The Drug Trial Fiasco

I was leaning against the garden gate with a glass of punch when I noticed Evelyn coming out onto the veranda and sweeping her eyes over the guests gathered for our cousin Emily's engagement party. Her dark eyes caught mine and she shook her beautiful brown hair as she walked across the lawn toward me, frowning.

"Timothy, are you hiding? I have been looking all over."

"Where is your glass? Do you need refreshment to cheer you up?"

We both came from a large family of Westermans. Cousins, but not blood relatives. Something about divorce and remarriage. She was dark and I was blond. I topped her by six inches, which she found irritating.

"It is too chilly out here. Let's go inside. There is dancing, and that will warm us up."

Evelyn was very bright and very feminist. She was no doubt on one of her missions to collect me for a new project. Dancing was merely a device to bring her mouth in close proximity to my ear.

"Cousin, I will dance with you on one condition."

Grasping my arm, she moved us toward the house. "Yes, I must promise not to drag you into another wild scheme involving wild women." I frowned and she laughed.

Actually, we liked dancing together, although the opportunities were infrequent, as we both had busy lives. I was in a lab at Cambridge, and she was an analyst with a firm in the City.

"Timothy, you are a handsome, eligible bachelor. Any of my single friends would attach themselves to you in a minute. Don't you need female companionship?" She kissed my cheek and pressed more of her into my front. I thought to myself, why bother with your friends if I could have you? I allowed my hand to relax further down her back. The problem with seeing each other at family parties was that curious eyes were tracking every move that might indicate romance. Or worse, plain old lust.

"This is nice. Why don't you ever ask me out?"

I didn't answer until she looked up at me and said, "Well?"

"Let me count the ways. You are too smart. You are too attractive. You are too athletic. You are a package designed to scare men."

She stepped viciously on my foot. "Ouch. You are cruel on top of everything else."

She pressed harder and backed me toward a dark corner. "I've made a decision. You are taking me home with you."

I bent down and kissed her gently. "You're kidding."

"I'm not. Come along. We are making our regrets and leaving now. We have a pressing engagement." She giggled, "Yes, very pressing," and used her fingers on the bulge in my trousers.

In my mini Cooper, I looked across and asked, "Is there method to your madness, or am I just a random victim?"

"I suppose there is no food at your apartment?"

"You are in luck. I did my weekly shopping this morning."

"Fresh coffee to grind? Perhaps a croissant or two?"

"My god, Evelyn, you are not sleeping over, are you? What will my nosy neighbors think?"

"I am on a research project. I am being paid to explore how single men live. All of their consumer choices, especially expensive durables like beds, baths and kitchens."

She smirked at me and I grabbed a hand to kiss. "You are up to something. You wouldn't dare tumble into my bed."

"Timothy, we need to talk."

The banter was a shield against the doubts creeping into my mind about the wisdom of agreeing to the weekend visit with this entrancing woman. What would happen when she discovered a set of twins in my home? Very grown up grad students who had fast talked me into housing them for a few weeks until their own apartment became available.

Gorgeous blond twins who had come back from a party drunk as could be and crawled naked into my bed, daring me not to ravish them.

Incredibly smart twins who discovered that challenging my masculinity was a bad idea. Or good idea, depending on how you looked at it. All I knew was that they each came more than once, and refused to leave my bed until late the next morning.

We were nearing my place and I smiled at Evelyn. "Maybe this is a good idea. You can meet my cat."

"When you did get a cat? That's very unusual for a man."

"You will see why in a few minutes."

I led the way to the second floor and was hardly in the door when I was rushed by two shouting bodies, "Surprise, surprise. We have made dinner!"

Everything stopped abruptly when they saw Evelyn, who looked at them in total surprise.

"Oh, maybe I shouldn't be here."

"Timothy, she is very pretty. Who is she?"

"This is my cousin, Evelyn Westerman. Evelyn, these are the Phillips sisters, Catherine and Caroline, who are camped out here waiting for their own housing."

They rushed her with hugs, saying, "Just call us C, that way you don't have to remember which is which."

"Twins, Evelyn is on a mystery visit. She made up a tale about investigating bachelor digs, which sounds terribly slutty. But she is very nice, so why don't you relax and I will make a round of drinks."

