The Darkness Within

This story is fictional and by no means true. I do not advocate nor do I recommend any of the actions within this story. It is just something from my sick imagination. This is written for Literotica only.

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All men possess it to a degree. The darkness within wells just out of sight, always under the surface pooling in the heart and soul. For some it is so close to the surface that it comes out at the drop of a hat. Others take a long while, sometimes years before they succumb maybe once, maybe twice before remorse and guilt stop them from ever doing it again. Yet again others, once down the road, carry the stain and the darkness boils within, let out every chance that it can.

Some label it with petty labels, but it all comes down to control and power. Control and power over others can take one far into the darkness. Some desire it but never would take advantage of the opportunity once it strikes. Others leap at it with glee once it makes itself known. Again there are others who contemplate it and research it. They think about it and fantasize about it before finally enacting it; with trembling hearts and weak knees they concoct their circumstances and then enact the play. Once finished they analyze it to perfect it, while waiting with baited breath to see if they are caught. If they aren't, they carefully enact the plan again to successful fruition, never caught, drunk with power, they maintain their tenuous hold on their sanity while playing with the human flesh that now is their toys, always careful not to go over the edge, yet skirting it dangerously.

I am such a man. I realize that eventually I will get caught and will pay the price for my crimes, yet the thrill is there in full force.

My crime is that I, with out my wife's knowledge, consent or free will, rape my wife repeatedly, living out the fantasies that have evolved through my mind time and again. She knows nothing and feels everything. There is the thrill. I humiliate her without her knowledge, I expose her body shamelessly and with out her knowledge. I fuck her like a whore with out her consent and enjoy all that her body has to offer. I know that others would be repulsed by what I do, including her, but then again some would wonder what would drive one to do these things. I have an answer in a way. I will confess then you think about it yourself.

I was a normal person doing normal things. I met my wife six years ago and we began the normal courtship ritual. Things progressed well and the sex life was good with potential for being great. Then that potential never went any farther than that. I never wanted anything that was considered above and beyond. I am a normal man and things like feeling a woman up when she is getting ready for work and watching her getting dressed is the normal thing. I do have likes and dislikes. I like a woman in a dress. A woman in a dress is a nice thing. I don't like pants suits and such. Any one can wear it and I think that a woman that wears one when she goes to work doesn't feel like a woman in the suit. I have always enjoyed the look and feel of a woman's legs in hosiery. The shimmer and sheen along with the feel of it makes it something unique and totally feminine and it is an added quality that I like for a woman to attain and wear. The look of high-heeled sandals, not platforms, looks fantastic and speaks of a woman secure in her sexuality and looks. A woman who wears these things gets my attention. I didn't go for elaborate lingerie at first. The normal things like I mentioned were enough for me, but my wife just couldn't see the erotic value of these things and wouldn't oblige me. By then we were married. Bitter arguments would ensue because the sex had gone down and she only wanted sex every now and again. Erotic fantasy then began to take hold of my thoughts. In order to peruse what would become a fetish for me, I would look through the Internet, thinking that I would get my mental satisfaction this way if my physical and mental gratification could not be gotten any other way.

As I surfed the net, I became enamored with different types of stories that would cross the net at different times. Then I came across a story of drugging and rape. Fascinated I read the story and felt as if there was a way I could accomplish what I wanted, this was the way. Pouring over the story, I read of the slow seduction, the spiking of the drink, the type of drug used and the activities afterwards. That night I slept fitfully, thinking of my wife, caught up in the chains of the drugs and spread for me, helpless and waiting for me to be satisfied. The next day I researched all the drugs that could be attained both legally and illegally, just to see how easy it was. I came across one that was legal at the time and worked like a charm, memory loss, sleep, and positive body reaction with no recollection of what had happened. I then made a contact and attained what I needed. Afterwards I stopped.

