The Case of the Missing Genitals

I pushed forward, remembering the route through the wandering corridor. Gladys clutched my hand, whether for guidance or security I couldn't tell. Soon, we made our way to Mama Darkness' schambers. Mama Darkness was there, of course, waiting for us.

The chamber was littered in shelves and tables. Each of those was crammed with books, vials, powders, and more. Dolls with pins pierced through them lay limp on shelves. Stuffed animals hung from strings nailed into the ceiling like hanged men at gallows. The smell of incense wafted through the air, cloying in the small space. In the center, free of the clutter, was a round table, with a bowl of clear liquid in the center. Three chairs surrounded the table. Two were empty. The last held Mama Darkness, in all her splendor.

"Dominick." She said simply. In that one word, she hid a paragraph of subtext. Her brown eyes stared at me from a face dark as mahogany. Her hair was wrapped in numerous colorful scarves, winding upwards like a beehive. A moss-green shawl was draped over her smooth shoulders, trailing down her plump body. She pursed her dark lips together as she looked me and Gladys over. One long fingernail, painted the color of spilled blood, tapped on the table rhythmically. Large earrings jangled together as she cocked her head to one side. "Sit." We sat.

"You come to me because of magic, yes?" Her accent gave away her New Orleans hometown, the words smoothly rolling together in a play of tongue and throat. She peered at us, leaning forward so her low cut dress revealed generous amounts of brown cleavage. "You both reek of the stuff." Glady's glanced at me in confusion. Both? She mouthed. I shook my head. Not now. Mama Darkness sat back, swirling the bowl of liquid before her with a long finger. Despite her smooth skin and generous body, Mama Darkness's eyes belonged on someone far older. They carried a weight that pinned me to my seat when she glanced my way.

"To discover the truth of the situation," She said, voice resonating oddly in the small room. I felt lightheaded, dizzy. Beside me, Gladys too was staring vacantly, unfocused as a junkie on her first high. Mama held out both hands, palms up. "I need blood. Divination comes at cost."

Gladys looked at me, fearful. If I hadn't gone through a similar thing on previous cases, I'd have been right there with her, scared and confused. As it was, I rolled up my right sleeve casually, and lay it in her palm. After another moment's hesitation, Gladys did the same. Mama grinned at us both, revealing white rows of teeth, stark in the gloom of the room. Her fingers curled around our wrists and punctured them. I grit my teeth but held myself from flinching.

Mama Darkness released us, nails dripping with our blood. She spattered it into the bowl, coloring the liquid a rosy pink. Plunging both hands in, she swirled and swirled, until the liquid was bright red. Too red. Red as rose petals. Red as fire. Red as passion. I felt a heaviness, drawing me towards that bowl. In the dim room, it seemed to glow with its own light. The edges of my vision started fading to black. I jerked back when Mama Darkness finally pulled her hands out of the bowl, dry and spotless.

"Now, beloveds." She said, eyes twinkling with starlight. "I look at your fates." Her long lashes fell as her half-lidded eyes peered at the bowl. The water shifted and sloshed, even though her hands were on the table, motionless. The light from the bowl illuminated Mama Darkness's face, throwing shadows into every crack. That was when she started laughing.

It was a deep belly laugh, thick body vibrating with her exultations. Her eyes shut and her earrings tinkled. Gladys and I shared a worried look, unsure how to proceed. Finally, her howling died down and she looked at us with mirth, her cheeks flushed dark brown.

"You both been jinxed alright!" Mama Darkness cackled, looking from Gladys to me. "Dey snipped your cock and cunt right off! So clean your body don't even know it gone!" Her accent was getting worse, but it was all too easy to follow the gist of the sentences.

"Can you fix it?" Glady's asked, her voice betraying an anxiety that mirrored my own. "I'll pay you. Whatever you want!" She started to reach for her purse.

"Now hold on." I said hastily. Gladys was MY client. If she was spending any money on this case, it would be to me. "Mama Darkness, what can you tell us?" She regarded me with her dark eyes. The smile still toyed with the corner of her lips, but her eyes were all reptile, a crocodile studying hapless prey.

"I help you." She said, smirking. "I make the price." I clenched my hands into a fist. Here was where she would screw us. She had us over the barrel and she knew it. She cleared her throat.

"Girly." She said, looking at Gladys. She beckoned with a hand. "I help you first. Take off top." Gladys looked startled to be addressed like that and more startled at the request.

