The Greatest Force Ch. 03

Holding a leaning Alec in the crook of my arm, I froze and tried to process what I had just done.

I allowed this broken kid to be publically humiliated for his thousandth time. I allowed it and I watched it happen. I set it up. I coordinated it. I agreed to it.

I followed this broken kid home, and, like I had a good heart, deliberately made him take a bath in attempt to help him.

I grew attracted to this broken kid faster than I had ever experienced with anyone else and couldn't control myself.

I kissed this broken kid on the lips, disregarding how he might feel had I done this, and then grew intensely aroused when he kissed me back with the heat and strength of someone with trapped, burning desire.

I then shamelessly jacked this broken kid off to the point of his pure elation, to the point I know he had never felt before, to the point I knew had put me in a bad spot.

And now here I stood, holding this broken kid in an arm, standing on his now clammy tile floor on a Wednesday night.

"Please don't use me, Jett. Please don't use me. God, I'm so lonely," he sighed in exhaustion. "I'm so lonely."

His tone was begging. The words spun around in my head.

"I think it's time for bed, Alec..." I said.

But my needs were not yet satisfied, and my penis was still stick-straight under the barrier of my belt. It had been so long since I was held...so long...So I changed my mind, seeking more.

"...Alec, I need you to do something for me," I asked softly, pulling him up and allowing him to focus. I licked my bottom lip and pushed Alec down by the shoulder, barely able to keep patience. I knew he couldn't tell what I was doing because he awkwardly knelt down when I kept pushing him further. I let go of him and averted my attention to undoing my belt, my button, and unzipping my fly, watching Alec's wide eyes hesitantly glance from my face to my midsection.

"I've never --" he started.

"I know," I interrupted. "But that's okay. It's not complicated," my craving for his lips on my penis made me rush, and I quickly pulled out my uncut rod and motioned for his hand which he placed gingerly on the shaft. "I'll hold the skin back for you, give it a shot," I beckoned, pulling the foreskin back and pressing at my stomach.

At first I was almost 100% sure he was going to get up and leave, but then he looked up at me for approval as he lightly cupped the head around his pink, plump lips. I sighed loudly, wriggling my upper body, lost in infatuation. I licked my lips constantly, and grit my teeth so hard that it's a miracle they didn't crumble off. I knew that in this moment, he would do anything I asked of him.

He went slow and took his time trying to navigate around and over, a newcomer to all of this. Alec would often look up at me with his now not-so-swollen black eye to see if he was doing it right, and every time I was caught making an expression of complete and utter satisfaction. The foreskin would often slip and return to Alec's tender mouth, and eventually I gave up and put both hands on his half-wet hair. I slowly pumped my penis into his mouth, making short, gentle thrusts onto his curious tongue. I got too excited and forgot that he'd never done this before, resulting in me thrusting too hard and fast, which made him gag and pull away.

"Fuck, sorry," I breathed, but he had already forgiven me and was jacking me off. His eyes were bright and glistening, amused by this sexual experience. I came faster than I had ever, completely out of my own control, and I shot all over his neck and caught him a bit on the chin. Pulling him up, I tenderly smudged the semen off his chin with my thumb, lovingly looked into his beaming eyes, and hungrily kissed him full on the mouth.

My goal was to make him feel something he hadn't felt in a long time, or ever at all. I wanted to make him react honestly and be alive. I was rewarded with his usual, accidental moaning noises and eagerness to kiss back.

"Do you care about me, Jett?" he suddenly asked as I licked his sperm covered neck. He was tense in my grasp.

I took my time to answer, giving the grooves of his bones the proper attention they deserved.

"I care about you, Alec," I answered, wrapping my strong arms around his warm body and lightly biting his ear. I could feel a steady pace of his heart beating incredibly hard.

"You won't change your mind?" he whispered with a shaky voice.

"No." I replied. I kissed him one more time and then wiped the wet parts of his body with the burgundy towel that had fallen to the floor. I pulled my pants back up and zipped my fly, buttoned the button, and fastened my belt. I grabbed my sweater from off the marble sink and pointed to the wet jeans that were left beside it.

"You're gonna wanna wash those really soon," I stopped in front of him before heading out and caught a glimmer of despondency in his eyes as though he was second guessing something.

