The Coffee Shop Pt. 04

I was able to fall asleep rather easily that night, in part due to the relief in knowing that Andy was going to be okay, and in part due to the accumulated stress of the entire evening.

Work the next day was uneventful, if somewhat long. I couldn't recall a work day dragging on as long as that one did. My mind wasn't exactly on the job, but I made it through the day, somehow. Saturday was worse though. I didn't have work to occupy my mind, so I did everything else I could think of to help pass the time. I read books, watched some movies and even went surfing on the net. Finally five o'clock arrived and I make myself something to eat. I wasn't very hungry but it helped to pass the time. I swear that when supper was over, I paced a rut in my carpet as I waited for 6:30 PM to arrive. I figured a half an hour would be enough time to call for a cab and for the ride to the hospital, but that didn't help to make the minutes pass by any quicker. I caught the cab and let it whisk me off to the hospital. I was dying of curiosity as to what Bernie had in mind, and I was anxious to see Andy too, so the cab ride seemed interminably long.

I paid the cab driver giving him a nice tip in the process, after I arrived at the hospital. I hurried up to Bernie's office. I looked down at my watch to see that it was 6:56 PM. Okay, so I was a coupe of minutes early. I knocked on the door of Bernie's office. A few seconds later the door opened to reveal a smiling Bernie standing there.

"Come on in, Paul," he urged me. "I'm pleased to see you're on time." Bernie moved aside to let me pass.

"It's good to see you again, Bernie," I greeted him as a walked past him into his office.

Bernie closed and locked the door to his office, then he turned about to address me. "I hope you have on clean underwear," Bernie said with a chuckle.

'Clean underwear? What in the world are you talking about, Bernie?" I asked caught off guard by the comment.

Bernie gestured towards the top of his desk, with a huge grin on his face, and a twinkle in his eyes.

I walked over to his desk and looked down to see a pile of pale green clothing. For the life of me, I couldn't figure out what it was though. It seemed vaguely familiar somehow, but I couldn't seem to place it. I looked back at Bernie, with a blank and mystified expression on my face.

"Don't you think you'd better change into your surgical garb before you go and see your patient, Doctor Smith?" Bernie asked with a chuckle at my confusion.

The light bulb went off over my head. I finally got it. I grinned back at Bernie as I answered him. 'Of course, Doctor Simpson. But turn your back first. I'm modest."

Bernie chuckled and snorted his laughter at me, but he turned his back to me nonetheless. Bernie was many things and one of them was a gentleman.

I slipped off my black bull hide leather cowboy boots, and unbuckled my dark blue denim jeans. I had my jeans undone and lying in a crumpled heap on the floor faster than you could say 'jackrabbit'. My pale yellow cowboy shirt followed. I took off my black cowboy hat and set it down on the top of Bernie's desk, off to the side away from the pile of green hospital garb. I was highly motivated to change my clothes as quickly as I could. I desperately wanted to see Andy, and the sooner I changed the sooner I could see him. Love does that to you, I guess.

"Bernie would you mind helping me with this?" I called out to him as I stood there in my stocking feet, with only my undershirt and cotton briefs on. I wasn't sure exactly how to put this stuff on.

"Sure. Just waiting for you to ask me," Bernie replied as he turned about and walked over to where I was standing. Bernie didn't blink an eye at seeing me standing there in only my underwear and stocks. He'd seen more than his fair share of nude and partly nude male bodies over the years. Mine was nothing new or remarkable. With Bernie's expert help I was soon garbed like a surgeon, with the light green surgical hat on my head, a short sleeved light green surgical shirt draped over my torso, and light green surgical pants with an elastic waistband snuggled up about my legs and pelvis. One my feet were a pair of light green surgical shoes. I was not wearing surgical gloves. A surgical mask was tied about my head so that the lower part of my face was concealed. It was a clever disguise, I had to admit that. I wouldn't look out of place, and I could still conceal my identity.

The trip from Bernie's office to the ICU ward was much shorter than I remembered it. I think the fact that I was nervous, even hiding behind the surgical mask, made the time seem to pass very quickly.

"You're doing fine, Doctor Smith," Bernie whispered encouragingly to me as we neared the nurse's desk.

