The Curator Ch. 17

It's a complicated explanation of finding time, being distracted with other stories, illness and the like, but I do plan to finish the story. Chapter 18 is up on my deviantart page (my home base for now, neglected2much.deviantart.com).

Have just read the whole series through thinking ch17 would be the climax.... and it isn't! You've been away a while, hopefully you can pick up again. An interesting story a bit different from the run of the mill stuff on here. Be good to see it through to the end

Thanks for the careful read. These are things like in a movie where the wine glass if empty one minute and then full the next: it's easy to lose track. (Just saw that happen on an episode of The Big Bang Theory the other day, Howard's wind glass on the train.) In fact, it's a lesson learned about writing longer works for me. Since I do like to clean these kinds of things up, I'll take a look at some edits.

The G-spot inconsistency is a reflection of what I was thinking. I wasn't really thinking Sue knew specifically that her g-spot was being stimulated in the one section. It doesn't come out right in the text though. I see what you mean.

Sue not recognizing the connection between Maya and Maggie could have been handled better. Again it was something in my thinking that didn't come out right in the text, Sue was not supposed to be a close associate of Maya at work. That's the main reason she never made the connection. In my original notes (very old and written on clay tablets), Charlie and Maggie had a falling out and Maya did not have the same last name.

I'll take a closer look at the other references to Dr. Barnes death and/or non-death. I suspect that one reflects Sue's assumptions.

I'm anxious to continue as well (I have a couple pages of the next installment written). I've had a lot of things going on with work and life in general so I'm lucky to get a half hour writing time in a day, but I've also had problems with other story ideas sort of running interference. It's hard to explain, but sometimes my imagination and thought stream get "hijacked" by other stories I'm thinking about. I've found the best way to get past that is to just spend some time getting the other ideas written down.

Thanks for taking the time to comment. I'm so glad you like the story. Positive comments are like writing fuel to me.

You mention in this chapter that Sue is surprised to find out she had a g-spot yet in the chapters with the squid the squid working on her g-spot is mentioned quite frequently. I'm assuming you simply forgot that bit because quite a bit of time has passed between this chapter and the squid chapters, but if not you need to explain in the story how Sue hasn't realized her g-spot was stimulated before. So you need to either add to this chapter's narrative or delete from it the stuff concerning her realization that she had a g-spot.

Also, I think it was mentioned or at least hinted in the first chapters that going through the third stage is life-threatening and that is why Dr. Barnes died. Later on it appears not to be so and also that Maya was Dr. Barnes's daughter. I'm guessing these inconsistencies appear because you haven't thought about using Maya as the daughter of Dr. Barnes, but in the future it's better to add a character like that, rather than give an already existing character a new role. Maya's being Dr. Barnes' daughter feels faux, because it's hard to imagine Sue not even noticing that Maya had the same last name as Dr. Barnes (and if she didn't then her behavior around her father should be noticeably different than her coworkers implying that at least they know each other - and that should be hinted at in the story if you don't want readers like me picking at the perceived inconsistencies in your story).

On the whole, though, I love the story and can't wait to see what happens next. Please hurry up with the next installment, the cliffhanger is killing me!

I think you are talking about the main events in the plot line about the Nuymeans and Sue's investigations. At the same time as that plot develops, Sue is trying to wrap her head around what's going on, what she wants, what she's trying to do, etc. She has gotten away from that original focus as part of her journey, but it's kind of hard for her to find meaning with all of that while she's sorting it all out on a personal level. At least that's where I was trying to go. She'll be circling back around shortly.