"Goodnight, Alec."

He said nothing and let me leave. I didn't hear a sound come from the bathroom for the remainder of the time I was in his empty house. On my way out, I passed through the grand, cherry wood kitchen and opened the spacious fridge in search for bottles of water, which I found laying on their sides on the top row. I greedily grabbed one and cracked it open, closing the fridge door and turning around to look take in the general setting. My eye caught the sight of numerous, transparent prescription pill bottles jumbled around the island, some fallen over and some different colors than others. I walked up to the island and put down my water bottle to examine the pills.

The first one I picked up was an orange package with red lining with the doctor label reading "Venlaflaxine" and another in a blue casing that read "Lorazepam." Not knowing what they meant or what they were, I put them down and looked at the others. They all had crazy names that I was not familiar with. A little notepad at the corner of the table read "Therapist: Friday at 6" with previous appointment dates above it that had been crossed out.

I sat down and thought again about what I had done to Alec in the past day. I imagined him trying to talk to his therapist and them not really caring. I imagined Alec being lost and vulnerable and without a soul to care for him, all alone in his big house and about his estranged parents who left him for Brazil.

I gulped down the rest of the water bottle and tossed it in the trash, letting the lid slam with a bang. I purposefully knocked over the capped bottles of medication and walked out of his life-barren home into the brisk, starry night.

------

I lived only a few blocks down from Alec's house, so I relaxingly walked the 15 minutes in the dark. It was getting late, so the houses nearby were dark and only a few had light shining through the curtains in rooms or porches. I familiarized my house from the rest: an average, wooden home with a so-so kept lawn and musky look. It looked like someone pulled it out of Louisiana or Nebraska and plopped down it in the middle of California. But our whole street had houses like this, so we weren't too picky about how it looked.

Before I opened the door, I knew what I was coming into. The porch was trashed with empty beer bottles, and the aroma of liquor wafted through the front door. I shut my eyes and took a deep, irritated breath and exhaled, grinding my teeth. I could hear roaring voices coming from the kitchen from where I stood. I walked in and down the hallway to find my dad, mom, and aunt wasted out of their minds and yelling at each other.

When I walked in, everyone stopped yelling and turned to look at me. My aunt passed out on the counter.

"My, my, my, looky here," my mom said in a sarcastic tone, widening her eyes and swaying to the side. "Jett Foster decided to come home!" she laughed hysterically in her mangled apron and disheveled hair. My dad didn't laugh. He didn't crack a smile. He slowly walked up to me, towering over my head and looking down.

"You want somethin', boy?" his breath reeked of whiskey. His eyes blared with intoxication.

"You want a beatin', boy? You want a beatin' like last time?" he half whispered. My mom cackled in the back, waving around an empty jug of alcohol.

I looked up at my dad and glared intensely. I turned away and went up the wooden steps. I could hear him yelling at me from downstairs, throwing bottles at the wall and stomping around. I heard him until I fell asleep.

-------

The only class I had with Alec was English, our fifth period class, which meant it would mean almost all day before I got the chance to see him. Parker and Jenna and Alec's ex girlfriend were also in the same period, which threatened to be an issue but somehow did not turn out to be so.

I thought about Alec all day, and my mind thirstily hunted for any sight of him as if he somehow had disappeared and I would never see him again. I sat down sloppily in my seat, watching the door for him to come through. Near to last were Jenna and Parker, wobbling around and stumbling into the classroom with each other in their arms, blissfully in love. Then in came Zipper and Tommy, throwing me a nod and bumped their fists on their chests. Then last stepped in Alec, whom I, for the first time, noticed was very, very handsome.

Before the incident with the ice bucket, I never paid any attention to Alec. Truth be told, he could've landed a spot in the modeling business had he had any interest in it. His eyes were big, always tired and sunken. His body had a nice, natural build and the simple clothes he wore gave focus to details on his face like the little scar on his jaw and the default, narrow look that always set across his face. I could tell that many girls had crushed on him and admired him from afar -- maybe not anymore but definitely in the past. His black eye was still very noticeable, creating a half moon under his cheekbone. He didn't look at me even once when he sat down and tiredly rubbed his face.