I escaped to the kitchen while they talked. It took extra time because I found some cheese and fixed crackers. When I returned, the living room was empty, but giggles were coming from the spare bedroom. When they came back, Evelyn had one of my tee shirts on, which came just to the bottom of her curvy rump. Underneath was a pair of the twins' short shorts. She was grinning from ear to ear and pushed me down on the sofa so she could perch on top.

"I am already feeling at home. Why didn't you tell me there was a welcoming committee? Felix is a marvelous addition. Where did you find such an enormous animal?

"He came with us. We couldn't bear to leave him at home in Wisconsin. There was a terrible fuss with immigration, and he just got out of jail the other day."

Felix wandered in and climbed to my chest next to Evelyn. He plopped down and gave a contented meow.

"Look, he has found two new friends." C & C were on the floor next to us, sipping drinks and smiling. I asked, "Can you be trusted in the kitchen? Do cooking and PhD's go together?"

Evelyn gave me a kiss and said, "Timothy, I am horrified to learn that the twins are sharing your bed. Aren't you ashamed, taking advantage of two impressionable young women?

Catherine was licking my hand and said, "We asked if you were paired up and she said no. But we don't believe her. You look like you were meant for one another. We will sleep in our own bedroom tonight."

Evelyn slid to the floor for more hugs. In her standard take charge voice, she said, "Timothy, I have decided it is unfair to oust these delightful girls from your bed. We will all keep you company. They will help with my research."

I took a long swallow of my drink, eased Felix to a new perch and attacked the tee shirts. As I suspected, there were six unencumbered breasts. Along with a lot of squealing and twisting and kisses.

"We told her about coming back drunk from the party, and the terrible orgy."

"How awful. All the intimate details? I thought women were supposed to keep secrets."

"She said she has been trying to get an invitation here forever, and finally had to take control of the situation."

I had Evelyn fully against me, back to front, and chewed on her ear. "She is a terrible feminist, and holds every word against me. How could such a woman let a man into her lady parts?"

They were strong, all three of them. "Lady parts! You are never seeing them with talk like that. Take it back!" All parts of me were pounded. I let the energy run down and said, "I adore you. No man deserves three gorgeous women like you. I am your slave to command." I closed my eyes.

"Felix, look at him! What a sad excuse of the male sex!" The cat climbed down and curled up with me, purring.

The three of them retired to the kitchen to tend to dinner, leaving me to commune with Felix. He allowed a careful pet without showing his claws. I was pleased not to be on his rip to shreds list.

After washing up and changing clothes, I wandered to the kitchen where an ancient copy of Larousse was open on the counter to the cassoulet page.

Applying kisses liberally, I said, "Where did you find that? It's forty years old."

Caroline whispered in my ear, "It is a real treasure, we found it in a bookstore here. Paid a small fortune. It is a Christmas present for our Mom."

"My god, you really are special, just like Evelyn. Are the three of you getting along?"

"We are learning terrible things about you. Captain of the rugby team. A medical degree in jig time. A job in a secret biology lab."

I got two arms wrapped around Evelyn, who melted back against my chest. "This one and I saw a lot of each other when we were little. Our grandmother took care of us when the parents were behaving badly."

She turned around and gave me an incendiary kiss, before dropping her head to my chest and making a contented little noise. Turning around, she announced, "Once we were grown, I could never get him to pay any attention to me."

The twins said together, "Evelyn, he is paying attention now. That was the hottest kiss ever."

"Yes, maybe after dinner, you will let us hug and kiss more."

There were loud giggles as we served the plates. "Yes, hugs and kisses."

The entree was fabulous, white beans and all. They continued to tease me, and I plotted to molest their bodies in terrible ways that would make them hoarse with screams.

I cleaned while they gathered the little dishes of flan and glasses of dessert wine onto a tray that disappeared to the back of the apartment.

I was pointed to a space against the headboard of my bed. Others were occupied by females, whose pants had vanished.

"This is too good to be true, what are we celebrating?"

"We have favors to ask."

I took another bite of delicious custard and nodded. "Go ahead."

Evelyn was the spokesperson. "The twins whispered in my ear that they desperately do not want an apartment of their own. They would like to stay here. They will cook and provide other services if I let them."

