The Doctor Makes an Appointment

[Note: This is my fourth submission. Trying my hand now at a slow developing, erotic coupling story.]

*****

My wife and I sat down to watch some TV after a particularly heavy Chinese take-out dinner. I was gearing myself to sit through some reality show about housewives that my wife was crazy about. I had two glasses of wine along with dinner, and was working on finishing the bottle tonight. But just as soon as we sat down, I had a sense she wanted to have a "talk". Fuck!

My wife asked, "So, are you going to talk to your doctor about your problem?"

I thought to myself, "Here we go," and said, "What problem?" well aware of what she was alluding to, but not wanting to talk about it.

"Do you want to continue living like this? No regular action. Is our sex life done already?"

I said in a firm voice, "I told you, there is NO problem. I am just a bit stressed out at the moment with work and travel and stuff. It will pass."

"What,? You've been stressed out for the past year? You haven't traveled in the last 3 months. You," she paused for effect, "have a serious problem. You need to get yourself checked and fixed. And quick." she said, her voice rising.

"If not, what?" I asked. "You'll divorce me?" I knew we wouldn't go that far, but she could make life a living hell for me.

"Okay, Okay. I will go," I conceded.

"When?" she demanded.

"Soon. When the time is right," I said, trying to end the conversation.

"Umpff ...," she just shook her head, slammed the magazine down she was reading and stormed upstairs to the bedroom.

"Thank Goodness," I thought to myself. "I can watch the Kings game in peace," and switched the TV channel.

We had been married for twenty four years. The first twenty were good. We had a normal life. two kids, (now off at college) , 1 dog, small house in the suburbs. We dealt with the stress of our demanding jobs the best we could. Regardless of what was happening, we had a good sex life.

I won't deny that I did not have sex with my wife as frequently as she would have liked to recently. Something just turned me off sex with her. I was able to perform once a week with some regularity, but beyond that was just impossible. It was not that I was not able to get an erection. It just did not happen to me with her.

I masturbated regularly without any problem. Usually fantasizing about the women I knew, and sometimes watching porn. So getting my dick hard and ready was not an issue here. It was more in the mind, and I could not explain this to my wife.

But the biggest stumbling block for me was having a conversation with our doctor on this topic.

We had known Dr. (Ms.) Mishra for a very long time. Being in the same ethnic community, we often saw her and her family at temples, festivals and other social occasions in addition to meeting her as a doctor for the regular stuff. And, she went to the same gym as I did, and we ran into each other at least two or three times a week. We usually exchanged pleasantries.

I wouldn't say she was hot by any standards. She was average looking but carried herself well. The fact that she went gym meant that she was serious about her health. She had a nice body - not too thin and muscled like hardcore gym junkies, and also not too chubby.

I had noticed guys (and some gals) checking her out in the gym. I confess to doing the same. It was not sexual or malicious, of course. Just taking in the sight of a beautiful woman.

What her coat and dress covered in a professional setting could be clearly seen in her gym outfit. She looked fit in yoga pants and sports bra. Her hip-to-waist ratio was very prominent. Her belly was not too flat, but not flabby either. Her arms and legs were well defined. Stunning ass. Nice calves. Tennis ball boobs. Beautiful, black, shiny, heavy, curly hair that fell up to the middle of her back. Big, bold, beckoning eyes. An absolutely captivating, radiant smile.

I could have easily changed doctors and taken up a discussion of my problem with a male one. But my wife would have none of it.

"We have been with her since we were married. I do not see any reason to change now," she said adding, "My OB-GYN is a man, and I have no issues with that."

Fuck it. Might as well bite the bullet and do it. She must have seen and talked to a thousand men with the same problem.

I made an appointment for my yearly physical. I knew I would be meeting with her a week after for a one-on-one to discuss my test results. That would be an appropriate time to discuss this. Maybe I should bring my wife too.

Yes, my wife may help distract the Dr. and also reduce the uncomfortable nature of the talk.

We made a late day appointment and my wife and I went together to discuss my tests with the doctor. She was surprised to see us both, and wondered if there was a problem.

"Why, Hi Mrs. Patel!" She shook hands with my wife. "Nice to see you. Is there a concern? I don't think we shared any results with you yet, and there is nothing that is alarming."

