The Love Of My Life, A Tender Offer

We looked at each other. We held the other's gaze. Maybe I should have moved, maybe he could have stood up from the other side of his chair and not the one where I was cramped in between his desk and a filing cabinet, possibly we could have both done something that didn't put us in this position so close together. But we didn't. Just like the manner in which we'd adjusted the way we walked together, it just happened.

And it went on. It went on happening for which seemed ages. Time seemed to stand as still as David and I stood there looking at each other. Slowly, though, his hand reached up and rested on my arm mid-way between my elbow and shoulder. He was clearly struggling to say something. I could see that. I could see his lips start to open then close again. I could see it in his eyes, in the quizzical look on his face and the taughtness in his body. Not only could I see it I could feel it. The atmosphere between us as we stood in his house was heavy with expectation.

"Amanda……..," he started and then paused.

"Yes David," I replied in a whisper

We went silent again for a moment as I felt his fingers digging into my arm.

"Oh God I don't know, I'm so confused," he said, attractively huskily.

I started to say something.

"No Amanda don't," he whispered.

"Why David?"

Still we didn't move and I knew something had to happen for we couldn't just stay there.

"What is it? What do you want me to say?" I asked.

If anything he moved even closer as he said softly. "Amanda what would you say if I kissed you?"

"Oh David," I gushed not knowing what to say. Part of me was so scared and fearful of him doing that while another part was crying out for his lips to close around mine. I didn't know whether I wanted him or not. No that's not true I wanted him but was scared to admit that to me or to say it to him.

"I don't know," I mumbled dropping my gaze and looking down my body noting with some horror that my hardened nipples were most obviously making big bumps in my tight top. "I just don't know."

"I'm sorry." He whispered moving his hand away.

"There's no need to be," I replied placing my hand on his arm, adding as I again looked into his eyes, "no need whatsoever."

"You mean that er, well that it'd be ok?"

I gazed right into his eyes and smiled as I whispered very, very softly. "Yes David I think I'd like that."

The kiss was everything anyone could expect a first kiss between two would be lovers to be. Soft, tender, affectionate and loving. Slow, languid, relaxed and tentative. Thrilling, exciting, daunting and arousing.

How long we kissed for I don't know. But as we got more into it so our arms went round each other and our hands stroked the others face and hair. Our lips moved against the other's lips and our tongues probed enquiringly at the other's tongue, teeth and lips. David sucked my lower lip and I gently bit on his. And still it went on.

I was now pressed back against the tall filing cabinet and his body was touching, well more squashed against, mine from his lips to my toes. My breasts were squashed against his chest. My tummy was against his stomach, our thighs were pressed together and one of my feet was on top of his. And of course in the middle his erection was growing against me the base of it pressing right on my pubic mound.

"Oh God I have so wanted this to happen," he whispered as he pulled my long hair away from my ear and poked the tip of his tongue into it.

"Yes David so have I, so have I," I moaned at last recognising that I did indeed want this to happen.

As those admissions of mutual attraction and desire for each other hit us both so our arms went tighter around the other and our kissing became stronger, deeper and more adventurous.

His mouth slid across my chin, under it and down the front of my throat as I flung my head backwards loving the sensation of his lips and tongue on me. I held his face, ran my fingers through his hair and kissed the crown of his head. I ran my hands up and down his slim but so firm back and felt his round me resting on and softly squeezing the swell of flesh where my bottom flares out from my waist. The atmosphere was becoming more and more erotic. The want in both of us seemed to be increasing for we were both sighing and softly moaning as at last we gave vent to pent up desires and needs we'd both kept hidden for so long.

I was back in his arms our mouths now in an unashamedly passionate way grinding together. I had one hand ruffling the hair on the back of his neck the other squeezing the top of his bottom near his hip. I was pressed back against the cabinet with his body moulded to mine his exciting erection pressing so suggestively into the softness of my stomach. I was wearing a tight, button up, sleeveless blouse I remember. It was thin and under it I was wearing a, for the times, a thin, very thin actually, bra. My pulsating hardened nipples were, as I'd noted earlier, making far too obvious impressions through both garments than decorum suggests.

