The Goddess of Passion

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She leaned over the edge of the bunk and grinned at him. "Yeah, daddy. I'm fine. I sure wish this darn storm would stop so we could go home."

"Daddy, why don't you date anybody?" she asked. "Haven't found anybody I'd care to be with more than you, sweetie," he said.

"Daddy?"

"Yes, pumpkin?"

"Don't you ever feel the need for a woman, I mean, like, er, stuff, like sex?" she asked openly, simply curious. "Mom told me you were a fabulous lover and that you guys had a very active sex life."

Dell had to admit that at thirty-eight, he still had lots of sexual capacity and interest, so he said, "Well, yeah, sweetie. I do sometimes. But," he hesitated, not sure where this was going, "right now I've got enough to do to keep us going, bills to pay and the job. You know, it takes a lot of time and money to date. Anyhow, I'm sure the time will come when I want to, but I still think of your mom a lot and really don't have any interest in it right now."

"I understand, daddy," she sighed, satisfied with his answer. After all, she thought of her mom a lot, too.

"Honey, is it OK if I turn the light out for now? Dell asked. "I'd like to conserve the kerosene if we don't really need it."

"Yeah, sure," she said, and pulled her blankets around her and rolled over on her side, trying to find that depression in the straw tick that fit her hip more comfortably. Gee, she wished she were home in her own bed. They could hear the wind, still blowing strongly.

Dell wondered if it was still snowing. The wind could still blow, but if it weren't snowing, they could carefully work their way out of here. In the semi-lit room he picked his way to the door and opened it a crack. Damn! Still snowing. Not as hard, but still hard enough to be risky he thought. He looked at his watch - 2:40. OK, he thought, we'll be here until tomorrow morning - too late to even try to get out today. Since they didn't plan to have dinner until 6, he thought he'd go back to his bunk. As he sat, Jenna leaned over from above and tousled his hair.

"Hey, daddy, can we leave yet?"

"No, honey, damn storm is still dumpin' too much snow for us to try - too risky."

"Got it," she said.

A flicker of uncertainty went through her. What was happening? Were they going to be trapped here forever and die here? Fear crept in. This wasn't like her. Life for her had been clear. She knew what she was about. Her parents had raised her to be confident in her own abilities to make life good and rewarding. Now, something was happening beyond her control that could actually terminate her life, or so she thought. Out of her control was just not something she'd experienced.

She began to maunder over the things she felt she still had to do in this life, the things she still wanted to do, the things she knew shemust do. As these thoughts swept over her, almost in a chaotic frenzy, she grabbed onto one thought, recently important to her. Oh my God! I've never been made love to. I've never known a man. Here, now, my life could be ending, and I'm still a virgin. I've never experienced the joy of coupling with a man, a man I love, deeply. It's not fair! She protested. Tears welled up and began to slowly course down her nose, dripping on the blanket.

Slowly, she began to gently sob, as the sense of grief overwhelmed her - actually rooted in the loss of her mother. No! she thought, it's just not fair! Dell became aware that something was not right above him. Jenna was crying?!

"Honey?" he asked, rolling his feet to the floor, pushing out and turning to stand toward her. "What's happening?" He saw she was shaking with her emotion and he reached over to cuddle her as best he could, his arm across her back. He could feel her sobbing and kissed her gently on her wet cheek. "Jenna, speak to me. What's going on?"

Since her mom had died, whenever Jenna had appeared to be experiencing grief, Dell had insisted they get it out on top of the table and handle it - never letting her just sit in it. This had always proved to be the right thing, because it was not long before the moments of grief dwindled to nil. Jenna was at peace with her mom's passing, or so it seemed.

Dell insisted again, "Sweetheart, what's happening? Tell me about it." She sobbed even louder and then, abruptly, reached out for him and wrapping her hands around the back of his head, pulled him to her face.

"Oh, daddy," she blurted out, "What if we die here? I haven't ever been with a man...that I love. I'm a virgin!" she choked.

Her hands were running through his hair, caressing him, stroking the back of his head, neck and shoulders. "Oh, daddy, it's just not fair," she blubbered. "I'm not really a woman yet. I'm old enough, but I've not experienced that one thing which seals it. It wasn't important to me before, but now, with the possibility that my life might end here, now..."