"Oh no, no! We are going out for dinner right after," my wife explained.

"Great," Dr. Mishra said. "Let's get down to business. All is well, Vikas, but your blood sugar is slightly high. Need to take care of that. No need for any medications, though."

I barely heard her going down my results, though I saw my wife nodding at appropriate points. I was nervous as the time to start the dreaded conversation neared.

"OK! All set, then," said the Doctor. "You are in fantastic shape inside and out, and good for another year. Just keep eating right, and of course, I know you hit the gym. Almost daily now, right? Keep that up and we will be just hunky-dory. Alrighty then, Do you have any questions?"

I opened my mouth to say my prepared statement, but I could only mumble, "Uh, yes, I ..we, uh ..think eh thought, I.."

"Yes?"

I stuttered again, "The problem is doctor,... I eh we think. thought ..."

Fortunately, my wife jumped in to rescue me.

"Well, doctor," she stated confidently. "Vikas here was wondering if you could give us a sample of Cialis."

"Wait, What Now? You? Why?" Dr. Mishra was clearly taken aback. She looked from my wife to me, and back to my wife when she noticed that I had lowered my eyes and was in no position to talk or respond to her.

"Oh! sorry. I mean, of course we can," she said, breaking the tension.

It was obvious that she also found the situation a bit awkward though she should have been trained to handle these.

She went on, speaking very rapidly now. "We would need you to answer some questions and fill up a questionnaire from the manufacturer. We have to decide on an appropriate brand of medicine and dosage. You don't need to come in Mrs. Patel. Vikas, please make another appointment with me, probably for next week? A half-hour should do it. OK?"

This I could answer. "Oh, yes, Dr. Mishra," I said, nonchalantly, trying to exude some confidence.

"Ok, then. I will see you next week," she said, shutting her computer down and standing up. She did not make eye contact with me, though she smiled at my wife as we left her consulting room.

Later, on the way to dinner my wife said, "See, that wasn't so bad. Let's hope the pills work. I heard they do."

I asked, "What? How do you know?"

"Just do."

As luck would have it, one of the first persons I ran into at the gym a couple of days later was Dr. Mishra.

"Hi, Vikas!" she flashed a smile at me, showing no hint of our last conversation in her office. "How's it going?" she asked, stopping to talk to me.

"Pretty good, doctor. How are you?" I mumbled, growing weaker at the knees.

That was the extent of our conversation till I went to her office an evening the next week. But thankfully she was not there. My questionnaire and interview were handled by a NP, a stunning blonde in a body fitting tight black pants and brilliant white shirt.

"Don't worry, Mr. Patel, I have handled hundreds of such cases. We will have you out very soon. Dr. Mishra won't be here, though"

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ TWO WEEKS LATER ++++++++++++++++++++++++

I was driving to a client meeting on a Monday morning, when my cell phone rang. I did not recognize the number though the area code was familiar, so I picked up the call.

"Hello, Vikas Patel here," I said.

"Hello! Vikas, this is doctor Mishra," said a familiar, sweet voice.

"Doctor?" I asked, surprised. She'd never called me. It was usually one of the front office girls, and I had them in my contacts on my phone. So this was unusual.

"Yes, it's me, Dr. Meera Mishra. Just wanted to reach out to you. Is this a good time?"

"Yes, it is," I answered. "I am driving, though. But I can talk."

"Ok. Good. So, just wanted to know how it is with the, you know, the treatment. The pills."

She could have asked my wife. Why me? This was awkward.

"Well, the pills are a success, I should say. They worked. Are working...rather well, if I might add," I tried to sound casual.

"Good! Good! Glad to hear," she said, and was silent for a few seconds. Then she went on, "I am actually doing a paper on my patients on this, er, pill, er treatment. I would really like to sit down with you, you know, and interview you for it. Won't take more than an hour. Whenever it is convenient to you, you know. Just call me and let me know, I usually keep the Wednesday evenings free for my academics."

"OK. I need to look at my calendar. OK if I call your office later today?" I said.

"Er, yeah OK. Er...not a problem," I sensed a hesitation in her voice. "You know what? Just call me direct? Don't want to mix up my work and this one so the gals may not be aware, you know? OK, this is my cell, so call me, OK?"