I pushed myself to forget what I had done, purchasing what I had purchased and stashing what I had stashed. I did so well that I did in fact forget what I had purchased and stashed. My wife and I went through our ups and downs but I didn't use what I had at the time. I even stopped looking at the web sites and checking out the different things that I could have done. Then one day, my wife had dressed up for a little dinner that we were going to for a friend's birthday. In all fairness I need to describe my wife.

She is a strawberry blonde with hair down to her shoulders. She is not heavy or fat, actually in fairly good shape for an older woman of thirty. At five foot five, her slender frame has a 34 c cup with large nipples but small areola. Her legs are very well toned and fit, almost too muscular for her body, with firm thighs and no cellulite. She even has cute small size six feet and slender waistline. She keeps herself fit and trim. In all fairness, she also knew all my fetish needs and wants. Never once did she try to accommodate them. If naked wasn't good enough, then so be it. No heels in bed, no lingerie or hosiery or anything. She knew what I liked but only wore a thong for me once. She has a special box under the bed, it is large, and it is full of all the things that I bought for her over the last six years, shoes, hosiery, thigh highs, fishnets, thongs, and body suits. All new, never worn except the occasional thong for that special dress or pants.

This night of the party, she dressed in a conservative smock style black dress that zipped in the back. As she was getting dressed, I watched her while I was getting dressed. First when she came out of the bathroom, make up on and hair done, she dropped her robe to the floor and pulled the box out, her favorite pumps had broken a heel and she needed a good looking shoe to match her chosen dress. She pulled out a pair of black strapped sandals that she had never worn before and then cracked a joke about how at least the shoes had a function other than to get me off. I laughed with her but the darkness stirred. Then she pulled out a grayish black fine hose, designer style and put them together. Another joke, she had forgotten to go the store to by her standard black hose. She then pulled out a string thong and matching bras set. Another joke about all dressed up but not getting to reap the benefits. Not the first time, she had done a similar thing before. The darkness came to bear with quickness and my point had been reached and pushed to the beyond. I laughed and then moved around the bed. She went back to the bathroom for something and for some reason, I pulled the hose out around the crotch, and cut a small hole in it large enough for two fingers, but not noticeable if she were to just put it on, while being distracted. I then went to my shop were I work on my hobby cars and found the little box that I had hidden so long ago. I pulled out a small vial, one of many and stuck it in my pocket. I then came back into the bedroom. My wife had just gotten the thong and bra set on and was getting the hosiery ready to put on. This is a delight in itself to watch a woman putting her hosiery on, I distracted her with small talk and she never noticed the hole that I could see when she was smoothing the silken nylon up her legs. She talked to me with a smile and never noticed the hole there. The tong was so small and narrow that I could see her hairs curl around it and the beginning of her pussy lips at the bottom. Elation went through me and I could feel my heart hammering in my chest. As I zipped her dress up from behind, my hands shook. We then left for the party.

Normally parties like this were an in and out affair. We would come in, pay our respects and leave at the first opportunity but this time we stayed a little while longer. My wife went around talking to her friends and I talked to mine. She would get refills and different times and I could see that she was getting a little tipsy. Soon she gave me the high sign that she was almost ready to leave. I accommodated her and gave her the last drink. For the evening. It contained the contents of the vial, which had dissolved immediately. She drank it down and five minutes later we left the party and climbed into our little sports economy car. I opened the door and watched as she slid into the seat and got comfortable. Her legs shimmered in the light of the dome as she situated herself and watched me shut the door. I climbed in the other side and started the car. I had nothing to drink all night. We could not afford a DUI.

I knew that it would take roughly thirty minutes for the drug to take effect. Almost fifteen to twenty had already transpired before we could get to the car. I started the car and got ready for the quiet country drive of another thirty to forty minutes. It was almost all country road driving to get back home because we hated to drive through the city. As I pulled out of the yard she began to go under.

