The Law of Attraction

One day we went to the mall and I even let her persuade me to get my ears pierced, I really don't know what I was thinking.

Then after a few weeks of Ashley helping to feminize me in the evenings she had another unsuccessful relationship and on the night of the breakup she, appeared in my bedroom waking me up.

I had got accustomed to wearing a baby doll night dress to bed every night, and she came to my bed, half drunk in the darkness, running her hands over my silken night dress, kissing me all over and telling me I was a beautiful girl.

This started to happen on a regular basis, her coming into my room and, kissing me and rubbing her hands over my body. And sometimes I would put up a token resistance saying that she was just making things more difficult for herself because I wasn't a biological girl, but she always swept aside my arguments saying she needed physical comfort.

In truth I was beginning to become very uncomfortable with the situation, with Ashley's on, off attitude towards me, one moment blaming me for not being a real girl and then later telling me that I was beautiful and that she needed me.

Then one night she entered my room and for the first time thrust one of her tits in my mouth telling me to suck her hard, and reaching orgasm from me sucking her tits.

Then as I was half asleep I thought I heard her whisper in my ear, "I don't know how it is going to happen but I need you to become a woman." But there again it was probably a dream.

A few days later, something really strange happened to me. I received a letter from a company called TransformSys telling me to come to their offices.

I was very curious when I arrived at the plush offices of TransformSys, asking them why they had summoned me.

They told me that a woman called Ashley Peters, as a present had paid for a Deblock Therapy session for me.

They told me that the concept behind Deblock Therapy was to unblock mental inhibitions in the brain which held a person back from being what he or she wanted in life and achieving their full potential. Furthermore they told me that the therapy was already paid for and non-refundable so I might as well take advantage of it.

Given that I was having great difficulty becoming inspired in my art recently, I thought, what the hell, if this therapy helps me, even in a small way, it will be worth it to feel more inspired in my art.

Before the deblock therapy could start, I was given what they called a pre-screening test where they put some sensors on the fingers of one hand and asked me some questions. The questions seemed really odd at first, asking me things like whether death and violence turned me on, and whether I liked causing pain to others, the second half was much more pleasant, asking me, about my feelings about other people particularly those close to me, immediately Ashley came to mind. Finally I was told that I had passed the test and I was then led to a large bright white room called the therapy room where I was told to sit down on a chair in the middle of the room.

First off, I was given a cap to wear that looked similar to a bathing cap with a cable leading out from it. I was told that this cap contained electrodes which would monitor brain activity to best tune the therapeutic session.

It was explained that the therapy was visual and sound based and not invasive in any way. I was told that I simply should relax and enjoy the video.

After the technician who had put the cap on me left the room, it suddenly became pitch black only to be replaced by a soothing mountain scene fading in.

The video encouraged me to relax and to use breathing techniques which were used in meditation, and I became deeply relaxed and personal images started to come to my mind.

First I was looking at a canvas and suddenly I started to feel I could paint freely and full of inspiration, I slapped on the paint effortlessly producing incredible effects.

Next I found myself walking down the street in full public view looking very feminine and sexy as I saw people, both men and women, at the sides of the street looking at me with desire in their eyes.

After that I was alone with Ashley licking her beautiful pussy and she was writhing in pleasure.

Finally I was standing in front of a mirror staring back at myself naked but with a beautiful pair of tits and a shaved pussy and having feminine curves in all the right places.

Later I found it seemed like I was coming awake, as if after a relaxing sleep, and I was asked about the imagery that had come to my mind.

I was then told that the therapy was complete but I had to have mandatory counseling before leaving the company premises because of the intensive nature of the therapy.

It was explained that the specific reason for the counseling was because, profound changes could occur in my life after receiving this therapy.

It was explained that the core to this deblock therapy was The Law of Attraction which when in sync with the user could bring his or her deepest desires into fulfillment.

The therapy was designed to help remove internal conflicts which were blocking the person from achieving their full potential.

The results could be so spectacular that they could become very unsettling to the person even though in reality they were the things that the person most desired.

Examples were given of people who had in a short space of time moved from being thin and weak to having an athletic physique and people very much over weight that had more than halved their weight.

Another example was a person apparently with no talent for singing and tone deaf who had become an opera singer. The most incredible example and unnerving to date had been a person in the later stages of motor neuron disease, where the disease had reversed completely returning to the person full use of his limbs.

Surprisingly his recovery was very hard for him to accept because the disease had become his life a single all encompassing fact, the idea of having suddenly to start thinking what he might do post recovery was completely alien to him, and therapy was necessary for him to handle the change.

Then the councilor asked me if I had any questions of him.

"What can I expect to happen in my life after this procedure?" I asked.

"In terms of day to day life, you will probably not notice very much at first," he said, "it is likely that you will feel more positive and relaxed about things, this is because the procedure has identified your internal blocks and conflicts and freed your mind to start working on removing them. The feedback from many people is that for this feeling of inner peace alone, the procedure pays for itself.

In a few months time though, it is almost certain that you will start to feel very unsettled. You will find that you have lost all your inhibitions, and you will spontaneously start to engage in activities that you might find very embarrassing to start with."

