The New Year's Resolution Fairy

He was even tan, somehow.

"Ahem," Sassyfras interjected as he spun in circles in his mirror in just his briefs, inspecting himself from all angles with awe and his first-ever taste of vanity.

Brad couldn't pry his eyes off himself, but he did have the presence of mind to say a quick "wow, thanks" before resuming his vainglorious eyefeast.

She grinned, pleased to see him taking joy in her handiwork, delighted with the thoughts of the walking billboard this chiseled Adonis would be. "So there's one down."

"Oh yeah!" He'd almost forgotten his other resolutions. "Next was... get laid?"

She giggled. "Maybe we come back to that after #3."

"Oh yeah!" He hooked his thumbs into the waistband of his underwear, eager to see his new package.

Instead, he saw the sad, shriveled thing that had been there before. "Hey, what gives!"

"Same thing, bucko. You need to, you know, exercise it – to get it in shape." She grinned impishly.

"Oh." He looked down, concentrating on getting hard. Nothing. He nervously took it in a hand and started working it manually, but it was likewise slow going. "You know, having you watching me – and giggling like that – isn't helping any."

"Ah, we can fix that," she chirped merrily, then waggled her fingers towards his laptop. The pornographic likeness of the top-heavy fairy peeled itself from the screen and emerged into the room as a three-dimensional representation of itself. The concept was clearly inspired by the old cartoon movie, wavy blonde hair in a loose bun, clad in a skimpy little green outfit with boobs the size of her head bulging most of the way out of the top, threatening to burst free with each breath.

"Oh hey, Bradley," it said in a sensual purr. "I'm a big-titted slut fairy, and I'm super hot and sexy and I want to be sexed by you."

"Well that's a bit heavy-handed," he mumbled.

"No," insisted the little blonde fairy. "I have tiny little hands, that are soft and delicate and fairy-like, just the way that turns you on. I will touch you with them now in a sex-like way." She floated over to him; it seemed as if her ephemeral wings were struggling to support the added bulk of her proportionally enormous breasts. She came to hover in front of him at crotch level, making good on her words as she wrapped her arms around his semi-flacid member in a hug, then stroked up and down, tickling with her hands.

"Wow. That's really fucking weird, but... kinda feels... good," he admitted sheepishly.

"Believe me, Bradley, I know. This is super fucking weird, doing sex stuff with someone so little that having sex with her would be like trying to fuck a thimble, but it's so hot anyway because I have giant fairy boobies and a sexy voice and am so hot for you," she said, then added her teensy little mouth and tongue to the process.

Strange and over-the-top as Sassyfras' creation was, it still did the trick. Soon, he was growing in her arms, jutting upwards until he was pointed at the ceiling. Then he kept growing. And kept growing. Kept growing to the point where its weight started pulling it back downward, its thick red mass pointing almost menacingly at the mirror before him.

"Whoa," he said.

The blonde faux-fairy swung up and perched on his pecker, grinding herself on it softly. "I love your super-gigantic wiener, Bradley. It's stupidly huge and much huger than other men's."

He brushed her aside. She yelped, but disintegrated in a heart-shaped puff of smoke before hitting the floor. Brad inspected it from the side and again from the front. It was a porn cock.

"Whoa. That's..."

"A great big dong? You betcha." Sassyfras grinned smugly. "Though definitely more wish than resolution, FYI."

"So now... we get laid?" He smiled hopefully.

"Yep – AND we'll boost your grades!"

"Yeah!" Then he heard it, and blinked. "Wait, we'll what?"

"I was gonna let you figure it out for yourself, but well, I've come this far with you, may as well see it through. Your brain's good and mushy by now, so... C'mon." She held out one tiny little hand. He imagined how small the brush must have been to paint the barely-perceptible designs in her nail polish.

He reached out a finger, and she grabbed it. "Where are we going?"

"Don't ask questions, dear."

"OK," he agreed instantly.

Her teleportation bubble projector seemed to be working fine by now, as a sprinkle of pixie dust later, he found himself standing in a hallway in an unfamiliar apartment building. He wondered where it was. Hard to say. Brad wanted to ask, but she'd told him not to do that.

Sassyfras rang the doorbell, then repeated her disappearance spell from earlier. "Now I'm just going to whisper in your ear what to say and do, and you just be a peach and do it for me, and we'll get your resolutions wrapped up, OK?"

"Um, OK. If you're sure you know what you're doing." He felt her feather-light weight land on his shoulder.

"I'm an expert at talking to humans. Trust me." He nodded, relinquishing his doubts.

