The Loners Ch. 03

I'm truly delighted at the positive reception so far. At last, we've gotten around to the moment I've been promising that some, or many, have been waiting for. This is actually the chapter I've been most curious about.

Two small notes. I know that it's been suggested to me that I get an editor to help with my writing, but there is a reason why I have not, and will not for this series only. I'm currently also writing a mainstream story that I hope to get published, which is a 300,000+ word monster trilogy that I've had to draft almost completely on my own.

While that was going on, I decided to start up this as a sort of side hobby, which, given the reception so far, I will continue. Now I have more confidence on my actual ability to write, since I've face a number of rejections on my other story so far.

The second note is that this will be the final chapter that I will write in first person view from Alan's perspective, unless of course it is demanded otherwise. The reason is that this story, which I thought was going to be a small side project, is quickly turning into something much bigger, and I didn't want to keep the entire scope confined from a single perspective. I feel it would also be confusing if I try to switch back and forth constantly.

Sorry to drag on. Let's get on with the important part, enjoy!

*****

I don't even know how I even managed to get out of bed the next few days. I felt...lifeless. Rachel, the vampire that I met, the one who managed to steal my heart over such a short period of time was gone, and my heart with her. I don't know how many more of these kinds of things I can take.

Luckily, I was able to hide the pain from everyone I interacted with, and shallowly carried on with my life. Alan Brooks, once again, the loser. Alone, and lost. In the end though, I couldn't blame her. Rachel told me when she first sat on my couch that she wasn't stay long, that she was leaving. I could only blame myself, for allowing myself to fall for her. It was so stupid! I was stupid! And I made it even worse by helping to chase her out. Instead of parting on somewhat good terms, we instead parted in one of the worst ways possible, fighting one another.

At least it was Friday, which meant that I would have the weekend off. Usually on Fridays, I would almost pretend that it would be any other day, and I would sit at home, do my thing, and mind my own business. But not tonight. I tried. I aimlessly tried to play some games, get my mind off of Rachel. But it just didn't happen. Just like the previous couple of nights, my thoughts dwelled on the amazing woman who walked out of my life.

I think this was the worst one I've ever gone through. Unlike the others, Rachel had spent a great deal of active time with me. She could have gone and done...whatever it was that vampires do. Instead, though, she chose to stay by my side. She watched as I played my games. I got her hooked on a show we were watching. No one else that I had pursued had ever done that before. I felt like I lost more than just a possible relationship, but a really good friend. Her constant presence made me feel like I wasn't so alone. That maybe I had a shot at being happy.

Not anymore. She was gone, and I was alone. I decided that it was time to revive an old habit. I just couldn't sit here in this empty house again and dwell on what could have been?

What could have been? How laughable. How about what was never going to be?

I decided to go to the bar. Luckily, I could walk there, and I didn't have to worry about my car, or getting pulled over and getting arrested, thus making things worse. Oh yeah, fun times indeed. Reminds me of the good old days when I used to do this to drown my sorrows. The bar, of course, since it was Friday, was crowded. I sat down, and began the marathon.

Naturally though, I was going to be mocked as I did this. I watched as several people around me were happily laughing and having a good time with their loved ones. Watching them be happy only made me want to drink more. What made them so damn special? Why was I stuck being alone? Because I'm a loser, through and through.

The hours passed and the drinks continued to flow. The first few were hard, since they were my first in a while, but got easier and easier. And the effects began almost immediately. It got later and later, and the bar began to empty out until it was only me. I really didn't want to go home tonight, and remind myself just why I was here, which didn't make sense seeing that that was all I thought about, but I was just too drunk to care. It was 1:30 am when the bartender turned to me.

"Shouldn't you be heading home? We're closing soon, this is last call." He asked me.

"Bah, home sucks." I slurred, badly.

"Sorry buddy, but you can't stay here." The bartender was unsympathetic.

The door to the bar opened, which I ignored.

"Sorry miss, but we're closing soon. Last call has already been announced."

"Alan?"

The voice made me raise my head. No way. There's just no way. I turned. I must be more drunk than I thought, I'm seeing things.

Two Rachels walked towards me.

"Alan, what the hell are you doing!?"

