivered.

My cunt tightened as I waited for him to deliver the first blow. He laid a hand upon the small of my back. "You know what to do, love."

The keeper hissed through the air.

Whap.

I savored the sting.

"One."



[Author's Note: Ten months and over 87,000 words later, and here we are. I'd like to thank everyone who has patiently awaited each installment since the story's debut back in April, 2014, as well as anyone who's chanced upon it since then. This is my first novel-length story and I can't even begin to list the lessons I've learned along the way, but I can honestly say that I am not the same writer I was a year ago. Your comments and messages have played an integral part in this process and I am so grateful for each and every one of my readers. Writing this story has been a pleasure for me, and I hope, a pleasure for you, too. Please feel VERY free to share your thoughts and feelings re: the ending or any other aspect of the story. Thank you for reading. —Woe]