A minute later, a woman answered the door. She looked to be in her early to mid-twenties, pale and freckled, shoulder-length dark brown hair pulled in a pony tail. She was dressed for vegging around the house on her own New Year's Day in an old sweatshirt and black leggings. "Oh my God...!" she said, seeing the chiseled, semi-erect stud before her.

"Say hi," whispered Sassyfras.

"Hi," said Brad.

"What are you doing here?" she exclaimed in a loud whisper, flushing as she couldn't resist inspecting his body as surreptitiously as she could.

The fairy tried to think of the kind of line a human woman would find romantic, erotic, then whispered her best guess in Brad's ear.

"I'm here and erect because I like to have sex, and you seem like the kind of sensitive, intelligent and unbelievably arousing woman with whom I could do that kind of thing." After a reminder, a big smile lit his face.

"Is this some kind of practical joke?"

"The only joke would be me joking about not wanting to have sex with you, because I do." Brad winced a little at the lameness of the line, but the fairy had seemed so confident, and he didn't have any idea what he'd say if he had to think for himself.

The woman looked as if she still didn't believe him – she looked out into the hallway in both directions for a hidden camera. Her suspicion, however, was being eroded by the sight of the beefcake before her.

"Are you, like, a male prostitute?"

"Nope, having sex with me will cost you no money – it will be free, and I will make you feel good in your own sex parts," he assured her. He forced his smile even wider.

"This is insane," she said, temptation getting the better of her as she tentatively ran her fingers over his well-defined six-pack. "C'mon, what's the catch. Why are you here?"

Sassyfras thought about how upset Brad had been to be surprised after the fact, and thought it might be better to (gently) be up front about their intentions. She fed Brad a nuanced explanation.

"Well, you're the TA in my mass comm class this semester, and I would like to start earning a better grade by giving you amazing sex. Though I find you interesting and our time together has been meaningful to me, so it is not just for that, but also deep personal reasons."

She seemed to have only heard the first part of his explanation, and responded accordingly. "Wait, you're here to..." she paused. "Well then. Why don't you come on in."

Brad was rather surprised she caved so easily. Had she done this kind of thing before? "What's your name, stud?"

He waited for Sassyfras to tell him before realizing he could handle this one on his own. "Brad."

"Well, you just call me Ms. Hawkins – just to keep things clear between us."

"Yes Ms. Hawkins." She took his hand, leading him through an apartment that looked to still be recovering from the previous night's festivities, empty bottles of champagne and trays of past-prime hors d'oeuvres sitting out all over the kitchen area. She lead him immediately into the bedroom. It was sparsely decorated – hardly even looked lived in, compared to the rest of the apartment.

Sassyfras alighted from his shoulder and watched from a perch atop the dresser. She'd been using her grimoire during that inconvenient wait that morning, and it was staggering how many of the folks on her list had resolved to have more or better sex. A little reconnaissance here might be useful, and it was only a small delay.

"Looks like you got a little head start on me," she joked, and then began to take off her clothes. Beneath her sweatshirt was a practical black bra, and her leggings concealed mismatching pink-and-blue striped underwear. She invited him to unclasp the bra, which he managed with the nervously trembling fingers of his powerful hands. She took care of the panties herself.

Ms. Hawkins took good care of herself. She was tall and willowy, with a nicely toned butt that complemented her long, dancer's legs nicely. Her breasts were small but perky, dusted with some of the same freckles that decorated her face. She lay down in her bed, a modest full size that would barely hold them, and patted the space beside her invitingly.

Brad eagerly hopped in beside her, glad to be given some direction. "Now, if you want a good grade, I expect you to put forth your best effort," she said playfully.

"Oh I will, Ms. Hawkins," he said sincerely. "Do you want me to...?" He gave a meaningfully glance to her nethers.

"Well, well, well, look at you, diving right in – that's the kind of ambition I like to see in a student," she said, spreading her legs permissively.

Brad swallowed nervously as he eased down to the lower part of the bed. "I've, um, never done this before," he confessed.

"Ah," she replied awkwardly, some of the strangeness of this encounter returning as her legs inched closer together.

A little voice was suddenly back in Brad's ear, and he reflexively repeated its words. "Sorry, I was distracted by the sensual longness of your legs," he said apologetically. "What I meant was, I've never done this before with a human woman as beautiful as you surely must be."

She arched an eyebrow, but made a quick deductive leap. "You're sweet," she said. "And I have to hand it to you, I can barely hear your accent. Your English is pretty good."