He stroked her back and shoulders, kissed the tears on her cheeks and hugged his head beside hers. "Oh, Jenna, my sweet darling. We're going to get out of here. You're not going to die here. I won't let it happen," he asserted firmly, but tenderly.

She seemed to quiet with his soothing touches and words. Her sobbing stopped; she caught her breath and sighed deeply. "Oh, daddy, I love you so much," she said softly and they both caressed each other tenderly, lovingly, but with no signs of arousal of any sort.

"OK, honey," he said, "let's get dressed and take a little walk outside, just to check out the scene." He wanted to refocus her attention on something else, other than her grief.

She kissed him on the forehead and said, "OK, let's." She smiled, weakly. They separated and he sat down again to pull on his boots in the semi-gloom. She rolled off her bunk and sat beside him to pull on her boots. They stood together, helped each other into their parkas and prepared to go outside to face the storm, still howling.

Dell opened the door and held it against the wind while Jenna pulled her goggles into place and stepped out. Closing the door securely, he grabbed her arm and shouted for her to follow him. He found his earlier path up the ridge, stepping again in the same spots, knowing it was firm ground. She followed exactly in his footsteps - it was easier going that way.

They got to the crest of the ridge and he directed her gaze to the path out, standing with their backs to the wind. They had to shout over the wind to talk to each other.

Leaning close to Dell, Jenna asked, "Can you make out the trail back to where we started?"

"Yeah," he said. "See that stand of trees?" pointing with his left hand, "just south of the ridge we're on?"

"Yeah."

"Well, the trail enters that stand on the left side nearest us." Jenna was comforted by his certainty. She needed something certain to pull out of the chaos she had recently been experiencing, something she could 'hang her hat on', so to speak.

She couldn't really see much beyond the trees where the trail went, because they were looking uphill, but she was beginning to feel Dell would recognize the path once they were through the trees and could take a fresh sighting when the right time came. She recalled that the path through the trees was marked by the cleared space, the open ground of the trail, so she was sure that part of their path out would be pretty easy to follow. It was the larger open areas, the logged off areas and meadows, which presented her with uncertainty, or so she thought at that moment.

Dell motioned for her to follow him. Without their skis, the going was work. The snow was deep, even on the crest of the ridge, now that the wind was coursing parallel to it. He took them about fifty yards up the ridge, frequently turning back to ensure Jenna was still with him. He knew they could follow their own tracks back to the cabin, not having been out long enough for the drifting snow and wind to wipe them out.

He reached a point where he could see uphill to a trail landmark he recognized, another stand of trees, where the trail, across a logged off area behind the first stand, ended. He pointed at it and leaning close to Jenna, shouted, "That's where the trail goes when we get to the other side of that first stand I just showed you. The trail continues in about the center of those trees, looking from here."

She stood there, orienting herself to the entire scene, noting the basic direction they would have to take over the open area behind the first stand of trees. She was beginning to feel better, certainty returning. She reached her arms out and hugged Dell. "Thanks, daddy! I'm OK now."

He hugged her and patted her on the back. "Good girl. Let's go back to the cabin, start a fire and eat something - I'm hungry!"

"Me, too!" she shouted.

This was good, Dell thought. She always responded to him, his attention and his caring. He just had to get her attention off her thoughts and onto what was going on right now. She was one, fine gal!

They backtracked, leaning against the wind and blinding snow. When they got to the door, they stamped their feet to get the snow off their boots. Dell opened the door for Jenna then closed it behind them once inside.

"Oh, boy! What's for dinner?" Dell asked as he went over and picked up the lamp. He lit it and put it on the table. In its soft glow, they helped each other out of their parkas.

"How about some hot beans," Jenna suggested.

"Now, that's agreat idea," Dell said, rubbing his hands together to warm them up as he went to the stove to put in another piece of firewood.

It was a little chilly in the cabin, the fire having been banked for some hours. Still, there were coals glowing and the new piece of wood would start to burn easily as he opened the flue control slightly more. He noted that there were only four pieces of wood left, aside from a small stack of kindling which Jenna had split. Things were getting a little tenuous, he thought. For the first time, a flicker of concern touched him. Well, he thought, this damn storm justcan't last much longer, this is really weird.