"Thanks, Doctor Simpson," I whispered back. We made it past the nurse's desk without incident. (Like I should have been expecting them to stop me, ask me for my ID and frisk me?) Bernie lead the way to the private room where Andy was recovering. We made our way inside without further comment or incident. Once inside Bernie checked that the door was closed before he began speaking. We couldn't exactly lock the door without causing suspicions to be raised.

I looked about the semi-dark room. It was a typical hospital room. White, clean, and sterile. Totally without even the slightest human touch. A room whose only function was as a place to put a hospital bed and a bunch of equipment. Andy was lying in the hospital bed. The bed sheets were pulled up over Andy's body covering it completely from his chin to his toes, except for his huge muscular arms that lay limply on either side of his enshrouded body. His eyes were closed, and his face was slack. He looked as if he were asleep. He also looked tired as if he had just come off of a double shift at work. An oxygen tube just under his nose was held in place by an elastic band that wrapped around his head. Andy's hair was matted with sweat and looked like an unmade bed. Despite all that, he was the most handsome and beautiful sight I had seen in the past three days! My first thought as I stood there looking at Andy in the subdued lighting of the room, was that I loved him, and I hoped he wasn't suffering. I didn't move towards him though. I just stood there looking at him. I had to adjust to the situation gradually, and if the truth be told I was a bit scared about going over and waking him up. There was something else rolling around in the back of my mind that kept me from going over to speak with Andy. Bernie had so such qualms. He walked up to where Andy was lying on the bed and looked him over carefully with his doctor's eye. Bernie turned away from Andy and looked over the monitoring equipment.

While Bernie was occupied, I looked about the room, hoping that something would click and I'd be able to figure out what was causing this slight sense of unease that was troubling me. My gaze fell upon Bernie, and the feeling got stronger. It wasn't the same creepy feeling I got when my metal powers signaled a potential threat to me. But looking at Bernie seemed to draw the thought closer to the surface of my mind. I looked away from Bernie and looked about the room. I looked at Andy and then looked back at Bernie. This was an ICU (Intensive Care Unit) recovery room., but that shouldn't' be causing me unease. I had been in one before. A sudden wave of déjà vu rolled over me and I remembered what it was that has been gnawing at the edge of my mind. The camera! This was ICU recovery room so it was monitored by close circuit television cameras. Somewhere in this room was a camera and a microphone. I walked over to Bernie and carefully grabbed his right elbow with my left hand. I tugged gently but firmly on his right elbow in an unmistakable signal for him to come with me. Bernie looked up at me in surprise for a second, but quietly complied with my silent order. I lead him towards the door. When we got to the door I stopped and let go of his arm.

"Bernie, this room is monitored, remember?" I whispered to him as softly as I could.

"Yes, of course it is," he whispered back, not understanding what it was that I was alluding to. He looked at me, blinking his eyes in genuine confusion. Then he smiled at me as he caught on to what it was that I was so worried about. "You need not worry about the security camera or the copies of the security tape, Paul," Bernie whispered to me. "A mutual friend of ours is on duty tonight, and he will hand that."

"Mutual friend?" I whispered the question at him.

"Remember the security guard Jay Turner that you, ah, handled the first time that you and I met? He still works here. As a favour to me and you, I asked him to change shifts and work tonight," Bernie explained quietly. "He'll erase the section of this tape that deals with your visiting Andy tonight. You can remove your mask in complete safety, Paul. Consider this my gift to you and Andy."

"Thank you, Bernie," I said fighting to get the words past the sudden lump that appeared in my throat. "You don't know how much this means to me."

"Oh, I think I have some idea," Bernie assured me as he spoke without whispering. Bernie shot me a look of slight worry as he continued speaking. "There is one little catch though."

"Oh, and what would that be?" I asked quietly, as I paused in the act of taking my surgical mask off. I began wondering where this conversation was heading.

"When Jay Turner found out it was you that he was doing this favour for, he insisted that you return the favour in a specific manner," Bernie hedged as he answered my question. "I sort of had to tell him it was you. He wouldn't do it as a favour to me, nor as a favour for a mutual friend. He wanted to know who the mutual friend was, so I had to tell him it was you, Paul. He uh he wants another session with you. He wants to continue where the two of you left off, what ever that means."

"I see," I said, as I quickly recalled the one and only session I'd had with Jay Turner just over a year ago. "But if he wanted another session, why didn't he ever call me?"