"How does that feel, bitch?" Parker teased, looking at Alec with disgust. Jenna giggled. People in class looked to see what was going on, but Alec tilted his head away and ignored him.

The teacher walked in with her gray hair in a tight bun. She wore thick, black framed glasses and a long tweed skirt. She greeted the class and set down her things, putting a pencil jar on her desk amongst other things. The teacher quickly wrote "Introduction to British Literature" on the board and then pressed down her skirt and looked at the class. She opened her mouth to speak, but then caught sight of Alec and gasped.

"Mr. Astor,"

Alec didn't look up. The whole class turned to him. I looked from the teacher to Alec, then back at the teacher.

"Would you like to see a nurse?" she asked, clearly worried.

"Do you want a band-aid, wittle baby?" Jenna purred. The class laughed. The teacher snapped her a dirty look in disapproval. Jenna smiled and faced the front.

"I'm fine." Alec said quietly, fiddling with his pen.

"I don't think you're fine, that looks pretty gnarly," Parker added in. "Maybe Cara should kiss it for you," he looked over at Alec's ex.

"Ew, gross!" she scoffed, throwing a ball of paper at Alec's head.

"That's ENOUGH!" the teacher yelled. Alec's eyes grew wide and angry and looked at Parker with the 'why the fuck would you say that?' face. The teacher wasn't going to let it go on, and her eyes were glimmering with future referrals. Alec bounced his foot up and down with his head in his hand, looking at the board. I knew he felt the burn of 60 eyes staring at him and looked away as if it would help.

The class continued regularly, and I found myself stealing glances at Alec throughout the whole hour. Parker caught me once, and I shook my head and rolled my eyes as to say 'idiot', and Parker nodded in agreement, running a finger across his own neck. Alec saw us doing this, and slowly turned his head back with droopy, fluttering eyes.

Class ended shortly after, and I waited for everyone to leave so I could talk to Alec.

"See ya tomorrow, man," Parker and I shook hands and I let him walk out with Jenna. Alec got up to leave, but I put a hand on his chest to keep him from leaving.

"Hey," I said. He didn't respond.

"Mind if I come over to your place?" I asked, now unsure of what he would say. He shook his head and beckoned me to follow.

We took his car back to his house. The whole ride we didn't speak a word, but I was already imaging of what I wanted to do. We walked in and he threw his keys onto the table, making his way to the kitchen. Out of paranoia, I made sure to lock the door and look outside to see if anyone followed us. Alec was shaking pills out of their containers and popping them into his mouth with water when I got to him.

"What are those for?" I asked plainly. He looked down at the bottles as though he'd never seen them before.

"My psychiatrist says I need them."

"Why do you see a psychiatrist?"

"I get heart pains. Sometimes they keep me up at night."

"Is that like, because of genetics and family history of medical issues or something?"

"No, it's not like that."

I nodded, not understanding, but letting it go.

"You scare me." He said, looking at me with round, empty eyes.

"What about me scares you?"

He shrugged.

"I don't want you to be afraid of me," I spoke softly, walking up to him and getting close. I could feel his breath in my ear. His body was tense.

"I don't get it." He said. "I don't understand you."

I guided his hands around my waist and ran my palms up his back.

"I just want you. I want you every day, all the time," I let myself drown in my desire for Alec and the helpless state he was in. Something about his torn up life made me feel a connection and like I could actually do something to benefit someone else. I said whatever I knew would make him fall for me, whatever would make him more willing to be with me. He exhaled sharply and wrinkled his face while I spoke to him, like he didn't want to believe what I was saying. I kissed around his black eye, felt his soft hands grab the collar of my shirt.

"If your friends asked you about us, would you tell them the truth?" he breathed, grabbing my shoulders when I started to unbutton his shirt.

"Yes, I would," I said, giving him the answer he wanted. "I would tell them the truth, because I have nothing to hide," I cupped his face in my hand. "I would tell them that I've been seeing Alec Astor at his house as much as I can, and I'm not ashamed." I kissed him on his open mouth before he could say anything.