He might have wanted to correct her misapprehension, but he was too busy heeding Sassyfras' instructions. He positioned himself between her legs and lowered his mouth toward her shakily. Brad started with a few soft licks at the crest of her labia, gently opening her up and easing them both into the intimacy of the moment. She gave him a happy sigh to signal her approval, and then he got to work.

Doing exactly as he was instructed.

"All right, get your tongue in there," the fairy said, pushing down on the back of his head, and he slid it into her as deep as he could. "Simulate human sex, but with your tongue." A surprised but pleased-sounding moan rewarded him as he was set him to sliding his tongue in and out. Brad wondered what fairy sex was like, but this was no time to question his helpful guide. And it was easier not to have to think for himself anyway.

Sassyfras figured she may as well check things out for herself; she'd done the standard gnome dissection in college, and humans seemed basically gnominoid. With Brad still working inside the woman, the fairy lay down on the back of his head and took the woman's clit in both hands, squeezing it softly (she was too small to squeeze it any other way) and massaging it. Gentle caresses, light tickle-ish fingertip grazes.

"Oh shit, how are you doing that?" the woman asked rhetorically.

Brad pulled out just long enough to give voice to the fairy's reply. "With my incredible love of lady sex parts," he said, as charmingly as he could manage. She nudged him back down, and the two resumed their task. It was fun, kind of, toying with this woman in such a way, eliciting her ragged moans and squeals. It was like kicking a mushroom and seeing what pattern the spore cloud made.

The two worked Ms. Hawkins to a screaming orgasm, after which she gripped his hair (just missing a fairy wing) and tugged urgently. "Get your ass up here, Brad."

Confused, but having little choice after Sassyfras' power had had its way with him, he stood up and sat down near her head, thrusting his powerful glutes towards her. She laughed. "You're such a goofball." Still, she enjoyed a lengthy grope of his offering, purring appreciatively at his taut, powerfully toned ass.

"Now you said you came here for sex; did you mean it, or was that just another of your little jokes?" She grinned sensually, one hand teasing her dripping pussy.

"No, I meant it, Ms. Hawkins," he said, and quickly positioned himself over her. He needed no preparation; he was as hard as he'd ever been – harder, thanks to the New Years resolution fairy – and she was still more than ready to accept him. He glided into her smoothly, pushing slowly to allow her to adjust to his girth.

From her vantage point on an upright suitcase in the corner of the room, Sassyfras observed the humans rutting with a clinical eye. His powerful hips pistoned his monstrous cock into her with the intensity of a beast; her slender legs wrapped around his waist and pulled him in harder after each thrust, as if her repeatedly howling demands for just that were somehow inadequate. His muscles bulged and rippled as he experimented with new uses for them, shifting between positions at intervals, the willowy woman doing her best to keep up with his intensity. Brad was on his back, hands gripping Ms. Hawkins waist and pumping her body up and down on his gargantuan new dick, when he came; considerately, he kept pogoing her on him until she too shudered with one final orgasm, then collapsed limply on top of him.

Like most human mating rituals, it was sweaty and clumsy and leaky in all kinds of places, and she couldn't imagine how the process of thrusting a man's big hard cock into a woman's tight wet pussy could possibly be as much fun as they all seemed to insist it was. But then, one of her good buddies in school was a satyr, and he swore by it, too, so maybe it wasn't just humans.

Either way, her work here was done. She smiled proudly at her creation as he asked his lover what he should do next. Another ten months or so and his will power would be back to normal. (She hoped his efforts to seduce his art history professor, a sixty-two-year-old Italian man, went as well for him.) She blew Brad a farewell kiss infused with fond memories of the beautiful, fragrant teeth she'd plucked from beneath his pillow as a boy, and with a puff of glitter so subtle neither human noticed, she moved on to her next beneficiary.

A moment later, a woman threw open the bedroom door. She looked a lot like Ms. Hawkins, but a little older, a little thicker. The younger Ms. Hawkins grinned sheepishly at the new arrival as she covered herself with a sheet. "Hey, sis... one of your students swung by to earn a little extra credit in advance."

Brad looked between the two women, comprehending immediately, but unfazed. Maybe he hadn't been able to get two resolutions done at once, but he'd still gotten one of them, and that was still pretty good.

He stood up, his powerful body and semi-erect cock the object of unabashed stares of longing from both. He let them stare, and waited contentedly for them to tell him what to do next.



Meanwhile, somewhere else altogether...

"Wait, you're who?"

Sassyfras grinned, striking a cocky pose, hand on hip. "I'm the New Years resolution fairy, and today's your lucky year."