"Hey! The woman who ruined my life...wait." I turned to the bartender. "Uh, she's really there, right? A very pretty girl with brown eyes and jet black hair?"

The bartender ignored me. "He a friend of yours? He needs to go."

"I'm sorry about this, yes, he's a friend of mine, and it's probably my fault that he's here like this."

"Hey! Don't talk about me like I'm some burden. Don't you ignore me either! You know what, fuck you both!"

Rachel put her arms around me. "Allright, let's go, you're done."

"H-hey! Let go of me!" With surprising strength, she hauled me on her shoulder.

Rachel turned to the bartender. "Again, I'm sorry about this."

"It happens."

And she carried me out, with my drunken ass still attempting to object, and putting up a poor struggle at best. Before I knew it, we were inside my room, and she laid me down on my bed.

"Oh Alan, I'm so sorry about this."

"Sorry!? You're sorry about nuthin. Nuthin! Stupid, blood drinking, heart breaking vampire! You as cold as ice!" I yelled at her as she covered me with blankets.

"It's okay Alan, yell at me all you want. I deserve it. The fact that you're even angry at me like this shows that I meant more to you than even I thought. Oh God Alan, I'm so sorry." I completely missed the fact that she had tears in her eyes.

I tried to yell at her some more, but the bed was really comfortable. I instead closed my eyes. What happened next? You guessed it. The world began spinning in my mind. And that was just too much.

I don't know how I made it to the bathroom in time, but I didn't make it to the toilet, and a good chunk of my puke ended up on the floor in front of the toilet before I hit the toilet itself.

Rachel had knelt next to me as I did this, gently rubbing my back.

"Look at me." I said next. "I'm such a loser."

"Stop that! This isn't your fault, I did this to you, be angry at me. Don't be angry at yourself." Rachel told me.

The next wave hit the toilet. "But it's true." I began to cry. "I'm just a miserable fuck."

"Stop it!" She repeated, and her voice was now breaking up as well.

The next was a dry heave. And then, satisfied that I got everything out, sat down away from the toilet.

"Here, drink this, it'll help." Rachel said, handing me a bottle of water.

I took it. "Where did you get this?" I asked, taking a sip.

"That's not important, just drink it."

Not really caring at the moment, I took another sip. "Why did you come back?"

Rachel went silent for a few moments. "Look, Alan, let's talk about that tomorrow, okay?"

"Will you even be here tomorrow?"

"Yes."

"How long you plan on staying this time?"

Silence. "I don't know."

"So, going to walk out on me again, right? Why bother coming back?"

"Let's discuss all of that tomorrow. How are you feeling?"

I had been sipping the bottle during this conversation, and found it halfway gone, and stared at it.

"Like shit."

Rachel let out a brief laugh. "C'mon, let's get you back to the bed." She said, assisting me as I stood on shaky legs, and with her help, I was back in the bed again.

"I love you. Do you love me?" I asked as I nestled myself into the bed.

Silence. "I'll only answer that question when you're sober tomorrow, agreed?"

The bed was once again mighty comfortable, and when I closed my eyes, the world wasn't spinning. "That's fine." I uttered.

I don't know how long I laid in the bed after I finally woke up, but I do know this. I did not want to get up. My head was pounding, and I felt sick to my stomach. I also remembered that this was one of the big reasons why I quit drinking. Good thing I really didn't have to go anywhere.

I heard the door to my room open. "Alan? I think it's time to get up." I heard Rachel say. I moaned in response.

"Alan, it's 1:30 in the afternoon. Dave already came and left."

I moaned again. 1:30!? I relented and rose. Geez, half the day was gone.

Rachel had approached me. "Here." She said, handing me another water bottle. I silently took it and sipped.

"What do you want to eat?" She asked next.

"One where I don't have to go anywhere." I grumbled.

"Pizza it is, I'll call. I need money, your phone, and the number to the pizza place." I surrendered them easily.

"Want anything on your pizza?"

"No."

"Okay, go clean yourself up. After we eat, we need to sit down and have a serious talk, okay?"

I got out of the bed. "Sure." I said as she left the room.

As I got into the bathroom, I remembered that I had hurled quite a bit on the floor, but it was gone. Rachel must've cleaned up after putting me to bed, and I felt bad for her.