"If you let them?"

"Yes. A whole lot of things have converged for me today. I am not really happy hanging out with dopey finance types, and I am lonely for the right kind of company. Your kind of company. I need to stay here. The twins say they don't mind. They think three against one is better than two against one."

Evelyn's bare rump was over my lap, begging to be made pink. I kneaded the firm muscles, just warming up. "Timothy, stop this. We haven't done anything wrong. We are offering to share your bed and your body."

I massaged deeply into her hamstrings and further on down the gorgeous legs. "You have invited yourselves into my household? Just assuming I am so overcome with your charms that I can't resist? I am a well known junior scientist. This could affect my career..."

The twins collected the tray and china and set it safely to the side. Then there were three attackers and one victim.

"Yes, it could definitely affect your career. We will add discipline to your life. Getting up in the dark with you for early runs. Making ourselves available for sex in the shower. Seeing that the coffee is fresh and hot."

Evelyn was on her back, legs spread, the twins nudging me forward. Caroline had a firm grip on my erection, pointing it to the obvious target, which glistened with moisture. Sultry voices whispered, "Timothy, you are needed. Right now. She wants this in her."

I realized it was time for the foolish buildup to end and jammed myself smartly into Evelyn's waiting sex. There were long, low moans from both of us.

"Yes. You are good in me. Why did we wait so long?"

I didn't answer that, but worked here and there, exploring a sudden passion for Evelyn that took me on a ride into the sky and a violent rush of fluid through me and into her. "Ai, Ai, Ai."

We were turned over and catching our breath. The twins were whispering nice things and giving us kisses. "That was so good. Don't worry about us. Tonight was for the two of you."

Funny thing. Out of my clouded mind came the thought that the girls from Wisconsin needed loving too, despite what they just said. I sat up and maneuvered them to their knees over Evelyn.

"Please give my new lover a fine kiss." They bent to the task, their tight behinds getting little taps from my hands. "Yes, yes, that's right. She needs you."

Lyn's hands came up to caress the hanging breasts and so distracted C & C that the penetration of my cock wasn't noticed until I was fully sheathed in Caroline.

"Oh sis, he's got me! Oh please, don't stop!"

The next few minutes were wild. My cock stayed hard, and enjoyed going back and forth between the two sighing, pleading, wailing and laughing women. Their climaxes were marvelous to watch. Evelyn helped with nipple torture and many wet kisses.

When it was over, I pulled up the cover, my arm around Lyn, whispering in her ear, "Was that ok?"

"Yes. But you have made a terrible mess." The three of them giggled and we all slept.

I was awake in the night, enjoying female warmth on both sides. A sudden thought ran through me. My god, the new drug. The drug with no side effects! The day I took the first small trial dose was the day before the drunken orgy night. And today, when Evelyn hit on me with all she had, was the day after I took the second dose. I tried to reconstruct events.

Sandra, the head of my section in the lab, had showed up and suggested coffee. She is brilliant and easy on the eyes. One does not refuse Sandra.

"Tim, the lab has been working on a drug for reducing menstrual problems. For some reason, it has to be tested on both males and females for side effects before we can go to market. It has passed all the efficacy tests with flying colors. The test subjects won't give the samples back to us. As far as we know, there is nothing in it that would bother your system. Would you be a dear and do the trial for us?"

The first dose was five milligrams, about half what a woman would take to avoid cramps and other symptoms.

"Sandra, your secret is out. This is just a plot to feminize me into a sissy sub."

She didn't expect that and blushed very pink. "Timothy Westerman, you get your mind out of the gutter. My subs all have tits!"

We walked back to my office with my hand firmly on her rear. "You realize there must be rewards for my doing this? Testing a PMS drug is not in my job description. I want a long weekend in the Lake District in the spring, accompanied by your happy other test subjects, as well as your own beautiful self."

She pressed me against the back of my office door with a hot hot kiss, followed by a hiss in my ear, "Why do we need company? You don't think I can satisfy your horrible lust?"

We batted at each other, and she held out the pill bottle. "One today, and one more next week. Report to me immediately if you feel strange."

Here in the dark, a hand found mine and clasped it. "What's the matter?

