The Coffee Shop Pt. 03

"Go ahead," Andrew replied, grinning wolfishly. "I'll wait. For you, I'll wait forever." He chuckled.

I smiled back at him and hurried through the swinging door the kitchen. Once there I stumbled towards the nearest chair and sat down in it. I tried to get hold of myself, as I felt my smile crack and my control collapse. What cruel twist of fate had caused Andy to use the exact same phrase that Bert had always said to me? "For you I'll wait forever." How I hated to hear those words. They were like a long dull knife twisting into my soul and scraping away at my heart. Andy could not possibly have known how much that innocent remark hurt me. I had cried myself to sleep for weeks after Bert walked out of my life, and I'd thought I was finally finished, but those few words had proved me wrong. I might be able to stop thinking of Bert, but now the floodgates had opened again. The hurt and pain that I had kept hidden inside was breaking out now, and it could not be denied. It had to be washed way with the bitter sting of tears. It was all I could do not to cry out loud. I just tried to control my sobbing as much as possible, and to keep reminding myself that I HAD to pull myself together. Andrew was out there waiting for me. I kept my eyes tightly shut and absently noticed that the tears were starting to roll down my cheeks in a steady stream.

How long is a minute? Someone once told me that how long a minute is, depends on which side of the bathroom door you are on. I opened my eyes and looked down at the kitchen table to discover that there was a small puddle of water on it. I had not realized that I'd been crying so much or so long. I blinked my eyes a few times to clear them as I suddenly remembered Andrew. I hoped he wasn't annoyed with me at keeping him waiting. I looked up and got the shock of my life!

Andrew was kneeling down beside me, looking up at my face! I did not have any idea how long he had been there nor how much he had seen. I hadn't heard him come in, I'd been so upset. My face burned crimson. I felt exposed, open and vulnerable. As Andy continued to look up at me in silence, I felt naked before him. I'd broken down and blubbered like a baby in front of this man, whom I hardly even knew. What must he think of me? Weak. Feminine. Not able to control myself. A real wimp, yup that's me all right. I blushed all the more, and thought my face would catch fire it was so hot. I looked at Andy kneeling there and I wanted to say something. I wanted to try and explain to him, but my tongue was stuck in my mouth. The words would not come. Oh, how I wished he would just say something, anything and then just leave in disgust. It was far worse sitting here and waiting for those harsh words to come spilling out of that sexy mouth of his. Even now, as distraught and discombobulated as I was, I couldn't help but notice just how good looking and sexy Andy was.

I couldn't stand it. I turned away from him and silently started crying anew. This time though, I was crying at my loss of control and for having spoiled Andy's evening. The tears were slow in coming, but they did come. I closed my eyes tightly and hoped to hear the sound of the front door closing as Andy left.

A big strong warm hand cupped my chin, softly. I opened my eyes slowly as Andy pulled my face around to look at his.. I blinked several times to get the last of the tears out of my eyes and sniffled a couple of times. I looked at his lovely, wonderful face again, and my lips trembled. "I must look like some sad little puppy, whose been lost in the rain," I thought to myself. "Dear God, no! Please not his pity! Anything but that! I can't stand the thought of him feeling sorry for me!" I shrieked silently inside my head. Isn't it strange how in the midst of such deep sorrow, pride can still come to the surface?

"Who did this to you?" He asked softly. "Whatever could he have done to you that hurt you so badly? Why did you run away and hide? Please, tell me. Maybe I can help. Or is it something I did?"

Oh God, how I wanted to! I ached to throw myself into his arms, and explain it all to him. I struggled to maintain my control. All I could do was to gently shake my head from side to side in a silent 'no'.

"I thought you trusted me, Paul," he said calmly in a near whisper. "I trusted you and I still do. I can be your friend, and I want to be your friend, but friends trust each other. I've got all the time in the world. How about I make you that cup of tea while you pull yourself together?"

I slowly nodded a 'yes'. Andrew stood up and busied himself with making two cups of tea while I dried my face, and tried to calm down. It was rather soothing to see him walking about getting things ready. I suspected that he knew that I enjoyed looking at him, and thought that a little more gawking at him would do me some good. He was right. By the time the tea arrived, I was able to talk, and after a couple of sips of tea I felt strong enough to tell him some of the story.