"Why on earth do you need me to do that?" Gladys said hotly, a pretty blush coloring her face.

"To help you get your pussy back, stupid girl!" Mama Darkness said as though chiding a child. "Like calls to like. Pleasure to pleasure. If you want to find your missing cunt, we use your boobies." Gladys balked, leaning back in her chair. She stayed that way for a moment, and I saw her thinking furiously. Finally, she sighed.

"To get back my vagina." She lamented. She undid the buttons of her white blouse, one by one. When she'd undone enough of them, she shrugged the top off, the bottom still tucked into her skirt. My eyes swept up and down her body. Hills of creamy smooth flesh mesmerized me. My vision roved along the curve of her prodigious breasts, straining against the red industrial-strength bra heroically supporting them.

Mama Darkness gestured to the bra and Gladys rolled her eyes. She leaned forward to undo the clasp on her bra. My heart nearly stopped as I stared into that cleavage. I longed to reach out and grab those tits, suck them, play with them. My dislocated erection agreed, painfully hard, somewhere. As the red fabric was pulled away, I lost me breath. Huge round tits, soft yet firm despite their size, bounced free. Gladys crossed her arms in front of them defensively, but it only pressed them together and made them look even bigger.

"Well?" She said, embarrassed. Mama Darkness bade her to come closer, eyes on those titanic orbs. Gladys got out of her seat and walked around the round table, blouse trailing her like a wedding train.

"Dominick." Mama Darkness said, shocking me out of my pillowy reverie. I started, my mind fuzzy. She pointed to Gladys, who was standing before her nervously. "You hold her arms back. She move during the hoo-doo, the hoo-doo not work." I met Gladys's eyes, asking without speaking. Gladys nodded, her mouth a firm line. I got up, once again grateful my erection couldn't be seen. I grasped Gladys's soft biceps, gently pulling them back behind her. Glady's gave a small gasp at the touch and Mama Darkness grunted in satisfaction.

"Now we begin." Mama Darkness said. She dipped her long hands into the bowl of red liquid on the table. She swirled her fingers for a moment, then brought them up. Now, they glistened with a red sheen. She brought her hands over to Gladys's chest. Mama Darkness grasped each breast in one hand, cupping the massive flesh.

Gladys's breath caught, her whole body reacting to the touch. Mama Darkness began tracing spirals on Gladys's tits, making looping circles around her nipples. She shook and gasped at every stroke. Her breath came faster, and her body shivered. She tried to squirm, but I held her in place as Mama Darkness traced intricate patterns on her breasts. Gladys moaned, throwing her head back. Her hair hung loosely now, some falling over her face, concealing her rolling eyes and open mouth. Her thighs rubbed together, but I held her tight against me. I could feel her butt pressing against my crotch, bumping mindlessly as Gladys tried to buck her hips. Over her cries of pleasure, Mama Darkness began to speak.

"Your cunt was a pleasure for you." She said, the spirals swirling closer and closer to Gladys's nipples. "Your tits too. Now we use one to find the other." She cupped a large handful of breast in each hand, and her fingers pinched her nipples. Gladys screamed as Mama Darkness pulled her nipples, twisting them sensually. It took all my strength to hold Gladys down. She was shaking, her head lolling wildly, caught in the throes of an orgasm. After an indeterminable time, Mama Darkness stepped back. Gladys's head dropped limply ahead, and I let her go gingerly. She stood on wobbly feet.

"N-" Gladys started, breathless. "Now what?" She put her hands under her breasts to inspect the red markings that spanned her breasts. Before my eyes, they began fading, sinking into her skin. The smooth skin looked unblemished and Gladys noticed my stare. She hurried to pull up her bra and dress, denying me any further looks.

"Now," Mama Darkness said, wiping her hands on a handcloth. "We fix you, Dominick." She fixed her black eyes on me, hooded in mystery in the poor lighting of the room. She swirled one finger in the bowl of liquid, her eyes never breaking contact with mine. "Like calls to like, Dominick. Your cock is pleasure to you, but your tits no good." I breathed a sigh of relief. I didn't want anyone fondling my less than impressive chest. What she said instead didn't fill me with relief.

"Drop your pants."

My mouth gaped, confusion tumbling my thoughts. Embarrassment at my situation made me hesitate. Gladys's smirk and twinkling eyes didn't help. Mama Darkness stared me down, her stern expression brooking no defiance. Brick by brick, I felt my resolve crumble. With a sigh, I stood up, fumbling for my belt buckle.