She did not sound her usual confident self. And why was it not related to her work? Well, I did not want to second guess myself at that time.

"OK, doctor. I will call you later today," I managed to say.

"OK. Thanks, Bye now," she sounded cheerful as we signed off.

That night down in my study finishing up some paperwork, I happened to scroll through the recent calls list on my phone and realized that I missed calling the Dr. back. I added this task to my to-do list for the next day.

I went to the doctor's office the next week. She had asked me to come late in the evening and when I reached her office suite, she was the only one there.

Instead of a consulting room, she brought me to her inner office and had me sit on a chair facing hers. There were some important looking books and papers strewn around her desk. She sat down and started arranging the papers on her desk. I could sense that she was somewhat distracted. If she was ready for the chat with me, it did not show.

From my end, this was going to be a difficult conversation. I wanted to make clear to her I did not have a problem to begin with. But how to convince her? I had to get straight to the point before we got any further.

"Dr. Mishra, actually, I don't think I have a problem. I mean, this is.. was not a problem. I don't think I needed the pills. I mean, I have.. I had no trouble getting it.. er.. getting ready... er.. getting an erection," I stuttered.

"Oh? Then why...,"

"I think it is more mental, if you know what I mean. It's difficult to explain, but I have trouble with doing it with Sanjana (my wife). I mean we were having it about once a week...actually, more like once every 10 days or so," I started to explain.

"Then, what happened? Why this...?"

"Don't know. It's just the thought of having intercourse with her.. Lately, I can't make myself do it like I used to. Something's changed. With her, with me, with both of us. Can't really say. May be it's the age. Don't know."

Something dawned on her, "Oh. With her...you can't. Wait. Do you mean there are OTHER women? Men?"

"What? Oh no!, no, no no. Not at all. That is not what I meant," I shot back immediately.

"Then? How do you mean? How do you know there is no problem?"

"You know, when I am alone. When I want to do it...alone.. with myself .. many times regularly...," I hesitated. I wanted to clear the air, especially with her.

"You mean, like when you masturbate?"

"Yes!" I jumped at the opening she provided. "Yeah, you know, and some other times as well. I am OK, no problems. But I find it more and more difficult with her. I cannot explain why, especially to her. It is difficult and awkward." I lowered my voice as spoke.

"You probably have to see a sex therapist rather than me," she said.

It made sense. But I wanted to make sure she understood there was no problem with me. I wasn't sure she was convinced.

"It happens to couples who have been married a long time. I have seen and heard about it, you just need to work through it," she continued.

"I guess," I replied. "But is all this going into your study?" I asked, suddenly remembering what I was there for.

"Oh, no," she reassured me. "Not this. I called you for something else."

I waited. Then, after what seemed like a minute, she started.

"Vikas, you are an attorney, right? Does what I am going to tell you come under attorney-client privilege, confidentiality and all that?"

"What? I am not an att.. I am a real estate attorney. Why? I guess we could.. well, we'd have to sign an agreement or something for sure. Then..," I was confused.

What was she on about? Any marital discord? Property issues? Divorce? Affairs?

She said, "Anyway, I want you to keep this in complete confidence. Like I do with your situation. You think you are up to it?"

"Of course, doctor," I said.

"You know, the issue you had with ED," she started saying, looking directly at me. "A lot of men have it. A lot of men get help from pills. They work for a very large percentage of men. But there are other men for whom they don't, the pills make no difference. You should consider yourself fortunate."

I said, still looking at her, "I do."

"Well, Neeraj, you know, my husband, we have been married for about 25 years, he had, I mean, has the same problem," she said, her voice becoming quieter as she spoke. "He is, unfortunately, one of the few for whom the pills do not work. We have tried different brands, dosages and all that. No luck."

This time her eyes left mine and she looked at something on her table. Then quickly picked up a pen and started fidgeting with it.

I did not know what to say. "What? I am sorry. He seems to be...," I started.

"Yes, I know. So do you."

"But you are saying...," I inquired, politely asking her to explain, to continue.