I watched as her head started to go back in the seat rest and her body started to go limp. I reached down and hit the power seat buttons so that her upper body went down slowly. I knew the roads like the back of my hand so there was no problem with attention. The car was quiet except for light background music as her eyes fought to stay open then fluttered shut. Her breathing deepened considerably and I watched her chest rise a fall slowly and evenly. I called her name but there was no reply or even hint of acknowledgment. I then pulled the car off road to a small clearing that I had seen far off the roadway. The jostling of the car should have woken her but still nothing but the slow rise and fall of her chest and the deep sound of her breathing. Parking the car I killed the lights and allowed my eyes to adjust to the moonlight streaming in. It was a full moon and I could see every detail of her. I reached out and took her hand, taking her index finger I pinched hard on the nail. There are a lot of nerves in that area and pinching it would wake just a normal drunk without any problems. She moaned quietly but didn't move an inch. No tightening of the body or anything. I then slowly with shaking hands, undid her seat belt and pulled her skirt up.

I pulled the skirt to her waist and then slid my hand from her crotch down to her feet and then back up to her crotch. I reveled in the sensation of her firm legs and the feel of the smooth nylon over them. I stared at the curvature of her feet in the sandals and then felt them, enjoying the feel and the warmth of her nylon clad feet. Pulling her left leg up, I pulled it over into my lap and then ran my hand up and down the center of her thighs and crotch till I found my little hole. I slipped my finger in and felt the string of her thong and the moistening lips that were around it. I gently pushed my finger in, feeling more wetness and heat. I pulled the string out and to the side and then pushed my finger back in. feeling the roughness of her hair along with the contrasting smooth wetness of her pussy as it opened wider to accept the blunt intruder. I forced the digit in and out slowly, feeling the moistness and the slickness as her body responded to the manipulation. Then I pulled back and thought about what I was doing. Years of frustration and wanting were making me careless. I was not in the controlled environment that I wanted to be in; therefore I started the car and drove back home. The whole time I drove, my hand caressed her legs, felt her crotch, manipulated her breasts, and forced her to taste the juices from her own body. All of this during the thirty minute drive home. Upon arrival, I hit the button and opened the garage door. Once safely inside, I climbed out and then removed her from the car. I picked her up and carried her into my shop. It was time to play with this woman the way I had only fantasized.

Once in the shop, I deposited her on the small couch and got set up. I put a video camera hooked into my computer on a stand and then pulled out my digital camera. Aiming it at her I adjusted the focus and began recording. I then went back to her, placing her legs wide apart, I took pictures of her thinly clad crotch and leg area, then I unzipped her dress and exposed her nipples, I took pictures of these as well. Her nipples were visible through the thin material and as the cold air hit them, they began to harden and crinkle, giving a very nice effect.

I then removed her dress completely and then sprawled her in some compromising positions. Legs wide open, hands under her underwear and pantyhose, her fingers obviously in her pussy. Then I stripped her of the hose and the thong and then placed the shoes back on her. I exposed all of her body to the camera. Nothing was safe from the lens that day. After the camera, my dark side took over with viciousness.

I spread my lovely wife on a workbench and tied her in place. The cord I used was actually white engineer marking tape. No marks, no problems. Her ass was exposed as her face was down on the work surface, her wrists bound to her ankles, legs wide. The bench was low which enabled me to penetrate wherever I wished. I went into the house and got some KY jelly that had never been used and then went back. Spreading a little on my fingers, I slowly began to play with her pussy. Rolling the lips back and forth I pulled them open and shut to the camera, her pussy getting wetter by the minute from the manipulation. I then slowly pushed in the first finger, then the second, then and the third. The fourth finger I had to pull back out and reform my hand but it slowly sank in also. B this time, my wife's as began to move in small circles as I pushed in and out. As I increased the speed, I watched as her ass increased its movements. With my other hand I stroked her clit and listened as she began moaning in arousal, still under control and out, but fucking my hand. I began moving my thumb into play, slowly gaining ground as my hand began slowly disappearing into her tight snatch. I stroked the clit a few more times and listened and watched as her body went rigid in orgasmic lock. Her body convulsed briefly and weakly as her pussy flooded with more juice than I ever saw her produce before. Her body then went back to limp and motionless.