My mind reeled at what his statement might imply, I thought back to the dream state I had been in during the procedure. Would I start going out in public dressed? Would I start to adopt overtly feminine behavior all the time, not just when I was dressed as Jamie? Would I feel compelled to eat Ashley's pussy? And if so how would she react? It was not lost on me that I started getting a hard on just considering this possibility. I was not sure that I liked the idea of losing all my inhibitions and I said so.

"Look," I said, "why can't I just stick with being more relaxed, more at peace with myself and more confident in my abilities. Shouldn't this be enough for me to do much better in life."

The councilor replied, "Feeling relaxed with yourself and being confident in yourself will ensure that you do better in life, but it is a mistake to dissociate your inner sense of well being from the new behaviors that you need to adopt. Your feeling of being relaxed and at peace with yourself stems from your inner certainty that you will start to express your true self and be true to your nature. Besides the law of attraction simply won't work for you if your thoughts are not coherent and you still have inner conflicts.

If you did not this inner certainty, then your feeling of being at peace with yourself would be fraudulent and temporary, and while in the short term you may see benefits, in the long term you would just feel frustrated."

"But why do I need to lose all my inhibitions?" I asked. "Isn't that a bit radical? What if I were to go out and kill somebody just because they pissed me off?"

"To answer your last question," the counselor started, "that was the reason for the pre-screening. It was necessary to first determine that you were not psychopathic, psychotic or schizophrenic, or had any of these tendencies. In fact you tested off the scale in terms of empathic ability, and having a degree of inherent empathic ability is an important precondition for being allowed to have the procedure.

As to why it is necessary to lose all your inhibitions, it is necessary to understand what inhibitions really are. Inhibitions are inhibitors or as we like to call them blocks to your natural expression. They are subconsciously functioning mental routines which suppress natural expression and the key point is that have been externally imposed as part of a self structure that was adopted during childhood.

These blocks for most people are at the root of mental illness, notable exceptions being psychopathic tendencies, psychotic traits, schizophrenia, and chemical imbalances in the brain. In these cases these mental blocks still play a role but it is a more complex one.

The blocks result in internal conflicts which in turn manifest themselves in unhealthy behaviors such as codependency, neurotic behavior, paranoia, social phobias and certain personality disorders to name but a few.

For many people such as yourself, your internal blocks never manifested themselves as mental illness but have clearly been limiting your 'self expression' and by virtue of this how successful you have been in life."

"OK," I said slowly, "so I am not going to kill anybody, but there must be limits?"

"Of course," said the councilor, "you are still responsible for your own actions, and will use your own judgment in deciding whether and when to follow your drives. However instead of being restrained by automatic blocks or inhibitions, you will fall back on your own intuitive sense combined with and intellectual cost/value system. It will be a process of relearning for you, learning to trust your own instincts and desires.

Let us say for example that there is a person who would prefer to walk around naked. In this case the automatic inhibition against walking around naked is gone, but this does not mean that the person will automatically walk down the street naked, he is still going to consider the need to stay warm on a cold day and the fact that he might get picked up by the police for indecent exposure.

However he is likely to walk around his house naked, particularly when he is alone and he is more likely to look for groups where he can spend time naked with similar minded people and seek out nudist beaches when he goes on holiday. And if he is in the south of France and sees other people walking around coastal resorts naked, he will instinctively do the same.

The unsettling thing for him will be that through habit he has become accustomed to behaving in old ways which are no longer applicable in the new value system that he is developing, so just after jumping naked into a pool with fellow revelers at a party there will be a residual feeling that he is out of control. Of course over time he will become accustomed to the new behaviors."

"What you can expect," the councilor explained, "is an initial period of time where nothing much appears to change although you will feel happier in yourself and want to be more spontaneous. Then after you start to do things which push your old envelope, and see that there are little or no negative consequences, you will start to become much more spontaneous and uninhibited in your actions, this is what we call the overcompensation phase, effectively you will be trying to make up for so much time in the past feeling restrained and inhibited. Finally you will move into the balanced phase where you are becoming happy with your new behaviors, and can take things in your stride."

Finally I was required to sign documentation stating that I had undergone this therapy/procedure voluntarily, and as I was signing the form, the assistant said, "Miss Peters must really like you a lot."

I replied, "Yeah I guess we have both got to like each other over the last few months."

The assistant said, "Well she must think the world of you because this therapy costs $10,000.

As she said this my mind began to reel, why had she spent so much in this treatment for me? It was just too much. It wasn't like she was rolling in money.

On returning to the apartment Ashley was still not back. I thought to myself, "well at least I can cook a nice meal for her." I prepared shrimp pasta, her favorite and got an expensive bottle of red wine, and made a rich cheese cake for desert.

After we had eaten and were drinking our wine, Ashley complimented me on the meal, and I said, "It was the least I could do after you spent so much money on the deblock therapy for me."

Ashley said that she had got the money as an advance payment for a new Broadway show that she would be in, the thought this might be her big break. She said she was feeling so happy about this that she wanted to share it with somebody, the best friend she had in the world, myself."