"When we had the twins at home, it was OK. We were...I was running around with them and did not pay much attention. Then college, and suddenly both of them decided to get married. So we were occupied with that. But the last year or so, it has been only the two of us in the house. Now that we have time to ourselves, we are unable to use it for what a couple really need to do, should be doing. I know we are an older couple, but still, you know...," her voice drifted off.

I could understand her situation. We all had a lot of stuff going on in our lives. Allocating the appropriate amount of focus and attention to all things was an impossible feat. We all were guilty to some extent.

"It has become a big issue. It's creating a lot of tension. It's all my fault, I agree. I should not focus on that one thing in our relationship. I am blaming him all the time for everything. He's responding by making more and more trips away from home. Also, he's not willing to look for treatments. There's so many things we can do. But he is not willing. Looks like he has given up," she said, wiping a tear from her eyes.

I was quiet. Maybe she just needed to get stuff off her chest. A sounding board since I and my wife were going through a similar situation at home. But I was still confused as to what I was doing in her office. What she wanted from me.

She looked up, sniffled, and said, "I admire your courage to come talk about your situation. I am so glad it worked out for you. But to tell you the truth, I am jealous of Sanjana, your wife. I guess she must be happy as well."

"Yes, she definitely is," I could vouch for that.

"Vikas, frankly speaking, I don't have any study or research paper. I am not going to lie to you, I did not ask you here for that," she again looked at me, and leaned forward on her chair, keeping her hands folded on her table.

I was suddenly aware of how pretty she looked. Her big, round, black eyes were tear stained, and made her look at little vulnerable. Her almond colored face was framed by her shiny, black, curly hair. And her lips were parted expectantly. The lights on the ceiling made her skin glow.

I am a pervert, I should confess. At this moment, in her office where she was talking about something so important to her and perhaps to me, I started to fantasize how it would be to have sex with her!

Her pose at her desk was right out of a 'women over 40' website. She looked sensuous and vulnerable. Her head was tilted to one side. She paid all her attention to me, looking me directly into my eyes. She did not have her coat on. I could see the tops of her breasts and her cleavage as she bent forward to talk, and her folded hands pushed her boobs up even further. Her bra straps (black) were showing on both her shoulders. And I could make out the faint outline of her bra.

Goddammit! You son-of-a-bitch! Focus!

But, NO! Thoughts still raced through my head with the speed of light. "Black bra. Does that mean a black panty. Thong? Full back? Shaved/Unshaved? Motherfucker! Look at her. Talk to her. Speak. Converse!"

"What then?" I manages to squeak.

But my inner thoughts surfaced immediately. Did I say I wanted to have sex with her? No. I wanted to preserve this picture of her, take it home with me, use it for a delicious, long afternoon jerk-off session. Fuck, yes. Many, many long afternoon jerk-off sessions.

"You know, we have known each other for what, twenty or twenty-two years?" she said, pulling me back from my reverie..

"More like twenty-five. You were my first PCP. My only PCP since. You had a very small office then, just starting out. Sanjana's friend introduced you to us. I think you have move about two or three times now. WE ourselves have moved three houses in that time, all around the same neighborhood. But we kept you all along."

"Yes," she said, reminiscing."A lot of my patients do that. I am grateful. But I want to ask you something," she looked directly at me again with those eyes.

I started to feel weak in my knees. I had never been so close to her, to have had such an intimate conversation with her. Her perfume permeated the room and it was intoxicating. I did not know where this was going, and it made me uncomfortable.

Her eyes locked on mine with a fierceness that was not there before. She said, "Vikas, I would like for us to be more than just friends." And her eyes never left mine.

What? What was she saying? I could only take it to mean that she wanted us to get to know each other better. Have coffee? Be lunch buddies? Did she mean an affair? Sex? What? How the hell? So many questions!

"I know if must be shocking to you, me throwing this at you all of a sudden, " she said.

I looked around the room and at the door, afraid there might be someone lurking, eavesdropping etc.

"There's no one there," she said, as I turned back to look at her. "Just us. I am sorry. I just wanted you to know I am interested in ,,, you know...having you as a ... friend...more than a friend actually, if you are also so inclined. I know you are surprised at me being so direct. But what the hell, we are adults. Let me say it out loud, directly. I want to be in a relationship with you."

"Doctor,. I...,"

"Meera. Please call me Meera."