"You better be right, Mama." I said, hastily removing undoing my pants. The sooner I got this done with, the less embarrassing it would be. I still didn't know how Gladys would react to my missing bits.

"Oh, come on, Mr. Dentene." Gladys mocked. "I didn't put up half as much fuss when it was my turn." My cheeks burned from her goading. I yanked my pants and underwear down in one motion, baring my crotch and legs. I stood defiantly, hands on my hips. Gladys let out a small gasp, leaning forward to inspect my infirmity. Mama Darkness took it in silence, her eyes glittering hungrily.

"Closer, lamb." Mama Darkness crooked a finger at me. I shuffled forward, my pants hindering my ankles. The stuffy air was cool against my exposed skin. I resisted the urge to shiver. I wished I had a drink to calm me, keep me smooth. Mama Darkness grabbed my waist and pulled me even closer. I was now barely a foot away from the seated woman. My dislocated dick trembled, wherever it was. It knew how close to a woman I was.

"Stay till now, lamb." Mama Darkness said. She swirled one hand in the rose-tinted water on the table. Her fingers glistened in the candlelight when she took them out. With practiced precision, she brought those fingers to my crotch. She pressed them gently against the smooth area. The effect was immediate. Electricity shot through me from the contact. My dick spasmed in pleasure. I gripped the side of the table to avoid stumbling backwards.

Mama Darkness kept moving, tracing her long nails against my groin. I closed my eyes and hung back my head, trying to ride the waves of pleasure zipping through me. My dick, bereft of touch for almost two days straight, was hypersensitive to the touch. Every stroke Mama Darkness sent me gasping for air. I grunted and bucked my hips instinctively. Mama Darkness frowned and grabbed my rear to steady me.

The next few minutes were lost to a haze of pleasure as Mama Darkness did her hoo-doo. My phantom penis was throbbing in ecstasy. The pleasure peaked and I found myself cumming, cumming. Thick cum spurted out of me, released into the void. I trembled as I came, before staggering back into the chair behind me. Sweating, I looked down to see red designs fading, seeping into my skin. Mama Darkness sat back as well, a self-satisfied smirk playing on her lips.

"There you are." She said to me and a red-faced Gladys. I realized how my perfomance must have looked to her and slid my legs together. I focused on Mama Darkness instead.

"That's it?" I asked. "How will this help us find our privates?" She laughed and waved a bejeweled hand.

"The magic will point to your missing cooch and penis." She said, lacing her fingers on the table. "Follow the pleasure, find the missing parts." Her eyes twinkled madly think the embers of a fire and she seemed larger than the plump dimensions of her body. Shadows seemed to bend to cast themselves over her, masking her smile in mystery. "I'll take that payment now."

#

"Crazy broad." I muttered, staring at the crumbling brick of the house. The entire neighborhood seemed to sag, like an old man bent over his cane. The tingling sensation in the back of my neck of being watched had only gotten worse the deeper we went into the slums. Our little magic compass had brought us into the heart of the rough side of town. Were it not for my revolver, tucked into the back of my pants, I would never had allowed Gladys to come. Hell, I wouldn't have come here myself. But a job's a job.

"It's definitely in there." Gladys returned from down the block. She'd walked past the house to confirm her magnificent melons were pointing at the cracked windows and dull siding of this house. She shuddered. "I hope they're keeping my vagina somewhere... hygienic." I grimaced, eyeing the rusted railing on the steps. Peeking through the windows had been pointless, with ratty curtains blocking every angle inside. I adjusted the hat on my head and screwed up my resolve.

"Ain't gonna find answers out here." I sounded much braver than I felt. I hated dealing with unknowns. Unknowns jumped you in an alley and poked your kidneys with something sharp. But this was the place. I'd never known Mama Darkness's magic to fail me. If my tingling crotch said this was the spot, there wasn't much wiggle room. Except in my pants, unfortunately. Back straight, shoulders out, I made my way up the steps, Gladys a step behind me.

The doorknob was locked, but a good kick and the door swung open. Inside, the air was stale, dust motes flying every which way. Using the light from the door I squinted around the living room. Furniture and carpeting, just as worn as the outside. A quick search around the house left me with the impression no one had lived here for years. Or, it would have, except for the basement door. Try as I might, I couldn't ignore that.