I jumped up and hugged her and congratulated her and as I hugged her she kissed me hard on the lips. I was so happy for her, I did not think of myself, all I could think about was how much she deserved this. But then I thought about the money again and said, "Even so, think what you could have done with all that money?"

Ashley looked at me a bit irritatedly it seemed, and said, "Well I decided to spend it on you, and that is that, and anyhow the therapy is supposed to help you become successful, perhaps you will feel inspired in your art and even sell some, how about this, if you start to make money from your art you can pay me back."

I felt miserable for questioning her now, she was making a completely unselfish gesture and all I could do was question her about it. I certainly didn't want to piss her off, particularly after she was on a high after getting the new part in the Broadway play. So I changed the subject and started asking her about the part and how she had got it.

That night I wore a beautiful sky blue babydoll night dress and Ashley wore a black babydoll, she asked me to come to her room with her to celebrate and we took a bottle of wine with us.

No sooner were we in her room than she pushed me on her bed and started kissing me hard on the mouth, then as on previous occasions she was thrusting her tits at me, encouraging me to suck them hard. I swear to you she came twice just from me sucking her sensitive tits.

Then Ashley started sucking my tiny nipples, which for some reason seemed more sensitive than they had been before. And during all this time, my dick was hard as a rock, but as always Ashley ignored my need.

After we kissed and wrapped our arms and legs around each other's bodies and I sucked Ashley's tits to 2 more orgasms, before we finally fell asleep.

I woke in the middle of the night, well actually I estimated about 2:00 AM with an incredible hard on, my dick harder than it had ever been, and Ashley a few inches from my body sleeping quietly.

Very quietly I started to very slowly jerk myself off, not wanting to wake Ashley. As I slowly rubbed my hand up and down my rock hard dick, I felt like it would stay hard for ever.

I started imagining that Ashley was riding my pole, and as I did, I put one hand to my sensitive nipple and started pulling on it, imagining that I had a proper female breast and large nipple. Then as I approached orgasm, unbidden the image that I had a pussy and Ashley was licking and sucking it, came into my mind.

Suddenly I came all over myself, and I was just about to get up and go and clean myself up when suddenly the sleeping Ashley threw an arm and leg over me, not allowing me to get up.

Not knowing what else to do I scooped my cum off my body and brought my hand to my mouth, sucking up the warm bitter sweet substance. I continued to scoop as much of the stuff up as I could so that Ashley would not find me all sticky when she woke up, and I actually found myself quite liking the stuff.

The following morning I woke up to find that Ashley was in the kitchen area preparing breakfast for us, and being acutely sensitive to the smell of cum at that moment I went to get a shower.

As the warm water cascaded over my body my nipples felt more sensitive than usual, I decided that it must be because of Ashley sucking them the night before, then without really thinking about it I brought my hand to my male tit. "Was it a little bigger than it had been before? Nah, it must be my imagination," I thought to myself.

As I came for breakfast Ashley said, "Sounds like you were enjoying yourself in the shower."

"Oh fuck," I thought to myself and I turned bright red, I must have been moaning as I felt my tit and I had not realized it. Ashley had prepared a breakfast of omelets followed by French style pancakes known as crepes.

"This is wonderful," I said.

"Well I like to spoil my pretty girlfriend," said Ashley. There it was again she was calling me her girlfriend.

Ashley reached over and felt my tiny tit, causing me to take a sharp intake of breath, damn why did it feel so sensitive?

Then Ashley grabbed some of my hair, running her hands gently through it. My hair now came down to below my shoulders and I was proud of the achievement because Ashley was always giving me compliments about it. I noticed that its texture had become more silky than it had been before.

A little while later Ashley had to go to rehearsal and gave me a long sensuous kiss before she left.

As soon as Ashley left I went to my little studio room and set up a new piece of canvas. As I looked at the blank canvas I suddenly became inspired quickly producing a rough sketch of 2 hills perfectly rounded, each with a rounded tree at its peak.

As I looked at what I was sketching my hand felt my small tit through my thin, short yellow sundress, feeling the gentle hill like curve and imagining it was more pronounced.

Over the next three days I worked on this canvas painting with smooth brush strokes designed to give the impression of the smooth supple skin of a female breast, but painted in the color green of a soft grassy slope.

As I rubbed my hand across my soft tit I marveled at how soft my skin was, more like a woman's skin than a man's, it seemed that in the last few days it had become softer and more supple, also there was very little hair, and I hadn't shaved for a few days now.

No sooner had I finished my feminine inspired natural landscape than I started on a new painting. This time it was a canyon, a slit in the earth with soft looking folds of moss colored rocks at the edges, full of reds and oranges of a Colorado landscape with a red tinted river in the depths of the canyon. The scene was set in the evening with a full moon visible in the daylight.

That Friday I met up with a friend of mine who owned a small gallery in Queens. I had asked if she could look at some of my latest abstract landscapes.

First I showed her a New York scene at sunset called urban jungle, where the buildings had branching patterns. Annabel, the gallery owner, liked my New York scene and said there was a good chance she could sell it at a fair price, maybe $200, but then I showed her my piece with the 2 hills which I had called 'Mother Nature', her jaw dropped.