"I asked him that too," Bernie replied. "He said something about not being able to work up the nerve to call you, and being afraid that you'd say 'no'. Now that you owe him a favour he figures that you won't turn him down."

"Well he's right about that," I admitted. "I won't say 'no' to him. I owe him for this, and I pay my debts. I only hope he doesn't want it too soon, as I don't think I'm going to have much in the way of free time for a while."

"Deal with that later, Paul," Bernie said to me. "I think there's something more important you need to do right now." Bernie looked down at his watch. "You have about thirty minutes until the night duty nurse comes by on her rounds, if she's on time. Now don't waste any more time. Shoo!" Bernie muttered at me as he gently pushed me in the direction of Andy's hospital bed.

I nodded my head in silent agreement as I slipped the surgical mask off of my face and walked over to the bed where my beloved Andy lay. I moved one of the chairs beside the bed and sat down next to Andy, on the right side of the bed. Slowly I reached out with my right arm and placed my right hand on top of Andy's right hand. I didn't say anything. I couldn't have, even if I'd tried to. There was no way I could talk past the sudden huge lump that took up permanent residence in my throat. Forgotten, at least for now, were Bernie, Jay Turner and the rest of the world. I gloried in the simple touch of my hand on Andy's. The warmth and firmness of his skin, gave me comfort and strength. It helped to ease the aching heart that I had been carrying around in my chest for the past few days.

I looked down at that strong handsome face of Andy's that I'd come to know so well. The face that I had covered with kisses so many times. The face that had always been strong, firm, and at the same time soft, gentle and kind. Only now that face looked pale, tired and deeply etched with pain. Andy was alive and getting better. Given time he would recover. I kept those two thoughts foremost in my mind as I sat there and held Andy's hand. Seeing him lying there looking so vulnerable, helpless, and mortal was shocking to me. I had to deal with it gradually, one minute at a time. I'd always thought of Andy as more than able to take care of himself in any situation. To see him here, fighting for his life, fighting to get better, made me realize that I had started to take Andy for granted. I had started to assume that Andy was always going to be in my life. I felt the cold finger of Death travel up and down my spine a few times as I sat there holding Andy's hand. The message was delivered with crystal clarity. Nothing is permanent. Everyone's days are numbered. Appreciate every day that you are given, especially the days that you are privileged to share with your soul mate.

"I love you, Andy," I said softly to him, somehow managing to get the words out around that lump in my throat. "I'm here, and I love you. I'm holding your hand Andy." I said as I blinked back the tears that threaten to spill out of my eyes. I didn't want to wake up Andy. I knew he needed his rest. I recalled someone once telling me that even when a person is unconscious they can hear you. So I spoke to Andy. Even if he didn't hear me, it helped me to feel better.

"I'm sorry that I took so long to get here, Dear Heart," I muttered to him. "It was difficult to arrange for special visiting hours, Andy. Don't worry though, my love. No one is going to know our secret. It's safe. You're safe. So you can relax and get the rest you need. I've missed you terribly. I love you, Andy. If you don't remember anything else from my visit tonight, remember that I love you. Now and forever." I spoke past the tears that trickled down my cheeks and past that lump lodged in my throat.

I paused for a moment as I tried to think of something more to say. Tears continued to course down my cheeks but I paid them no mind. I squeezed Andy's right hand with mine, gently in a silent gesture of caring and love. "Feel that, Andy?" I asked him, not bothering to wait for an answer. "It's me, Paul. I'm here and I'm holding on. I'm here for you now. I'll always be here for you. You just think about getting well, and getting out of here. I'll be waiting for you, always." I squeezed Andy's hand a couple more times as I blinked away at the tears that wouldn't seem to leave me alone. I closed my eyes squeezing out the last of the tears, and sat there holding Andy's hand with nothing more to say.

"Texas," a soft voice whispered weakly.

"Dear Heart!" I cried out joyfully as my eyes popped open and I leaned forward over Andy's hospital bed.

"You came. I knew you would," Andy croaked, as he looked up at me the love shining in those soft doe brown eyes of his. "Water please?"

"Right," I said as I reach over and plucked up the hospital drinking glass from the night table beside Andy's bed. A drinking straw had been thoughtfully provided. I filled the glass half full from the water pitcher and held the drinking glass near Andy's mouth. I had to let go of his hand, but I'm sure he understood. Carefully I placed the straw in his mouth.