I took a nice, long shower, and almost feel asleep in the shower. I finally forced myself out, got dressed, and stepped outside the room, to find Rachel was already eating the pizza that had arrived. Now that I think about it, I've never seen her eat normal food. She looked at me and seemed to guess what I was thinking.

"What? Didn't think that we could enjoy a nice pizza? Sorry to burst the bubble, but vampires are more normal than you think."

I sat down. "Yeah, I was kind of getting that impression already."

We ate in relative silence, but once the pizza was gone, more silence passed, and it seemed as though neither of us knew how to begin.

Finally, it was Rachel who spoke up first. "How about this? You go ahead and ask me whatever question you want to, and I'll answer them. I won't hide anything this time." She said.

Great, there was only about a million of those, but the first one came out before I even realized it. "So, where have you been? After you left?" I asked first.

Her eyes lowered a little. "I was doing the same thing you seemed to be doing. Attempting to bury my feelings, and drown out the pain."

That answer caught me off guard, and she saw it. "Yeah, I was a big of a mess as you were last night." She responded, leading me to the next question.

"Why did you come back?" I asked. This time, she met my eyes.

"Because I realized that I made a mistake. I was wrong to try and deny what was happening, and I thought that maybe, after I left, it would go away. But it didn't. Instead, all it did is hurt more and grow stronger. I thought, like you, that I was being stupid as well, and that there was no way my feelings were real. But, again, I was wrong. All I did was think about you after I left, despite how hard I tried not to."

Once again, I had judged her too soon. She had gone through the same thing that I did, and it hurt her as much as it did me. I'm such an idiot.

"Before you continue, there's another question you asked me last night that I want to answer, but before I do, I'd like to ask you a question. You said last night that you loved me, is that true?" Rachel asked.

I went silent for a few moments, thinking carefully on that before I answered.

"I'll start by saying that 'love' to me, is a really powerful expression, and one I used to take lightly. But, since then, I've learned that 'love' is something not that simple. However, to be honest, I think what I feel for you may actually be love, if not, then it certainly points in that direction."

Rachel smiled at this. "Then, I can answer your question, because you asked me if I loved you, and my answer is very clear, and that is yes, I do love you."

We both went silent after that. It was out now. We had already arrived at that point and now we've both admitted it.

"So, what now?" I asked, breaking the silence.

Rachel held a sad look in her face in eyes. "This is expressly forbidden in the supernatural world. Not only was I never supposed to meet you, to fall in love with you like this means death, for both of us."

My eyes widened. "This kind of thing must have happened before, didn't it?"

Rachel nodded. "I don't know much because supernatural history is a closely guarded secret, but it probably has, and they were probably put to death or forced to hide because of it. There's no way we can amend this. Even if I turned you, I'm not a vampire Lord or a Greater Vampire, so in the end, it will still mean execution."

"Vampire Lord?"

"Yes, very powerful and highly influential, there are always nine Vampire Lords in the world at any time, and it is they who rule all of the supernatural world."

"Why nine?"

"I don't know, but there are actually ten seats total, and the tenth belongs to the legendary Dracula, Lord of all Vampires, also known as the Prince of Darkness. Now don't be mistaken. Dracula isn't the name of an individual so much as it is a title, and such an individual is born once every few hundred years or so, a constantly reincarnating being. The last Dracula existed during World War 2, and had died during the war. Again, I don't know all of the details, but we vampires are taught that much." She explained.

"I thought vampires were immortal?" Wait, dumb question, but it was too late.

Rachel shook her head. "No, we're not even ageless, we can wither and die in time, though it's true that we can exist much longer than humans. I believe the oldest Vampire that has existed was around 800 years old, give or take a decade or two."

"How does one know that he or she is Dracula?" I asked, curious.

Rachel shrugged her shoulders. "It is said that Dracula has the power that no other being can duplicate, and that is revive the dead. I don't know about that, but what I do know is that a true Dracula is the most powerful vampire in existence without question."

"Wow...so, could I be the next Dracula?" I asked with a smile on my face.

Rachel laughed. "Yeah, sure, with about as much of a chance as you hitting the lottery."

We both had a good laugh at that.

"So, how is it that this entire world lives right under our nose without us knowing?" I asked next.