"I broke up with a man named Bert several weeks ago, and he always used to use that phrase 'for you I'll wait forever', whenever I asked him to wait for me," I said to Andrew. "When you said it just now, it brought back some painful, and unpleasant memories. Look, I'm sorry for the show I put on just now. I'm not normally like that." It was a lame explanation, and Andrew knew it. He merely cocked one eyebrow at me and waited.

"I see," he said and sipped his tea quietly. Unspoken was the request to continue.

"That's really all there is to it," I lied to him.

"When you want to tell me the rest, I'm ready to listen," Andrew replied, soothingly. "Somehow, I don't think that my uttering a few words could result in such a strong reaction in you. There's more, I'm sure. Might I ask you a question?"

"Okay, I guess so," I replied hesitantly.

"Are you concerned that because you are on the 'rebound' from this Bert, that you might overreact to me?" He asked. "Is that why you are so hesitant about doing any more hypnosis? Bert was one of your other subjects, wasn't he? I'd guess that he looked a bit like me, too, right?"

"That's four questions,. Andy," I said to him and smiled weakly. I was amazed that I could smile. "You're right though. I am concerned because I'm on the rebound as you put it. Bert was a hypnosis subject of mine, but he did not look anything like you do." I choked on the last few words as I said them.

"I see," he answered and smiled back at me. "Feeling a bit better?"

"Yes, a bit," I answered.

"Good," he said. "Tell me the rest, or as much as you can, please. I want to be sure that I don't do anything else to upset you like this again."

The man was good, I had to admit that. He must have had some therapy counseling, because he sure knew how to get people to open up to him. Once he had me admitting to him that he wasn't at fault for tonight's performance, it did not take long for him to get me to tell him most of the story of my breakup with Bert. I blushed in embarrassment as I admitted to Andy that the breakup had happened several months ago, and not several weeks as I'd originally told him. Andy merely smiled at my confession of lying to him, and urged me to continue with the story.

It turned out that Bert did not want our relationship to move from hypnosis into something more physical, with less hypnosis involved. In fact Bert refused to become physical at all. He would not even undress to the point of taking of his shirt. All that Bert wanted was to have long and wonderful hypnosis sessions with me, but without any physical contact other than hands on clothes. I wanted more. I was sure I was in love with him and wanted the relationship to develop. Bert did not feel the same way. When I started to push the subject of our relationship and where it was going, he dogged it at first but after a few months he finally came out and told me the truth. He was interested in me only for my hypnotic abilities. He liked me, but he wasn't really attracted to me 'in that way', as he put it. Since Bert was not immune to my super hypnosis powers, I could have taken my revenge on him, if I'd been inclined to. I'm not a mean or petty person, so I didn't. Besides, it was partly my fault. I'd read too much into the relationship, and expected too much from him. I'd confirmed those facts the hard way, by forcing Bert to tell me the truth. I think that was why it hurt so much, I'd been fooling myself and seeing only what I wanted to see.

Of course I didn't mention anything about my powers to Andy, and since they didn't seem to work on him, he'd probably not have believed me anyway. Still, it was safer not to say anything.

Andrew listened during my monologue with undivided attention. There were a few times when I choked up and had to take a sip of tea to continue, but he didn't say anything. He waited quietly and smiled encouragement at me, when I paused. I had not realized until then how much I needed to talk to someone about this. It wasn't something that I could discuss with just anyone, which is one of the main drawbacks about staying in the closet. With Andrew though, it felt right somehow. I didn't offer any details about Bert's hypnosis session with me, and Andrew didn't ask for any details. It seemed he wasn't the prying kind. I finally finished my cup of tea, and sat back in my chair to wait for the verdict. Verdict was the correct word, too. Andrew was judging me on all this. I wasn't sure what he would make of it all.

"That's what I get for leading with my heart all the time. I guess it was bound to get bruised once in a while. You'd think I'd learn after all these times, come to expect it even and not get so upset when it does happen," I said to him in a lame excuse for my actions.