A real bastard of a door, heavy steel that caught the tiniest mote of light, gleaming. A truck could probably run into that door and walk home with its tail between its legs. I glared at that door for a good five minutes, deciding what to do next. Too thick to batter down. Gladys came up beside me.

"That's a hell of a door." She whistled. I nodded absentmindedly, still trying to get this door's number. So of course, Gladys walked right up to the damn thing and knocked.

I froze as the she thumped it once, twice, three times. Shit. So much for subtlety. For a breathless second, there was only silence. Then, as whisper of air and the door swung open. A well-lit stairwell descended, far deeper than I would have expected there to be room for. It must have gone forty- no, fifty feet down. Even as I watched it appeared to elongate. I looked back at Gladys. She was transfixed as well.

"Ladies first." I said, sweeping a hand. She gave me a dirty look, clutching her purse. With a sniff, she took the first step, then the next. I was quick to follow, never more than a step behind. We'd scarcely gotten ten steps down when the massive door slammed shut behind us.

Gladys and I shared a look in the dim light of the stairwell. There was only one direction to go. With our eyes set on the distant light, we made our way down, down, down.

*

Darkness ain't natural. Sure, some of the best things happen in the dark, and some of the dirtiest. But people ain't made for the dark. We like the light, like moths. I'm not ashamed to admit that being in that near-pitch black corridor put a little pep in my step and I practically bowled Gladys over as we made our way towards that light coming from the bottom of the stairs.

"Easy now." I slid past her, my arms gently rubbing against her breasts as I maneuvered. The corridor was small, what was I supposed to do? Anyway, I pulled out my revolver and thumbed the hammer. Whatever we met down there, I wouldn't be caught with my pants down.

The light was closer now, barely fifteen steps away. Shadows flickered across it, formless and gone in an instant. I took the last few steps nice and easy, keeping my footing. I don't know what I was prepared for, but this wasn't it.

An opulent hall, as large as a palace and just as shiny, came into view. The walls were draped with animal skins and embossed tapestries. Long tables stretched from one end to the other, laden with the queerest objects I'd ever seen. Even Mama Darkness's offices looked tame next to the eerie assortment of dried and pickled animal parts assorted on the tablecloth. Gold seemed inlaid into every crevice, casting a brilliant light to illuminate the room. I stood dumbly at the bottom of the steps, unsure what to do next.

"Welcome!" A voice boomed out. I squinted. Was that a throne? "Approach!" From what I could see, the man sitting on the throne was dressed in a neat pinstripe suit, but I couldn't make his features out from the entrance. Gladys put her hand on my shoulder.

"Where is everyone else?" She whispered. "So much room and no one else is here?" I looked around. She was right. Even though the tables were full and there were seats aplenty, I couldn't see a single other person. What sort of throne room didn't have servants? We didn't have a choice. We approached.

"Who are you?" I challenged, keeping my gun trained at the man on the throne.

"No one." He didn't even flinch. "And the most important man in the world. You many bow, if you wish." I didn't. Now that I was closer, I could see him more clearly. He was black, with neatly trimmed hair and smooth skin. His cheekbones could slice through diamond, and his smile was unnaturally white. Though he was sitting, I could tell his suit was expensive, and tailored perfectly for his broad body.

"I've never seen you before in my life." To my credit, my gun didn't waver. Mama Darkness's spell was pointing me right at the man. Was he the one who held our privates?

"Maybe you've seen my associate?" The man snapped his finger. From some side entrance came a white man, wearing shades and with a long tattoo trailing down the side of his neck. He didn't say a word as he took his place to the right of the throne.

"You!" Gladys shouted. From her handbag, she pulled out a snub-nose revolver of her own and waved it at the man. "You were the one who- who drugged me! And took my vagina!" This was getting out of control. Where had she gotten that gun? I rested my hand on her gun arm and slowly brought it down.

"We gotta get answers first." I said, lowering my own gun. "If they get sneaky we can shoot 'em later." Gladys grimaced, but to my relief, didn't argue.

"Smart man." The enthroned man said. "You must be, to have found me so quickly. Most never even get to this house." Most? There were more like us? How many people had he done this to? The man kept talking, clearly enjoying the sound of his own voice.

"My man took your pussy, yes. And his cock too." He waved a hand laden with rings at me. "Under my orders." I didn't like his grin.

"Why?" I growled. "Some sort of witchcraft? To add to your collection?" I jerked my head towards the tables. The man laughed, deep and booming in the cavern.