Andy pressed his lips down on the straw and took a few sips and swallows of water. Less than a minute later he released the straw from his lips. A sure sign that he was finished. I replaced the drinking glass on the night table.

"Why the tears, Texas? Cowboys don't cry," Andy said softly as he gazed at my tear streaked face.

"This cowboy does, because he loves you," I answered with a sob. "I'm just so damn happy that you're going to be okay, dear heart. And, I sure as hell missed you. I'm sorry I'm late."

"I'm glad that you came, but you took a pretty big risk," Andy said in a clearer and much less frog like voice. "What if someone finds you here?" Andy asked worriedly. His voice might have been clearer but it was still very weak.

"Not to worry, love. Bernie took care of that," I assured him, as I reached for a tissue from the bedside stand and wiped away the tears and tear tracks from my face. "How else do you think I managed to get in here this late at night, and dressed like a surgeon to boot?"

"Bernie?" Andy asked, puzzled.

"Long story, love," I said as I brushed aside his inquiry. "Let me give you the Reader's Digest version. Bernie's the doctor in charge of this ward. He's an old friend and subject of mine. He even took care of the security camera. Bernie arranged it so that the security guard on duty tonight would be an old subject and friend of mine. This man, is taking care of the security tapes. We have nothing to fear, Dear Heart. We can talk openly and no one will know. Our secret is safe."

'You do have connections, don't you?" Andy joked weakly, and smiled at me.

"I prefer to call them my friends. The best of friends, yes," I agreed, as I took his right hand in both of my hands and held on to it firmly but not tightly. "Chuck told me that you're going to be okay, although it will a few weeks before you'll be back on duty. The important thing is that you get the rest you need and build up your strength."

"No, the important thing is that you know how much I love you for coming to see me tonight," Andy said looked up at me with the love and devotion he felt for me plain on his face. "I know it wasn't easy for you to stay away. I know my police brothers and sisters. They would have pulled together and shut you out. I've seen it happen many times before. I've been a part of that. Please don't be angry with them. Please Paul, try to understand. Itheywe share a special relationship a closeness that doesn't include outsiders. I'm sorry that you had to be hurt by that, really I am."

I couldn't believe it! Here was Andy in a hospital bed, still recovering from a traumatic event and he was concerned about my feelings having been hurt by his 'cop family' shutting me out. "It's okay Andy, I understand," I told him honesty, as I squeezed his hand. "I was surprised and hurt by it, but I understand. Your police brothers and sisters don't know about us, so I can't expect them to know how much I love you. The pain and hurt I felt came from ignorance on their part, not malice. They love you, just as I do. It's water under the bridge. Forget about it."

"Thank you, Texas," Andy said with a sob, and tears glistened in his eyes. "Texas really suits you, you know. Not only are you my lone star, but you have a heart as big as Texas too. Thank you for loving me."

"Loving you is the greatest joy I have ever known, Dear Heart," I said with a stifled sob of my own. "And your love for me is the greatest gift I could ever ask for." I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, pressing firmly but gently.

"I don't deserve a man like you," Andy said with a smile. A yawn forced its way past his lips as the exhaustion he had been valiantly holding back crept up on him.

"I'm sorry love, but I'll have to leave now," I told him. "I don't want to go, but you need to rest. I know our time was all too short but we have to be grateful for what time we do have together. I don't know if I'll be able to visit you again while you're still here." I left unasked the question.

"I know," Andy agreed. Another yawn overtook him. I waited as he struggled to speak again. "I don't like to admit it, but it would be better, and safer if you didn't try another secret visit like this. We shouldn't push our luck."

"Don't you ever find it boring always being right?" I asked him jokingly, as I smiled my best smile at him. "Okay, no more secret visits. How about if I just stop by to wish you well, as one of your buddies?"

"Lord knows I'd like it to be more, but that will have to do," Andy answered, throwing a tender smile back at me. "I promise you now, on my honor as an RCMP constable, that I'll make this up to you. We'll have some special time of our own, just the two of us." Somehow Andy managed to flash me his best and sexiest smile and to raise and lower his eyebrows suggestively. He even managed to give my right hand a weak squeeze.