"A very, very strict set of rules and laws, and enforces, both human and supernatural. Think like Men in Black in this case." She responded.

"Men in Black? So you guys can alter memories?"

She nodded. "Yes. But our case is extreme, because you can't erase emotions. That's why we have a death sentence. Sure, they can make you forget about me, but will your heart let it go? That's something they can't risk, and that's why they'll simply kill you instead."

That's the third time now that she's told me that they'll kill me. Perhaps I should have been a little more freaked out about this, but for some reason, I'm not. Maybe it was because I was overjoyed at Rachel coming back and us being together, or maybe because such things seemed so far away, I'm not sure.

She was thinking the same thing. "Alan? Are you sure you want to continue this? These aren't idle threats, and I doubt we'll be able to hide forever. Sooner or later, they'll find us. For both of our sakes, we should stop and never see each other again." She said somberly.

Silence once again passed between us as she waited for my answer, gazing at me as she did. I met her gaze as the thoughts crossed my mind. To me, it all boiled down to a single question. What was worse? Death? Or being alone? When it came to that, the answer became obvious.

"Rachel...I don't want to lose you again, that's all I know for sure." Was my response.

She smiled, but it seemed to be both a sad and happy smile. "Then I guess we're both idiots, because I was hoping we would stay together as well."

Well, since that was cleared up and we accepted what could happen, Rachel seemed to cheer up a little. "Anymore questions?" She asked.

"Well, you also said there were Greater Vampires, what does that mean?"

"Greater Vampires are ones who directly respond to each of the Lords, and are more or less the Lords' personal servants. The number of Greater Vampires depends on each of the Lord. Some have many, while others only have one or two. The same goes for the Greater Vampires, they can have as many as they want. In most cases, the more, the better."

"Wow...so where do you fall under?" I asked.

"To do that, I'll have to tell you my full name. Each Vampire is given a new name based on their creators. In my case, my full name is Caleb Rachel the third. Caleb is my Vampire Lord, and since I wasn't created by a Greater Vampire but instead by Caleb himself, I don't have a middle name, and I'm the third Rachel he's named among those that he created."

"Seems complex." I said, almost in awe.

She shrugged. "You get used to it, at the very least, all vampires are required to remember the nine Lords, so you know ultimately which clan each vampire falls under, not unlike that of the normal human naming system."

"So, can one switch clans?" I asked, curious.

"It is possible, but it is frowned upon. Think of it like this, it would be similar to you disowning your own family to go join a rival family, it happens sometimes, I guess, but those who do are forced to carry both family names to point out their blood betrayal, for the vampire in question must make a new blood bond with the new family to be fully accepted."

"Just how strong are the blood bonds anyway?"

"Again, it's similar to the blood bonds you have with your family, some of it is simple instinct, and in others some can forcibly use the bond to bend a troublesome vampire to his or her will."

"And what about you? What's your full story? You seemed to be moving about alone with no destination in mind." I asked next.

Rachel's eyes fell again. "Sixty two years ago, Caleb came into my life desiring me, and offered to turn me into a vampire, proclaiming his love and affection for me. I accepted, thinking that this was finally the one for me."

"At the time I was created, I was more or less a tomboy, an outcast. I wanted to stand out and be independent. However, this was in the fifties, a time when the women's movement had just begun, and independent women weren't socially accepted. Even my own family frowned upon my actions, and were hoping I would just simply surrender and marry a so called 'suitable' and wealthy man, and live my life as a housewife."

"When Caleb came to me, he said he liked that streak in me, said he wanted a strong woman like me in his life. Seeing that my own family had more or less abandoned me, I took his offer, believing everything he said. However, after he took me in, I realized that I wasn't the only one in his life, or even something important to him. I realized that in his eyes, I was merely another toy."

"For years, I tried to prove myself to him, and tried to get stronger. Tried to catch his eye and interest, but after six decades of waiting and trying, I'd finally had enough. It may be true that the blood bond I had with him probably helped stay my feet for so long, but, it wasn't going to bind me forever. So I ran, ran from who I was, away from Caleb, deciding that I would be better off alone, or maybe even join another clan who would accept and embrace me. I was in the middle of that journey when I found you."