I was primed, aroused, receptive and ready for him. I had accepted that I wanted him and was relieved that he wanted me as well. It seemed inevitable that we'd make love and every nerve end and sinew in my body was crying out for that. If they were crying one moment, the next, as he pressed his hardness right against my pubic mound and slithered it against me stimulating my clitoris they were screaming. And if they screamed then when his hand squeezed my breast they simply exploded.

I grunted and moaned softly with the beautiful combination of feelings. My hand round his neck pulled his lips tighter on mine while the other, confidently now, grabbed a handful of his bum urging him more firmly against my pussy. The buttons on my blouse came undone and I found my hand between us holding his length. It was then that something happened that even when we talked about it later we didn't understand. It was inconsistent with the strong petting we'd been doing. It contravened the what seemed inevitable continuation of our lovemaking. We stopped. Almost as one we discontinued. At the same time we both took pour hands away from the other and we stopped kissing.

"This just isn't right is it Mands?" He said softly.

I was confused but in many ways relieved.

"No David it isn't I replied," as he moved back a pace or two leaving me leaning there my bra covered breasts uncovered, my cleavage on show, my vividly hardened nipples poking through the lace.

"I'm so sorry Mandy,"

"Yes David so am I," I replied feeling a little embarrassed standing there doing the buttons up on my blouse as he looked on. "But you're right," I added, "We shouldn't be doing this."

I left his home and climbed into the car where Brad was anxiously waiting for me. The final few minutes had been terribly embarrassing and for the first time since I'd met David we didn't know how to act and what to say to each other.

I didn't feel able or that it was appropriate to meet him for the walk the next day. I'd soul searched, pondered and had felt awful remorse and guilt all the previous day and was still experiencing that the next morning so I walked Brad in a different place, alone.

I had this rotten combination of knowing it was wrong to have done what I had with another woman's husband. It was wrong for her, for Sarah, for Kevin and for me and what I believed in. I wasn't sure whether I'd led him on or not but blamed myself for having the coffees with him at the café and for accepting the invitation to his home. Sure he'd promoted both ideas, but then men do don't they. All it needs is for us girls to say no and any temptation disappears. I hadn't either said no or shown any reluctance so I assumed he'd thought I was up for anything as, for a time, I was.

The other part of me, though, the woman as opposed to the mother and wife, thought a little differently. That couldn't get the feel of his lips and hands on me and the experience of holding his erection out its mind. That regretted him stopping.

I picked up the phone around lunchtime. Possibly the last voice in the world I expected to hear was David's for we'd never exchanged numbers.

"Mandy I'm sorry to call you, it's David." The familiar but surprising voice said immediately sending a tremor of anticipation and excitement through me.

"That's ok," I replied.

"I was worried when you didn't turn up this morning for the walk. I hope you don't mind me getting your number from directory enquiries?"

"Worried? No of course I don't mind David"

"Yes I thought maybe that what happened yesterday meant that you didn't want to see me again."

As he said that the mum and wife part of me wanted to agree but the woman part stopped that and I heard myself saying. "Sorry I didn't think, I just needed time David."

"So you still want to see me then?"

"Yes, yes I do." I whispered, half of me so wanting that, the half dreading it

It was warm the next day. As we'd agreed on the phone we met a little earlier just after nine. I was wearing shorts and a sleeveless golf shirt that, not being on the course, I could wear outside my shorts. And, when David got out of his Mercedes estate car I saw that he was also wearing shorts. He hurried over to where I was standing, smiling all the way.

"Hi," he said his eyes boring into mine just as they had in his house yesterday.

"Hello David."

"I'm so pleased you're here Amanda."

"And I'm pleased to be here," I replied as the two dogs bounded about around us.

We started walking both of us positively, I thought, avoiding the topic that was hanging so heavily between us. We talked of general topics for the length of the walk away from where we parked our cars and whilst we had coffee. It was only as we were passing through a fairly heavily wooded area a couple of hundred yards from the end that it came up, and how that happened I just have no idea.