I pulled my hand back out and took the camera. Zooming in on the gaping hole that my hand left, I turned the video camera light on and peered into her depths. After documenting the violation, then took the tube of KY and pushed it against the little brown pucker that was her anus. I squeezed some in and then pushed my finger in to make sure that I had enough for the next step. I slowly pushed my finger in and out till it was slick and her ass loosened up and got used to the intrusion. I then took out my cock. It had been leaking pre cum since I had first started this venture. I pushed the head of my cock in her ass and slowly watched it disappear into her, pushing wider and wider till it looked like it would rip from my girth. I kept pushing till I felt her butt firmly against me. I then pulled back out till the head was almost visible. I kept this up till I felt my cock stiffen and then I came. I felt as if my balls were pouring into this tight ass that I always wanted but never got to have, till now.

Once done, again I took pictures and videoed the violation. I then untied her and cleaned her up. I put the thong back on her and then the hose, after which I replaced the bra. I took her upstairs and placed her in bed as is and hung her dress up on a hangar next to her. I then climbed into bed and caressed her till I fell asleep.

The next morning I woke up early and saw that she was still out sleeping, peacefully. I went and made coffee and went into my shop. I started up the lathe and began working on some furniture legs for a table that I had been constructing. She came in about an hour later, looking tired and sipping from her cup of coffee. She asked me how I felt and then asked me why I didn't wake her up when she had passed out. I smiled and told her that she looked so peaceful that I didn't want to wake her so I just carried her up and put her to bed. She smiled and finished her cup of coffee. By her third cup, she was feeling fine though a little tired and fatigued. We sent the rest of the day just lounging around and then went back to sleep early. The next day she went back to work, as did I.

I watched the videotape for hours. I looked at the pictures for hours. I then fantasized about the next time I could do this thing that I did to her. I didn't do half of what I had thought about before, but I would make up for that this next time. Working on the lathe, I made a giant dildo. I smoothed it and sanded it to glassy like perfection. I then coated it in urethane several times to insure a glass like smoothness. I had put ribs on it and knobs to insure sexual awareness. When I got done, I measured it. I found that it was fifteen inches long and five inches around at its thickest point, which was a slow taper up till four inches. I placed it to the side and made a thinner one with a slight curve to it. It looked like a huge banana. I then built a form of a bench with leg suspensions and then inserted eyebolts into the ceiling. All this was done while she was at work and I was home. I was always home an hour to an hour and a half before she was. After the preparation phase was over, it was just time to wait.

Eventually we had a party of our own at my place. It was my party for a promotion at work. We celebrated long and hard with all my friends. Most people, wife included thought that I might have gotten a little tipsy, but in reality, I insured that the wife got drunk. Flat out drunk. I snuck good vodka into her and made her a little more than tipsy. It was kind of funny because most everyone was drunk as well except for the designated drivers. When everyone left except for a two or three stragglers waiting for their taxi, I spiked her last drink of the night.

All night I watched her as she made the rounds of the party. She was wearing a skirt that was long but the buttons in the front kept coming loose till the fourth from the bottom on up was the only thing holding it closed. She was wearing a gypsy style top with a large open neck area that would fall open if she leaned to far forward, with a flesh colored bra underneath that you could see through if the light was right. Toward the end of the night, she forgot about the skirt popping open and that her top which would pull forward. Most of the men noticed and would drop things to get her to pick them up, or get her to sit down, testing strength of the fourth button to see if it would hold or pop on them also. It never gave to expose the rest of her suntan hose covered thighs but it was close. She had on new pumps that rose to an unimpressive two inches but that would soon change.