Jenna dumped the beans in the pan and scooped out the remainder with a small spoon, working to get every drop she could. Then she put the pan on top of the stove. She could feel the heat growing from the new wood Dell had put in the stove.

"Well' I'm guessing dinner will be ready in about twenty minutes. Do you want me to see if I can make some coffee, daddy? There's no cream, but I did find a little sugar. There's an old coffee percolator here," pointing toward the shelf where the pans were stored.

"That would be atreat, sweetheart!" Jenna loved to serve her daddy, glowing in his response. He deserved it. He was so good to her, so loving. And, with mom gone, it made her feel more feminine, playing the role of the woman of the house.

She poured about three pints of water from the kettle of water Dell had prepared from melted snow and spooned four tablespoons of coffee grounds into the top of the percolator's basket. She put the top with the little glass center on the coffee pot and placed it on top of the stove, next to the pan of beans. Then, she stirred the beans to make sure they were heating evenly and didn't burn on the bottom. The degree of heat on the top of the stove couldn't really be controlled very well - at least, not like at home, she thought.

Yes, home, she thought. I sure am anxious to get there. Dell had gone outside to refill the water kettle with water. Better to do it now, he thought, while they were heating up the cabin and the snow would melt. Couldn't do without water and all the better if it were warm. He'd put the kettle on the stove after the coffee was done and they were relaxing at the table.

When he came back into the cabin, Jenna was setting the table, now including old cream-colored mugs which had little spider web-like cracks all over their surfaces. She had put a few sugar cubes on a small plate in the middle of the table. Dell walked up to Jenna and spreading his arms wide reached out and hugged her.

"Honey, you're one helluva tough gal. I just love doin' things with you. For sure, you carry your own weight. Most girls your age would be sittin' around expecting to be taken care of, but not you. You just pitch in without a word said and do your share. Someday, some guy's gonna marry a wonderful wife and mother," he said appreciatively.

She glowed with his praise. He was the only man in the world whose opinion and praise she cared about. It felt so good to just hold onto him, feeling his love and his strength. She nestled her face against his hard chest and mewed her pleasure at his words and actions.

"Thank you, daddy," she said, accepting his complements, "but, I'm only trying to keep even with you. You give me so much and I'd feel like a cheat if I didn't try to give something back to you." Dell mused to himself, she'll go far in life with that kind of attitude.

Then, she said, "Oops, better check the beans!" She'd smelled something.

Oh, good, she thought, the beans are done, stirring them thoroughly. She grabbed the dishtowel and folding it a few times, wrapped it around the hot handle of the pan of beans and took them over to the table. She spooned out portions for Dell and herself and put the pan on the table - wouldn't really hurt anything, she thought, noticing the numerous other signs on the table top showing that had been done plenty of times before by previous occupants of the cabin. They both ate ravenously, thoroughly enjoying the warmth of the meal and the full feeling which came from eating the starchy legumes.

Jenna, when she'd finished, looked across at Dell, wolfing his second portion. "Daddy, you're going to be a good boy and not boisterously exhibit your digestion of dinner, aren't you..."

She grinned and so did he. They both began to laugh. They both were feeling pretty good right then, in spite of their circumstances. The little cabin was cozy and they'd satisfied their hunger.

Dell got up carrying their plates to the sink. "Hey, how about some coffee?" he said. Jenna started to get up and he checked her with, "Now sit, sweetheart, I can get it."

He used the same dish towel to grasp the handle of the coffee pot. It seemed to be in the last throes of perking, so he said, "Well, just a darn minute. I'll let it drain down through for a sec."

He stood there, by the stove, smiling at her. She grinned back, feeling safe and cozy for the moment. She noted that the wind seemed to be dying down and took heart that the storm might be abating. But, it was already too dark for them to venture out that day, she knew.

After a few minutes, Dell said, "It must be done now."

He came over to the table and poured her a mug of coffee and then filled his own mug. She handed him the little plate of sugar cubes, he took two and handed it back to her. She put three cubes in her mug. She liked her coffee sweet. Besides, she usually put milk in her coffee and there wasn't any, so some extra sugar might dull the bitterness a little.