The night went on with just me and him grabbing one another, us falling off the couch, breaking a vase, overloaded with sexual frustration and stripping naked, but never going past oral sex because I still wasn't sure how Alec would feel about it. I wasn't even sure if he was gay -- maybe he was just looking for some kind of emotional connection to anybody he could get it from.

He took me to his bedroom and we fell asleep under the white, cloudlike blanket with my leg over his body, holding him close to me until morning broke and I headed back home, leaving Alec in deep sleep by himself.

I went to his house every day and stayed until the nighttime, always engaging in sexual relation even if Alec was hesitant or denied it at first, always leaving in at dawn before he woke up. In the beginning of me visiting him, he would always seem unsure about our relationship, but as time went on, he gradually let go and looked forward to us being together and seeing me.

In one month, I had Alec's high school career from A to Z. I learned about how Cara played him and made him think she was head over heels; how he did everything he could for her and never told anyone her secrets but how she told everyone all of his; how she left him and joined Jenna's group and persisted to ruin him in front of masses of people; how his parents left for Brazil because they felt overwhelmed by Alec's disconnection; how he was prescribed treatment for depression and heart pain induced by anxiety or emotional hurt.

He told me everything. Most of the time I didn't react to him telling me these things in the way I should've, or I would unintentionally shrug it off when he gave up such intense information and instead focused on kissing him down his shaking body made of smooth, supple skin. But in time he stopped seeing his therapist and reduced to just three medications instead of millions, and just needed my company to be a little better than he was before we started seeing each other.

One night when I was over I just felt like loving Alec to no end and sending ribbons of passion to him. Usually we would be completely naked, but tonight it was a little chilly so we kept on our boxers. I laid him down on the bed, and set myself above him so I could have room to tenderly kiss his silky skin wherever I wanted to.

"I want to love you forever," I hummed. "I never want you to be alone again," I slid my bottom lip over his tight nipples, rubbing my face into his chest. He made a noise that sounded of distress, and when I looked up to him he wore a frown and furrowed his eyebrows, uneasily moving his shoulders. I slid my hands under his back and pulled him up to sit on my lap. I put a gentle hand to his cheek and held his face to look at me, wanting him to speak.

"I lo - "

"Don't say it!" Alec voiced loudly, pushing his face into my hand. "You can't say that to me, don't ever say it to me," he folded his arm and rubbed it against his chest, then harshly dug his palm over his heart. He shook his head and let out moans of sadness, then pushed me back so hard that I fell back and supported myself with my elbows. He started to get up to leave, but I grabbed him by the wrist. Alec tried to escape my grasp even though he was well aware that I was 5x stronger than him.

"Tell me what's wrong, Alec. Every time we see each other, something isn't right," I grabbed his other wrist and pulled myself up.

"Something isn't right, that's exactly what it is," Alec said. "I do whatever you want me to do, I let you into my house every single day and I barely know anything about you. You go from being raw and merciless to someone who for some reason loves to be with me. I don't trust you, Jett, I can't! How could I?" his breathing quickened. "I need to go downstairs. I need my medication."

"What do you want from me?" I tightened my grip on his hands. "You want me to be raw and merciless to you? You want me to hurt you?" My short temper started to kick in and I forgot who I was talking to -- but how could he not appreciate what I was giving him?

"Let me go, Jett, I need to go downstairs." Alec looked me in the eye and tried to rub his chest with his elbow.

"No. Tell me what you want from me - right now. You want me to be mean? You want me to be rough?" I pushed him down into the pillow with great force, positioning myself on top of him and still holding his wrists together. "I can be rough, Alec, it's in me, it's alive and ready, just tell me you want it," I started to break a sweat. "It's my choice to be gentle with you, it's easier for me to be impulsive and unforgiving, let me do it my way!"

Alec's arms gave in and could no longer resist my hold. I pinned his wrists down to the sides of the pillow and cravingly dipped my head into the crook of his neck, rushing him with hard, intense kisses.

"Hhhhh!" Alec inhaled, taken aback by the sudden power. I passionately kissed him full on the mouth, leaving no opening for air, delving into his sweet tongue and pushing my chest against his. His heart pounded harder than I'd ever felt a heartbeat. He breathlessly kissed back, moaning and gasping and shuddering when I cupped his head in my hand and pulled it up to kiss me deeper.