Suddenly we were having one of those;

"I didn't know if you cared,"

"I've felt something for ages,"

types of conversation. That, inevitably I suppose, led onto.

"But knowing you were married,"

"I didn't want to cause problems," statements to each other. And then to,

"Yes I did enjoy Tuesday,"

"I didn't really want it to stop,"

"But it was the wrong time and the wrong place."

That of course moved the conversation into the area where I think we both wanted it to go but were afraid to take it.

The,

"Yes I would do it again,"

"Yes I will to do it again," and

"Yes I want to do it again right now," as once more I was in his arms and we were kissing quite furiously.

There wasn't the tentativeness this time. We didn't need to pose questions and or wait for invitations. We knew what we both wanted and this time we felt able to go for it right from the outset.

David pulled me further into the woods so that anyone passing by would be unlikely to see us. We sat on an up rooted tree and we kissed and kissed and kissed. The dogs lying beside us, for they were now tired, we kissed the way that lovers who are experienced with each other kiss. Confident and relaxed, assured and adventurous.

Our hands behaved in a similar manner and it was after only a relatively short time that he was gently, at first, squeezing and caressing my breasts outside my golf shirt. I showed him no resistance whatsoever for he was doing precisely what I wanted him to do so, when I felt the tips of his fingers on the bare skin underneath the shirt just above my waist, I did nothing to deter him. Nothing at all to stop or divert him. Not one action, deed or word to stop him sliding his hand up inside my shirt and right onto my tits. And when he found them and started squeezing and rubbing them through the thin bra I felt my entire body responding to him. It seemed to explode with amazing sensations everywhere. As that happened there was nothing in the world that my befuddled by sexual arousal mind told my body I wanted more, than to be fucked by David right there and right then.

I hadn't had sex in an adventurous place for such a long time that even the possibility of someone walking past and seeing two bodies writhing around in sexual ecstasy didn't faze me.

So;

as he eased each boob out of its cup,

as he rolled the shirt up,

as he exposed my breasts to the open air and, more importantly, to his gaze,

as he stoked my bare flesh and squeezed my swollen nipples for the first time,

and as I undid his shirt and ran my hands over his lightly haired, firm and slender chest,

my mind was on just that one thing. Being fucked by him in the open air.

But of course we couldn't do that. Inevitably we stopped just soon enough. Like the two respectably married people we are we resisted the terrible temptation to make love there and then.

Laughing and making little jokes about it we acknowledged that we shouldn't, but we agreed we wanted to and, more to the point, that soon we would have sex. We would have it for we had to. As simple as that. We agreed that we had to have sex together. It was an essential thing for us to do.

As I readjusted my bra and top we stood up and I saw inside his thin trousers the wonderful bulge of his erection. I didn't say or do anything. We weren't sexually comfortable enough with each other yet for me to offer him a quick blow or hand job. Although a large part of me wanted to feel him, to remove his trousers, to see, my soon to be lover naked and rampant for me.

"Hmmm," he smiled looking down at it, "we'd better take our time getting out of these woods."

As we walked I opened up the topic of his wife and family.

"Look Mandy I don't know where we're going with this, I don't what'll happen to us and how long anything will last." David replied a little oddly I thought my heart missing a beat when I thought, "maybe he'll stop it now."

He went on. "I've never done anything like this, I've never been unfaithful to my wife and quite frankly, I've never really strongly wanted to."

I looked at him rather quizzically I suspect as I said, genuinely enquiring of him. "But you do now?"

His arms around me, his opened lips on mine and his tongue deep in my mouth was answer enough really. But as the wonderful words he used,

the

"I've never desired a woman so much as I so utterly desire you."

and,

"I've thought of little else than making love to you for weeks Mandy,"

crashed into my mind giving me all the extra assurance I didn't really even need but so adored having.

He went on.

"But I think we need to agree one thing Mandy."

"And what's that?" I asked now confident that he wasn't trying to end things before they'd hardly begun.

"I think we should try to avoid talking about our families don't you?"

"Yes, yes I do," I replied both relieved that was all he was going to say but also agreeing with him.