Wow, it was strong! Maybe not such a good idea to be drinking this before they retired for the night. Might keep her awake all night and that wouldn't be fun. Sleeping at least passed the time in an otherwise uneventful situation. Oh, well, she felt tired, so maybe it wouldn't really matter.

She sipped at the hot coffee carefully, not wishing to burn her lips or tongue. Dell was stirring his coffee to try to cool it a little and then began to slurp at it, drawing the hot fluid across the edge of the mug, which seemed to help cool it even more.

Jenna smiled at him. "I know it isn't lady-like, but I'm gonna do that, too," she said. "This stuff is hot!"

"Just like eatin' hot soup, ain't it." he teased, as he raised a spoon of coffee to his lips and slurped the coffee off into his mouth. She snickered at him, and then laughed out loud.

"Sweetheart, it surely makes me happy to see you laugh. You have a delightful laugh, so bright and sparkly."

"Oh, daddy." and mimicking Scarlet O'Hara from 'Gone with the Wind', she wiggled her fingers at him, batted her eyelashes and said, "How youdo run on! Dell Anderson," looking down in mock shyness, but with a sly grin on her face. Whenever she did that, she looked so cute. He grinned from ear to ear. She was her good old self again, he sighed.

They both noticed the wind had virtually stopped. "Hey, honey," Dell said, "looks like our worries are over. If it holds like this we'll be outta here first thing in the morning and headin' home."

"Yeah," Jenna said. "I sure could use a change of underwear and a nice hot soak in the tub," she giggled.

"Join the crowd, precious," he responded. They just sat there for a bit, reveling in the thoughts their recent communication had evoked.

By this time the snow in the big kettle had melted and actually had warmed, so Jenna got up and washed off their dishes and such, putting everything back where she'd found it. She was not only just a neat person, she wanted to know where things were if she needed them in a hurry. Now, who would need a cooking pot in a hurry? Well, never can tell, could be useful in a fire.

She left the undrunk coffee in the pot, took the basket out and tossed the used grounds out the front door and returned to the sink to rinse it out. She left it on the counter next to the sink. She'd put it all away in the morning, after they'd had a cup before shoving off, if they used the last piece of firewood to heat up the place. Otherwise, if they decided to just get up and leave, she'd toss the coffee out and rinse out the pot. Not really important, she thought, I just like things in order. Life sure goes better that way.

They both returned to the table, sitting across from each other, smiling warmly. Dell reached his hands across to her and she put hers in his big, rough hands, comforted by their obvious strength.

"Gee, sweetheart, this little one-day excursion didn't turn out the way we expected, but you've been marvelous. I don't know what I would have done without you," he said softly, his affection for her bursting across his face in a wide grin, while squeezing her hands gently.

She returned his squeeze and grin. "Daddy, you're the best daddy in the whole world."

She was his 'little girl' again for just that moment. He was very happy with her, but also knew, that such moments would diminish in frequency, now that she was all grown up and off to school on her own. He reveled in the moment and vowed to keep it secure in his memory, available for recall when he needed it, and he knew he would, until the day he died.

They were surrounded with quiet. The wind had stopped. Dell went to the door and opened it a crack. Snow was still falling, but softly, tiny flakes floated down and stuck where they landed. "Honey, it's still fully overcast, but snowing very lightly. We can still get out, even if it's snowing. It's only blizzard conditions, such as those we've been experiencing these last two days, that could make it difficult for us to get out in the morning," he stated.

That said, they both prepared to secure for the night, Dell picking up the lantern from the table and bringing it over next to the corner of his bunk. As he pulled off his boots, Jenna leaned over the edge of her bunk and said, "Sleep well, daddy. See you in the morning."

"You bet, sweetheart," he returned. "Sleep like a log, yourself."

She was tired. The day had been a disturbing one for her and had it not been for her daddy, she might still be feeling really grief-stricken. Since mom had died, she had been pretty much alone regarding certain things. She and her mom used to spend hours together, both of them chattering excitedly about girl things, and life and love. Dell had done all and then some that she could ever have hoped for from a father, but however he tried, and surely he did, he couldn't really be a mother. It was different. She loved him so. He was the only man in the world she really trusted, she breathed as she drifted off to sleep, peacefully.