He sat back in his chair and stroked his tie absent-mindedly. He looked at me and smiled again. I smiled back at him since I couldn't think of anything else to do.

"That's quite a story," he said. "From what Jack and Steven have told me about you, and your relationships with them, I can see how you could be hurt by all this. You appear to be as kind and compassionate as they said you were. I believe your story Paul. I don't understand, though, how it relates to me.."

"I want more than just hypnosis with you, Andy," I said in a rush before I could change my mind and keep silent. "I want the physical contact with you that I couldn't have with Bert. Your body is very attractive to me, and I want to spend endless hours running my fingers over your skin and bringing you to countless climaxes. Even just lying next to you in front of the fireplace, snuggled next to you, would be a thrill. Whatever we both agree to, in and out of hypnosis."

"But," I continued after a quick breath. "I'm not sure of what it is that I feel for you. I don't know...hell! I'm afraid that you'll reject me too, now that you know what I want."

"So that's it," Andrew said as he nodded thoughtfully. "That's a lot to take in all at once. I can't fault you for being honest." He leaned over and brushed my cheek with his right hand. A sudden and profound thrill coursed through my body. Hell, I'd done it again! I was falling head over heels for a good looking guy in a uniform! Some people just never learn, and it seems as if I'm one of them. "You're wrong, you know," Andrew said to me softly, as he gently stroked my cheek. "You've got to keep leading with your heart, if you ever want to find that special someone you're looking for. You amaze me, Paul. There is a sweetness and kindness about you that comes through loud and clear, despite all that you've gone through. Your heart might be dented, as you said, but it seems like a pretty strong and courageous heart to me. You seem honest and straightforward, about what you want and how you feel. I find that refreshing and different." Andrew look a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh, as he paused to think for a moment. "I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like you. You're very special, and I'm glad, no happy, to have met you tonight." Andrew actually beamed at me as he smiled. I hoped that he meant what he said, and for now I was willing to take him at face value. I felt a lot better, and I smiled back at him in silent thanks.

He stood up in front of me, and suddenly frowned at me. I went ice cold. "You're forgetting one very important fact though, Paul." He stated coldly.

"What's that?" I asked timidly. "What could I have said or done tonight to make him suddenly turn a cold shoulder to me like this?" I wondered to myself.

"I'm not Bert," he said as he slipped off his uniform jacket and hung it up on the back of his chair. I watched flabbergasted, as he stood there with only his undershirt preventing me from seeing what his chest looked like. I had expected a uniform shirt and tie, but then realized that with his scarlet tunic and the way the collar of that jacket was done up a uniform shirt and tie would have been impractical, not to mention uncomfortable as hell. My jaw dropped when he slowly and sexily placed his hands on his hips and stood there looking at me, with a hint of a smile on his face. I would eagerly have jumped up and given him a huge hug, just because he looked so damn sexy, but I was loath to break this magical spell that seemed to have be cast tonight. He stood there looking down at me with a grin on his face that could have melted the north polar ice cap. It was sure as hell melting my heart. I tugged at my shirt collar as it suddenly became uncomfortably warm in the room.

He didn't just yank his undershirt out. He pulled a little bit here and a little bit there, while slowly turning around to give me a view of his back as well as his front. Those uniform pants were somewhat loose (they were riding pants after all), but they did cling around his buttock enough to give a hit of what Andrew's butt might be like. Eventually, though he got the undershirt pulled out and it soon joined his uniform jacket on the kitchen chair. He stood there bare chested, yes , naked from the waist up, looked at me, smiled and slowly turned around a couple of times.

My eyes bulged out of my head as I got a good long look at his upper body. His chest! It was everything I'd hoped for and more. He had huge rippling muscles everywhere! I knew that he had to be working out in a gym regularly to have a build like that! His chest tapered down gradually to a flat stomach with rock hard abdominal muscles. The rippled effect of the muscles on his stomach reminded me of the old washing boards that were used to wash clothes with before the invention of washing machines. Now I knew what the term 'washboard stomach' meant. (By the way just because I know what a washing board is, doesn't mean I'm THAT old. I just happen to know a little history. For those of you who do not know what a 'washboard stomach is, the current term is 'six-pack abs'.) His skin was smooth and clear, where it wasn't covered with a dark mass of hair. The hair on his chest and stomach wasn't thick like a mat or was it sparse, it was just sprinkled around liberally. It was roughly in the shape of a tree with the leaves and branches being on his upper chest and pectoral muscles, and the trunk of the tree going down the center of his abdomen and stomach. The 'tree' probably continued past his waist with the 'roots' of the tree firmly covering his genitalia. Since I didn't have X-ray vision I couldn't be sure of that, but it was a most pleasant thought.

