The Most Demanding Audience

That may seem to be too much of a generality, but I will use my own experiences and the scores in the top lists to show why I believe it to be true. This is strictly my opinion, and you are perfectly welcome to disagree with me, and to express that disagreement.

As of right now, the evening of December 11, 2006, the four highest ranked stories in the Anal category all have scores of 4.80. Only two other categories have top ranked stories as low as that, and they are special cases. Loving Wives has one story ranked at 4.80 and everything else is lower, but those relatively low scores reflect hostility rather than an epicurean taste in erotica.

Trolls read the stories in the Loving Wives category and, when they read about something they don't like, particularly "slut wives and/or wimp husbands", they launch their one-bombs. Such votes do not reflect on the quality of the writing, and are just expressions of the trolls dislike of the subject. Some trolls will one-bomb a story if it is about a cheating wife who is caught and suffers the consequences. Other trolls will do the same if she gets away with her cheating.

Once in a while an author will foolishly believe the Loving Wives category consists of stories about women who love their husbands and are faithful to them, and will write a story about such a phenomonon. This story may also be one-bombed, but by a different breed of trolls, those who are angry and disappointed that it is NOT about wives cheating on their husbands. Votes such as these are not the only thing keeping scores low but they are the primary thing.

As of December 11, 2006, the highest score among illustrated stories is 4.71. However, low votes in this category are usually not so much about the story as they are about the accompanying illustrations, which have to be drawings or photographs by the author. Most of the drawings are crude and unattractive sketches which will detract from even a well-written story or article. Usually, the photographs that are included as part of illustrated stories are so innocuous, because of restrictions placed on the authors, that they add nothing to the narrative and turn the readers off. They may not launch one-bombs, but votes as low as three or two are not uncommon.

Fans of anal sex rarely launch one-bombs either and, when they do, it is usually going to be for extremely inferior work. Anybody who objects to the genre won't read it. Anal sex will almost always be about a man fucking a woman's ass, so those trolls who object to gay or lesbian sex will also not be heard from. Occasionally, if the story includes interracial sex, another class of trolls may express their bigotry, but most anal stories are not interracial.

That's not to say that even a well-written anal story will never get hit with one-bombs. If, as is usually the case with my writing, the man licks the woman's ass before fucking her there, some readers will consider this to be a disgusting perversion, and will respond by voting as low as possible. Omitting that particular pleasurable act is not the solution, at least not for me, and there are two reasons for that. First, I always regard anilingus as an important part of any anal story. Unless it's a Group Sex tale, where anything is liable to happen, I never write about a cock penetrating a woman's ass without the man's tongue caressing her there first. I did in some of my earlier stories, but I don't any more.

Second, the majority of anal fans feel as I do -- the man's tongue should precede his cock. If it doesn't, they won't usually throw one-bombs, but they won't vote very many fives either. Not only will they not vote high scores, they will add a public comment or email chiding the author for omitting such an important part of the story. Readers of anal stories are, presumably, people who like to perform that sex act also, and think they know just how it should be done to bring maximum pleasure to both participants.

Besides the man not licking the woman's ass, regular readers of anal stories will express dissatisfaction for other reasons, usually by voting 3's and 4's. The story must be up to their standards, and those standards are high. The woman's buttocks must be shapely and unblemished on the outside and lined with smooth, hairless skin on the inside. She does not have an asshole, unless that is a reference to a disagreeable husband or other person in her life. She might have an anus, but usually it's a rosebud, or some other pleasant and descriptive word, and it is always sweet, clean and either pink or brown, depending on her race or ethnicity.

Not only are they very particular about the appearance of the woman's ass, they require that this lovely body part be treated in certain ways, besides anilingus. Lubrication is a must, applied liberally to her rosebud and to his cock. Penetration must be done slowly and with consideration, being careful no part of her anal sphincter or any other loose skin has been caught. Personally, when I read a story where these things are not done, I usually stop reading and vote a two or three, depending on how bad the story had otherwise been up until that point. An exception would be if the story was actually satire, making fun of how fucking is portrayed in porno movies, where the penetration is frequently done with one hard thrust. Anal rape might be another exception, but neither of these kinds of stories would usually be included in the anal category.

Generally speaking, anal stories are stroke, and that's what most readers expect. Mine definitely are, probably even more than most. Those reading stories about anal sex expect down and dirty smut, rather than great literary efforts. For that reason, too much plot or character development might be considered to be a negative quality, not bad enough to rate a one-bomb, but bad enough to garner a low score.

At the same time, nobody wants the smut to begin with the first sentence. There has to be some buildup, some description of the circumstances, some introduction of the characters. Like porn readers everywhere, those who favor anal stories like to be able to imagine themselves in the story, and that requires preliminaries such as these. Once the action has begun, anal readers want to be able to visualize what is happening, which requires descriptions, of what the characters see and feel and hear. This is not unique, of course. All readers want the same things, but it seems like readers of anal stories will react more strongly if they don't get what they want.

What they don't want is clinical type descriptions. Nobody wants to read about inserting Tab A into Slot B, but anal fans abhor such stories more than most. They want to know that everybody is having a wonderful time, and they want to be shown this by painting pictures with words. They want to see her beautiful ass with the soft, satiny skin, and his big, thick cock. They want to hear the cooing and moaning and sighing and purring and whimpering of exquisite pleasure. They want to feel her ass squeezing their cocks as they plunge them slowly in and out, or they want to feel their asses being split wide and their rectums being spread open as his big, thick cock surges deep inside.

If they don't see and hear and feel these things, they will be as miserly with their votes as Scrooge McDuck is with his money.