I turned into one of the twins and whispered back, "Nothing. Just thinking of how nice you are and how fine the loving is."

That got me her body half on top, with moist sex rubbing my thigh. "I need you again."

My hands worked down her back and across the bum. Other voices said, "Secret sex is not allowed. If you get him, so do we."

I wouldn't have minded a go, but needed to think. Close contact with me was turning them on. Did the pill change my pheromones?

"Please, let me sleep and recover from your wild attacks after dinner. There is nothing left."

Three hands found my hard cock and complained, "This is ready to go. You are funning us."

I compromised on ten minutes of lazy connections. No serious thrusting, no orgasms. Just friendly connections and they were back to sleep.

I had called Sandra before leaving work on Friday, telling her nothing seemed to be happening with the first dose of the drug and I was taking the second pill right then. She wished me a happy weekend, laughed and rang off.

But now, there were definite side effects. Three otherwise intelligent women had thrown themselves at me and received enthusiastic sex in return. Now they had announced they weren't leaving. In fact, they were snuggled up to me, providing marvelous warmth and comfort. I had to say something, didn't I? A little voice said it was only three am, I needed sleep, and my new blessings could be analyzed further in the morning.

At first light, she was whispering, "It's a bank holiday, I don't have to go to work."

The twins and I whispered back, "We are not banks. Some people have work today!"

I asked the twins, "Do we have to run on a bank holiday?" My fingers were busy tickling and attacking other places.

"Are you throwing us out, Timothy? After our very bad behavior?"

"Yes, of course. I am totally embarrassed. Such a breach of good manners."

Caroline disappeared to start coffee while the rest of us wrestled. Mostly, I got to kiss delicious parts of female bodies.

"You are just a big bad bear, Timothy Westerman. We love you."

When coffee arrived there was soft cuddling going on, and we folded Caroline back in. The first sun was on the house across the street.

I leaned against the headboard and said, "I think the three of you are crazy to shack up with a lab guy, but I will never ever complain."

Lyn climbed into my arms. "You are being too nice. What if we get PMS and throw tantrums and are generally bad?"

The twins echoed, worming closer, "Yes, what if we are generally bad?"

"There is always my hand on your bottom, but I have a better idea. We will have a pact that if this isn't working, we will be honest and direct and part friends." My addled brain hoped for an escape route when the drug wore off.

I had a sudden thought. Why not use Sandra as a second opinion on the side effect? What a wonderful idea.

"I have to call my boss to see whether the Monday staff meeting is on."

From a corner of the living room, I tapped in the number.

"Hello Timothy, you are up early."

"Boss, there is a side effect but the symptoms are a bit strange. I was wondering if you had planned to skip the staff meeting, I could come to your place and get checked out. No point in alarming anyone at the office."

"You probably haven't seen your email. I put out a note canceling staff. Come right over and I will provide coffee and a fresh pastry."

Her place was only a mile away, so I decided to jog on the city street. A dose of fresh sweat would be a good test of the source of my attraction to unwary females.

I had second thoughts on the way over. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. I didn't even have any knowledge of her love life.

Just as I was closing the last few yards, another thought arrived. She got me into this. She said there was no risk. If the Internet found out the pill was even better for men than women, there would be total chaos in bedrooms everywhere!

I climbed the stair and rang her bell with a smile on my face.

"Come in, we'll just go up to the front parlor." She had a very shapely rear to follow, and my cock twitched. This was very good. She now had an aroused and sweaty male in close proximity.

"Sorry for my condition. Seemed like a good morning to jog over rather than driving."

She approached carefully and gave me a quick kiss on the lips. "Thank you for doing the test. Let me pour the coffee and we can talk about the effect you are experiencing."

I sat on the floor at her feet, saying, "You don't need sweat on those fine chairs. I'm comfortable right here."

She had a pretty pale green blouse on, along with darker green short shorts. A very nice package indeed. I checked her eyes for dilation and didn't see any so far.

I sipped my coffee and took a bite from the pastry. She crossed her legs and seemed nervous.

"Well, the good news is that my body functions seem completely unaffected. You are probably going to want a blood test to double check, but I can provide that at the office any time. Running over here this morning, my breathing was as good as it gets when I am exercising..."