His shoulders were massive, and as heavily muscled as his chest and stomach. My gaze traveled down his left shoulder to his left arm and kept on going right down to the fingers of his hand. I switched my gaze over to his right arm, and delight lit up my face as I discovered it was a perfect match for his left arm, hand and fingers. What beautiful and strong arms he had! I would not minded trying to resist arrest, if he were the arresting officer! A small sigh escaped my lips as I directed my attention back to his chest and then walked my eyes upward towards his face. His neck was thick and strong, and it was sculpted wonderfully. The progression from his wide shoulders to his sturdy head was as smooth and graceful. God had certainly been showing off when he designed Andrew's body.

I was struck dumb with amazement. All I could do was sit there and stare at Andrew like some gawking country boy on his first trip into a big city. Andrew was simply the most handsome, no make that beautiful, man that I had seen in a long, long time. He reminded me of Steven Stokes. I liked what I saw (boy is THAT an understatement), but I could not bring myself to approach Andrew. This just HAD to be a dream, and I was certain that if I moved a muscle I'd wake up and it would all be gone.

Andrew looked at me, with that sexy smile on his face and tilted his head at me in puzzlement. He moved towards me. His steps were so fluid and graceful that I swear he must have floated and not walked over to where I was sitting. He paused for a moment as he stood in front of me. All I did was to continue to ogle him, but close up. It was so much more interesting seeing him up close. Reaching out his right hand he took my left hand in his right hand and slowly pulled me to my feet. I couldn't have resisted even if I'd wanted to. I was still stuck in a state of bewilderment. Slowly he brought my left hand to his lips and tenderly, reverently kissed it, still looking at me with those soft brown doe like eyes of his. I was in awe. I couldn't think. All I could do was to enjoy the moment and marvel at what had just happened.

Finally, I made a decision. I tossed the dice of fate. Slowly and very carefully I pulled my left hand out and way from Andrew's lips and held my left hand out in front of Andrew's face. My right hand was beside my left hand in only a heartbeat. With all the tenderness and care I could muster I reached out to Andrew's face with my hands and firmly cupped it between them. I pulled that beautiful, handsome and strong head of his down towards me and tilted it slightly. There was no resistance. Andrew yielded as if his hard and firm body had muscles made of water and putty instead of the iron and steel that I knew they were like. I made the moment linger. I made time stand still, as I drew our lips closer and closer together. After a million heartbeats I felt his warm, soft breath on my cheek and then my lips were seared with the heat of that first kiss. It was long, firm, and gentle. More gentle than a mother kissing her child for the first time, but the passion and desire in that first lovely kiss was all too evident. I put every ounce of desire and feeling that I had for Andy into that kiss. He would have had to have been dead for three weeks not to have felt it! His lips were as firmly pressed together as were mine. There wasn't the slightest hint or suggestion that they would part and that his tongue might lash out against my lips in an attempt to explore new territory.

I don't know how long we made that kiss last, and it really doesn't matter, because it felt like a lifetime. (Yeah, right like I'm going to take out a stopwatch and time this event to see how long the first kiss is? Please! I had a few other things on my mind at the time!) It finally ended, the same way that it started. Slowly and tenderly, with each of us taking our time.

I let go of Andrew's face and then reached down and grabbed his hands, one in each of mine, and brought all our hands together. "Thank you for that," I said to him, as I looked at him. "It was incredible, as were you" I paused for a moment and then grinned at him as my eyes suddenly twinkled in amusement. "And no, you are definitely NOT Bert."

"I'm glad you finally noticed that," he replied with the same twinkle in his eyes. "And now what?" He asked a moment later.