We reached the cars and stood there for a while.

"So Mandy what do we do now?"

"I don't know," I replied moving slightly closer to him and brushing a lock of hair away that had, attractively tumbled down his forehead. "I've never done anything like this before either you know."

"No, no of course you haven't. Forgive me I shouldn't have asked that."

"Don't be silly, that's ok," I whispered, glancing around the small car park surrounded by trees and seeing no one kissed him softly on the lips. "You don't need forgiveness for anything."

A smile on his ruggedly handsome face he said as he cupped my breast.

"Not even for doing this?"

I smiled back, "Especially not for doing that," as I pressed myself against him.

"Or," he went on gently stroking my nipple, "suggesting we need to make love."

"No David nor for that even though," I hesitated before going on, "it is such a big step isn't it?"

"Yes love it is. And I sometimes wonder," he said hesitantly whether we'll be brave or silly enough to take that step. Do you know what I mean?"

As he said that with such plain sincerity and honesty on his face I think the last resistance to me falling in love with him simply faded away although it was some time before I could admit that to myself let alone him. I slid into his arms and loved the feeling of them closing round me. He was so strong and made me feel so safe and comfortable.

"Yes darling," I whispered my mouth pressed against his chest thus muffling what I said. "I know exactly what you mean. It's terrible isn't it?

And that was the theme of our thinking and our relationship over the next ten days or so.

I was totally torn. Emotionally bisected. I had some of the most exciting moments and anguishing times I've ever experienced. When I was with David I wanted him so badly and I would have done anything he asked of me. When alone I visualised us together, firstly just naked, then making love and then on my more flights of fancy, living together. But when I was with Kevin and Sarah reality clicked in and deep down I felt there was no future and if that was the case should there be a present I wondered? If longer term we were bound to fail then why break my vows, why cheat and lie and why be unfaithful to all I'd held dear for so long? But almost as soon as I posed that question in my mind my body interrupted the logical thought patterns with a powerful answer.

"Because you need a good fucking by a man you love as opposed to one you're becoming to loathe! It advised me, probably correctly.

I, and so he told me, he as well, varied from.

Thinking , "this has to stop."

To David undoing my bra and me taking it off.

From. "We mustn't go further."

To me holding his erection inside his opened trousers and him running his fingers around and inside my pussy.

From "We really should end it."

To us coming so near to making full love on two occasions.

Once when I sat on his lap facing him and he undid my top and unclipped my bra and I got his erection out. It was pressing right against my panties. Right against my soaked pussy lips inside them. He pulled the material aside and touched me there and I nearly climaxed. I pressed his hard cock against my clit and we both knew we were so close but somehow we stopped.

The next day though I was leaning back against a tree deeper in the woods. I'd taken my bra off and his hands had pushed the skirt I'd purposefully worn right up round my waist. His trousers were also undone and I'd been stroking his erection. It would have bees so easy, so simple and I think we probably would have finalised this conflicting inevitability had not been for us hearing the dogs bark warning us of someone approaching.

That short period of nearly "doing it" got harder to take when we were apart but more amazingly exciting when together. Looking back I'm, in some ways pleased we didn't' rush into full sex for that week or so of that heavy petting in those woods was so exciting that I shall treasure it for the rest of my life.

It was teaming down. One of those torrents that you just know is going on all day. There was no way we could walk the dogs but we met in any case.

"Follow me," he smiled from his car to mine.

We went deeper into the forest down ever narrower lanes until we reached a dead end in a clearing. I followed him across to the furthest corner that was slightly hidden from the rest of the clearing by the way the trees hung down. David got out mouthing to me through the noise of the rain on the leaves to stay where I was. He undid the tailgate of my Volvo estate and took Brad out and put him in his car. He then got into the back of mine throwing his waterproof over the back of the seat.

"Is madam gonna climb over or walk round?" he asked laughing.

It was there in the back of my car, in a clearing in a forest, with the rain pouring down where all my vows and beliefs went out the window. There where I was unfaithful and committed adultery for the first time. There where the full sexual side of our affair started for it was there in that car in that forest that David fucked me for the first time.